A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hi my ex dumped me over the phone last month, I found out from a friend a week later that he was in a relationship with a girl he'd been txting while we were together. I asked him about it and he said they had only been together for a week so he only waited two days to start seeing her he says he didn't cheat, but I don't understand how you can loose feelings for someone then fall In love with someone else in two days? I miss him so much I have no idea how to get over him or even if I ever will.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2011): Many people have already checked out of a relationship before they decide to officially end it. They don't wake up one day, out of nowhere, and act on a new thought.
A good comparison would be a job you end up quitting. Most likely, there would be a time period of dissatisfaction leading up to the day you quit and find a new job. In that dissatisfaction period, you would probably find yourself looking for new jobs and wouldn't say anything to your current employer. Many people already have new job lined up before they quit!
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (26 October 2011):
You've more or less answered your own question. He'd been texting this girl while you two were together, so it's clear that any feelings he had for you went away a long time ago, and the feelings he had for her came about a long time ago. Sorry to tell you that. At the very least it seems that he was having an emotional affair. Whether he was physically, cheating, I don't know. To top it off, he dumped you over the phone, which probably shows you what he's really like.
As for getting over him, it's only been a month. It's natural to feel the way you do, and you'll need to take a lot of time getting over all this. What you do need to do is really look at how he treated you, and realize that he was actually quite cruel. In the end, he was setting up another relationship whilst he was with you, and the best he could do was end it over the phone. You're much better off without someone like that, and it would be a real tragedy if you sat there missing someone who was cruel.
Take your time, go out with friends, meet new people and when you're ready, you'll meet someone better. This guy isn't worth your time, and he never was.
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