A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I want to take my new girlfriend to a strip club, but am not sure what her reaction will be. For you girls, if you have been dating a guy for a month or so and he askes you if you want to accompany him to a strip club, what would be your reaction?I ask cause in the past i have gone with several other girlfriends. i love seeing them get lap dances and do stuff with the girls. Its so hot, i have zero interest ion going with the guys ever again! Also, for a while, we had a group of friends, guys and girls, that would go together, as just one stop on a night out. That stop was fun, and got everyone in an exhilirated mood.So, no girl will ever need to be jealous of me going on my own, or with the guys, and doing stuff. Its just much more fun for me to go with a girlfriend, or a mixed crowd of friends.I want to broach the subject with my new girl. What do you all think? Do you thinks its hot, fun, upsetting or what to go to strip club with a boyfriend? For those who dont like it - would merely being asked the question be a deal breaker for you?
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (1 November 2011):
 A similar matter happened to me.
My boyfriend at the time lied to me of where we were going and we ended up at a strip club with him and his friends. I was extremely pissed off and annoyed that he didn't bother asking me. He knew the answer would have been "no". I have zero interest in watching women wiggle their g-strings in my face. It's not my scene.
IMO, it's nice of you to ask her instead of blindly leading her there, but except her to be dissatisfied with you. No woman likes their boyfriend going to a strip club, much less accompanying them to one. It's just bad taste.
A
female
reader, heart245 +, writes (29 October 2011):
I personally dont think thats a good idea. Actually its quite a horrible one maybe you should think more of the type of girl she is. And even though she is a very open minded person and all ONE MONTH isnt enough for a girl to feel secure with a boy yet. I say evaluate your situation more clearly then maybe after more time (plenty of time) then maybe you may go for it.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (26 October 2011):
 As a former swinger, an attendee of strip clubs, orgies etc... AND a bisexual woman can I just say ewwwwwwwwwwww...
I loved going to the strip clubs with my hubby... but that was the key he was my hubby. if a boyfriend of one month asked me to go, and then wanted me to touch other women, he'd be in big trouble with me.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 October 2011):
 I would honestly dump you in a NY minute.
One month? Yeah, you'd be gone.
Who knows what you might want me to do, after two months or three.....
NOW if SHE had expressed interest in, it could be something to talk about and plan for once the relationship is established.
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A
female
reader, celtic_tiger  +, writes (26 October 2011):
 I think you may just have an obsession with lesbian porn.
This is not real life.
The majority of women are not excited by this and in fact find it a total turn off - we do not want to be pawed by another woman.... urgh. The thought actually makes me feel rather ill.
How would you react if she suggested instead you go to a gay male strip club, so she could watch you be given a male lap dance? Would you agree?
Personally, if a man asked me to do this, for his own pleasure, he wouldn't be my boyfriend for much longer.
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A
male
reader, JustHelpinAgain  +, writes (26 October 2011):
This is wierd. Do you fancy touching men?
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (26 October 2011):
 So the scenario is that you and I have been together for nothing more than a month. Relationship is still fresh, and you're still in the period where I am getting to know you and learn about you.
Then you come and tell me you want to go to a strip-club with me because you think it's so hot when strippers give your girlfriends lap-dances.
You know what? That would classify you as a jerk. Not only are you saying that you want me to give you free porn (you might as well have asked for a full on lesbian session and a camera crew), you are also putting me in a box together with past girlfriends you have had who have done this or that with you.
Here's the thing: new girlfriends want to experience NEW things with you. New girlfriend do not, under any circumstance, want to be a replacement for whatever girl you had in the past, where you will do to the new one exactly what you did to the old one. I mean come on, are you interested in ME as a person, or are you interested in any woman who willingly will be your girlfriend and go to strip-clubs? That's the difference.
IF, and only IF, the girl you are with already DOES enjoy such activities, only then can you take her along. If you are unsure about whether or not she's interested in this type of thing then I suggest you leave it be. I don't care how hot you think it is, no girl will find it flattering that you want to take her and do things that you had your past girlfriend do, just so YOU can feel great about it.
You asked for an honest opinion, and there you have it. Now, if you absolutely want to bring her you must not let her find out you have often taken past girlfriend to do this. You must also ask her first how she feels about strip-clubs and if that's something she'd be interested in going with you to. But I am scared she will blow your cover pretty fast and it'll end up in a mess.
If you like the girl above the lesbian-action, then ditch the strip-club idea unless it naturally happens. Try to discover something new with your new girlfriend instead of repeating old patterns.
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A
female
reader, Claraw1  +, writes (26 October 2011):
 My answer would be no and if he wanted to go by himself feel free, but I wouldn't be going there at all. I know most of my female friends would feel the same, a couple of the others would be all for it. I agree though that if you have been together for only a month or so it is way too early for this to be brought up. If you do asked be prepared for the answer to be no.
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A
female
reader, DanceInTheDark +, writes (26 October 2011):
 Upsetting. I'd be jealous and upset that my boyfriend even wanted to go.
Two. I'm not interested in being given a lap dance by other women.
Yes, just asking would be a deal breaker for me.
Would you want to go a male strip club with your girlfriend and do stuff with the guys? Why should you expect her to want to do things with other girls?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2011): Well, I'm a married woman, 23, and I wouldn't care for the idea of going to a strip club. But if I were to ever try going, my husband would be the person I would want to go with. I wouldn't feel comfortable going with anyone else. It's really hard for me to imagine that, though, because he doesn't like strip clubs, either. They're not his cup of tea. But if he were to ever want to start going for some reason, I wouldn't view it as a "dealbreaker" because I think it's extremely controlling to tell another person what they can/can't do, where they can/can't go, etc. I mean, how wrong does it sound to say "you can't do this or I'll leave you". That's ridiculous.
Anyway, I say go ahead and ask your girlfriend about it, but if she says no, don't push it any further. You can't force her to want to go anymore than she can force you to want to quit going.
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A
female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (26 October 2011):
 You've only been dating for ONE MONTH. Please wait a little longer for her to feel a little more secure, and so both of you can actually get to know each other better.
In a few more months, I think you'll know her well enough that you'll know what her reaction will be.
Remember, if you have to ask a stranger what your girlfriend will think, you need to take a look at why you don't know.
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A
female
reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (26 October 2011):
 I can tell you right now, touching female strippers is not a fantasy for the majority of the female population. It may be your personal turn-on, but it's almost a guarantee that she won't get her panties in a bunch over that. If a guy I dated asked me to go to a strip club after a month of dating, I'd conclude he is immature and not interested in a real relationship.
It's too early in the game to bring this up. You should be leading with your romantic foot and getting to know her as a person. Dating shouldn't be about trying to fulfill your own selfish girl on girl fantasies.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2011): I'm bisexual.. That would be the time of my life.
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