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This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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Is he too damaged for a real relationship???
Q. I am confused about a friendship with a newly divorced man. Need to know how to interpret mixed signals and if we can/should make our friendship a real relationship. A couple of months ago I met a man through mutual friends. At his request ...
A. 14 March 2008: It seems like he is comfortable with things as they are now and would never want them to change. So I think you will never have a full relationship with this man. He might keep you in this same situation forever.... (read in full...)
Is he too damaged for a real relationship???
Q. I am confused about a friendship with a newly divorced man. Need to know how to interpret mixed signals and if we can/should make our friendship a real relationship. A couple of months ago I met a man through mutual friends. At his request ...
A. 29 December 2007: I think you will have to wait and see. I have an opinion about this, but I will not say a word. I will wait and see, too.... (read in full...)
Does he still have feelings for me?
Q. About three months ago i split up from my first proper bf, we had been together for about a year and generally had a really good relationship. I had to split up with him because i was really depressed at the time because i was being bullied ...
A. 8 September 2007: Honestly, I couldn't tell whether he still has feelings for you. Obviously he was very hurt. If you still love him, maybe you should tell this openly and see what turns out. However, I'm afraid the odds are against you. I don't mean to be hurtf... (read in full...)
The love of my life has moved on and has a baby now
Q. I was to late! The man who asked me to marry him ten years ago, has now had a baby with a new women. We text as friends, but i so wished it was me and not her who was with him. Im happy for them both, but it should have been me, having his baby. ...
A. 8 September 2007: You don't say why you didn't marry, but I suppose you turned him down. Otherwise, he would have married you. In my opinion, you must have had a good reason not to marry him. And, it's only when he has a baby that you picture a life with him. ... (read in full...)
Do guys care as much about weight as girls imagine them to?
Q. Do guys care as much about weight as girls imagine them to? Or do girls simply create this belief that most guys like slim girls? I'm in a fairly new relationship and i'm really happy with my boyfriend but i'm extremely insecure and am completel...
A. 2 September 2007: I'm fully with Sandman.... (read in full...)
Don’t know if he got too "settled" in the relationship or I tend to overanalyse things and expect perfection!
Q. I have been seeing this guy (34 years old) for 3 months and I feel confused as to what is going on in this relationship. I don’t know if he has just got a bit too settled in the relationship so is not making so much effort as he did at first (which ...
A. 2 September 2007: I agree with Escalaya in the sense that overanalyzing things and expecting perfection is generally bad. However, I'm with you in feeling that odd things are going on here.
I don't know why he texts you if he can talk to you. Hearing someone'... (read in full...)
She doesn't answer the phone when I call, or she'll answer and promise to call me back but never will.
Q. Hi, I am 18 years old and decided to start experimenting with a relationship with another woman 2 months ago. The biggest problem is that she's 39. It was troublesome at first, but after a couple of nights together we both feel much more ...
A. 2 September 2007: No, you're not doing anything wrong. The right thing here is not to call her anymore, and keep her in your memory as a good experience. Yes, you're becoming a nuisance; don't ever be one.... (read in full...)
Why do I hear women complaining about their first times, while I felt no pain?
Q. I always thought I would bleed when I first had sex and that it would be painful...but I didnt bleed at all and there was barely any pain at all. I always imagined it to be this horrible feeling and stuff, but it didnt hurt much at all. After my ...
A. 2 September 2007: Because it hurt for them, but it didn't hurt for you. Some women don't feel any pain at all.... (read in full...)
Is she playing games??
Q. I was in a relationship for 3 years. The first year was amazing we loved and cared about each other so much always showing affection and always trying to please each other, the second and third was up and down, and now this last month and a half it ...
A. 2 September 2007: This may not be the advice you want to hear, but, in my humble opinion, the relationship is well over and you should move on.
It's obvious that she loved you. But, the love isn't there anymore, and she made that clear to you when she broke up... (read in full...)
How important is income level to love? My bf doesn't feel my finances are solid enough...
Q. How important is income level to love? My friend who is really my boyfriend doesn't want to look at it that way lately because of money. I support myself, but he doesn't feel my finances are solid enough. I know that many relationships have fou...
A. 1 September 2007: Love is a feeling, and I fail to see how being able to care for someone, and being cared after, has something to do with the kind of job you have or the money you make. He's making excuses because he doesn't love; he is just looking for "a better ... (read in full...)
A married woman is flirting with me at work, what can I do to avoid this situation?
Q. Hi, apologies for the length of this... but I really need your help. I'm 23 years old, single, and have been working for a large company for 2 years now, and recently a married woman (she's 34) has been flirting with me. I've told her no, st...
A. 1 September 2007: I'm with Frank and duce00.... (read in full...)
How come guys never noticed me as brunette but now i'm blonde i'm sexy. How come??
Q. hey, Recently i dyed my hair blonde, and now that i have guys make comments about me and stuff like that. Im not bothered im just curious to why guys are making comments about it, im also getting called sexy now that im blonde where as when i was br...
A. 31 August 2007: Because you look different. But, if you were not beautiful as a brunette, dyeing your hair would be no good at all. So, the beautiful part of it is YOU. The dye is not that important.... (read in full...)
Is he too damaged for a real relationship???
Q. I am confused about a friendship with a newly divorced man. Need to know how to interpret mixed signals and if we can/should make our friendship a real relationship. A couple of months ago I met a man through mutual friends. At his request ...
A. 31 August 2007: If I were you, I would run to the hills and put him not on the "friends" drawer but on the "failed relationships" one. I doubt he will ever commit to you. He said it straight: he is happy with things the way they are now, and a little sex would ... (read in full...)
He seems to enjoy the chase and we keep breaking up, only for him to be chasing me again, and the cycle continues. Is this going to go on forever?
Q. I am in this strange relationship for 2 years now. He chases after me, I feel intense feelings of joy and excitement (absolutely high), we get closer, I start chasing him, we become very intimate and then he pulls away, says his frightened. I feel ...
A. 31 August 2007: I'm with hlskitten. See it this way: you can break the cycle. Tell him you've had enough. I doubt he will ever stop doing this unless you force him to.
If a relationship makes you feel pain and anger, it's no good.
Take care.... (read in full...)
My guy emigrated and wants me to follow. He seems to be using me for what I can take over there with me and I'm wondering now if I should even be going??
Q. My boyfriend emigrated to the other side of the world about 6 months ago and wanted me to go with him. I have visited once and am due to see him again for a couple of weeks very soon as it is a big step I want to be sure. I feel a bit concerned ...
A. 31 August 2007: I'm with jjs. On the other side, obviously you have a lot more to lose in moving, and he should take this into consideration.
There is one thing that makes me curious. He emigrated despite the fact that you were not sure you wanted to leave. ... (read in full...)
I've lost a lot of weight which is good, but my cleavage went with it! Help!
Q. About a year ago I lost 25 lbs.through a great program. Unfortunately my boobs also got smaller, which is to be expected I suppose, but even now that my weight has stablized and I haven't lost any more (In fact I've gained back 10 lbs.) but my boobs ...
A. 31 August 2007: I'm afraid that there are not solutions to this. However, I suppose that, as your cleavage went, so did other not-so-desirable characteristics. Do you think one thing compensates for the other? Maybe we men would.... (read in full...)
I've moved from germany to USA when i was 12. Why do people here not feel its right for teenagers to have sex under 18?
Q. I was born in Germany, and I moved to the USA at the age of 12, since I've moved here I have always been curious as to why having sexual intercourse is such a bad act and disrespect to the parents for Teenagers under 18. In my town, it was ...
A. 31 August 2007: Being from Latin America, I would like to add something to the debate. Our country was not founded by Puritans, but by Catholics. And is still run by Catholics or former Catholics. However, the age of consent here is 18, and that was established ... (read in full...)
A girl I like said I was 'nice' What does 'nice' actually mean?
Q. There is this girl that i have met, she is very pretty and has a great personallity. After a couple days of knowing her i asked her what she thought of me, and all she could say was that i was "nice". my question is what does she mean by "nice"?...
A. 31 August 2007: I'm with duce00. By the way, "nice" means "nice". Don't ever read deep into words.... (read in full...)
Does anyone know what's her problem?
Q. I am friends with my ex. Now this is the important ex. We have been just friends for a long time now. But I've been told by people in the past to just leave her and not see her again. The thing is I am in a way the best friend she has, she has a ...
A. 31 August 2007: Her problem seems to be that she doesn't respect people and doesn't treat them well, so, in the end, everyone goes away. No one can put up with her way of being.
YOUR problem is that you let her do this to you all the time. If she won't give you... (read in full...)
Did my unsigned letter scare him away?
Q. i have liked this guy, who works as a contractor to the buildling i work at, for about 6 months now. he seems to get on very well with the guys in the building and has a lot of friends, but when it comes to women he seems to clam up no matter w...
A. 27 August 2007: Maybe he's married?... (read in full...)
He said our relation wasn't "exclusive," I slept with an ex and now I feel guilty. What should I do?
Q. I met a guy at work recently and we started sleeping together, I have started to get a bit attached to him and told him, only for him to tell me that he couldn't cope with a relationship right now and could we remain sex buddies for the duration, ...
A. 27 August 2007: As to the relationship with the first guy, the one who "can't" be in a relationship for the moment, he is a sex buddy. If you're fine with this, regarding him, then it's OK. And he can't say anything about this, nor should you feel responsible or ... (read in full...)
Is it normal for the condoms to be looser or am I just lacking girth?
Q. OK so I got regular sized condoms and I'm wondering if they are supposed to be skin tight. Because they are a bit loose on me and I was always under the impression they were supposed to be really tight, is it normal for them to be loose or am I ju...
A. 27 August 2007: Condoms are all roughly the same size, usually 50 mm in girth (55 for the "extralarge") and something like 180 mm long. One size doesn't fit all, of course.... (read in full...)
I can't tell if guys are flirting with me, plus ex problems!
Q. I have a few questions here. After being newly single after many years I am confused if a guy likes me or is just being "friendly". I have been in a few situations where I thought we were just "friendly" and then BAM! he thinks I like him or he ...
A. 27 August 2007: It's very difficult to answer your question in the way you state it. Maybe other people could give you "general" principles, but I would need specific information. Feel free to e-mail me and summarize a "real-life" case, so I can give you an ... (read in full...)
Is this normal?
Q. One of my outer lips is bigger than the other. By that, I mean, it sort of hangs loose, and I can stretch it (sorry if it's too graphic.) Is that normal or should I be worried?...
A. 27 August 2007: Male perspective: absolutely normal.... (read in full...)
I dont feel like my girl loves me anymore! But i dont want to lose her...
Q. Ive been with my girlfriend for 8 monthes now and its got to the point where i feel she dont love me no more. We've had our problems but i still love her dearly. I get the impression she hates me. We went away for a week, we didnt kiss hug or even ...
A. 27 August 2007: In addition to what the other agony aunts have said, which is great, I have one question for you: why would you want to be with someone who doesn't love you anymore? I know that letting go of her is painful, but, think of it this way: you need ... (read in full...)
We havent gone past first base and my mates think i should dump her, how long do we wait before moving on from kissing?
Q. Ive been going out with this girl for about 6 months now, we're roughly the same age and we still havent really got past the kissing and hugging stage. my freinds keep asking me "how far have you got" etc.. and when i tell them they tell me to dump ...
A. 27 August 2007: I wouldn't dump my girl on the basis of whether my mates think that sex should happen at a given moment. This is your own and your girl's business only.... (read in full...)
Why would a man join an online dating site if he has been in a relationship for almost 2 years????
Q. Why would a man join an oline dating website if he has been in a relationship for almost 2 years?...
A. 27 August 2007: A man in a relationship will join a dating website because he is looking someone else before he dumps the unfortunate lady he is with at the moment.... (read in full...)
He talks about his times with other women, we're extremely unhappy, but neither of us will leave
Q. Hi. I want to know how I should deal with my relationship that I am very unhappy in. I have a 7 month old daughter with my boyfriend of 2 years. Before I reached my seventh month in pregnancy, my relationship was perfect. We were happy, we enjoyed ...
A. 27 August 2007: Yes, you desperately need help, and I hope these comments of mine do help you.
I don't really know where to start, but, for God's sake, stop the weed and the smoking, the drinking. Whatever your problems, your unborn child is absolutely innocent... (read in full...)
I'm 21 and want to ask out a 17 year old boy, is there anything wrong with this?
Q. I'm a 21 year old female and have a crush on a 17 year old boy. He acts very mature for his age and he has made it quite clear that he wants to hook up with me. Is there a problem with going for him?...
A. 27 August 2007: I can't tell you how much I'd love to be in that guy's situation. If you plan on having a little action with him, check if this is legal in Canada. Otherwise, have fun.... (read in full...)
I never seem to 'get the girl' at the moment! Any tips on internet dating or getting succesful when I'm in clubs???
Q. Hi, I'm a 32 yr old virgin, I have a good job, live with my older brother in a inner city apartment and have always found it difficult to connect with women from as long as I remember. The few times I've got to know some, I've always been bran...
A. 27 August 2007: Man, you're the classic good shy man who has trouble connecting to women. You have defined yourself quite well. My advice is very simple: review all the mistakes and all the times you've been branded "a nice guy", and try to ascertain where ... (read in full...)
I want to have sex, but I'm worried about my breasts. Any advice?
Q. im sixteen and i have some concerns about having sex. This is going to sound very stupid but im really worried about my breasts. I was making out with a guy and he went under my bra and i kept pushing him out because one of my breasts has a sort of ...
A. 27 August 2007: I think the little pimple is simply a hair that got entangled. Some men have this problem in their beards, so this is absolutely natural. I've never had that problem myself, so I'm sorry I can't help you with how to remove them.
As to your nip... (read in full...)
If i give in to anal sex, will he want it all the time?
Q. If I give in to anal will he want it all the time? He drives me wild but our last time he placed his hands around my neck i came big time. Now he scares me. Is he curious or trying to warn me? ...
A. 27 August 2007: I fully agree with Smeedle.... (read in full...)
My guy hasn't contacted me for ages now, should I try and reach him or consider the relationship over???
Q. My boyfriend (we'll call him Alex for the sake of the discussion) hasn't contacted me in 7 weeks now. The last time he called, I had not heard from him in 2 weeks at that time. He was talking about personal, family and work problems but would n...
A. 27 August 2007: I'm fully with penta. The relationship is over and he wasn't mature enough to let you know. His talking about problems is another flavor of good ol' "I'm busy".... (read in full...)
We dont have sex, he's got a small manhood, but everything else is perfect. Should i have an affair?
Q. Hi, I'm in the same boat. Well, I haven't met anyone else but I married my husband in April of this year. We've had sex once in 12 months. We have a brilliant friendship, we have fun together, can talk about everything and he loves me like no one ...
A. 26 August 2007: My suspicion is that his problems with erections are new. I suspect this because I suppose you had sex before you married, and I assume that, had there been a problem in this department, maybe you wouldn't have married.
That said, he can't do... (read in full...)
The date went great, so why is she avoiding me?
Q. Alright I need advice what to do here... I've been on a couple dates with a girl I really like, things have been going great, but now all of the sudden she won't talk to me. Won't answer any phone calls, when I sign online she either sets h...
A. 26 August 2007: I agree that you deserve an explanation but you won't be getting any, no matter how much you try. Trust me: I've been there. I'm giving you the advice that will spare you the heartbreak, the agonizing, and the wasting of your time. If you wa... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has opened a "man seeking woman" account in the Internet. We are planing to move together in December, should I confront him?
Q. Is is ok for my bf to open up a personal account "man seeking woman" on the internet? We've been dating 3 years on a long distance relationship, well we we lived together for a year and now he has moved away again (work related) a couple of months...
A. 26 August 2007: Yes, you should confront him as to why he is doing this. And, to be honest, I also think you should forget about him. I don't think a man in love would do what he did. And, I anticipate he'll give excuses when you confront him. Trust is most ... (read in full...)
The date went great, so why is she avoiding me?
Q. Alright I need advice what to do here... I've been on a couple dates with a girl I really like, things have been going great, but now all of the sudden she won't talk to me. Won't answer any phone calls, when I sign online she either sets h...
A. 26 August 2007: It is clear that she doesn't want any contact with you. So, I think you should give up here.
I know it feels awful not to know why she won't talk to you, but, the fact remains that she isn't talking. Let her have her way. If she wants you back... (read in full...)
How weird is this?
Q. Well I have a question about my bf. Well we had been dating for about a month or so and we fell for each other and soon after were having sex. The usual. Whatever. Anyways, one time I was at his house and I was sitting across from him on his couch ...
A. 25 August 2007: The man finds you unbearably hot. That's the explanation to it. Maybe he looked away so you wouldn't think you're a pervert, like jm81690 says, and, also, because he felt sort of embarrased. Don't worry.... (read in full...)
I want to rock his world.
Q. okay so I'm 18 and Ive been with my share of guys not a lot but my boyfriend is 16 and has only been with like 7 girls. hes good in bed but not that experienced with positions. on the other hand I'm known for being slightly kinky although i never do ...
A. 25 August 2007: Go for it!... (read in full...)
Should i be unfaithful or should i just end it?
Q. Hi, I got a bit of a juicy one for ya. I've been going out with my girlfriend a little over a year now, and we've had some really good times, along with a few rough patches. Lately, its been all good, really. However, I'm 22 and she is 25. I have ...
A. 25 August 2007: Pay attention to happytochat. She is telling you all you need to know. Also, what if YOU wanted a serious relationship, and SHE were the one to sow the wild oats? How would you feel? How would you feel to know she entertained the same thoughts ... (read in full...)
I keep losing my erection mix-sex... why?
Q. I'm 20 and healthy. I was a virgin before I met my girlfriend. She is not, she had one partner before me, she said he was awful. Now we have had sex four times recently, on the first night I was in the missionary position. Everything was going ok, ...
A. 25 August 2007: Your first guess is absolutely right: you're worried about something, and that something is "will she think I'm awful, too?"
By the way, any age is good for losing an erection if you have performance anxiety.... (read in full...)
My inner lips are bigger than my outer lips! What will my husband to be think?
Q. i'm a female i think that sth is wrong in my vagina,i mean that i have an inner lip bigger than the other(meaning libia minora).it disturbs me so much and i'm going to get married,will i find any problem in intercourse and how my husband will think ...
A. 25 August 2007: This is normal. I think you're afraid of what your husband will think of you when you're married, and you're projecting that fear on this. But, don't worry.... (read in full...)
I'm confused about whether he is looking for a visa to stay here or genuinly cares about me! Should I wait some years for him to get at the level I am at in this country?
Q. I don't know, maybe I needed this help; I guess that's why I'm writing this question here. My story is that I am a very attractive young female, in my early 30s, single, I've never been married, and I am still looking for my right better-half. I ...
A. 25 August 2007: I do believe you're very pretty and single. Beauty doesn't come with luck, or with an innate ability to relate to the opposite sex. So you can be lava hot and lonely. I also see that you want a kind of relationship that's very unusual these days, ... (read in full...)
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