| A
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hey everyone.. Well, I've never asked a question on this site before so please bear with me.I'm getting married in about 3 weeks and I just happen to still be a virgin. Even though my fiance and I have talked about our honeymoon, I've really just been focusing on the wedding and now I'm finally getting the chance to breathe and I realize just how freaked out I am about having sex for the first time.I was just wondering - do most people have sex on their wedding night or wait until they leave for the honeymoon? I know since it'll be my first time that it will hurt, do you guys have any tips on how to make it hurt less? Oh, and I've never shaved before, with the exeption on my bikini line, I just trim it really short, should I shave since it'll be the first time a guy will be seeing me...like that? Have any other tips to share? Thanks in advanced. :)
View related questions:
fiance, wedding, wedding night Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2010): There's no 'right' answer, just enjoy being with your husband, intimate, sex or kissing or whatever you both feel like. For a lot of people sex is not that great the first time, so don't be too disappointed - it gets better! You might want to examine your vagina to see if you have a hymen, so you'll know whether that'll be an issue. Don't shave. Above all, just relax and try to enjoy the start of your life together and talk to your husband about your feelings and concerns.
I found sex really painful the first few times, turned out I had a septate hymen, you can get a doctor to cut it so it won't be an issue if you have one. Lubricant can help make sex less painful, also ask your husband to go slowly. I found it helped for me to go on top so I could control how fast he went in. But the main thing is to relax and not tense, because if you tense your muscles that can make it painful. Oh yes, and have lots of foreplay.
Above all, have fun and don't worry!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2010): The thought of sex for the first time may be somewhat intimidating. But the 7 billion + people on earth are living testimony that it can be done.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2010): Just want to say that your partner is a lucky guy. He married a virgin. If i could find a virgin man i would marry too instanly.
as far as your question goes: just keep the hair trimmed and do not have it completely. it gives you an irritation. and if your husband is virgin you got it all made. he is probably as nervous and you are but you both will be okay. have a happy life!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): Ok I have had 2 wedding nights, first time one, I fell asleep! I was so exhausted, and that mixed with a little drink.
I didn't do that on the second wedding night, we managed to slip away in the afternoon and we erm lets put it this way we were well and truly married, then that night we made love. We have been married 22 years and counting so maybe there's a message in that story.
...............................
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (21 November 2010):
 Most people (especially virgins) do consummate their marriage on their wedding night. You usually find a lack of urgency on the part of people who have lived together for years before they get married.
A couple of tips - You might want to consider making the marriage earlier in the day and not having a wedding reception until 3am.
As far as it hurting, one thing you might actually want to consider is for a doctor to surgically break your hymen. No, it doesn't mean you've been "de-virgined", but it will spare you some pain and bleeding. Otherwise, just go really slow, use lots of lubricant (KY jelly) and have a good sense of humor about it.
As far as the shaving thing, that's a better question for your fiance. I personally think that trimming it is just fine, but it's a matter of personal preference.
...............................
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (21 November 2010):
 Stay natural, the way you typically trim down there. Otherwise you might risk getting pimples or bumps or scars or cuts or irritation or ingrown hair... the list goes on and on. If you've never shaved before, stay as comfortable as you can, just go with the way you have done it so far.
As for the wedding night, I think that really depends on how long the ceremony is, how much activity you have during the day, how early you need to get up and how late you get in bed? If you are really exhausted I guess you wait until the honey moon. And if he's never even seen you naked before, I suggest you take your time and go step by step. Don't freak out about having sex for the first time with your husband. It will be wonderful. Yes it might hurt a bit, but you are in it together and you can take your time to work it out. And pretty soon you will enjoy everything. But in either case, you WILL enjoy the feeling and experience of just being close and intimate, even if you don't have intercourse you can have sex in other ways, and it will be special.
Congratulations, and best of luck!
...............................
|
