A
female
age
36-40,
*ummyummy123
writes:I've posted before an wanna know how much space is to much? Me an my guy have been on an off an well we currently off now...well sorta. We live together with another couple to an for a week i gave him sooo much space. I spent all this time in my room. Then he started asking my roommates when i will come down. So i started going down an well we been talking again an flirting an things been going great. He even sleeping in my bed again. The thing is one day i did the worst an checked his phone an saw that he is also into someone else. Shes REALLY young so i shouldnt have to much to worry about but im afraid. They only work together, they dont hang out or anything. But i dont know what to do. I was thinking of giving him more space but then i dont wana give to much that i push him away. What do i do? We been through another girl before an he ended up choosing me over her so thats cool. I kinda have a feeling that it might happen again but i dont know how to handle it for right now. He cant no i looked at his phone, he wont trust me anymore
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (1 June 2008):
 He doesn't have to know you checked his phone, don't worry.
I believe that, if someone asks for space, all you can do is give that person all the space in the world and try not to see or communicate with the person in any manner. My definition of "space", then, would be what you consider too much of it. I don't think this forces anyone to leave you. This is what the other person asked for, and is getting it. The proof of this is the fact that he asked about you and went back to your bed.
I find it kind of odd that he asks for space when you two live in the same home.
The fact that he's into someone else does matter. It's not important if the other girl is very young; what counts is that he's acting on his interest in her.
The problem I see here is not the "space", but the fact that you're in an "off-on" relationship. Personally, I don't like that: either you're with a person, or not. So, I think this is what you would need to discuss with him. I think you should be the only girl he sees, or then he shouldn't be seeing you.
You need to be strong. You can't be at another person's mercy. If he is to go, let him go; and never take him back. If he is to stay, then he needs to be faithful. Period.
Hope this helps.
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