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... Send *asteofIndia a private message | | | *asteofIndia's profile:TasteofIndia here. I'm 33 years old, with my BA in Theater & Psychology. I suppose you could say that I have studied people and how to get into their heads. I've been here on Dear Cupid for well over a decade. I love Dear Abby, Ann Landers, all those advice giving goddesses... when I found this website how could I resist?? (Couldn't.) I love Dear Cupid, love being a moderator and love giving advice when I can!!
A lot of people ask if I'm from India... just to clear things up, I'm not. I'm not Indian, I just really liked that song by Aerosmith when I first made this account. I've never been to India. I'm not even an Aerosmith fan, really, but I really liked that song at the time.
I've been with my fella for 14 years, married for 10. We have two cool daughters and a pretty cool life that involves lots of adventure, art and laughter.
I adore: positivity, theater, llamas, fromage, sweatpants, earrings, and sitcoms. That just about sums it up... |
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What sex positions are most popular, and also unpopular, with women?
Q. what posistions do women love and hate?...
A. 15 July 2008: Wow, worrying about this too much. 2-3 inches is the consensus. Quit stressing about it ONLINE and start driving all this attention into the bedroom with your woman. Sex takes two to make it good. TRY EVERY POSITION IN THE BOOK (and by "book", I ... (read in full...)
What sex positions are most popular, and also unpopular, with women?
Q. what posistions do women love and hate?...
A. 14 July 2008: I'm not saying that someone can be too small to perform the act of doggy style. Per the discussion happening with my girlfriends right now, one can be too small to FEEL during doggy style, or too small to keep it inside and the thrusts end up ... (read in full...)
New to christianity..so is it wrong to masturbate to porn?
Q. Hi everyone, I have a simple question to ask. I'm new to Christianity and was wondering if it is wrong to masturbate or to watch porn? I want to know because I do both of these regularly and it has been eating me up inside and I don't have ...
A. 14 July 2008: Hey sweet,
Now you have to understand that most churches feel very differently, particularly in the Christian circuit. Some churches are more liberal and encourage masturbation as a healthy way to express yourself sexually without the potentia... (read in full...)
What sex positions are most popular, and also unpopular, with women?
Q. what posistions do women love and hate?...
A. 14 July 2008: Doggy style is a fun one, I don't know if it's intended to be a "favorite". Like everyone said, everyone is different. I, for one, love doggy style, but I've got a lot of girlfriends who HATE doggy style, because it's uncomfortable for them and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend insists on fisting me and having rough sex even though I have had many operations 'down below' and it causes me so much pain
Q. so i think i need some advice cause i am not sure what to do. my fiance and i have been together for a year and a half. we are deeply in love and he does everything under the sun for me. i couldnt ask for a better man. but we have a few sex issues. ...
A. 14 July 2008: Your situation makes me really upset. This isn't love, this isn't a true companionship. Your significant other shows little concern for you, your feelings, your enjoyment. He is a selfish lover and a abuser at that.
Boot this man to the curb, he... (read in full...)
What sex positions are most popular, and also unpopular, with women?
Q. what posistions do women love and hate?...
A. 14 July 2008: Depends on the woman!
Like me, personally - I love side by side sex, and I love being on top (thought I wear out easily on top). I like doggy style, but hate it when he has one leg propped up because it makes him go even deeper and my man is a lit... (read in full...)
When will I get my boobs?!
Q. im 12, nearly 13, im a girl and i have pubes and armpit hair and all of that, but what i wanted to know is when will i start getting boobs? and how will i know im developing? and what age did you have them at? thanks :)...
A. 12 July 2008: Hey sweet,
I got little booblings starting in like, 9th grade... so I was 14... however, they were super small until I turned about 18-20, and then they REALLY got empowered. I went up a couple of cup sizes and couldn't be happier!
Patienc... (read in full...)
When I call long distance she prefers to finishing watching TV. Disrespectful?
Q. Hello I am in the UK and my G\F is in NZ and I'm applying to move there. When I call long distance, sometimes she says she is watching one of her favourite shows and can I call back. I am pretty chilled so do not mind, but is this bordering on dis...
A. 12 July 2008: Hey sweet,
While I think it is a little tacky to choose TV over a person, if she has just one or two absolute favorite shows that she tunes into every week, maybe you should give her a break and quit calling her when you know they're on. If she c... (read in full...)
I'm not sure how to act around my parent's friends, any advice?
Q. i am nervous about seeing a show with my parent's friends because I don't know them and never seen them before. I'm nervous because i'm afraid that they might talk bad about me, criticize me, laugh at me. What should I do? Since my parents told me ...
A. 12 July 2008: Hey sweet,
Yes, I too think that maybe you were interpreting the situation wrong, or there was a misunderstanding. Do any of these people have any previous experiences with you? Most people don't just talk bad about someone they've just met and ... (read in full...)
Can you get pregnant the first time you have sex?
Q. can females get pregnant when they have sex for the first time? ...
A. 11 July 2008: YES YES YES YES YES YES YES... (read in full...)
Is she or has she cheated on me?
Q. Long story!! Me and my gf have been together for 3 years now, and always been happy together till last summer. firstly, a while back, last summer, her pops was v. ill and needed looking after. She concentrated her efforts on him (too right) i...
A. 11 July 2008: In my opinion, the gal could be cheating on you... but she could also be buddies with the fella and be a little nervous for him that you'll flip out on him. Maybe she just didn't handle the situation very well. Yes, maybe he's been flirting and ... (read in full...)
Guys, how do you feel about women's bodies after giving birth?
Q. I'm afraid my husband won'd find me attractive anymore after pregnancy. He tries to assure me that since I am lean, I will get my body back, but I know it will irretreivably change and will no longer look like the girls in the magazines. He wants ...
A. 11 July 2008: I asked my man, and he said that he loves a woman's body post-pregnancy. He says that it represents HIS child and are battle scars from a powerful woman. "That body represents our love, our life and our accomplishments together - the child being the ... (read in full...)
Single and lonely, and on top of that - pessimistic, how can I overcome this to find someone to share my life with?
Q. This is a complicated problem, but I'll try to write it down as best I can without being too confusing. First things first. I'm 23 years old and have never ever been in a relationship, or even come close to one, and am starting to feel the pinch o...
A. 11 July 2008: Hi there,
You've probably heard this a billion times, but I'll say it again. I think you need to get out more and start involving yourself in things that interest you. You say you're not much into the social scene, i.e. clubbing, drinking and part... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is helping his friend write a love song for his girlfriend - Am I making too big a deal of this?
Q. I'm in a really tough situation and i dont know what to do. i am in a relationship, and so is my best friend. our boyfriends are both bestfriends also and usually the four of us get along pretty great. my best friends birthday is coming up so...
A. 10 July 2008: I agree with Aeval, I really think that you are making too much of this. I sincerely think that you boyfriend is trying to help his friend with a very sweet gift idea. I'm not sure if you're a little jealous that your friend gets a song or if you're ... (read in full...)
I'm a lesbian, but I've recently found myself wanting to have sex with a guy!
Q. Im a Lesbian, but I want to fuck a guy. I have never been with a guy in my life, so this is wierd, I just have these urges to be with a guy... I kinda know him, but I really dont care, its not about him, I think I might be curious, who knows, maybe ...
A. 10 July 2008: Hey sweet,
You are so young and very few people are 100% solid in their sexuality until they're older anyways. I seriously think that if you are getting curious about being with a guy, you are young and have nothing to lose by getting to know a f... (read in full...)
I'm not sure how to act around my parent's friends, any advice?
Q. i am nervous about seeing a show with my parent's friends because I don't know them and never seen them before. I'm nervous because i'm afraid that they might talk bad about me, criticize me, laugh at me. What should I do? Since my parents told me ...
A. 9 July 2008: As long as you don't act like the last place in the world you want to be is with your parents friends, you'll be fine. Seriously, adults are impressed by any teenager with a somewhat sunny disposition because they're so few and far between! Just ... (read in full...)
I am a teenage male, who is seriously interested in losing my virgin status, how do I go about this??
Q. hi. im a 14 year old boy and i REALLY want to have sex. i can't stand it... im tired of people saying "just wait till your older. i want to now... i have friends at school who have already had sex. and if i get to i WILL wear condom...i just wa...
A. 9 July 2008: Ahhhh, youth. Sex is about so much more than just wearing the condom. How do you think the girl who you have sex with will feel when you tell her that you
just want to know what it feels like"? I'm not saying that what you're feeling and expr... (read in full...)
Do some girls object to receiving oral sex
Q. is it true that some girls dont like being eaten out?...
A. 9 July 2008: It's true for me!
I don't get anything out of it at ALL. Not to mention, I'm a little ticklish and hate to be tickled. The whole experience is just dreadful for me. I love giving oral sex, but I DEFINITELY pass on receiving. Several of my girlf... (read in full...)
My wife had an abortion before we met, now I don't want her.
Q. How to address this situation. I have been married for 23 years and very happily. We have 2 boys and they are now adults. I received an email from a site that revealed someone looking of my wife of 23 years. It turns out that the person is an ex ...
A. 8 July 2008: Don't judge her on what she did before you came along. If you're going to judge her, judge her as a wife and companion to you. Has she been good to you? Loyal? Have you had a loving relationship? She made her choice and while you may disagree with ... (read in full...)
Shall I wait to have sex with her until she becomes of legal age?
Q. ive been with my girlfriend for a while now, and the only worry iv really had is about the age difference (3 years), but that turned out to be ok after me meeting her dad and her parents being ok with me. although im 16 and shes 13 (16 is the lega...
A. 8 July 2008: Hey sweet,
Way to worry. Listen to your gut feeling. Don't have sex with her yet because of the legalities but also because while she may think that she's emotional and physically prepared for sex, she isn't. 13 is to young to really apprecia... (read in full...)
I saw my 44 yearold mother having sex - surely she is too old?
Q. I am 24. My mom is 44 she had a divorce after long married life of 28years.She was shattered and had lived a lonely life all alone for a year in her small parental town. When I got setelled with good job in a bigger town she came to live with me in ...
A. 5 July 2008: Hi there,
It is very sweet of you to be taking care of your Mother and so concerned for her. However, it seems like she has provided happiness for herself in finding a man to enjoy herself with. This man may be a very nice fellow, and they cou... (read in full...)
Boyfriend had a wet dream about another man...is this normal?
Q. My boyfriend told me he had a wet dream last night. In it,a man was masturbating him. And he came in it. I find that disgusting. He said it was only a dream and he's straight. Pls help. Is that normal?...
A. 4 July 2008: It's completely normal. Dreams are dreams and you can't take them very seriously. Don't interpret this to mean that your boyfriend secretly wants to do this or is actually gay. To be fair, that could be the fact - I don't know your boyfriend. ... (read in full...)
How do I give her space but also be available for her?
Q. my girlfriend is having my baby, she is 13wks along. We had numerous conversations about starting a family, getting married etc before we got pregnant. We went and looked at rings, tux's etc. We do not live together. Since becoming pregnant...
A. 3 July 2008: Hi there,
I actually agree with "Lilz Don't Know", because I think a letter is a good approach. Pregnancy can really be a reality check for some people, it can also be very overwhelming. I think your girlfriend may need some time to herself ... (read in full...)
What size and shape of girl do men prefer?
Q. I'm really curious. Do guys Prefer Skinny, slim, curvy or overweight girls? If you had to pick a clothing size for a girl what would it be?...
A. 2 July 2008: I asked my boyfriend and he said, "not some skinny chihuahua, I want my girl to have curves because then I just think about holding on to them."
I can vouch for him. He can't help himself when he sees a juicy derriere, he just has to take a look. ... (read in full...)
I need makeup tips to start the 8th grade!
Q. I really want to start wearing makeup. Like eyeshadow, mascara, eyeliner and lipgloss. I'm pretty sure my mom will approve because I'M GOING INTO 8TH GRADE!! ***I REALLY need LOTS of tips and advice!!!!*** PLEASE AND THANK YOU!!!!! xoxo...
A. 2 July 2008: Hmm... good tips and advice:
As Tremor said, less is more. I find it's best to really emphasize ONE thing on your face. Like, go for some cool eyeliner, but go with a simple gloss, and light blush. Or, choose a bold lipstick, but lighten up the e... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Over 600,000 visitors last month!
Q. Just a quickie We broke the 600,000 unique users/month (i.e. people!) last month. According to google analytics we had 638,310 visitors from June 1st to June 30th. Doesn't seem that long ago we passed the half a million mark. Thanks to all t...
A. 2 July 2008: SO CLOSE TO THE HOT MILLION! So excited for you Andrew, congratulations. Post more videos of your adorable self and that super hot accent!!
600,000 - truly an accomplishment. Congratulations again!
xx India... (read in full...)
My girlfriend complains that it hurts to shave "down there" but I don't want to go down on her if she doesn't!
Q. Hi, I have been dating my girlfriend for 8 months now and i have gone down on her twice. The first time i did it was the first time ive ever done it. So i liked it. But then te second time i realized that i didnt like it so much. Mainly because of ...
A. 1 July 2008: It does hurt a bit - for me, shaving is a totally awkward and not too pleasant activity. The worst for me is when the hair starts to grow back! Horrible, horrible.
I would either ask her to trim up or you buy her a gift certificate for a bikini w... (read in full...)
Is it safer to use 2 condoms?
Q. is it safer to use 2 condoms at a time?...
A. 1 July 2008: No it isn't any better - as everyone has said, the friction causes them to break. The best way to double up is with two different kinds of contraceptives, i.e. birth control & the condom.
Stay safe!
xx India... (read in full...)
What's the best contraceptive?
Q. i need help. i'm getting married next month and i want to find the best way to avoid getting pregnant. i heard that the pills sometimes has some side effects is it true? what r they? thanks....
A. 1 July 2008: I have used the Pill before and it was fine, but not great. Some side effects (weight, libido, etc.)... probably not my favorite, but it did the trick and none of the side effects were too awful. I did try the Nuva Ring and all though it took some ... (read in full...)
He saw me naked yet did not step over the limit with me! He says he did not want to rush things but I'm worried he finds me unattractive?!
Q. A guy i've been seeing occasionally came to visit me this weekend. He drove 1.5-2hrs to get here. This would've been our 4th "date". During our first two we had just cuddled but on our last date we made out a lot. I wasn't sure what was going to ...
A. 30 June 2008: He's a classy guy! Good for you, you found a genuine guy who's NOT A PIG! This is rare and envied!
Stick with this guy, sweetness - he's a winner.
xx India... (read in full...)
Any feedback please from anyone with experience of inter-racial dating?
Q. HI! I was just wondering what your guys' thoughts are about interracial dating. I'm black, and yes I AM attracted to guys within my race, but I'm more into white guys. Sometimes I find it hard, because I don't really know what a guy is thinking ...
A. 30 June 2008: Hello my sweet,
I am the product of interracial marriage - I'm half black, half white, my parents are/have been crazy in love for 25 years. It can work, it will work, provided you're not dating jerks who are shallow enough to be preoccup... (read in full...)
What's this weird obsession he has with my boobs?
Q. I've been seeing this guy now for 4 months, we have recently started to become intimate but havnt had sex as to be honest neither of us are ready. I'm 16 and hes 17 but he has this weird obsession with my boobs. I am really flattered that he like...
A. 30 June 2008: Probably because he's 17 and very excited about seeing boobs! The raging hormones can do crazy things, and he's probably just fascinated by your fabulous rack. Tell him that he'll get to see them more often the less he talks about them!!
Good ... (read in full...)
I need some ideas for my anniversary book, please.
Q. I'm gonna do a coupon book for our anniversary and all i have in it is a message. Any ideas of what to put in there? Thanks....
A. 30 June 2008: Some classics:
- 1 massage
- 1 night of dirty sex
- pick a position (where he can pick a position for you to have sex in)
- 1 "get out of this fight free" card (be sure you write the terms and conditions on that one!)
- 1 homemade dinner of y... (read in full...)
Sore breasts, is it because they are growing or a side effect to the birth control pills?
Q. Okay, i'm 15 and i'm on Birth Control. My breast have been kinda painful to where i can't sleep on my stomach anymore and i wanna know is it because they're growing or becauuse im on the pill? Thanx for reading,any advice would help....
A. 28 June 2008: Definitely either and/or both. Birth control does effect your breasts and can make them swell and sore. However, breasts growing can cause that kind of pain as well...
I find that sleeping on my stomach makes my breasts really sore, even now at 2... (read in full...)
Anyone else turned off by the way some guys kiss?
Q. Is there a reason why some men when they kiss a woman every seems ok but when the lips touch there comes the hard tongue and they think is sexy and that makes them great kissers. I find it a turn off and is not seductive..I actually said to this ...
A. 28 June 2008: Absolutely,
Oh my God. I could write a book on the bad kissers I've encountered. One I fondly refer to as "The Nuzzler" because you could never tell if he was kissing you or nuzzling you. No lip action! No tongue action! Like kissing a brick, l... (read in full...)
How can I get on birth control without going to my mother's doctor?
Q. well the thing is i want to be put on birth control and i have been haveing sex for about 3 weeks now and and we been using a condom but how does a 17 year old girl get birth control with out going to my mothers doctor and she nows i want birth ...
A. 25 June 2008: Look up your local Planned Parenthood - great people who are ready to help girls just like you. ... (read in full...)
Is getting him some baseball tickets a good way to get him to talk to me?
Q. Hey, I had an idea but I wasn't sure if it was the best or not. So i wanted some opinions. There's a boy I really like, but I've never really been with him or been able to talk to him. My idea was that where my dad works, they give out TWINS tickets ...
A. 25 June 2008: Hi!
Well, it's a great idea, but if your Dad got tickets, I think that you should go WITH him. Dont just give those puppies away, girl, you have a goal! You're trying to talk to this guy! Tell him, "hey I landed two tickets to the Twins game and... (read in full...)
Do you think this new guy I have been seeing may have a fetish?
Q. Okay I am just curious, I know there are people out there who have bizarre fetishes and such. I am wondering if this new guy I have been seeing may have one. I am curious here.....he recently set his myspace status to "I love coloring ;)" It soun...
A. 24 June 2008: It could, but if it does then I don't know what it means! Maybe he's just winking because it's a little childish (but still totally fun).
If he's into some weird coloring fetish, I would still stick around if you like him. Maybe it would be fun!!... (read in full...)
Does anyone have any soul searching suggestions, aside from the obvious?
Q. Heya, i'm a bit of a mess at the moment. Basically I just split up with my girlfriend of 1 and a half years last friday (i did the breaking up). The reason being, she wanted me to spend more time with her which on reflection was completely just and ...
A. 24 June 2008: Hi there,
It seems to me that if you really love this girl and can see yourself having a fulfilling relationship with her down the line, then I would say you are lucky to find your girl so early in life. And yes, you should absolutely be with the... (read in full...)
She doesn't believe in sex before marrige, how can I bring her around?
Q. Hi, I'm 19 and from the UK. I've been living in Banff, Canada for the summer and have met a girl that I really like who's a similar age. We've got with each other a few times and I've slept round her house after nights out and what have you......
A. 22 June 2008: Hi sweet,
I understand what you're saying, but the reality is that you're just going to have to respect her beliefs and her comfort. She obviously doesn't want to have sex until she's ready and while this may be a traditional way of thinking... (read in full...)
I have not told my mum that I started my periods and I've a school trip soon...
Q. ok so i need a bit of understandment help, a few months ago i started my periods and i never told my mum, because i just couldnt say anything really. but i am going on a school trip soon which includes an overnight stay...she has got my washbag ...
A. 21 June 2008: Well, she may be putting them in just in case, or she may be using that finely tuned craft of Mothers - intuition. You'd be surprised how much Mother's actually know... you think you've left them in the dark but they're usually a couple of steps ... (read in full...)
Should I forgive her or stay mad at her for kissing my boyfriend while we were drunk?
Q. my friend and i were at this party, with my boyfriend( but he wasnt my boyfriend at the time) and we all ended up getting really drunk with this other guy. and we all ended up making out with eachother. my friend had a boyfriend at the time, and i ...
A. 19 June 2008: Hi sweetness,
This is too far in the past, and it seems like at the time of this making out, everyone was okay with it. I just think that friendship is too important to lose over something silly like this. As long as she's not trying to make a m... (read in full...)
What makes a perfect dad?
Q. Hi me and my wife are having a child in October. Can anyone tell me what a dads role is? What makes a perfect dad? ...
A. 18 June 2008: (oh my God, that was so long. Sorry!)... (read in full...)
What makes a perfect dad?
Q. Hi me and my wife are having a child in October. Can anyone tell me what a dads role is? What makes a perfect dad? ...
A. 18 June 2008: Congratulations!! You sound like you're already going to be a perfect Dad because you ask this question and seem to have your heart in a wonderful place.
My Dad has always been a perfect father to me, so I thought I'd tell you a little bit of w... (read in full...)
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