He and I are quite close. Do you think he's telling me he's leaving his wife?
Q. Married man at work rang my mobile whilst I was at work an he at home; I didn't know he had my number, He was very drunk and told me he needed to hear my voice and he missed me then told me he needed to tell me something. So I asked what? He sai...
A. 10 March 2013: Normally, most guys are straightforward in what they say, but the words of a married man are a different thing entirely.
This guy wants you into bed with him. He'll *say* bad things about his wife. He'll talk about plans to leave her. He'll te... (read in full...)
Sent him an email ending things hoping for a bit of resistance but he accepted it. I am so sad, what do I do now?
Q. Hello I have been involved in a 3 1/2 year relationship. My bf likes to flirt a lot, he is in his mid 40s and in my opinion weak willed. We also work together in the same building and recently on the same floor for a period of time. In this time i...
A. 9 March 2013: Maybe he didn't resist because you broke up by email. Using email or texts to break up is a coward thing to do and shows you didn't care enough about him or the relationship to do it properly face-to-face.
Other than that, he was never going to... (read in full...)
I'm not attracted to bad people who treat me poorly. So why do I keep on attracting women who cheat?
Q. Is there such a thing as ever actually being honest in relationships anymore!?!? Do people actually know what it even means? I stayed friends with my ex after we broke up a few months ago because despite not working out she seemed like a good, ho...
A. 9 March 2013: Hold on a second. If you have a pattern of dating people who are dishonest and cheat on you, then there IS a specific trait that's attracting you. You just might not know what it is, or it may present itself as something different before the "bad" ... (read in full...)
Dating a gynecologist is bothering me!
Q. I've met this guy recently through friends I like him very much. We've been on couple of dates but my problem is that he is a gynecologist! I can't seem to see through that. I cannot imagine what that is like for a young man. It bothers me to think...
A. 8 March 2013: What?!? Have you ever had a pap smear? A gynecological exam is far from "intimate" and involves those spaghetti tong speculums and rubber latex gloves and that massive oversized q-tip. Hardly sex toys!
It is a CLINICAL experience that no one l... (read in full...)
Do men get anxious about heterosexual anal sex?
Q. I am wondering if it is common for men to get anxiety about heterosexual anal sex. I recently had it with my girlfriend for the third time and she was the one who became quite forceful about it. It freaked me out a little at the time. I thought ...
A. 8 March 2013: The answer is much simpler than you think.
You said that this is your third try at anal? That means this is a new thing introduced between the two of you. You're very fortunate, because most women don't like it and never get to the point of... (read in full...)
I overhear people saying 'why is she with him' because I'm just an average guy whereas she is beautiful inside and out, should I ask my girlfriend what she saw in me?
Q. I have been dating this beautiful girl for abt a year now!she's nice,kinda,a well educated woman she's working at a hospital..she's beautiful not only on the outside but also the inside and that's what attracted me to her! But the only thing that ...
A. 8 March 2013: Oh geeze. Leave it to the jealous morons out there who try to prop up their own self-esteem problems by putting down others. Trust me on this, it's their problem, not yours.
As for the whole "what did you see in me" discussion with your girlfrie... (read in full...)
Is it a red flag that my 33 year old boyfriend likes to hang out with a 21 year old girl?
Q. My boyfriend is 33 and I am 27. We have been together for 3+ years and our relationship is pretty strong. But, he befriends people much younger and hangs out with one 21 year girl old in particular. Is this a red flag? He wouldn't cheat, but I ...
A. 6 March 2013: What do you mean, "hang out"? Are they co-workers and he has lunch with her, or does he take her out on dates?
There is nothing wrong with having a platonic female friend, and the age difference isn't all that much. Why are you telling him to n... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is always staring at girls and when I complain he says I'm paraoid!
Q. My boyfriend recently went drinking with friends and came home with pictures of him dancing with girls (dirty dancing). And he claimed he brought them for me coz i did something which made him upset, though he couldnt disclose what. Yesterda...
A. 6 March 2013: You have a much bigger issue than his staring at other women in front of you. That boils down to very bad manners and disrespect for you, but that's not the big problem here.
The big problem, and a complete RED FLAG is his bringing home pictures... (read in full...)
My boyfriend called me a hypocrite for watching porn
Q. So I'm a horn dog. I like sex and enjoy masturbation. My boyfriend is the opposite from me. He enjoys pleasure however does not want to do it often. I tell him I don't want him watching porn, However I watched it yesterday night and he caught me. He ...
A. 6 March 2013: Sorry, but that's the textbook definition of hypocrite. You demand he abstain from porn while you secretly masturbate to it. That's like a guy who's slept with 20 women demanding that he only date a virgin.
This guy is right to be pissed. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend will not perform oral sex and I love it!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for some time now and he doesn't eat my box. He says it's not his thing what should I do???? when that is one of my favorites like almost can't live without it and it's driving me nuts......
A. 5 March 2013: Yeah, that's a sexual compatibility issue. Trust me, if he's absolutely closed-minded to it, there's not much you can do except leave him for someone a lot more inviting of it. And trust me, there are some guys who not only love to do it, but will ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be his rebound!
Q. Rebound or what? I started dating this guy 3 weeks ago and he seems to really care about me he's been with me almost everyday for 2 weeks. Today he got highly pissed because he found out his ex cheated on him and never told him he talked to me about...
A. 5 March 2013: I think someone could be over someone else, yet still become furious knowing that the person who claimed to love you so deeply cheated on you.
It's his ego screaming for attention, so I say give him a little bit of leeway.
HOWEVER, I th... (read in full...)
Boyfriend constantly belittles me during arguments!
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been dating off and on for two years but he seems to belittle me in every arguement we have. I think when Im right in the arguements he feels like thats what he can do to make me feel bad. I love him so much but its getting ...
A. 5 March 2013: "What do I need to say to him to make him understand how i feel?"
How about
"Get the hell out of my life forever and never talk to me again, you useless fraction of a man!"
You've been dating off and on. Get it? Off and on. When you're... (read in full...)
After 5 months he says he's not ready to be a boyfriend and would wind up cheating on me!
Q. sorry this is pretty long but i appreciate you reading. i need your help. i've been seeing this guy for a little over 5 months now but we're not official. when we first met, he had just broken up with his long-term girlfriend and it was still ver...
A. 4 March 2013: Everything can be summed up in your single sentence "I lost my virginity to him". You had the misfortune of losing it to a loser.
Now, not only do you have to get rid of him, you get to deal with those stupid bonding chemicals that often turn sma... (read in full...)
If my girlfriend was fooling around with another girl should I forgive her?
Q. Hey, really don't know what to do, so for the first time in my life am asking a message board for answers. Me and my girlfriend have been together for 2 and half years of bliss! I really couldn't have asked for a kinder sweeter girl, especially...
A. 4 March 2013: Would you be angry if she was fooling around with another man? Of course you would be. Cheating is cheating, and she was cheating! She shouldn't have had intimate contact with another woman any more than she should with another man.
Being... (read in full...)
I made a mistake by cheating and boyfriend met someone. How do I get him back?
Q. Hi all. Two years ago today I was dumped by my ex. We both did things to each other. I accept I made him insecure by constantly flirting with attractive guys when we went out, and by flirting on dating sites (which he always found out about). I did ...
A. 4 March 2013: Something else here -- not only do you want him back, but you want to steal him from his new girl? You hurt him over and over, now you want to hurt his girlfriend in the same way you hurt him.
Nope. You haven't changed.... (read in full...)
I made a mistake by cheating and boyfriend met someone. How do I get him back?
Q. Hi all. Two years ago today I was dumped by my ex. We both did things to each other. I accept I made him insecure by constantly flirting with attractive guys when we went out, and by flirting on dating sites (which he always found out about). I did ...
A. 3 March 2013: Why should he take you back? You abused him in your relationship. He's better off without you. I didn't hear one thing in your post about why you did what you did, why you abused him emotionally, why you were bent on trying to emasculate him, and ... (read in full...)
Everybody knew about my boyfriend's pregnant girlfriend but me!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years and I just recently found out that not only has he been cheating on me for years but the girl is now pregnant. The reason I found out was because a friend of the family told me. When I asked him ...
A. 3 March 2013: There's only one bit of help I can give you, and that's to end everything with this guy, especially if you haven't already had kids with this guy.
That's insurmountable, as he has to be a father to this new kid, meaning you are stuck being re... (read in full...)
He left me standing mid date, with no explaination.
Q. Me and my 30yo boyfriend were hanging out with friends at a coffee shop. He got a phone call (didn't see who it was), went outside to answer it. He never came back. We got there at 9:40pm, he got the call around 10:20. I waited, but my friends w...
A. 3 March 2013: Why are you with him?
Don't waste your time telling him you're hurt. Don't waste your time with him at all. If he's got a habit of flaking out on you, kick him to the curb.
Tell him it's over and to get out of your life once and for all.
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has been reading stories about incest and beastiality. Should I worry?
Q. My boyfriend has been reading stories about incest (father/daughter) and stories about girls having sex with dogs, I don't know what this means or if I should even worry about it. Help?...
A. 2 March 2013: It's specifically Father/Daughter porn, and people wish they could have seen warning signs that the man they're living with is a child molester, as most of them look just like you or me.
I'm just saying, it's a rare thing to have it revealed... (read in full...)
I've been dreaming of this woman since 1974. Should I look for her?
Q. I´ve been in love with Tessie since 1974, Tessie and I began a few moths relationship, we broke, after 7 years, we started a new relation, By then I was married man but somehow Tessie and I kept together for 5 years. In 1989 I got sick with can...
A. 2 March 2013: Yeah, it sure does sound more likely that when you got sick in 1989, Tessie got away from YOU, not the other way around.
Why wouldn't you let Tessie take care of you? Why leave her to let your wife do it? Doesn't make sense. You could have div... (read in full...)
Is my husband's honesty admirable or despicable?
Q. My husband told me that he loves me, but he's not attracted to my body, anymore. He said he just wants to be honest with me. He really isn't trying to be mean, and he's not saying it in a demeaning way. Specifically, he wants me to tone my body....
A. 2 March 2013: Wow, seriously? He said that to you? That makes me speechless to be honest. Where do I begin on this one?
We all grow older. No matter how we take care of ourselves, or try and fight the effects of time, be it cosmetic surgery, hair replacem... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is terrible in bed - will he ever get better?
Q. Hello! So, I am starting a serious relationship for the first time, and I want it to work. I am, however, very unsatisfied with my boyfriend's sexual performance, and I need some good help because I tried what I could and that didn't work. I will e...
A. 2 March 2013: Yes! Keep posting here over and over! I like to hear follow-ups, and I'm curious about how your story goes with this guy. With all of the posts on here that get my blood boiling or make me upset, this one is adorable and makes me smile!
The f... (read in full...)
I've been dreaming of this woman since 1974. Should I look for her?
Q. I´ve been in love with Tessie since 1974, Tessie and I began a few moths relationship, we broke, after 7 years, we started a new relation, By then I was married man but somehow Tessie and I kept together for 5 years. In 1989 I got sick with can...
A. 2 March 2013: I have a very simple question for you:
In 1989 when you got sick with cancer, and through all of your health issues, who took care of you? Was it Tessie, or was it your wife?
It's one thing to smile at a memory of a past love. Most of us do i... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is terrible in bed - will he ever get better?
Q. Hello! So, I am starting a serious relationship for the first time, and I want it to work. I am, however, very unsatisfied with my boyfriend's sexual performance, and I need some good help because I tried what I could and that didn't work. I will e...
A. 1 March 2013: I'm not a guy, but my husband was a virgin when I met him, and I had to smile at what you said. I'm actually the first woman he ever kissed, and trust me, there was a lot of laughing at first.
On our wedding night (he wanted to wait until ma... (read in full...)
I need help overcoming my addiction to prostitutes
Q. Hi I've been seeing prostitutes for 15 years. It started off out of boredom. I have always had a strong sexual appetite, I started masturbating from a young age. Every time I use a prostitute I beat myself up about it. At first I had protecte...
A. 1 March 2013: Everyone else is going to talk about your sex addiction, and their advice is good. My advice is supplementary, but nevertheless, extremely important to your case.
Check this out:
http://www.gu... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has been reading stories about incest and beastiality. Should I worry?
Q. My boyfriend has been reading stories about incest (father/daughter) and stories about girls having sex with dogs, I don't know what this means or if I should even worry about it. Help?...
A. 1 March 2013: If I were you, I'd be worried. Incest usually fills people with revulsion and horror, and bestiality is just disgusting. There are way too many instances of child molestation in the world, and it would be awful if you married him, had a child with ... (read in full...)
Can I find a virgin woman?
Q. Hai, am 27 year old virgin guy, am a christian and i do not believe in premarital sex. Many women dont believe me because am quite succesful and goodlooking, my question is, is it wrong for me to ask a woman if shes a virgin? Am looking for a ...
A. 1 March 2013: Of course you can find a woman who is a virgin, especially if you are a devout Christian. If you go to church regularly, you can meet up with women who share your convictions.
And you've got respect from me big time for being one yourself... (read in full...)
My boyfriend asked for a key to my apartment? Should I give it to him?
Q. My boyfriend asked for a key to my apartment. We visit each other's places often and sometimes he sleeps over or I sleep over at his place. We have been dating for 3 months. I do not want to live with him or have him live with me. He asked if ...
A. 28 February 2013: Maybe it's my different temperament, but to me, his asking for a key is a major red flag to me.
If you've only been together for three months, you don't really know the guy. At the three month point, many relationships are just making a decision... (read in full...)
Girl flirting with my boyfriend at party, and then friending him on Facebook.
Q. My boyfriend and I were at a birthday party at a house a few weeks ago. We met a mutual friend of one of the birthday girls for the first time, a female about our age. At first she seemed really nice and we were both chatting with her. Then ...
A. 27 February 2013: You are far from secure, either with yourself or with your relationship with your boyfriend. If you were, and your relationship were truly solid, the actions of this other woman wouldn't raise your blood pressure by one single bit.
Your issue is... (read in full...)
My g/f likes to flash her guy friends just for fun?
Q. My gf likes to flash her guy friends just for fun I don't care but she continueisly says that she feels bad and that she dosent want to do anything that we as a couple don't agree on she asked me if I mind and even though I say I don't care she says ...
A. 27 February 2013: This has become an interesting debate.
Let me ask the married and partnered female aunts a question here:
Would you ladies on here want a woman, stranger or acquaintance, to flash her breasts at your husband or boyfriend? Likewise, you me... (read in full...)
I've recently come out and I'm attracted to my friend. Do I tell her?
Q. I am quite tom boyish and have become very attracted to my close girl mate. She is very much into men but I can't help my feelings for her. This is very new to me as my relationships have always been with men and recently I have come out to some ...
A. 27 February 2013: Listen to Honeypie here on this one.
You endanger your friendship by overwhelming her with all of this, especially if she is into men.
However, take the first baby step and come out to her. That's all, I repeat *all* you should tell her ... (read in full...)
Why does everyone think that men and women can't be friends?
Q. Ok, so I'm just wondering... I have seen A LOT of posts involving opposite sex friendships... and I have seen A LOT of answers that claim guys and girls can't be friends ... my question is this: films aside, where has this ridiculous idea come from? ...
A. 27 February 2013: You don't know if his wife knows??
You can't argue the validity of opposite sex friendships using yours as an example if yours is missing the most vital of components -- that being a fully informed and happily consenting spouse.... (read in full...)
My g/f likes to flash her guy friends just for fun?
Q. My gf likes to flash her guy friends just for fun I don't care but she continueisly says that she feels bad and that she dosent want to do anything that we as a couple don't agree on she asked me if I mind and even though I say I don't care she says ...
A. 27 February 2013: Uhh, why is it that when a girl flashes random guys, it's fun and arousing, but when a guy does it, he's registered as a sex offender??
That's sexually offensive, to be honest. It's irresponsible and immature. There's something seriousl... (read in full...)
Why does everyone think that men and women can't be friends?
Q. Ok, so I'm just wondering... I have seen A LOT of posts involving opposite sex friendships... and I have seen A LOT of answers that claim guys and girls can't be friends ... my question is this: films aside, where has this ridiculous idea come from? ...
A. 26 February 2013: Of course it's possible, but it's the exception, not the norm. All too often, what starts as platonic ends with one or both people developing feelings for each other. What happens then?
If his wife is okay with you in his life, then it works. ... (read in full...)
He leaves me goes to ex..rinse, repeat. How can I trust him?
Q. i feel so lost. i was married and very unhappy, i met a guy at work and at first site it was as if i stopped breathing, i instantly loved him! butterflies fireworks everything! it signified the end of my.marriage as i felt if i was in love with my ...
A. 26 February 2013: You can't trust him. He'll return to his ex or cheat on you with someone new. It will never stop until you get him out of your life.
Why do you think your housemate is leaving? Because she sees the same thing I do. You need someone professi... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's female friend is always at his house and no one cares about my feelings
Q. Every week for the past 3 months, whenever I go to my boyfriend's mums there is this girl there. This girl has openly admitted to liking my boyfriend for the past 5 years and purely doesn't like me on the bases I'm going out with him and she isn't. ...
A. 26 February 2013: It's pretty obvious here that your boyfriend's mom wants this girl to be with your boyfriend, not you. That sucks, and it's almost like an arranged marriage of sorts.
You can't do anything about it, and the deck is stacked against you as far as t... (read in full...)
Girlfriend stood me up on valentines day and now says she's too busy to make up the date?
Q. my girlfriend stood me up on valentines day saying she needed to study for exams. i had made some pretty big plans and felt really horrible. at first I didn't tell her about this but she realized something was bothering me so i finally told her...
A. 26 February 2013: Sorry to say this, but I think she's sending you the message that you don't fit in her life. She's taking the coward's approach in blowing you off and hoping you take a subtle hint in order to just fade out of her life rather than being the bad guy ... (read in full...)
Is he bored with me? I caught him yanking off in bed next to me!
Q. I have been in a relationship with a man who was married for over 20 years. The last 7 years it was a sexless marriage. We happen to have sex very often but there are times where I find porn on his phone and have caught him a few times masturbati...
A. 26 February 2013: That guy picked up a nasty porn addiction.
It's one thing to have porn..it's another thing to be addicted to the point where it's interfering with an actual relationship. I'd say having to use it to stimulate himself for sex with you is a pretty... (read in full...)
52 year old male with 3 late teen daughters seeing a 20 year old woman?
Q. I'm 52 and divorced with three daughters ages 21, 18, 17. I have been seeing a 20 year old woman. My daughters think this is very bad. The 20 year old wants me to choose her over my daughters. I broke it off with the 20 year old because of my ...
A. 26 February 2013: I've gotta state the obvious here -- what the hell is wrong with women in their 50's?? Why do you have to search for women 20-30 years younger than you are for kicks?? The stigma of 50-something women will never be directly or indirectly applauded ... (read in full...)
Has a partner ever said they wouldn't watch porn but then do it anyways?
Q. Has anyone ever had a relationship where they have told their partner at the beginning they don't want porn in the relationship and their partner has accepted but done it anyway? I am worried this is going happen to me, I don't want to give myself ...
A. 26 February 2013: Do you know what "perving" is??
Perversion is deviant and destructive sexual behavior. Pedophilia, bestiality, rape, snuff films, child abuse and torture, incest, stalking/arousal through terror, involuntary sexual slavery, genital mutilati... (read in full...)
Married friend is mad at me because I told him I won't get messed up with a married guy.
Q. Hi everyone. I will make a long story short. I am friends with a married guy. We work together. We are attracted to each other but have not crossed the line. Recently I opened up to him that I was involved with a guy who was married once and...
A. 26 February 2013: I'm going to tell you this very directly:
Within 6 months, you will be in bed with this married man.
Don't delude yourself here. If you've already slept with a married man and haven't learned your lesson by now that you can't play with fire, ... (read in full...)
52 year old male with 3 late teen daughters seeing a 20 year old woman?
Q. I'm 52 and divorced with three daughters ages 21, 18, 17. I have been seeing a 20 year old woman. My daughters think this is very bad. The 20 year old wants me to choose her over my daughters. I broke it off with the 20 year old because of my ...
A. 26 February 2013: She's already sleeping with someone else? Already? She's either unbelievably easy or she never stopped sleeping with other people. You might want to get yourself tested, because sleeping around like that has risks involved. You had only been ... (read in full...)
52 year old male with 3 late teen daughters seeing a 20 year old woman?
Q. I'm 52 and divorced with three daughters ages 21, 18, 17. I have been seeing a 20 year old woman. My daughters think this is very bad. The 20 year old wants me to choose her over my daughters. I broke it off with the 20 year old because of my ...
A. 25 February 2013: Wow, strange. She chooses you simply because she saw an older man in a porn video? Maybe Cerberus did hit pretty close with his "fetish" comments.
But if it's a fetish thing for her, and you said "It is not like the 20 year old would ever be ... (read in full...)
52 year old male with 3 late teen daughters seeing a 20 year old woman?
Q. I'm 52 and divorced with three daughters ages 21, 18, 17. I have been seeing a 20 year old woman. My daughters think this is very bad. The 20 year old wants me to choose her over my daughters. I broke it off with the 20 year old because of my ...
A. 24 February 2013: Your daughters didn't give you the ultimatum. They merely gave you their opinion.
The 20-year old woman you were seeing actually suggested you cut off your daughters for her, which in my opinion is completely hideous. You were right to drop her... (read in full...)
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