A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Married man at work rang my mobile whilst I was at work an he at home; I didn't know he had my number, He was very drunk and told me he needed to hear my voice and he missed me then told me he needed to tell me something.So I asked what?He said wait till Monday.So I asked to give me a clue and he said its in relation to his wife, then that was it! What do you think it could be?He and I, we're quite close and I know he's been having trouble at home! Do you think he's telling me he's leaving his wife?
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (11 March 2013):
 Right... and it was important that he tell YOU first, about him and his wifey splitting up.... Doesn't that sound even a LITTLE BIT suspicious to you??????AND, you and he will be/become "friends"... as you insist.... If every fling that started out between men and women who are "just friends" remained goings-on just "between friends"...then there would be no/few divorces based upon infidelity....HOWEVER, you are living YOUR life.... and it's really none of my affairs.... OR the affairs of the other Aunts and Uncles on here who MAY - just MAY - suggest that you are now playing with matches in the presence of a pool of gasoline....Good luck....
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2013): I'm the OP
Well I met him and he did tell me him and his wife are splitting up!
I'm not involved with him and hope I didn't give that impression, I just wanted some advice of what you guys thought it could be!
Well he remembered the phone call, and like a friend I've told him ill be there if he needs me but told him i am a FRIEND!
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (11 March 2013):
It's Monday. What happened?
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (10 March 2013):
 Messing about with married men is a waste of time and could really hurt you emotionally. Who knows what he has to say but I expect none of it will be good or healthy.
Go easy darling, this will probably back fire big time!!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2013): I'm a RMN (mental health nurse) and yes some people can be so intoxicated that they have difficulty in remembering what they have said but to get to that point.. They would need to be slurring their words would not have a clue how to work a mobile phone or be able to talk into one and with the cherry on the top be falling into a black out .. Your guy I feel is playing games. He's married lets start there so this getting close thing really needs to stop, don't you agree? He wants. What he wants... And he playing whatever card to get it.. That be a roll in the hay. He may say nothing on Monday or he may tell a huge porkie pie. If I was you I would wait until it was well known at work he was separated living in his own home and I would be prepared if I thought this was going to be long term to wait until that time period was up. I would also advise him of the same .. But first of I would tell him, I would not be playing bed hopper until he first of tried to work things through with his wife.If you were his wife? Wouldn't you want the same.Ps if you read so confused her hubby was well intoxicated I bet she found it extremely difficult to even hold a convo or even get anything sensible out hubby mouth during these times . Your guy was drunk but not so drunk he didn't know what he was planning . Take care..
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (10 March 2013):
 Normally, most guys are straightforward in what they say, but the words of a married man are a different thing entirely.
This guy wants you into bed with him. He'll *say* bad things about his wife. He'll talk about plans to leave her. He'll tell you a sob story about how things aren't good at home. He'll put his best face on as he softens you up.
A cheater's words are worthless. Look at how he is treating his wife by how he talks about her. Look at how he gets drunk and calls other women.
You can't be platonic friends with him as long as there are feelings involved, because it'll all end up with you in bed with a married man. And that is disgusting.
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A
female
reader, R1 +, writes (10 March 2013):
 I imagine you will find out on Monday, if he doesn't remember the phone call you can assume it was just a drunken moment and he's not leaving his wife. What's the rest of the story here?
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (10 March 2013):
You can keep your hopes up until you and he speak on Monday.... and then you will learn some few things from amongst these:
1. He gets drunk and does stupid things (Like, call you),
2. He is dumb enough to try to tempt you with some sort of not-so-cute "teaser"... and,
3. You are crazy enough to conjecture that whatever he said (his tease) will fit right in with your schoolgirl hope that he is going to tell you that he's leaving his wife to be with you..... and,
4. ALL of the above is absolute ludicrousy.... and you have been baited in.... and seem to actually want some combination of 1 through 3 to be true....
Are you ready to start some sort of "relationship" with a guy who would get drunk? ...and bait a naive woman?
Please reconsider if you wouldn't prefer to remove this submittal from this site and forget that you ever dreamed it, or posted it....
Good luck...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2013): Go find a man who is not attached...don't hold out for hope that he's leaving his wife....don't read into anything a drunk person says...if he's making inappropriate phone calls to other women, he is not an honorable man by any stretch. Have respect for yourself and keep things at a distance with this guy....he is playing with fire and you are not helping the situation. He should be wanting to hear his WIFE'S voice, not another women's. Why would you want a guy in your life like that? Something stopped him when you asked about his wife... the end. Hopefully, it will blow over, be forgotten and that's the end of it. Don't encourage anything else.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2013): Someone drunk-dialed you and you want to know if he's leaving his wife for you? Do yourself a favor and raise your standards. You don't have to rummage through the garbage to find a man. Give that poor woman all your sympathies and thank God he isn't your husband!RUN!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2013): Someone drunk-dialed you and you want to know if he's leaving his wife for you? You're a co-conspirator in a ruined marriage, if he is. Do yourself a favor and raise your standards. You don't have to rummage through the garbage to find a man. Give that poor woman all your sympathies and thank God he isn't your husband!RUN!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2013): The man was drunk, I doubt he'll remember what it was by monday lol
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 March 2013):
 he may not remember the phone call come monday.
My husband is a drunk (as he says alcoholics go to meetings) he drinks so much he forgets things he says or does. i know because I ask him, I tape him, and I show him and he's so embarrassed by it... and when he's very drunk I really don't like him... perhaps your friend's wife was vocal in her dislike of his drunken state.... and she "threw him out"
that could pass when he's sober... especially if he's not a regular drinker.
are you asking because you want more with this married man than just being friends? that's a sure fire way to get hurt. even if he leaves his wife right now you should wait at least a year after he leaves to have more than a friendship with this guy.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (10 March 2013):
 The alcohol lowered his inhibitions. He was feeling nostalgic and maybe even guilty that he cannot be the man he thinks you need.
He's married.
Come Monday he may be too embarassed to even remember what he implied in his drunken phone call.
He may well be having some problems at home and the alchol gave me some courage to talk to someone other than his wife.
He and his wife have some issues to work through. And the fact that he is still with his wife is the clue to where his ultimate loyalty lies, even if sometimes he would like to flee his marriage.
If he does ever leave his wife his next partner will have to put up with his drinking and his philandering. He sounds a challenge as a husband.
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