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This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
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This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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Why do they ejaculate on my belly? Is this normal?
Q. I am on the pill and recently started having sex. Even though I am supposed to be safe, the boys I've been with still pull out and ejaculate on my belly. My friend tells me all guys like to do this. Is this normal? Is it necessary at all?...
A. 3 June 2008: I'll be the elephant in the crystal shop. Ehem. Have you heard about "coitus interruptus"? That is when the man pulls his penis out, so he "won't get the girl pregnant". We all know this is no good, because some semen does get into the girl ... (read in full...)
Why do they ejaculate on my belly? Is this normal?
Q. I am on the pill and recently started having sex. Even though I am supposed to be safe, the boys I've been with still pull out and ejaculate on my belly. My friend tells me all guys like to do this. Is this normal? Is it necessary at all?...
A. 3 June 2008: Ask_Oldersister pointed to a good alternative. However, if they wanted to be really sure, wouldn't they use a condom?... (read in full...)
Why do they ejaculate on my belly? Is this normal?
Q. I am on the pill and recently started having sex. Even though I am supposed to be safe, the boys I've been with still pull out and ejaculate on my belly. My friend tells me all guys like to do this. Is this normal? Is it necessary at all?...
A. 2 June 2008: "Normal" is a word that I frown on defining. Is it "normal" to eat pork? For a hell of a lot of people, it isn't. "Usual" seems a better word here.
I suppose that many younger guys do ejaculate on their girl's bellies. It's not necessar... (read in full...)
I'm ugly and it gets me down....
Q. Ok, so Im a 15 year old girl and I have major self-confidence issues. You see, Ive got an Ok body but my face is really ugly. I think its ugly and so do other people. Its my nose that makes me ugly - its too big and horrible and makes my other ...
A. 2 June 2008: What you need is self-confidence. If you walk around trusting yourself, and you're a good person, you will find eventually find more than one who will love you to bits. Let me tell you a little secret: your looks are not everything. And your ... (read in full...)
I'm worried about the way my girlfriend's vagina looks may have something to do with her past!
Q. I have a rather strange question to ask here... I am curious about vagina... I have been with a variety of different women (sexually), and up until recently I have always encountered generally the same type(ish) vagina... Usually tighter, snug, not ...
A. 2 June 2008: I think your real concern isn't whether she has had a lot of sex before, but whether she's a slut.
I have never perceived changes in the vagina of a woman I've been with. I suppose they do change with age, and I know for a fact that they change w... (read in full...)
Couldn't control our feelings, she's 12, could she become pregnant?
Q. I am a 14 year old boy having sex with a 12 year old girl. We know that we did something wrong at this age but could not control our feelings. We are neighbours and it all started with a kiss. Then we started looking each others private parts. ...
A. 2 June 2008: In our countries, girl sometimes mature earlier and they can have children at a younger age. So, the answer is yes, she could get pregnant. Maybe the chances wouldn't be that big, but they exist anyways, and this would be a terrible problem for ... (read in full...)
I'm not sure how to treat him after he said 'At the moment, I just can't be bothered.' Thoughts?
Q. Hi, well, a guy asked me to go out a couple of times, so we went on a few dates, but never got into anything serious, and it was all very innocent-nothing more than holding hands. I wasn't too sure whether I liked him or not, but I had a lot of t...
A. 2 June 2008: "At the moment" is a very tricky phrase. It can mean exactly what it means, that is, "right now and for a short period of time", or it can be a way to tell you to get out for an indefinite period, which can last forever. You can see that in your ... (read in full...)
Wife's been keeping her mobile close and has mysterious messages on her facebook page!
Q. ive been married for 2 years and dating for 8 years and my wife has been going on face book for about 3 months shes been acting weired since then she keeps her mobile close to her chest when before she hardly use to go out with it ,i started to get ...
A. 2 June 2008: Sounds like she is interested in the guy. I don't think people normally hide the existence of a person from a partner if that person is just a friend. Maybe you're a jealous man and that is why she is hiding his name. But it does sound odd.
... (read in full...)
I'm not attracted to either of the two guys who are after me. Is it right to not to choose either of them?
Q. Hey guys! Im sure this isn't the most important of the questions you will have seen!But I thought id ask anyway... Well im no longer in a relationship. My boyfriend and I broke up about 2 weeks ago. The problem was i was to clingy,but im un...
A. 2 June 2008: I would say that YES, not choosing any of them is the right thing to do. It should make you proud to think this way. You may not have "the physical perks" of a relationship for a while, but you won't give anyone false hope, either. I think the ... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend want to cum on my face?
Q. Why does my boyfriend want to cum on my face? ...
A. 2 June 2008: I agree with the girls. He's seen this in porn, liked it, and wants to try. If you don't want this, don't do it. I wouldn't find it important.... (read in full...)
Second-Life is ruining my real life!
Q. Hi, I've been seeing my fiancee for 9years, and known her for over 10. A couple of years ago we started having problems within out relationship because my fiancee was feeling too tired most nights to talk to me let alone anything else. So,I s...
A. 2 June 2008: It will sound horrible, but I recommend that you give her all the time and space in the world. After some time (only you can decide how much) without communication, call her again and ask her where you stand. If you don't hear what you want to ... (read in full...)
Second-Life is ruining my real life!
Q. Hi, I've been seeing my fiancee for 9years, and known her for over 10. A couple of years ago we started having problems within out relationship because my fiancee was feeling too tired most nights to talk to me let alone anything else. So,I s...
A. 1 June 2008: Everyone will hate me, but I wonder if there's a connection between her using Second Life to "cyberdate" other men, and the robber putting a knife to her throat. It doesn't seem so. My region is among the most violent in the world. Many of us are ... (read in full...)
I am scared to try BJ again!!
Q. I was recently told I was awful at giving a guy a blowjob. I mean, it was my first time and all, and he knew that. He just simply told me I was awful at it. I asked him what I could do to improve and he just said "get better" while shrugging. I know ...
A. 1 June 2008: Maybe you need to learn a little about oral sex, but he needs to learn a lot about how to deal with problems in bed.
Some people seem to have been born with excellent instincts for lovemaking. Most others need to learn. You need to learn ho... (read in full...)
Second-Life is ruining my real life!
Q. Hi, I've been seeing my fiancee for 9years, and known her for over 10. A couple of years ago we started having problems within out relationship because my fiancee was feeling too tired most nights to talk to me let alone anything else. So,I s...
A. 1 June 2008: I would doubt her feelings. I think you should tell her that you will give her some time to sort her head. If you don't hear from her in a given period of time, move on.... (read in full...)
Could this be the cause of his discomfort?
Q. My boyfriend says that sex can hurt his member. He is well endowed while I am rather petite. Could this be the cause of his discomfort?...
A. 1 June 2008: I doubt it. Sounds like an excuse. He would need to be aberrantly huge.... (read in full...)
How much space is too much?
Q. I've posted before an wanna know how much space is to much? Me an my guy have been on an off an well we currently off now...well sorta. We live together with another couple to an for a week i gave him sooo much space. I spent all this time in my ...
A. 1 June 2008: He doesn't have to know you checked his phone, don't worry.
I believe that, if someone asks for space, all you can do is give that person all the space in the world and try not to see or communicate with the person in any manner. My definiti... (read in full...)
It is getting harder and harder for me to watch this "love rectangle" go on...
Q. As my friend Ashley said this instead of a love triangle this is a love rectangle: Kate is my best and roommate. On her boyfriend of five years, Tim's 21st birthday another one of our friends, Dave, told her that he was falling in love with her...
A. 30 May 2008: You can only control what you do. If this guy Dave loves YOU, and you love HIM, then it should be easy for you to decide what to do.
If your friend loves her boyfriend, it should also be a no-brainer.
All this takes is a little courage. ... (read in full...)
My divorced BF wants to take our relationship to the next level, how will I tell him I'm a virgin at 38?
Q. Hi I think my divorced boyfriend wants to take our relationship to the next level but i dont know how to tell him i am still a virgin at 38, what do i say to him as i am not sure how to tell him, i dont want him to think there is something wrong ...
A. 30 May 2008: There's nothing wrong with your being virgin at 38. You just decided to wait. If this is the right time to lose your virginity, well, do it. I'm sure he will enjoy being your first man.
If you feel a little nervous about having sex, maybe th... (read in full...)
I want to try cunnilingus one day but I feel it's disgusting... how to get over this feeling? How to start?...
Q. i want to try cunilingus one day because the i hear it's satisfying to ladies. but i feel it's disgusting. can anyone tell me how it feels like in your mouth and how it smells? i have this feeling there's a bad oduor in there. how do i start?...
A. 30 May 2008: If you feel cunnilingus is disgusting, I'm afraid no one can help you.
As to having an odor, well, all women have it. That's because the vagina is an open organ; it's always exposed to the entrance of all sorts of microorganisms (includi... (read in full...)
Inflamed lip on vagina, what could this be?
Q. Anyone please help, I've noticed that I have an immflammed right flap on my vagina. I've had unprotected sex with my boyfriend because I'm on the pill but he is clean I think. What could this be? Please help I'm really worried.!! Thanks....
A. 30 May 2008: This could be a yeast infection. I think you should consult a doctor, just to make sure.... (read in full...)
I am married, love another man who doesn't love me!
Q. I am married for the past 10 years. I married when I was 18.My husband is 12 years elder to me. I was doing my graduationwhen we got married. Now for the past 3 years , I have a relationship with this guy who is a colleague at the instituion where I ...
A. 30 May 2008: It is clear that your marriage is in trouble. Maybe it's not that much about the age gap, though, but about other issues. First, you need to determine what you want to do about your marriage. If you honestly want to end it, do. If you honestly ... (read in full...)
Am I being too picky? I think he's capable of doing some of this household maintenance by himself...
Q. I'm in my early 40's. I am an Aries and a giving person who loves to make others happy. I was married at 25 for 8 yrs, and divorced. I have since dated 2 men each for 3 yrs and the one presently now for 2 years. The first BF had a drug problm, the ...
A. 30 May 2008: I think he can do his own paperwork and stuff. Maybe he just doesn't want to, or is just procrastinating. Heavier work seems to be out of the question, at least for now, since he had hip surgery. I find it reasonable that he pays someone else to ... (read in full...)
'Truth or Dare' game leads to an awful revelation by my wife! Am I over-reacting?
Q. I've been cruising this site on and off for a while. I like to read the questions and have even given my own advice a few times. Now it is my turn to ask for advice. My wife and I had a party last weekend. After the group dwindled down to 12 or so...
A. 30 May 2008: I can understand that you don't want your private life to be in the public domain. I also understand that you sort of expected her not to reveal anything just too sensitive. But, the fact remains that you two played the game, and that was because ... (read in full...)
My husband insists that we have a MFM! Is he gay!?
Q. Why does my husband want to have threesomes with his long time male buddy and me? When he first tried to get me to do this by playing stip video games, I was very upset and went to my bedroom alone in tears. He continued to try to get this ...
A. 30 May 2008: Maybe he is gay, and this is his manner of introducing another man into the bedroom.
I have a little personal problem with this kind of request. I wonder how anyone can want his woman to have sex with another man. Being cheated on is horribly... (read in full...)
I'm worried about my penis... have I damaged it?
Q. I have this serious problem.The left side of the head of my penis has a bit of foreskin attached.After 3 years of vigorous jacking off it's taken it's toll.I now have this bruise like mark down the length of my penis where the skin is being ...
A. 30 May 2008: I'm not sure why you're getting surgery, but I'm sure it won't be anything horrible. If it were, your doctor would have told you by now.
Many penises don't have perfect simmetry, and they do change over time. I'm sure you have noticed that you... (read in full...)
I'm in love with a mature lady, the problem is that my classmates are making jokes about me! What should I do?
Q. Dear agony aunt, I´ve got a really big problem. I´m in love with a mautre lady. The problem is that my classmates know it and they make jokes about me. The girls in my class laugh and that makes me angry!! Why cant people leave me alone. I just wa...
A. 30 May 2008: Being with this "mature" lady is your business. Don't pay attention to people.
Many young men have relationships with older women. Many men have sex for the first time, or "learning periods", with older women, "mature" or not. What is the matt... (read in full...)
'Truth or Dare' game leads to an awful revelation by my wife! Am I over-reacting?
Q. I've been cruising this site on and off for a while. I like to read the questions and have even given my own advice a few times. Now it is my turn to ask for advice. My wife and I had a party last weekend. After the group dwindled down to 12 or so...
A. 30 May 2008: My opinion is that you should have never agreed to such a game. You should have thought in advance what that might lead to. Since you played the game, face the consequences. I think this game was played exactly because everyone was a little drunk ... (read in full...)
What should I do? Tell her about my true age?
Q. i met my girlfriend when i was 13 she was 18,i told her i was 16,im now 23 and she's 28 what should i do/how should i tell her? (p.s we never had sex before i turned 18) i would also like to know if iwas ilegal for me to like make out with her a h...
A. 30 May 2008: I guess she knows you're younger than she, and I suppose it your telling her your true age would not do much harm. I also suspect that she knows, already.
If your wanting to make out with a girl is illegal, then all men should be put in jail by ... (read in full...)
Why can't I stay away from this woman that keeps making up then breaking up? Why am I in this childish relationship?...
Q. What a mess I have made of my life. I met the woman of my dreams 10 months ago. Tall, beautiful, funny, sexy, great career, an absolute dream. Things were amazing immediately. The chemistry was out of this world. After a few months of dating we ...
A. 30 May 2008: She can be amazing, but she isn't. She has serious troubles and you just can't help her, because she won't let you or won't help herself. Don't hate her, but make a clean break once and for all. You owe that to yourself.
Sometimes being du... (read in full...)
Is this rape or sexual assault?
Q. i have a problem with my boyfriend - he wants sex and every time he tries to put his penis inside of me it really hurts. Last time we tried to do this he would not stop trying and I ended up crying - he then became violent and covered my mouth up ...
A. 30 May 2008: I'm not familiar with legal categories in Britain, so I will speak from a moral point of view. He tried to force you to have sex, and then insulted you. You are right in feeling wary of him. I wonder if you really, really need to collect that ... (read in full...)
Will guys see me as a slut now?
Q. I was wondering if i was a slut. Its been on my mind for a while now. I am 15 and I am not in a relationship but lost my virginity recently. He wasn't my bf, but i really like him and don't regret it. Well anyway I did most things with him (bj, ...
A. 30 May 2008: I can't speak for everyone, but I wouldn't see you as a slut.... (read in full...)
Is it wrong if I throw away my boyfriends' divorce papers?
Q. When cleaning house, I came upon my boyfriends divorce papers. Is it wrong if I throw the divorce papers away myself?...
A. 30 May 2008: Poster, it seems you're worried whether his keeping the papers or not removing them from your sight might mean "something else". I wouldn't expect that to be the case after ten years.... (read in full...)
Don't know what else to do, looking for solution to get her back for good!
Q. my gf is 45 and i am 37 e have been together like 15 months and broke up many times she always doing the breakig and me falling to pieces and not giving the space she wants alway convincing her to give it another try this time she says she has run ...
A. 30 May 2008: Sorry, buddy. You have to let go. There's nothing else to do. You can't make a person stay with you.
Take good care of yourself and walk with your head up.... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for me to date my friends' brother even if she said it was ok?
Q. Hey everyone, Here is what is going on. I am really good friends with this girl, we will call her Erin. We have so much fun together and always love being in each other's company and everything. However, she has a 19 year old brother. I am a...
A. 30 May 2008: This is not Erin's or any of your friends' business. You and John are both free, you're the right age, and you like each other. That's what counts. Don't pay attention to anybody else.
Good luck with John!... (read in full...)
Emotions or reason? Which one to follow?
Q. Emotions or reason? Which one to follow? I met her twelve years ago while traveling (became barely friends). I liked her and visited her once more few months later. I had decided not to come back. She was young (19 and I was 28), little careless,...
A. 30 May 2008: Everyone has felt like you do. If only we had...
It seems to me you are somewhat unhappy in your current situation. If you were absolutely happy, perhaps you wouldn't remember this French girl. Or you would, but you certainly wouldn't wonder w... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is not able to have kids and I want to. What should I do?
Q. Hi, I have been with my girlfriend for about 7 months now. Just recently she had to have Hysterectomy done which means she will not be able to have kids. I love her to death but I also would love to have kids (my own biologicla kids). So, my qu...
A. 30 May 2008: This is a good question. The answer will seem simple for anyone not personally involved. Either you stay with her, or you leave her. I think you could perhaps adopt a child. This child wouldn't be biologically yours, but those are your ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong if I throw away my boyfriends' divorce papers?
Q. When cleaning house, I came upon my boyfriends divorce papers. Is it wrong if I throw the divorce papers away myself?...
A. 30 May 2008: Definitely, yes. These are documents he might need to have handy. And they are his documents. If you found them while cleaning, it's obvious they were tossed away somewhere; that is, they are unimportant to him, but he is aware he might need ... (read in full...)
Was he flirting or just being friendly?
Q. GUYSnGALS i need ur help...there's this guy i know before but im getting to know and talk to him very much...aswe were getting to know things about each other what we liked, disliked...he asked me whati like in aguy and viceversa...it turned out ...
A. 30 May 2008: He's obviously flirting. Maybe he should try to get your attention in other ways, however.... (read in full...)
Any suggestions for raising a low sperm count?
Q. Myself and my fiance have recently undergone tests to see if we can have a baby together. My results were clear but he has a low sperm count, does anyone have any suggestions on how if it's even possible to raise his count?...
A. 30 May 2008: Doctors call this condition oligospermia. If you go to an urologist, he will check whether your husband has some sort of obstruction; that is, he will check whether the cause for oligospermia is permanent or temporary.
If the cause is permanen... (read in full...)
"Yipee my son is going to be a womaniser". Why do they talk like that?
Q. Why is it i constantly hear women with young male children, speaking to another woman. OOOH he's a proper lad he's going to be a bit of a one with the women, then a beaming smile. Like whats this all about? Yipee my son is going to be a womaniser?...
A. 30 May 2008: I always forget things. Where I live, there's this "colorful" expression: "Keep your hen in a safe place; my rooster is on the loose". If we even have a saying about it, do you think this hasn't been happening for long?... (read in full...)
"Yipee my son is going to be a womaniser". Why do they talk like that?
Q. Why is it i constantly hear women with young male children, speaking to another woman. OOOH he's a proper lad he's going to be a bit of a one with the women, then a beaming smile. Like whats this all about? Yipee my son is going to be a womaniser?...
A. 29 May 2008: I respect other people's opinions, and I'm sure they are speaking from their hearts. However, the women I've heard saying "my son is a womanizer" or "he must be gay because he didn't sleep with me" (even if the man is married or otherwise TAKEN), ... (read in full...)
Why do some men wear a band around the penis during sex?
Q. Does anyone know why some men wear a band around the penis when having sex? Does that really help with erection problems or something like that?...
A. 29 May 2008: For the curious, that ring can also damage the penis. Essentially, it prevents the flow of blood from the penis back to the heart and lungs, where blood gets oxigenated. That is, you're sort of choking your little Peter. Do you still like the ... (read in full...)
"Yipee my son is going to be a womaniser". Why do they talk like that?
Q. Why is it i constantly hear women with young male children, speaking to another woman. OOOH he's a proper lad he's going to be a bit of a one with the women, then a beaming smile. Like whats this all about? Yipee my son is going to be a womaniser?...
A. 29 May 2008: Oops! As to why some women would say this (not most women, of course) we would need to ask them, specifically. Double standard, they call it.
Have you also heard it in the other "flavor", "He didn't even respond to my advances. I'm sure he'... (read in full...)
"Yipee my son is going to be a womaniser". Why do they talk like that?
Q. Why is it i constantly hear women with young male children, speaking to another woman. OOOH he's a proper lad he's going to be a bit of a one with the women, then a beaming smile. Like whats this all about? Yipee my son is going to be a womaniser?...
A. 29 May 2008: In my humble opinion, you've hit the nail. This indeed happens. Believe it or not, I've even heard one woman say this to her son (who, by the way, has six children with four different women): "I told you to come where no one would know you, but, ... (read in full...)
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