A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I think I'm in love with this girl because I saw her at a store the other day and my heart started pounding really fast, I got light headed, I was weak in the knees, and I got dizzy. Here's the catch: she's my best friend's sister.Let's call my friend A and his sister B. I've been friends with A for 10+ years. B and I hardly ever talk to each other, and I don't know what to do. Isn't there some kind of unspoken rule where you can't date your best friend's sister or something? It would be really awkward to tell A how I feel about B.I keep having dreams about B; they aren't sexual dreams or anything like that, one dream was where B and I were cooking supper together, and last night I dreamed that we were killing zombies. I know that last one sounds weird, and I can't remember any other dreams, but I don't know what to do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your help janniepeg, I don't know if you'll see this or not (it's been a while since this all happened), but I did tell her how I felt and she said she thinks of me as a brother, and wants to stay just friends. It did not ruin my friend ship with her or my best friend, and now I feel better that I told her. Thank you, again.
A
male
reader, olderthandirt +, writes (12 October 2011):
Your sub conscious is talking to you try listen up
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (12 October 2011):
Talk to A about what the unspoken rule means to him, just about the general idea. Remember the wildest infatuations can mean nothing in real life. if you befriend B it's possible she's acting nothing like what you had in your dreams and imaginations. You can ask to hang out with B so you can get a more realistic view of her.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI guess I should have clarified, my best friend, A, is a guy.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (12 October 2011):
You are infatuated with B and it is very strong. The body symptoms are very real but your body does not think, and it does not not who's the one. It dictates who you are attracted to, and sometimes there will be wasted energy. One day A would be infatuated with some other guy. One thing you have to make sure is that A is not secretly in love with you. Perhaps you can make a pact with A that even in the future you will be married to other people you will remain best friends. See how she responds to this.
You may choose to avoid talking about B but your mind is consumed with B that you find there is less space to connect with A. A will definitely notice a change in you and being a best friend you should not have to hide anything. Being a best friend, for me, means to accept that one day my friend will join hands with a significant other and I will no longer be a priority, but there will be special things we do to remember our special bond from time to time.
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