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Archived questions from:
26 October, 2011 (see latest questions)
(More questions from October, 2011)
Dear Cupid: Relationship help and advice | | |
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Am I jealous? Or wrong to feel this way? She took me shopping to find a present for her ex!
This question has
4 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
26-29 -
So, i'm in an AMAZING relationship with my girlfriend. She makes me happier than anything in the world. However, i get so upset about certain things. For example, she speaks about her ex alot. Like, "once we went to this place and it was great!". And it kind of upsets me ever...
(295 words) Why the sudden change in my wife with sex?
This question has
8 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
51-59 -
My wife made me beg her for sex for 13 years. I went out of town a couple of weeks ago for the weekend and ever since I got back that's all she wants to do now...
(37 words) Nearly 25, rare culture, education, job, what do I do?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
Hi, I recently had my 24 y/o bday a few months ago (I’m female). I have been feeling a bit down off/on since (realization I’m nearly 25) and not anywhere I expected to be. I’m just now finishing an Associates. Due to cultural reasons, my family still dictates a lot of m...
(1295 words) What do women feel when they are horny?
This question has
8 answers
- newest was posted
4771 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
hi !! if a boy or man gets horny he gets a erection !! what a girl or women feels when they are sexually aroused !! hope u wil answer my question ????...
(33 words) I do have the confidence to ask a girl out. But do you think I sound likable to girls?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4802 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
I am very nice, really cool, strong, tough, funny, loyal, really sweet, a caring guy. I do have the confidence enough to ask out a girl. I'm not trying to rush in these things, when ever I meet a pretty girl I just smile and be nice. When I had my first crush she seem...
(170 words) Spiders? Heights? I have a Phobia of statues! Any solutions or people with my Statues phobia?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4803 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
26-29 -
Oh hey its me again! Just an odd little qeustion, i have automonophobia and i was just updating my profile and wondered "hmmm i wonder if anyone else has it." So i thought id ask some of you lovely lot and wheather anyone has it. For those of you...
(438 words) Husband cannot have sex and its very difficult for me living like this!
This question has
3 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
-
What would you do, if your husband would never want sex with you for years, and you don't know why. My husband stopped looking at me, and touching me. He also wont get an erection, when we tried sex, what was not for a long time. Doctor says he is in perfect health. Psychol...
(125 words) I took him to the clinic because I thought something was wrong with him sexually and now he wont talk to me!
This question has
9 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
Hi Agony Aunts and Uncles. Okay i've been here before, asking a few questions, and i got wonderful and useful feedback. So now i'm back...same guy...different situation. Okay, so today, i wanted to take him, well the both of us to the clinic because something unusual with ...
(404 words) Two guys. Which one? how can I tell the other guy that I cannot talk to him anymore without hurting him and myself?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
Okay so this may take a while. I am 18 years old and I have two guys who I have a lot of feelings for and at the moment I need to decide on one because I do not want to hurt them and date both at the same time. My first guy, (I will call him sprite)has been my first love sin...
(401 words) My SOS (someone special) has a girlfriend!! Move on, or wait it out?
This question has
11 answers
- newest was posted
4798 days ago
26 October 2011 (?)
age
41-50 -
So, I am very attracted to this guy that works for my Dad. Five weeks ago, we started talking. I think he is absolutely amazing. He is everything I think I want in a man. He is absolutely adorable, charming, and very sweet. He is just as attracted to me. He says that I am ...
(261 words) If he said no, why did he turn me down?
This question has
1 answer
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
26-29 -
So a few weeks ago, I asked the guy I like if he wanted to go to this Haunted Factory with a group of my friends and myself but he said no :(. I've liked him for months now, and all of my friends and I were pretty sure he liked me back. We have History class together this year ...
(181 words) How do I approach her and what is the best way to ask her out?
This question has
1 answer
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
36-40 -
Hi..first of all i would like to thank you all in advance for your advice..I'm not very good at writing on these things so please bare with me.. So here is my dilemma : there is this really cute girl with whom i would like to go out with..i see her almost everyday in the ...
(186 words) Is it normal to be that wet?
This question has
5 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
when l have sex l become so wet n its so irritating coz den disgusting sounds are heard, this turns me off but he says its a turn on, im just 24 bt feel too loose when im wet and for me to feel him l hv to realy open up... is it me or it happens...
(57 words) My casual LDR is becoming too serious, how do I let her down gently?
This question has
6 answers
- newest was posted
4800 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
Heres the situation: i met this girl on holiday back in the summer and we hit it off straight away. With regards to looks she isnt what i go for, but she makes me laugh and we got on well so i just went with it. We stayed in contact and have visited each other a couple of times ...
(238 words) I wait for her to be online but she rarely contacts me. We love each other. How can I make this Long Distance Relationship work?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
My girlfriend,studies in india,and she is now here back to own country.. Out of thirty five days vacation now only ten days remain. Recently we 've not met much.. Don't know what I shall do. We love each other, but i'm not satisfied with her. She rarely contacts me. I can'...
(126 words) Is my crush from college gay? or bi?
This question has
4 answers
- newest was posted
4800 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
hey there all, and sorry if its long, I am 22 y.o. gay and yes from Cyprus. So you understand that being out of closet means shame for my family and no friends (that is why i am in the closet yet). Anyway, there is a guy at my college that i am interested in. From the fir...
(373 words) Just got married and no sex drive!
This question has
1 answer
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
I just recently got married (about three months ago) and having a huge problem...... I have no sex drive!!!! I want to please my husband but I don't know why im just not into sex.... This is getting really frustrating because he is beings to think that I don't love him or that ...
(102 words) Do couples with different beliefs usually last?
This question has
11 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
My boyfriend and I have been together for three years. We have discussed the topic about marriage and how we could work it out due to the fact that we both are different religions and were raised differently. He is a jehovas witness and I am catholic. The way we were raised is ...
(157 words) My boyfriend is sick and wont go to the doctor, I'm really worried any idea of what he could be sick with?
This question has
3 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
26-29 -
Hey guys this is more of a health question but i cant find any help any were on the internet so i was hopeing you guys could help. Well my boyfriend is 18 and about two days ago he started feeling sick. He will feel really hot and break out in to a sweat and than he will get ...
(149 words) I'm dating someone but had lunch with a guy I used to date casually. Did I do something wrong?
This question has
4 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (?) -
I've been single a while now and have just started going out with this guy. On the third date we decided to start going out together and not date anyone else. He said he's not seen anyone since he started dating me which I trust. Anyway, before the third date I bumped in...
(279 words) I think I blew my chance with this guy if I ever had a chance?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
First, I just started college. I've been in college for nearly two months now. I met this guy. He's the captain of one of the groups that I joined and he's super hot and super duper smart. I really like but I think I blew my chance with him... if I ever had a chance in the ...
(214 words) New girl I'm dating doesn't know how to treat me like my ex. Should I leave her?
This question has
1 answer
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
36-40 -
Im going to try to condense the story as much as possible. I been dating this girl for about a month and a half now. Our relationship is moving very slowly and I'm okay with it. I have some recurring thoughts though. I have a strong feeling that she is not very appreciativ...
(398 words) How do I get him to overcome this frustration and hostility about the commute so that we can really enjoy being together?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
My boyfriend and I have been together (happily) for four years. We have occasional conflict, and we both have our quirks, but after so long together I generally feel like I know ways to effectively defuse my boyfriend's issues in the rare instances when they arise. We decided ...
(869 words) My girlfriend cut off contact with me
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
I've been in a serious relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year now. For the last month or so, things have been a bit hard, we've been fighting and arguing a lot and we haven't had much time together. She acts in a lot of plays and studies a lot during the day, I w...
(258 words) He lied about his uncle being dead so he didn't have to see me
This question has
4 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
I've been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years now. I recently moved to another city for university so seeing each other has been stressful. But we've been planning a big massive holiday together, go away for three-weeks to the beach, just the two of us having amazing times ...
(332 words) Should I keep trying to contact him or just cut him out of my life?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
I've been having trouble with my LDR boyfriend lately. We've been together for 3 years, things haven't been easy lately but I didn't think they were this bad. He was supposed to visit me two-weeks ago for my birthday, but he couldn't because he was too sick. He kept on putti...
(484 words) I broke up with her when she demanded I propose, now she's emotionally blackmailing me!
This question has
14 answers
- newest was posted
4797 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
I've had a very turbulent relationship with my girlfriend of the last 2 years. We've been long distance for most of our relationship, and that's made things tougher. At the start, things were fantastic, we got along perfectly and we couldn't wait to see each other. I would v...
(624 words) I've realised I made a mistake and I was too needy, how do I make things right?
This question has
8 answers
- newest was posted
4803 days ago
26 October 2011 (F) -
Hello agony aunts and uncles. I need your help badly! I broke up with my boyfriend who've I've been with for 6 months about a week ago because we don't live close enough to see each other everyday. He started to ignore my texts and when I'd call he'd pick up and say he was busy ...
(412 words) Should I tell people I'm a virgin when I meet them?
This question has
16 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
I'm 26 and still a virgin. I've not had many boyfriends, i'm quite shy and don't go out much - prefer saving money for holidays and concerts. Whenever i meet someone should I tell them i'm a virgin or not? Thanks...
(47 words) Our problems are stupid, but the situation makes me think she isn't for me.....what should I do?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
36-40 -
I'm unsure of my situation and where I should turn from here. I have been in a long distance relationship where we hardly get to see each other. When we are together it's great and there are hardly any problems, but when apart it's difficult I feel I don't handle it well. ...
(393 words) I have a boyfriend but I think I'm in love with this girl?
This question has
4 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
I'm sorry if this is long but I really, really need advice. I am a 22 year old girl and I have a boyfriend, but I think I'm in love with this girl. She's in one of my classes in school and there's just something about her that.... well I don't really know how to put it. We've...
(444 words) I'm not sure if I can take these rejections anymore! How do I stop myself getting carried away?
This question has
6 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
41-50 -
I know this is probably one of the most common things on here so i apologize if i repaet anyone. Went on a first date the other day and when i asked the girl if she wanted to meet up again, she said she just wanted to be friends. I was very keen, altho i know i didnt show it....
(195 words) Should I confront her husband and let him know what his wife has been doing with me for the last 2 years, or let nature take its course?
This question has
13 answers
- newest was posted
4803 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
51-59 -
well , where do i start , was working with this girl for a couple of years , we became the best of friends , would talk about every thing and any thing , she is married , im single , and has kids , i knew all this before any thing had happened , she is a beautyfull woman , ...
(335 words) Should I continue in this relationship that is currently making me feel depressed, or should I call it quits?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
So this is quite complicated. I have posted questions here as the situation developed, but now I am in real need of some help. My bf and I have been dating rather happily for nearly a year now. I love him very much, he's my best friend, not to mention the guy I gave my virginit...
(342 words) We go through weeks of being really in love, then weeks of feeling really distant! What should we do?
This question has
1 answer
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
Me and my boyfriend a year and a half together, there were always periods of detachment. A week ago we felt really in love. And suddenly now I feel an extraordinary distance. We talked about it and he feels the same. I'm afraid of losing him. I do not know if the right th...
(124 words) Should I meet up with my ex? She has asked for a 'catch up chat'....
This question has
12 answers
- newest was posted
4803 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
51-59 -
My ex wants to meet for coffee and a "catch up chat". Do i meet up or stay away ?....We broke up at xmas last year after a 7 month relationship. I did not see her after i found she was cheating with her best friends husband. I truly was in love with her so deep at the time and...
(227 words) Which guy should I choose? I like them all!
This question has
3 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
26-29 -
Okay so this is going to be long and I am really sorry for it. Okay so over the summer I ended up breaking u with my ex boyfriend, who is really sweet, kind and funny. I broke up with him because I was constantly mad around him and have no idea why. So after about a mon...
(296 words) How can I start showing people who I really am and get to know girls better?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
I've been living with negative thoughts about myself and what other people think about me for a long time now. Heaps of people have said nice things but the negative stuff always overode this. For example, there are girls that have said this and they may not even know me that ...
(174 words) Do you think this is just jealousy? What is going on with my friend?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
36-40 -
hi there peeps, Heres the deal, i feel bad for getting into a relationship and going against my friends advice...my friend now feels hurt. i cant figure out why when she goes against my advice and has lots of off days with me.... I spoke to her the other night about relati...
(384 words) Am I weird for not wanting to sleep around or cheat on my boyfriend? All my friends seem to be doing it!
This question has
10 answers
- newest was posted
4803 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
Why are my friends doing this? am I weird to think is wrong? My friends say am boring and I should change my rules when it comes to guys. I've always been the kind of girl to only kiss a guy or have sex with a guy when we're in a relationship and we're crazy a...
(243 words) I prefer giving rather than receiving! How common is this?
This question has
6 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
Well I got a question, not really a problem. I like to give oral to my girlfriend, more then to get oral. Most of the people I know it's the other way around. anyone of you can recall this? ...
(46 words) How could he lose feelings for me then fall in love with someone else two days later?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
Hi my ex dumped me over the phone last month, I found out from a friend a week later that he was in a relationship with a girl he'd been txting while we were together. I asked him about it and he said they had only been together for a week so he only waited two days to start ...
(107 words) What does he want?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
my ex and I broke up a week and a few days ago but I am already over it because I know it`s better and we are not meant for each other! so my other ex(let`s call him max) and I stayed good friends even during my last relationship. he seemed pretty flirty sometimes, and like he ...
(390 words) Why do men have affairs despite not being ready to leave their partners?
This question has
5 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
41-50 -
Why do married men like to have affairs with other women, though they are by no means ready to leave their legal wives? What is this mentality? Don't they have any fear for the consequence? Don't they feel anything bad about other parties (both wife and mistress)? After having ...
(65 words) What is the longest you have gone without sex whilst in a relationship?
This question has
4 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
-
What is the longest period that someone has gone without sex, While in a relationship. Without a medical reason ...
(19 words) How can I make my wife accept financial help?
This question has
4 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
41-50 -
I am 33 right now and my girlfriend is 23. 8 years back, when she was 15 , I fell in love with her and within 2 weeks she accepted my proposal of being her Boyfriend but I acted more like a friend than boyfriend since she was too young than . I belong from rich family a...
(349 words) Why doesn't he kiss me? Why hasn't he ever taken me on a real date?
This question has
1 answer
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
ive noticed that my boyfriend of about 2 months (we have been fwb for about 6 months before he asked me to be his girl) has started to not kiss me as often as usual. now all i will get is a quick kiss goodbye. he kisses me when we are intimate and whenever i stay the night he ...
(195 words) I'm lost. I hate arguing with my mom. What should I do?
This question has
1 answer
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
To start off with- I don't handle stress well. At all. I am full time college (wanting to take a year break) and full time work. I love my job, its easy, its full time, and its enjoyable. My parents force me to go to college. I want to move out but I dont have credit, whi...
(605 words) She said she used to have a crush on me, so does she still have feelings for me now?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
While passing by my sister mid-conversation, I heard her say that if a girl brings up the fact that she HAD feelings for you (with no disclaimer) it's a fact that she still HAS feelings for you. This brings me to....well me. A friend from years ago have re-connected aft...
(366 words) I like being happy but why do people at school say I'm retarded because I like to laugh?
This question has
7 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
I'm a very happy person that likes to smile and laugh and for most times no reason I can't help it, I love to laugh and smile. At school people be mean to me and say I'm retarded because I like to laugh and smile. They say I shouldnt be happy that much. They call me slow and ...
(91 words) Trying to make a teenage LDR work....
This question has
3 answers
- newest was posted
4803 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
26-29 -
... So I have a girlfriend she lives in Texas and I live in Illinois were both very young and were in an LDR , it's gonna be like that for at least 3 more years . Longer for her I should say since she's graduating next year as to we're I have two more years of hs. But ...
(88 words) Is there any way to get my ex back? I'm not willing to let go of something this powerful.
This question has
3 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
Everyone I know tells me to just move on. Even if my future self went back in time to tell me that it's not worth it, I would still continue. I've always took pride in having no regrets, but I'm at the point when I realize that there are special cases to regret something. ...
(824 words) Why do people complain about their LDR relationships when they are not really that far away from each other?
This question has
6 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
26-29 -
Okay, now I don't know if I'm going off topic or something just tell me why do so many people I know who are in LDRs always complain when there only two or 3 hours apart from each other while me and my gf are 18 hours? It bothers me with a passion because AT LEAST you have the ...
(73 words) How do I tell my boyfriend I shaved off my pubic hair?
This question has
17 answers
- newest was posted
4804 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
Ok, so about a week ago, I was shaving my bikini line, but I angled the razor wrong, and shaved off a patch of pubic hair that made my area, which is usually neat, trimmed, and proper looking, look stupid, so in an effort to try and fix it, I ended up shaving everything off. ...
(171 words) Would it be too much to give her a bracelet?
This question has
4 answers
- newest was posted
4802 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
26-29 -
Thanks in as ace for your help. Yes I am still in school. I really like this girl, she's in all my classes, and I talk to her once in a while. She has been with one of my friends for a week or two. They just broke up like a day ago. I was gonna aske her out before my friend, ...
(166 words) I'm ready to date him, but he's clearly not interested.
This question has
4 answers
- newest was posted
4802 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
Dear Aunts and Uncles, I need some advice on how to move on. I know this is a question that has been asked over and over again, but I really need help breaking out of my fantasy. I am still in love with someone who once loved me. He wanted a relationship but I didn't because...
(267 words) While my husband and I were on a break I met another man, and now my husband wants to know all the sexual details! Is this normal?
No replies yet: Be the first to answer! 26 October 2011 (F)
age
36-40 -
My husband and I have had a roller coaster relationship. We were dating, then we broken up, then we got back together and married a few months after, then during our marriage we took a break a couple times for the same reasons. Anyways, this last time we were separated, ...
(583 words) Why did my friend act weird after making a funny joke?
This question has
5 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
26-29 -
My friend was acting strange today. We were talking about this Halloween costume contest at my school and she was talking about how the winner got a free dinner from the principal. I said something like "Oh, he'd probably take them to McDonald's or something" since our ...
(445 words) We've gone ring shopping -- but he still hasn't proposed! How long is too long to wait?
This question has
12 answers
- newest was posted
4797 days ago
26 October 2011 (?)
age
36-40 -
My boyfriend and I will have been together three years as of this coming February. We have talked about getting married and have even gone to look at rings on multiple occasions. To my knowledge, he has not gone back by himself to look again or make a purchase. I am confident ...
(292 words) How do I make sure I'm not the rebound when her divorce is finalized?
This question has
3 answers
- newest was posted
4803 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
-
Hello everyone! A female acquaintance that I've known for years has been separated from her husband for almost two years and just recently going through the actual divorce. So as of last month we have started seeing more of each other as friends. Though we both know there is ...
(238 words) I cheated on my BF with my FWB!
This question has
5 answers
- newest was posted
4786 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
I have this boyfriend. We have been together for three weeks. We had sex last week and we had planned in waiting longer to do it. But what happens happens. But now he says we can't do it again. But there is this other guy who I have been sleeping with for a while that I started ...
(141 words) My girlfriend said she was to depressed to date me! What does that even mean?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4806 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
30-35 -
So i had my second girlfriend ever and we broke up about....a hour ago. I'm fine with the fact that she broke up with me, I knew she was too good for me anyway so i expected it. its just her excuse for why we are breaking up, apparently I'm a great boyfriend she even used the ...
(201 words) I want to take my new girlfriend to the strip club and watch her touching other girls
This question has
13 answers
- newest was posted
4800 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
36-40 -
I want to take my new girlfriend to a strip club, but am not sure what her reaction will be. For you girls, if you have been dating a guy for a month or so and he askes you if you want to accompany him to a strip club, what would be your reaction? I ask cause in the p...
(247 words) Should I leave my boyfriend to date my friend?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4805 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
OK, I am in panic mode. I'll just fill you in: So, I'm kinda dating this one guy, Alex*. He's really sweet, and he's an awesome person to be around. But I've also got a great guy friend, named Tim*. Tim, whenever I mention Alex, always says "He's so lame! Why are you into ...
(140 words) How do I spark her interest with a message on facebook?
This question has
2 answers
- newest was posted
4806 days ago
26 October 2011 (M)
age
36-40 -
Hiya everyone..thanks in advance for your help. I saw this really cute girl on facebook and sent her a friend request which she accepted. I now want to break the ice by sending her a nice first message(would really like to go out with her)..she lives in my area and we both go ...
(68 words) I always have to text first
This question has
7 answers
- newest was posted
4806 days ago
26 October 2011 (F)
age
30-35 -
if he doesn't text me first what does that mean? i always am the one to start the conversation......
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