Like what
she writes?
... Add *asteofIndia to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *asteofIndia a private message | | | *asteofIndia's profile:TasteofIndia here. I'm 33 years old, with my BA in Theater & Psychology. I suppose you could say that I have studied people and how to get into their heads. I've been here on Dear Cupid for well over a decade. I love Dear Abby, Ann Landers, all those advice giving goddesses... when I found this website how could I resist?? (Couldn't.) I love Dear Cupid, love being a moderator and love giving advice when I can!!
A lot of people ask if I'm from India... just to clear things up, I'm not. I'm not Indian, I just really liked that song by Aerosmith when I first made this account. I've never been to India. I'm not even an Aerosmith fan, really, but I really liked that song at the time.
I've been with my fella for 14 years, married for 10. We have two cool daughters and a pretty cool life that involves lots of adventure, art and laughter.
I adore: positivity, theater, llamas, fromage, sweatpants, earrings, and sitcoms. That just about sums it up... |
|
I don't know what I can get her for her birthday - since she lives thousands of miles away!
Q. Just a quick question - slightly irrelevant to the norm on this site - but I have an internet penpal with someone from America, and I have no idea what to get her for her birthday. Shes 14; I don't really know what I can do for her birthday or ...
A. 16 November 2008: Go online and have a big bouquet of flowers delivered to her. I always dreamed of someone sending me flowers... come to think of it, I still do.... (read in full...)
He fancies Heidi Klum, but I look nothing like her. How can he like me?
Q. Hi there, me and my boyfriend have been together just over a year and the other evening we went out with some mutual friends and the conversation turned to which celebrity we fancy most and my boyfriend said Heidi Klum. I totally agree she is stu...
A. 15 November 2008: Mmm, Johnny Depp - forgot all about that delicious hunk o' man. (how could I ever forget?!?!?)
He doesn't look like my boyfriend either, mmm mmm MMM!... (read in full...)
He fancies Heidi Klum, but I look nothing like her. How can he like me?
Q. Hi there, me and my boyfriend have been together just over a year and the other evening we went out with some mutual friends and the conversation turned to which celebrity we fancy most and my boyfriend said Heidi Klum. I totally agree she is stu...
A. 15 November 2008: Girl, John Krasinski (The Office) can rock my bed any time he wants to, and my boyfriend doesn't look anything like him. So what? Firstly, my boyfriends over time all look completely different, I have no theme of attraction. Secondly, when I look at ... (read in full...)
How do I get him to cum on me?
Q. Is it wierd for a girl my age (18) to be thinking about her bf "finishing on her"?.... lately I've been thinking about this A LOT after I gave him head, the first time he wanted to cum in privacy and I didn't think of it much but now I really want ...
A. 15 November 2008: Most fellas will be thrilled to hear that you'd like then to cum on them. Just ask him to when he's getting close! He would be crazy or extremely self-conscious to say no!! In fact, I'll be honest, I've never really heard of a fella wanting to cum ... (read in full...)
Lost and depressed..did I allow an old flame to 'take me for a ride'?
Q. Hi, been looking for some help and advice as I feel very much on my own at the moment and feel that nobody else is in the same boat as myself. Looking at the site however, I feel that there are people who are experiencing the pain I am going through ...
A. 14 November 2008: How to get over a break up:
The pain will stick around for awhile. But one day you'll start to feel it less, and it will slip a little farther back in your mind. The next day, even more so and etc. Time is really the only thing that heals a broken... (read in full...)
HOT trainer!
Q. hey guys, well i got a question i go to a GYM near my house and we are all pretty friendly with each other, i got a personal trainer who is the cutest and sweetest guy ive seen in a longgg time. It was our first session and instead of it being an ...
A. 13 November 2008: Keep going to your sessions and give it your all. If he's a personal trainer, he probably doesn't like a quitter or someone who half-asses the training and maintaining. I would use your next couple of sesh's to show him how dedicated you are to your ... (read in full...)
I need to lose weight badly... I resemble a cow!
Q. I need to lose weight badly, and I have made up my mind to do that. I'm particularly insecure about my breasts... they're too big, and too saggy. I realize there are worse things but I resemble a cow. If I were to lose weight, would it affect ...
A. 13 November 2008: I'm sure that your breasts are bodaciously beautiful, my sweet. I am sure of it. 36C is a totally normal size and an udder is actually a GREAT boob shape to have.
But, to your question. Yes, if you exercise, you will lose weight in your breasts.... (read in full...)
How can I prove to him I won't kick him out again?
Q. Hello! I was dating my fiance for a year and we lived together until I looked on his myspace and saw that him and his co worker were messaging each other back and forth with questionable content and it clearly pointed to him being involved with he...
A. 13 November 2008: "When he tells you he doesn't trust you won't kick him out again he is making sure that you feel so bad about it that when you catch him cheating or talking in a suspicious way to a woman again you will be afraid to react."
Yes!!!
Couldn'... (read in full...)
How can I suggest to him we use condoms without hurting his feelings?
Q. Hey guys! Well I am gay and have been with my boyfriend now for the best part of 3 years. We've recently started having sex but I am a little concerned about using protection. I mean I know that we can't get pregnant or anything like that but I mean ...
A. 13 November 2008: You sound like you've got a much more solid head on your shoulders than your fella. Yes, all kinds of creepy diseases could be lurking in the man-parts and you absolutely need to prioritize your health and tell your boyfriend "NO GLOVE, NO LOVE."... (read in full...)
I can't move from dating to a serious relationship.
Q. I have a question here for those with some experience in dating and having a serious relationship. I keep having a recurring problem, which is I can't move from dating to a serious relationship. Every time I finally find someone to date, we go o...
A. 13 November 2008: I agree with Butterflyfly, I think you need to turn up that charm a notch. It seems like you have all the right ideas, but you're saving them for later in your relationship - well, why wait? Bust out a little bit here and there and don't be afraid ... (read in full...)
Now that she is dating my friend we hardly speak.
Q. Its wierd right. I have this friend that i was really close to and had great laughs with. But then she started to date one of my friends and now we barely speak. I havent done anything wrong. What has happened?...
A. 13 November 2008: Maybe your friend is uncomfortable with her talking to other fellas... maybe she had feelings for you, and now is avoiding you so that she won't get into any trouble... maybe she's so distracted with a new love that she's flaking out on maintaining ... (read in full...)
What does he mean when he says he gets attached?
Q. What is a guy implying when he says that he gets attached to the people he has sex with? ...
A. 13 November 2008: Itmeans that he may not be a complete pig when it comes to sex. It means that he gets emotionally attached when he gets physically intimate. It means that he's not a one-night-stand kind of fella. ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to get pregnant just from his cumming shallowly inside me a few times?
Q. Okay this might sound wierd, but my bf and I have never had sex and I think I might be pregnant. It's not that I'm a virgin, 'cause I'm not, we are just staying away from sex until I turn 18, because he's 25 and it's illegal in ND to have sex with a ...
A. 13 November 2008: Oooh, baby... go get yourself a pregnancy test. Online pregnancy tests are bunk - unless you're peeing on something, you won't know for sure.
Everyone gave you great advice and I hope your boyfriend continues to be supportive and solid.... (read in full...)
Is it cheating if he's using her for money but not for sex?
Q. Is a guy cheating on his girlfriend if he just uses another girl for her money and not for sex??...
A. 13 November 2008: He's not a cheater, but he's a jerk.... (read in full...)
My first ever relationship with a girl!
Q. I just found out my girlfriend is still talking to three of her exs what kind of stuff is that and she said it's not a problem so I said it's okay if I do it then but she said no she's different, what's the craziness? Anyone help me should I give ...
A. 13 November 2008: I have exes, all of whom I have friendly, awesome friendships with. Hey, I mean, it's not as if I dated jerks. I genuinely enjoyed all of their company, but we ended for a reason. My boyfriend now could care less that I talk to them still - in fact, ... (read in full...)
How can I prove to him I won't kick him out again?
Q. Hello! I was dating my fiance for a year and we lived together until I looked on his myspace and saw that him and his co worker were messaging each other back and forth with questionable content and it clearly pointed to him being involved with he...
A. 13 November 2008: I have no idea how he managed to make you think that you overreacted and that you need to prove yourself to him. Ummm, isn't he the cheater? Didn't HE do YOU wrong, not the other way round?
I think that he needs to begging to get back into you... (read in full...)
I'm embarrassed that when I get into a relationship, she'll think I'm a loser.
Q. Hi im 23 years old and unfortunately still a virgin ive never had a girlfriend and barely have any experience. Its especially embarrassing because on paper I mean there is no reason why I shouldn’t of had a girlfriend…I mean people say funny, ...
A. 13 November 2008: Nooo, she won't think you're a loser. She'll think that she's lucky to have found a fella who was waiting for her to come along. You sound great and a lady is going to be thrilled to have you. Virginity is awesome, special and a rare quality...... (read in full...)
How common is it for guys to pay to see "live nude webcam" girls online?
Q. How common is it for guys to pay with their credit card to see "live nude webcam" girls online? I ask because I just found out my boyfriend is/was doing this and I find it highly perverted and always had the opinion of a guy who did this to be a sex ...
A. 13 November 2008: he may be getting charged per month - an auto-pay kind of thing. He's just paying for porn... pathetic, really, but fellas - they'll do it. I know my guy has an account on some site - course, the difference is with me, I really don't care. He's ... (read in full...)
Will I bleed on our wedding night?
Q. I'm getting married in exactly a month to my long time bf! We both have not had penetrative sex ever since we have been saving it for our wedding night. We are both 29. I'm worried that the first time will be uncomfortable. We are both familar very ...
A. 13 November 2008: Hello, my dear.
Not all women bleed their first time. Many do, some do not - either way will be normal and healthy.
Your first time may very well be uncomfortable. In fact, it will be, if you've never been penetrated before. I know it was for m... (read in full...)
I am going on my FIRST ever date and I'm so nervous. Please help!
Q. I'm with my first boyfriend. I'm 13 he's 14. We're going on a date soon... my first one. I'm super nervous! That explains it all...HELP!!!! URGENT!...
A. 13 November 2008: Yayy!!!! First date, I'm so happy for you.
Well, decide what you're wearing a.s.a.p. Get something new and totally cute - be it a new outfit or a awesome new pair of earrings - so that you're feeling ultra confident and foxy... a first date is ... (read in full...)
He's started saying I might be a lesbian because I hardly ever come during penetrative sex!
Q. i have been with my boyfriend for nerly 3 years now and i hardly ever come during penatrive sex but do all the time on my clit hes now started saying ooohhh you mite be a lesbian i now am reading into it but dont no what to think i am open minded ...
A. 12 November 2008: I think your fella is A) dense and B) Not very educated about women's orgasms. Most women orgasm through manual or oral stimulation - not just the lesbians, ALL of them. Maybe he assumes that if you're an OOO (Oral Orgasm Only) kind of lady, that ... (read in full...)
If she doesn't like me, why does she constantly e-mail me?
Q. I am totally into this girl she's 20 n I'm 16 we both work in the same office we email each other all day but she is so far over on the other side of the office so we can't talk much. I can't stop thinking of her she is gorgeous n her personality is ...
A. 12 November 2008: Maybe she's excited to have a friend, but not interested in a sexual relationship. Maybe she feels obligated to reply to your e-mails because she's polite. Maybe she's great with words, but painfully shy in person. Maybe she likes flirting with the ... (read in full...)
Hey guys - how would you feel about a gf who sings you to sleep?
Q. I'm curious and I would like to hear from guys. How would you feel about a girlfriend who sings you to sleep every night? I've always dreamt of having a boyfriend who would love that. I wish I could sing like Mariah Carey but my choir teache...
A. 12 November 2008: A little vice versa here, I'll tell you that it would drive me up a wall if my fella wanted to sing me to sleep. I don't care if I was dating Frank Sinatra (I'd have a lot more problems if I was dating a dead fella, but let's pretend.), I like my ... (read in full...)
My loving husband has been seeing a dominator for the past 3 years!
Q. I'm 28, been married to my husband for the past 4 years. I found out off a very close friend last night that he'd been seeing a dominator (I can't use the word dominatrix as it wasn't another woman he'd been seeing). She said that she was driving ...
A. 12 November 2008: Yeah, I don't buy your friends story... that's a mouthful of a sentence she heard. Even if she was walking by 25 feet away, I would still be pretty impressed if she heard what she claims to have.
Also, if your husband is devoted to you, I would ... (read in full...)
I am having confusing urges for my father.
Q. I have recently been getting some rather foreign urges. I am a 23 year old female, who is going to school and living at home with my father. My mother passed away years ago and my father has never really gotten over it. I love my father with all ...
A. 12 November 2008: You, my dear, need some counseling. No, not because you're crazy or anything, I just think that you're still grieving and in an uncomfortable place in your life. You may feel like your father NEEDS you, because he seems to be still upset over the ... (read in full...)
Should I teach my roommates a lesson?
Q. I live with 5 other girls and they drive me insane!! They are so immature, loud and gossip non stop. They keep me up all night even when I nicely asked them to keep down. They are so interested in my personal life, since we share a wall, they listen ...
A. 12 November 2008: I would be cautious about reporting your roommates, because since you live in that room, you might go down with the proverbial ship too. Talk to your RA and make sure that whoever does the busting knows that YOU are blame-free.
My cousin got kick... (read in full...)
She didn't say she missed me. Should I be alarmed by this?
Q. I have been dating this girl for about 3 weeks now, we get along great. we are on our fifth date now, we have kissed quite a bit, but nothing more than that. She has been very busy studying for her exam, so I haven't seen her in about a week. ...
A. 12 November 2008: It's hard to interpret the feeling of a text message. Her message sounds pretty light and flirty to me. I wouldn't be alarmed that she didn't say she missed you directly. I'm sure she does.
Your relationship is so new!! Don't worry! ... (read in full...)
My family keeps taking - stealing - the money that I've earned.
Q. Ok this isnt about any relationship but its about my mother. I'm really fed up with my mother wanting money from me because she wont get a job. i have a job and i get money. she owes me alot of money and my mother and father keep asking for more,...
A. 12 November 2008: If you're old enough to get out of your house, I'd move out. If you are living in your parents house for awhile longer, perhaps you can pay them a bit in rent, but it sounds like with all the money they've borrowed, you have paid rent for the next ... (read in full...)
Any other man could give me a baby so I wonder why I'm sticking with him?
Q. I have been married to my husband for just over a year. We have been trying for a baby for almost 3 years in total, but since we've been married, its been constant every month. I had a miscarriage 6 months into the marriage, and I haven't become ...
A. 12 November 2008: Hello my darling,
This post made me really sad for you. I'm sad for your loss - a miscarriage must have been really hard for the both of you to deal with. I'm also sad for your marriage - it seems to have been reduced to needing to reproduc... (read in full...)
Need Validation Please
Q. I've been more alone than this - but never so lonely. I have absolutely nobody to talk to about this problem. When I was 15 I was infatuated with my best friend's older brother. If you were to read my diary it still has entries of only him. I was cr...
A. 12 November 2008: Completely awful. I'm a mixed race kid too - I've been living that way for 22 years and I've had some hard times. I've encountered some real idiots along the way, real closed minded scum bags who foolishly think that skin color dictates ANYTHING ... (read in full...)
I want to marry him, but I don't want to end up stuck away from my family.
Q. After I graduated high school, I left all of my friends and family and moved 1000 miles away for school. While here, I met a great man and we've discussed getting married when we graduate next year. Everything between us is perfect, except that I ...
A. 10 November 2008: Hello, my dear...
My heart breaks for you. I am in the same situation and it SUCKS. Seriously, girlfriend, I completely feel you. I'm on the West Coast of the States right now, wishing I was on the East with my family and friends. I've been her... (read in full...)
Can a man cumming inside of me hurt the baby?
Q. during pregnancy if a man cums inside me can it effect the baby.. i'm only 4 weeks......
A. 6 November 2008: It can't hurt the baby, my dear. Don't worry. Just make sure you're having safe sex, because you have to keep YOURSELF healthy to keep the baby healthy as well!!... (read in full...)
He's obsessed with me and won't stop asking me out!
Q. This boy in my school has had a crush on me for ages. He keeps asking me to be his girlfriend, I keep saying no but he wont give up! At the start it was kind of cute, but its become like an obsession of his. He asks me at least 5 times a day. I ...
A. 6 November 2008: Worrying about breaking his heart won't do you any good - it will just make him think that you like the attention from him and he'll just keep asking you out until you go bananas!
Like Tisha said, the only way to get him off your back is to tell ... (read in full...)
Is it too early to move in??
Q. I'm not sure what to do.I'm 18 and I've been with my boyfriend,whose turning 19, a year and a half [on and off] and he wants me to move in with him. The only thing is that he lives with his mom still. I'm not sure if I should move in with him.Any ...
A. 6 November 2008: I hope you really like his Mom!! I think that moving in is a big step in a relationship and it's so much easier to make that transition when you are living on your own - or at least without his family right there breathing down your neck. That will ... (read in full...)
What can I do to make sure she is happy and comfortable?
Q. How do I get physical with a friend who is a girl? I think she doesn't mind. But when we are alone I would like to touch her more than usual. How can or what can I do to make sure she is happy and comfortable?...
A. 6 November 2008: How sweet!! You are a keeper, and she is lucky to be with someone who clearly cares so much about her well being. You seem to respect her and that's great. She probably won't have much of a problem getting comfortable with you if you are this ... (read in full...)
I woke up with blood in my underwear, what's going on?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been trying for a baby. I have been noticing my stomach getting bigger and so has he. But Wednesday morning I woke with a bit of blood in my underwear, it only lasted till like now Friday morning at 4:00. Plus it's 19 ...
A. 6 November 2008: Okay, silly American with my Fahrenheit... here I am thinking that you're freezing to death. Anyhow, my darling, you should get on over to the doctors if your temperature continues at 40 (104... oooh, you're not freezing...), because that's a pretty ... (read in full...)
How normal is this?
Q. hi I've been going out with my boyfriend for 4 months now and we're very happy together. We often spend hours just led together in bed (we haven't slept together yet) and we normally end up making out with one of us on top of the other (fully dre...
A. 6 November 2008: Sounds pretty much like what I was doing with my boyfriends at your age. There's nothing wrong with it - though I would stick with that and not move too much farther very quickly. Making out and dry humping is so much fun and once you go all the way ... (read in full...)
How can I find out if my teacher is definitely a lesbian?
Q. Hi I know this is a really common problem but this goes so much further. This may be long but I would really appreciate some answers :-). I'm in love with my art teacher, she's the same sex as me!!! I'm only 14 though but I look and act so much old...
A. 6 November 2008: Well, I think instead of finding out and pursuing her, you should back off because she's a teacher and could get in real trouble for cavorting with a 14 year old (no matter how mature you look and act, you age is still your age). I'm not saying you ... (read in full...)
How can I stand out at the Shakespeare audition?
Q. I know this isnt a dating question as such but I dont know where else to go ok so... On Friday im doing a audition to be in the play Twelfth Night. I m reading and extract from Olivia Act 1 Scene 5 lines 271-281, if anyone knows the play. My quest...
A. 5 November 2008: Hello my dear,
I'm a theater major (directing) and have done more auditions than I can say. Some go well, some not so much, but I can give you as much advice as I have to give:
Shakespeare is very challenging, particularly to young actors or ... (read in full...)
Should I break it off to salvage our friendship?
Q. I love my girlfriend deeply, but don't think I am in love with her anymore or if I ever truly was. I don't know what to do. I have cried every night since last Friday(I never cry) and slept in until 6pm every day too. She is such a great per...
A. 5 November 2008: Hello my dear,
You have a few things to think about. If she is so wonderful then you may want to hold onto her. Sometimes love takes a while to cultivate - sometimes longer than usual. What you have with her is a great base for a life long rel... (read in full...)
Just a drunken night or something more?
Q. Okay so here's my story. Sophomore year I had a huge crush on this guy, let's call him Jeremy. My best friend at the time (let's call her Shay) knew of this crush, and after a few months of me crushing pretty hard decided she liked him too. So ...
A. 3 November 2008: So is this guy still with your best friend? That's not clear to me... because if he is, then I'll tell you right now - that guy is absolutely no good. Any dude who cheats on his girl, no matter what, is probably a dude to watch out for. I know that ... (read in full...)
Lost and depressed..did I allow an old flame to 'take me for a ride'?
Q. Hi, been looking for some help and advice as I feel very much on my own at the moment and feel that nobody else is in the same boat as myself. Looking at the site however, I feel that there are people who are experiencing the pain I am going through ...
A. 27 October 2008: Hello there,
I do think you've been taken for a little bit of a ride, but it could be that your ex girlfriend is feeling guilty for screwing with your life, which she should be because she did. I'm glad that you realize what you've done here, be... (read in full...)
| *asteofIndia's friends
These are mutual friends, so *asteofIndia has
added them and they have added *asteofIndia!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
