A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my 30yo boyfriend were hanging out with friends at a coffee shop. He got a phone call (didn't see who it was), went outside to answer it. He never came back.We got there at 9:40pm, he got the call around 10:20. I waited, but my friends wanted to leave and I wouldn't sit alone, so by 11pm I left. I quickly looked around the square were the coffee shop is, no signs of him. I called his cellphone over 5 times, it rings but he doesn't answer.Am I right to be mad? He has this habit of standing me up (usually by oversleeping), but leaving mid-date without warning is a new.If he had to leave, he could AT LEAST go back to the coffee shop and tell me. Nobody's dying if you spend 30 seconds warning your girlfriend that something came up.Should I text him saying I'm very hurt or just wait for him to call?
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female
reader, when nothing goes right go left  +, writes (3 March 2013):
 It understandable that your mad because you could have waited for him and he should have at least sent you a text. So you should tell him how you feel whilst the feelings are still raw otherwise you might be more likely to let him get away with it.
Hope this helps.
A
female
reader, sarcy24 +, writes (3 March 2013):
 I was with a guy for years who would stand me up and just disappear. His favourite was to go to the loo and then just go home leaving me sitting like an idiot. Twice I sent men into the toilets incase he'd collapsed but he had always gone. He told me that it always happened when he had been drinking that he felt tired and then he just wanted to go home. The worst was when he promised to take me to Rome. Gave me the ticket and told me to wait for him in the lounge. He didn't turn up and my bag had to be off loaded. I nearly died with horror and shame.
I am not sure why this is happening to you with this guy but I would say from experience to call it a day. I don't think that I would even bother to check that he is ok - I would just let him go. It is so ill mannered and rude and you should not have to put up with it. The end came for me after the Rome trip because I suffered such severe humiliation and I received no apology. I can understand how upset you are and if this is in a long line of being stood up then it is time to call it a day.
An interesting aftermath for me was that about ten years later he asked me out again and as I had always liked him I said yes but told him if he wasn't on time I would not wait. We arranged to meet at 8pm at Covent Garden tube station. I was there at 7.50pm - I waited till 8pm, nothing and until 8.10pm incase the traffic was bad, still nothing so I went home. No phone call - no nothing - nothing changes! The end.
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A
female
reader, llifton  +, writes (3 March 2013):
 you may want to make sure he's okay first and foremost. that really rather alarms me. i mean, is it possible that he had an emergency?
if you can rule out emergency, i'd be PISSED. i would NOT stay with a person like that. that's the most rude, obnoxious thing i can imagine doing. wow. dump him.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (3 March 2013):
 I agree with the others. If he did not have a history of standing you up before, I would have said " Call him, something serious must have happened, something so shocking or urgent that made him forget to come and tell you he was leaving ". But, seen the record he has, probably he is just a jerk. You are sort of an afterthought to him, he does what he wants when he wants and if you are not happy tough luck for you.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (3 March 2013):
Wow. What a jerk. Unless it was a situation where the time spent telling you would have led to someone's death, there is no excuse for what he did.
My guess is that anyone that would do this to someone else makes a pretty poor significant other. If that's the case I don't see a reason to ever call him again.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (3 March 2013):
 Why are you with him?
Don't waste your time telling him you're hurt. Don't waste your time with him at all. If he's got a habit of flaking out on you, kick him to the curb.
Tell him it's over and to get out of your life once and for all.
You're wasting your time with him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2013): Please don't stay with this person...the heartache he is causing is just going to continue. He lacks basic consideration for other people and that is a bad character sign. This man is destined to fail in life because that is the number one rule for running a business or being top dog in a company: always be thoughtful because it leaves the biggest impression on people.
If you are not going to leave him then I beg you to do the same thing to him and see what his reaction is, it may be good for him.
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