A
female
age
30-35,
*ouise12
writes:I've been with my boyfriend for about four months now. We started having sex about two months ago. The sex just isn't good. It has gradually gotten better but it's still not where it should be. I don't think it's him, I think it's me. I'm just not sexually attracted to him as much as I thought. His body and personality is on point. But his face just really isnt up to par. The way he carried himself and his personality was the selling factor in us getting together. I think the issue boils down to our lack of time together. He works three jobs. I have school as well as a job. We see each other about once a week, and I just don't think thats enough. I've mentioned this concern to him and he apologizes. I felt a little selfish afterwards because it's not like he can just miss work. I'm hoping that the more time we spend together, the more attraction that would develope. I want to stress that my boyfriend is so nice. The word that best decribes him is genuine. The thing that is also shocking is that if another guy came along that I was attracted to I would leave him. I honestly believe that he's just a "now" type of boyfriend and definately not a now and later type. I really dont know what to do. I care about him and even at times love him. I just don't know what to do and I need some major advice. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, janey24  +, writes (2 December 2010):
hi there, im sorry to hear you are experiencing these feelings. I must confess that I am in exactly the same situation with my boyfriend of 7 months. I think it is ok to want to see someone more than once a week and sometimes with such gaps between seeing someone u do start to wonder about other guys. You are right about letting it develop, I am trying to do that now woth mine but like you (lol) am not finding the sex so good. You need to ask yourself what type of guy you really want to be with eg. priorities, approach to work as why should you stay in it if you have no chance to spend more quality time together, it wont change unless you communicate with him. If not then do something for yourself and finish it with him. pleanty more fish in the sea...i guess. good luck
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (22 November 2010):
 Well, first of all, your boyfriend actually sounds like a keeper! He's ambition, he's independent, and he's got an excellent personality!
You two are just going in different directions. If he's the same age you are, he's doing the right thing with his life and future. You need someone who is more compatible with what you're looking for in a guy.
Don't keep him for just the "now" if you don't see a future in him. Break up with him gently and let him know that you understand where he is in life, and that you don't want to be fair to him and demand more than he can give. Tell him that you don't want to de-rail his ambitions, but you're looking for someone who's focused a bit more on having a relationship.
That guy will make some woman a fantastic partner. The timing is just a bit off in your case.
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