I want to live with my uncle that took care of me not my parents
Q. When I was a kid, my parents got into trouble for drugs and was sentenced to prison. My Uncle Justin has always been single with no kids. He was the family member who took me in. All my other uncles, aunts and grandparents couldn't due to ...
A. 27 July 2024: It's not "wrong" but there are more people here than just you. You need to discuss this, firstly with your uncle and then, if he is in agreement to looking after you going forward, with your parents.
Your parents have done their time and, hop... (read in full...)
Do I lend him the money for her engagement ring?
Q. My friend has been with her boyfriend for 5 years. He is a really nice guy - I would not say I know him really well but we have hung out on a fair few occasions and he’s easy to talk too and I know he treats my friend well. He contacted me the...
A. 12 July 2024: Do you lend him the money? HELL NO! Not your relationship, not your ring, not your responsibility.
The fact that he tried to guilt trip you into it would be the final nail in the coffin for me. YOUR money, YOUR choice how you spend it. He is one e... (read in full...)
Her fiancé makes me cringe!
Q. No idea if this is the right place to vent but here we go… I’m not at all keen on my friends fiancé. They’ve been together for 8 years and have 2 kids together- he is in his late 30’s but half the time behaves like a child himself- he does...
A. 12 July 2024: Oh dear. Awkward. Unfortunately we cannot pick who our friends choose to be with. The fact that he keeps tagging along when you and your friend go out would seem to suggest he is either lonely and has no friends of his own, he considers you as a ... (read in full...)
Did I scare this guy off or was he after one thing?
Q. I met this guy online. We had been dating for 4 months. Everything was going almost perfectly fine, he was texting me a lot, calling, setting up dates etc. He said he’d never felt so good with anyone before. He mentioned us being in a relationship ...
A. 23 June 2024: It sounds like you were both looking for very different things from your relationship. You wanted a boyfriend, while he wanted to continue his carefree bachelor lifestyle, holidaying with his friends, while also seeing you when it suited him.
... (read in full...)
Partner picked much older guy for our threesome
Q. Me and my partner of 10 years have been talking about threesome for while. I was under the impression she would pick someone if similar age but she I asked her mentioned a guy from the pub who is 51! She is 27 and in 32. I don’t mind but I’m just ...
A. 12 June 2024: Many a good tune can be played on an old fiddle, as the saying goes. He's had bags more experience than you and maybe she is hoping he can teach you something. ... (read in full...)
Friend will not accept I am unable to visit her this year.
Q. One of my best friends lives in Italy and I tend to fly out once a year for around 10-14 days to see her and her daughter who is my goddaughter - she is 6 years old. I’ve been going over every year (covid aside) for the past 11 years - ...
A. 12 June 2024: That poor child is being set up for disappointment by one of the people she should trust most in her life - her own mother. Your friend should be thoroughly ashamed of herself.
If I were you, I would speak to the child and say something along th... (read in full...)
Me, My Friend, Her Daughter & the awkward Theatre issue!
Q. For my friends birthday I decided to treat her to watch a musical. She loves the theatre but rarely gets to go due to cash being tight. The other issue she has is she suffers from vertigo so cannot be sat up anywhere remotely high (she’s had a cou...
A. 2 June 2024: Wow! Just wow! What a rude and entitled individual.
I don't know what your bond is like with her, outside of this incident, but I would be seriously questioning whether I wanted to be friends with someone who did this to me.
Like the othe... (read in full...)
My sister is blinded by a swindler
Q. Hi i have a bit of a complicated story we are a asian background and very culturally infused. Long story short, my sister is a 12 year gap (she is older), i look up to her as a sister and mom most of the time. I would give ANYTHING for her. she had ...
A. 2 June 2024: While I completely understand your worry about your sister and your instinct to protect her, you cannot force her to see this man for what he is.
Wading in and telling her what's what has obviously backfired completely. My advice, therefor... (read in full...)
My sister is blinded by a swindler
Q. Hi i have a bit of a complicated story we are a asian background and very culturally infused. Long story short, my sister is a 12 year gap (she is older), i look up to her as a sister and mom most of the time. I would give ANYTHING for her. she had ...
A. 2 June 2024: Testing... (read in full...)
New boyfriend won’t tell his old girlfriend about me
Q. Hi there. I’ve got a question. I have been seeing this guy for a few weeks. He’s been out of an 11 year relationship. I have been dating him only three days after his break up. He hasn’t told his ex girlfriend about me. She has called while w...
A. 2 June 2024: Why would someone of your age start dating someone three days after they had ended an 11 year on/off relationship? Does that not sound like insanity to you, especially with a child involved? Were you that desperate to jump in before anyone else?
... (read in full...)
The guy I'm dating doesn't make any effort
Q. i have feelings for this guy but he always lets me down because he has to work or his been sick he says he has feelings for me and knows he should make more of an effort should i give him the benefit of the doubt or should i just move on because ...
A. 29 May 2024: If he really wanted to, he would make it happen. He doesn't like you as much as you like him.
Set him free. He will either miss you and try to win you back by putting in more effort, or he won't, in which case you can walk away and find someone ... (read in full...)
Hes asking for space because his wife is upset about their split
Q. I’ve been seeing a man for a few months who was honest from the onset that he was very recently separated from his wife. We’d been seeing one another for about 3 months when he said he wanted to tell his ex wife that he’d met someone else and knew ...
A. 25 May 2024: "I just feel (rightly or wrongly) that he is not emotionally available to me right now and likely won’t be for a long time. Would it be sensible to tell him that *I* need some space while he figures himself out and if I’m 6/12 months/however long ... (read in full...)
Was what I did that bad?
Q. I was joking around and maybe gossiping but not in a mean way about one of the managers sexuality and I asked a couple coworkers I thought were friendly if they thought she was gay or not. Part of me was being nosey and the other was curious because ...
A. 19 May 2024: A couple of things here.
Firstly, someone else's sexuality is their business and nobody else's - unless they choose to discuss it openly.
Secondly, if you were friends with her, why didn't you broach the subject with her directly, or eve... (read in full...)
I got involved with engaged co worker and made her choose
Q. Hi everyone! Here's my situation: two and a half years ago a new coworker arrived into the company I've been working with for the last 7 years. A couple of weeks after she arrived, she started to flirt with me in a real intense way, I mean, she...
A. 19 May 2024: If you know the date of the wedding, book a week or two away at the same time, so you can honestly say "sorry, can't make it". Or invent a cousin or someone else close in the family who is having a wedding or an important birthday party. I am sure ... (read in full...)
Hes asking for space because his wife is upset about their split
Q. I’ve been seeing a man for a few months who was honest from the onset that he was very recently separated from his wife. We’d been seeing one another for about 3 months when he said he wanted to tell his ex wife that he’d met someone else and knew ...
A. 18 May 2024: Having been in a similar situation years ago, the best advice I can give you is know your worth, hold your head high and walk away. Whether you have a "right" to be upset is neither here nor there; you ARE upset but, realistically, you should have ... (read in full...)
Where and how did things deteriorate to this extent with my brother and his wife?
Q. I got married 8 years ago. My wife is stunning, intelligent and everything that I (or anyone) could ever ask for. My parents were very happy when I introduced her to them, as was my brother. My brother is a couple of years younger to me and was ...
A. 4 May 2024: The thing which struck me about your post is that you think you have done nothing wrong but you refer to your wife as being far superior in "quality" to your SIL. If you say that to complete strangers on a site, then I am willing to bet you (at the ... (read in full...)
He just wants casual sex
Q. i have been sleeping with a guy a few times and he said he does not want a relationship however recently his been kissing me really sensually touching my hair stroking me cuddling staying the night and telling me we have more of a connection than ...
A. 4 May 2024: He's telling you what he thinks you want to hear to keep you at his beck and call. If you don't value yourself, why would anyone else value you? Know your worth and don't undersell yourself.
I went out with a guy for about 12 months who was sepa... (read in full...)
Why did my neighbour lie to me about her experience at the restaurant where I work?
Q. I work part time at a small family run restaurant. As well as working there I often go there for dinner too. The food is amazing and service is wonderful. My neighbor a while back was asking about the restaurant as she and her sister wante...
A. 3 May 2024: Why NOT tell her that you looked at CCTV? She must realize most places have it these days.
Tell her you felt you needed to report her complaints to the manager, who then checked the CCTV as he was concerned that someone should have had a bad expe... (read in full...)
My ex ended things by attacking me verbally
Q. My partner of 4 years just ended things with me, I'm absolutely heartbroken. I thought wee were okay. Yeah wee had problems but always worked through them, he was good with my daughter too. It's not just that he ended it he ended it in the most ...
A. 29 April 2024: As you've chosen to only tell half a story here, then we need to speculate more than usual on what is going on. You don't say what he is accusing you of, what names he is calling you. I have to assume cheating is involved. If you are, indeed, 100% ... (read in full...)
Am I just jealous of his ex?
Q. A long time FWB had open heart surgery recently. I told him I would help with whatever I could when he gets home as he lives alone. His ex-wife stepped in and started filling up his refrigerator, took care of his cat, and has been there every night ...
A. 29 April 2024: I would strongly recommend you open your eyes and wake up to reality. If this man's relationship with his ex-wife is so good that he informs her he is ill and she immediately steps in to look after him, it should drive home to you that you really ... (read in full...)
My aunt embarrassed me in front of everyone at the wedding & I dread facing everyone now!!
Q. Basically what happened we all attended a family members wedding last week. After the wedding breakfast and before the evening doo my aunt decided she wanted to go back to my house to freshen up - she left a change of clothes at my house as I...
A. 13 April 2024: Anyone with any sense of decency is going to think badly of your aunt for embarrassing you in such a way. I think you need to laugh this off with a light-hearted comment like "Well, that will teach you to take my clothes without asking, ha ha".
... (read in full...)
My aunt embarrassed me in front of everyone at the wedding & I dread facing everyone now!!
Q. Basically what happened we all attended a family members wedding last week. After the wedding breakfast and before the evening doo my aunt decided she wanted to go back to my house to freshen up - she left a change of clothes at my house as I...
A. 13 April 2024: Anyone with any sense of decency is going to think badly of your aunt for embarrassing you in such a way. I think you need to laugh this off with a light-hearted comment like "Well, that will teach you to take my clothes without asking, ha ha".
... (read in full...)
My aunt embarrassed me in front of everyone at the wedding & I dread facing everyone now!!
Q. Basically what happened we all attended a family members wedding last week. After the wedding breakfast and before the evening doo my aunt decided she wanted to go back to my house to freshen up - she left a change of clothes at my house as I...
A. 13 April 2024: Test... (read in full...)
Neighbors haven't been supportive since the death of our dog!
Q. We have known our neighbors for 12 years and have always got on well- we both had dogs which we took walking together, plus we’d look after each others dogs from time to time. 4 years ago their dog died, as soon as my husband and found out w...
A. 10 April 2024: I'm so sorry for your sad loss. As a pet owner for most of my life, I know what you are going through and how hard it is.
That said, I prefer to grieve privately and not share my lowest moments with others.
I used to have a friend who would... (read in full...)
I got involved with engaged co worker and made her choose
Q. Hi everyone! Here's my situation: two and a half years ago a new coworker arrived into the company I've been working with for the last 7 years. A couple of weeks after she arrived, she started to flirt with me in a real intense way, I mean, she...
A. 1 April 2024: I bet she's very pretty. Am I right? She uses her looks to get what she wants - a rich fiance and, also, attention from other gullible males, who will never mean anything more to her than an ego boost. She may be pretty on the outside but she is ... (read in full...)
Falling in love unintentionally to my best friend's boyfriend. Title (e.g. My
Q. It's hard to put into words the mess of emotions swirling inside me lately. I've found myself caught in a whirlwind of feelings I never expected to have, all because of my best friend's boyfriend. It started innocently enough. When I first met...
A. 30 March 2024: You can't stop your feelings but you CAN stop yourself acting on them. You CAN distance yourself from this guy, until such time as you manage to get a grip of your emotions.
Put yourself in your best friend's shoes. How would you feel if she was ... (read in full...)
Would it be acceptable for my cousin to walk me down the aisle at my wedding?
Q. When I was 19 years old, I had a one night stand with a friend and ended up pregnant. My parents, who always been judgemental and verbally abusive kicked me out when they found out. My cousin, Justin, who is a year older than me, was always close...
A. 16 March 2024: I'm sorry your parents were not there for you when you needed them most. Some people are just sh!t parents.
Sounds like Justin stepped up when you needed help and, in my view, sounds like the most appropriate person to give you away. He sounds v... (read in full...)
Should I stay or should I go? Help!
Q. Please can I get some career advice - I’m so torn….. I’ve been working for this company in customer services for almost 18 years. I’ve always felt a bit over looked and never really given much opportunity to progress - unfortunately it...
A. 16 March 2024: I have always maintained that, if I am worth a certain amount of money, then that is what you should be paying me. Don't suddenly decide to pay it me when I look to leave.
Six months down the line, the new job won't be so new any longer and, hop... (read in full...)
Crazy man I've never met will not leave me alone
Q. I matched with a guy online. We have FaceTimed one and agreed to meet on date however before the date I changed my mind as he was very pushy and whilst at work he sent me repeated messages despite knowing I was at work asking why I was ignoring him, ...
A. 10 March 2024: The guy sounds insane. Most worryingly, he sounds dangerous. Does he know where you live or work? No idea about other social media but I know on Facebook you can close down your account so only your friends can see it. Don't post on any social media ... (read in full...)
Crazy man I've never met will not leave me alone
Q. I matched with a guy online. We have FaceTimed one and agreed to meet on date however before the date I changed my mind as he was very pushy and whilst at work he sent me repeated messages despite knowing I was at work asking why I was ignoring him, ...
A. 10 March 2024: Test... (read in full...)
Tired of his drama
Q. Hello, I met someone online and we began a relationship. He has moved to where I am and I'm seeing a lot of red flags. I didn't ask him to move here, firstly. He did it on his own. Once he arrived here he got angry that I didn't see him ...
A. 9 March 2024: Why are you still stringing this guy along? You are quite obviously not really interested in him as nobody is too busy for a whole month to see someone. There is nothing good about this relationship from what you have written. He is demanding of ... (read in full...)
How can I make my dream a reality?
Q. I know that this will seem like a silly want to others, but there is something I desperately want. Some women want a baby, some Women want a career, some women want a Gucci bag. I love horses and have always dreamed of learning to ride one, an...
A. 28 February 2024: As someone whose life has revolved around animals, especially horses, for around 40 years, I totally "get" your need to have a horse. Yes, I did use the word "need" because, for some, that it what it is, myself included. After losing 4 old horses in ... (read in full...)
Should I be suspicious of his ex-wife?
Q. Friend with benefits just got out of the hospital for open heart surgery. His ex-wife has been at his house twice a day to cook breakfast and dinner since he came home, though I offered to help. Should I be suspicious that something more i...
A. 17 February 2024: By your own admission, you are merely "friends with benefits", i.e. no ties, no commitments, just sex. If he and his ex wife are on good terms, and especially if they share kids, she is going to want to look after him when he is not well. You know ... (read in full...)
He is controlling and I'm worried that the bad outweighs the good
Q. I was in a relationship for 8 years, 2 children and a wedding booked when I found out he was having an affair with a woman he worked with. We split up but stayed amicable for our children. 3 years down the line and I went through some serious ...
A. 27 January 2024: "I will never find good qualities in a man like he has to offer"??????? Seriously? You really need to take off your rose-coloured spectacles when looking at this individual. He is a cheater (if he's done it once, he is capable of doing it again) and ... (read in full...)
Something just feels off about him
Q. I started seeing this guy at the end of November 2023. On our second date, he asked me about my dating history and he proceeded to tell him his. He told me he still talks daily to his most recent ex and that she is always asking him to get back ...
A. 24 January 2024: MY gut instinct is that he is actually married and pretending to his wife/SO that he works away during the week, when he pops round to see you. Telling you about "dating the other woman" gives him an alibi. ... (read in full...)
Unhappy with hairdresser should I call and tell her or put it on social media?
Q. Been going to the same hairdressers 2 years now, Before that I went to another one for longer. I always get my roots done and a wash and blow dry and it costs £60. The one I go to now is never been as good as the one I went to years ago. This hai...
A. 17 January 2024: You admit the reason you go is because this hairdresser is cheaper than ones where you live. In my experience, it is often the case that you get what you pay for. If you are having to travel 40 minutes to get there (assuming each way by car), that ... (read in full...)
I don't understand what she is doing
Q. My girlfriend dumbed me coz she says I wasn’t serious about her and I was showing her love. I told her that if that’s what she wanted it’s okay. Then I asked her if she has found someone n she said no. That was on Boxing Day. Then I said if they no ...
A. 10 January 2024: It means you are allowing her to live, rent free, inside your head, when all she is doing is yanking your chain and messing with you.
Delete her, block her, move on. ... (read in full...)
My family found out I don't keep the gifts they give me. How do I handle this?
Q. My family (my parents, my brother, my sister-in-law and my sister-in-law's family) are terrible at buying gifts for me. They usually buy me clothes that don't fit, items that I don't need or want and other items that are useless to me. I us...
A. 6 January 2024: First of all, sorry for your loss. The effect of the loss of a loved pet should never be underestimated. They leave a huge hole behind when they leave. I hope you are ok.
Secondly, why not suggest to your family that, going forward, they "cut out... (read in full...)
My family found out I don't keep the gifts they give me. How do I handle this?
Q. My family (my parents, my brother, my sister-in-law and my sister-in-law's family) are terrible at buying gifts for me. They usually buy me clothes that don't fit, items that I don't need or want and other items that are useless to me. I us...
A. 6 January 2024: Test... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's admission of cheating has left me uncertain
Q. Hello My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship about a year. He just admitted because of my work schedule he cheated once with an older woman he met online. He was very casual about it when telling me. I suspected something was up...
A. 24 December 2023: I find it strange that he was "casual" about admitting something like this. Why has he admitted it now? Usually, cheaters don't admit to cheating unless there is a reason, which is usually that they are going to be found out or that they want to end ... (read in full...)
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