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This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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My son's 11 months and still breast feeding, please help?
Q. I've been breastfeeding my son since he was born. I used to pump milk into a bottle sometime, but I stopped. If it's not milk he will only drink from a big boy cup( He's been doing that since he was 4 months) So now I'm back to the breast....He'll ...
A. 15 August 2008: I don't know if this would work, but I think I would try other mechanisms instead. Maybe mothers can have a better opinion than myself.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got mad when he discovered my plans to cheat! Should I walk?
Q. I have been seeing a guy now for a few months. We live together with a third roomate and we all have jobs. I have never cheated on any of my previous boyfriends, but I will admit I was interested in casually dating some guys behind my boyfriends ...
A. 4 August 2008: Dear poster, I hope that our collective advice will do better than lifting your spirits, by helping you decide the best course of action for yourself, by yourself. THAT will lift your spirits, believe me.... (read in full...)
Is he entitled to know who I was talking to?
Q. If a guy you are dating calls you when you are already on the other line and you ask him if you can call him right back, is it okay for him to ask you who you are talking to that is more important than him?...
A. 4 August 2008: I don't think anyone would blame you for sparing yourself the heartache.
Wish you the best.... (read in full...)
Why boys are interested in breasts so much
Q. People wonder why boys are so facinated with girls' breasts. One reason is the peek-a-boo or hide and seek faxctor. In our culture, breasts are almost always covered, even with the skimpiest bathing suit. This doesn't prevent girls from teasing ...
A. 4 August 2008: Unable as I am to engage in these high philosophical matters, I will only say that I just want a pair :-).... (read in full...)
She says she doesn't want to ruin our friendship my going out with me, what do I do next?
Q. iv been close friends with this girl for a year now, weve been like the best of friends the whole time and nothing has changed, we talk about everything and were always together, but for the last 6 months shes been obsessed with this guy that she's ...
A. 4 August 2008: All the help you need is this: she isn't into you. That fact might make the friendship difficult. If you insist on your feelings for her, that will make it impossible.
She sounds sincere. You were a friend when she needed you and she didn't e... (read in full...)
I'm 18, seeing a 16 year old... is it wrong?
Q. I am 18 and i am seeing a 16 yr old he is 17 soon but my parents think this is wrong and make me look immature. i dont no what to do . we both really like each other. please help me . i cant let go of him . i need to no if i am in the wrong. ...
A. 4 August 2008: Morally, I see no problem. Legally, I don't know. What are the laws in Britain?... (read in full...)
Is that idea a lie? Does that only happen in movies?
Q. Im really worried. I am 15. And all my friends are having sex and bragging about it. I am still a virgin. I really love this girl, so I asked her out. But she said no becuase i was a virgin. She recommended that i go to a prozzie, but i like the ...
A. 4 August 2008: As to your idea of how your first time will be, let me tell you that you can make many plans and have many ideas and expectations about it, but you can't really know how it will be. The best idea is not to plan for anything and just let it happen, ... (read in full...)
Why does he ask everyone for marriage? Doesn't he understand love or something?
Q. hi i posted a question about a month ago on here (is he just after a uk passport? - http://www.dearcupid.org/question/is-he-just-after-a-uk-passport.html )and our internet stopped working for about a month then he came online when the internet...
A. 4 August 2008: I don't think people anywhere marry complete strangers, unless they have a second intention. It seems this man does want someone to keep him, or a young girl to sleep with.
I understand citizens of the European Union can travel and work fre... (read in full...)
He told me we have to stop sleeping together before somebody finds out! Please help.
Q. This is my situaton. I am unhappily married for many years now. My husband and I stopped having sex and both sleep in different bedrooms. I have a high school friend and he is also married. Lately he told me he always wanted me but everytime I was ...
A. 4 August 2008: Double M deserves high praise for this answer. I think this is what's happening here.
I think the only way we can help you is to suggest that you think hard about your own marriage and decide whether it makes sense to keep it. If I were you, I w... (read in full...)
When will I find a true love?
Q. When will I find a true love?...
A. 3 August 2008: I can't tell you when or if. I can tell you to keep trying.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got mad when he discovered my plans to cheat! Should I walk?
Q. I have been seeing a guy now for a few months. We live together with a third roomate and we all have jobs. I have never cheated on any of my previous boyfriends, but I will admit I was interested in casually dating some guys behind my boyfriends ...
A. 3 August 2008: Just a note: it isn't clear whether he cheated on you or not. If he did, this seems like a different problem, but, anyways, it seems like you'd better get out of this relationship right now.... (read in full...)
I fingered her after having touched my penis, could she get pregnant?
Q. Hi im 18 and unexperienced, yesterday when i was with my girlfriend fooling around i came all over the place and she's worried some might´ve gotten into her vagina, can she get pregnant if it did??? [Added from the same user] hi, can a girl get preg...
A. 3 August 2008: This is very difficult to tell. "Touched your penis" as in "I touch the tip of my finger to get the fluids, and then I put it into my girl, while I finger her extensively" or as in "I touch my penis and then I touch the outside of her vagina"?
... (read in full...)
Back with my ex after a year apart, is it wise to get myself tested?
Q. Hi, I just got back in touch with an ex and we are back together. Do you think he should get tested before i sleep with him, as i haven't seen him for a year?...
A. 3 August 2008: Yes. And you get tested, too. He hasn't seen you for a year, either.... (read in full...)
What do you do when you can't afford a therapist?
Q. This isn't a relationship question, although when it comes down to it, it can be. I can't do this anymore and I just can't afford a therapist. I don't have health insurance and my job doesn't give me enough hours to apply for it. I was wondering if ...
A. 3 August 2008: I think you're not giving enough detail for me to know whether you truly have issues, or he does. From your description of what he says about you and your family, it seems he likes to provoke your anger. I think he is the one with the problem ... (read in full...)
What's the most pleasureable position where we can face each other?
Q. What is the most pleasurable sexual position for my girlfriend where we can face each other and look into each others eyes (so not doggy style) I’m very overweight and find that when I’m stood up when erect only 4 inches of my penis is easily ...
A. 3 August 2008: OOOOOPs! Big mistake. Confused, you can also find enjoyable positions even if you DON'T lose your weight. That is what I meant to say. Sorry, English is not my native language.... (read in full...)
I know it's said that size is not important but how you use "it", so can you give me a pointer or two of what this actually means?
Q. I am 20 years old and i am a VIRGIN!!! I know pathetic right. Well anyways I have met this girl and we have been seeing each other for almost 6 monthes and she is starting to pressure me about sex. Everytime we start to do it I get scared and freeze ...
A. 3 August 2008: I think women can better answer this question. But, let's give an example. Suppose you have a penis nine inches long, but you have an orgasm as soon as you penetrate a woman, no foreplay involved. Now, suppose you have a penis four inches long, ... (read in full...)
I always have erections when I'm near my (first) girlfriend, should I be worried?
Q. I'm new to tis gf and bf thing I just got a first girlfriend about a week ago and it was thnx to advice from this site but now i have a problem i get really hard around her a lot of time i have to litterarly stop what im doing and think about some...
A. 3 August 2008: I'm with Lexilou. Having the erections is not wrong. It's perhaps something you wouldn't want another person to see. Find a way to avoid that.... (read in full...)
What do you do when you can't afford a therapist?
Q. This isn't a relationship question, although when it comes down to it, it can be. I can't do this anymore and I just can't afford a therapist. I don't have health insurance and my job doesn't give me enough hours to apply for it. I was wondering if ...
A. 3 August 2008: I don't know of any website like the one you want. I've been on your shoes, wanting someone who just will listen to me. But that was because I already knew what I had to do and just needed a little comfort to getting the courage to do it. To give ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got mad when he discovered my plans to cheat! Should I walk?
Q. I have been seeing a guy now for a few months. We live together with a third roomate and we all have jobs. I have never cheated on any of my previous boyfriends, but I will admit I was interested in casually dating some guys behind my boyfriends ...
A. 3 August 2008: While I can't commmend you on your plans to cheat on him, I can't commend him either on the way he has handled it. He just doesn't trust you anymore. Instead of doing the right thing, that is, ending the relationship, he wants to keep you under ... (read in full...)
My husband only eats carbs and doesn't care about his health!
Q. my husband only eats carbs like pizza twice a week, pasta with chicken in red souce, english muffins, chocolates, he only drinks cramberry juice which with a lot of effort I changed him to light cramberry juice no vegetables and no fruits he dosen't ...
A. 3 August 2008: María Blanca, it seems like your husband's eating habits are not the real problem, even if you perceive them to be so. It seems that you're an overworked wife who can't cope with all that and a husband to drag along and take care of as if he were a ... (read in full...)
Men, how exactly are masturbation and 'the real thing' different?
Q. Just wondering how different does masturbating feel comparing to real sex for men. I am not talking about the emotional but strictly the physical aspect of it. Such as the difference in sensation between using a hand and thrusting in a vagina and if ...
A. 3 August 2008: A decent L has given a very good answer. I can't improve on that. I will focus, however, in you, poster. You seem to want an answer that's purely mental, a sort of 1-2-3, as if lovemaking was just a mechanical thing. That's not the way to ... (read in full...)
How will I know that I have made the right decision, and hurting him for nothing??
Q. After a weeks break from my boyfriend, we have now decided to part. The break-up was doing neither of us any good, and was actually tearing us both apart. But i now feel so lost and empty.Ive lost a considerable amount of wight and finding it d...
A. 3 August 2008: Excellent advice from Dearkelja. I don't think that can be improved. I can only say that you need to take your chances all the time, right or wrong, and carry on.... (read in full...)
Are these side effects from coming off the pill??
Q. Hello. I would like some help from women who have been on the Microgynon 30 pill. Ok I started taking the contraceptive pill when I was 10 for my heavy periods. I had started my period when I was 9 (very early bloomer) and was on the pill until I ...
A. 3 August 2008: Yes, they do seem to be side effects of discontinuing the use of Mycrogynon 30.
Here's a comprehensive link on Microgynon 30:
http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/medicines/100001653.html
As to the side effects, according to the information in that ... (read in full...)
What's wrong with this man?
Q. My man of 9 years left me for this woman he met.He has never done any kind of drugs and is totally against them.He met her the day after she was released from a Federal Pen after doing six years for selling crack coaine and pot to a bus driver that ...
A. 3 August 2008: I fully agree with Dearkelja. Nice post.... (read in full...)
Is he entitled to know who I was talking to?
Q. If a guy you are dating calls you when you are already on the other line and you ask him if you can call him right back, is it okay for him to ask you who you are talking to that is more important than him?...
A. 3 August 2008: The problem here is not whether he has a right to know who you're talking to at the moment he called. Clearly, he doesn't have to know. The problem really is the rest of the things you mentioned. He wants your immediate attention and details ... (read in full...)
Just sex or more.....I wanna know from a males point of view.
Q. I met this guy when I was going on vacation. I turned to throw something away and he said "Is there anything I can do to make you smile." I could help but smile and say "You tell me." We talked while I waited for the peter pan bus.(He's a manager ...
A. 3 August 2008: Well, it seems like you have this solved. I wish you and him the best.... (read in full...)
I'm wondering, is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Q. Quick question. Is there a such thing as love at first sight? I never really believed in it but three weeks ago at a party i met this cute girl and we've been dating since. Im 15, she's 14 turning 15 and she lives quite a while away, but it feels ...
A. 3 August 2008: Love, understood as genuine affection for the whole person you are involved with, develops over time. A strong attraction can be instantaneous. And a willingness to work something out with a person, no matter what, can develop after very little ... (read in full...)
How can I get over the physical and mental abuse of my last boyfriend?
Q. My last boyfriend abused me. He was emotionally, mentally, and physically abusive. If i did not want to have sex he kicked me in the chest. Because of that abuse I am having lumps show up in my breast. I am seeing a doctor about the phycially ...
A. 3 August 2008: I don't know about mental or physical abuse, but I think that you would only need to think that you're finally free. And, be on the alert to prevent abuses from happening again. Not everyone is abusive, dear, but no one is perfect. So just be on ... (read in full...)
What's the most pleasureable position where we can face each other?
Q. What is the most pleasurable sexual position for my girlfriend where we can face each other and look into each others eyes (so not doggy style) I’m very overweight and find that when I’m stood up when erect only 4 inches of my penis is easily ...
A. 3 August 2008: Confused, if you do decide to lose weight (which is your business), I'm sure you will be able to find some positions to try with your girl.... (read in full...)
I'm in love with him - But he lives in another country, and he has a girlfriend!
Q. I've loved my best friend of five years for a long time, and I used to think that he was interested in me as a girlfriend. We live in different countries but I eventually plan on returning to his country and I always hoped we'd wind up toge...
A. 3 August 2008: I don't want to hurt you, but what this guy says makes sense. It does sound like he really liked you. However, you left for another country and didn't give a sign of wanting a relationship with him. You hope you will be able to return to Mexico, ... (read in full...)
Can a relationship work without trust?
Q. Can a relationship work without trust? trust is only one way....
A. 2 August 2008: No, it can't.... (read in full...)
My son's 11 months and still breast feeding, please help?
Q. I've been breastfeeding my son since he was born. I used to pump milk into a bottle sometime, but I stopped. If it's not milk he will only drink from a big boy cup( He's been doing that since he was 4 months) So now I'm back to the breast....He'll ...
A. 2 August 2008: I understand you can't wean a child overnight. I'm not a mother, so obviously there is a lot I ignore here. I think I would try to give the child breast milk in a cup. He will make a tantrum but eventually will drink from it, when he is hungry. ... (read in full...)
My ex and I are very close as friends, shoudl we try again or has that ship sailed?
Q. I was with my ex for just under a year. We lived together, and every thing was hunky dory, we got on amazingly, sex was good, we were great companions etc. We had a problem sometimes with sex drives, as in his was all the time wanting it, and my ...
A. 2 August 2008: In my humble opinion, you're best off as friends. The reasons why he broke up with you are still there. I'm not sure whether he could sort them out this time.
Maybe you could try, but be aware that it might not work. At least, that's what I t... (read in full...)
Does he really weant me, or can he just not find anyone else at the moment?
Q. I met a man fairly recently we didnt have sex although of course he wanted to but men have always told me to hold back so did but seesm if you do that you still cant win. The facat he wanted sesx with me does it mean he fancied me or was it jsut b...
A. 2 August 2008: From your post, it doesn't seem like finding a woman is a problem for him. I guess that he didn't get involved with you because you would have wanted a serious relationship (at least, that's how you sound) and he didn't want one. It doesn't mean ... (read in full...)
Just sex or more.....I wanna know from a males point of view.
Q. I met this guy when I was going on vacation. I turned to throw something away and he said "Is there anything I can do to make you smile." I could help but smile and say "You tell me." We talked while I waited for the peter pan bus.(He's a manager ...
A. 2 August 2008: It seems like he was falling for you, but thought you wouldn't ever want him for something other than sex, so he managed to make a mess of himself by getting involved with another woman and impregnating her. He wanted to play in two arenas at the ... (read in full...)
What's the most pleasureable position where we can face each other?
Q. What is the most pleasurable sexual position for my girlfriend where we can face each other and look into each others eyes (so not doggy style) I’m very overweight and find that when I’m stood up when erect only 4 inches of my penis is easily ...
A. 2 August 2008: "Most pleasurable" would be defined differently by different people. In this case, the definition has to be both yours and your girlfriend's. Why don't you check this site with her, and define which one you like?
http:... (read in full...)
Is he distancing himself from me for a reason or does this just happen in relationships?
Q. My bf and I have been going out for about 2 years, and have known each other since middle school. He used to be open and caring and lately he has been distant and insensitive. He does not call me like he used to and he rarely says I love you ...
A. 2 August 2008: From your post, it seems that it was you who broke up with him, and he who insisted you two got back together. If I were in his position, perhaps I would be wondering whether going back is really worth the effort. You don't mention whether you are ... (read in full...)
Why would he rather wack off than have sex with the girl that's right there?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for one year. I like to have sex regularly but I'm not a fiend or anything. He's a normal red blooded male, I know he looks at porn although it's not something we discuss, and I know he pleasures himself when ...
A. 2 August 2008: I agree with the Wizard.... (read in full...)
Does a man embrace a woman a certain way if he fancies her?
Q. When a man opens his arms to a woman to get/give a hug, what is the best way for her to hug back to test for romantic interest instead of a good-buddy hug? I hate to sound like such a simpleton, but I need to know. Does a man embrace a woman a ...
A. 2 August 2008: Oops! I need to clarify that, where I live, you usually kiss a woman in the cheek when you say hello. Hugs are given only rarely. So, in our eyes, a hug says a lot more than a kiss.... (read in full...)
Does a man embrace a woman a certain way if he fancies her?
Q. When a man opens his arms to a woman to get/give a hug, what is the best way for her to hug back to test for romantic interest instead of a good-buddy hug? I hate to sound like such a simpleton, but I need to know. Does a man embrace a woman a ...
A. 2 August 2008: In my opinion, the way to really know is not that much how a man will hug you, but whether he will do it, and then for how long. But be warned because sometimes you very much like a friend and hug her tight and long. Also, pay attention to the ... (read in full...)
Has anyone actually had any proven success in gaining weight?
Q. Not a relationship question sorry, but a health one. I am 21 and am very skinny....however I eat like a horse yet still don't seem to put on any weight! I have zero definition on my arms and legs and it looks horrible. I am going the doctor anywa...
A. 1 August 2008: Well, yes, I have. I used to have the same problem you have now. Let's just say that, as you age, your concern becomes how to shed the pounds you put on. Enjoy that wonderful metabolism that lets you eat whatever you want and still stay skinny. ... (read in full...)
If I go on the pill and then off it, does that not lower the chances of conceiving?
Q. Recently lost my virginity, been doing it alot since. Only been using condoms, i know that they are not 100% reliable though i really can't afford to fall pregnant. I'm not worried about STI because me and my boyfriend have never had any previous ...
A. 1 August 2008: I recommend that you see a doctor if you have any questions regarding contraception. Doctors can help you best. However, here's my grain of salt.
I understand your question to mean "your chances of conceiving later in life". I don't think th... (read in full...)
Why did he ignore my text?
Q. First of all,sorry for my errors,English is not my national language:) I have a big problem.There is a guy who seemed to like me,he smiled at me all the time and stared at me.So I asked him about his phone number.He gave it to me willingly. After ...
A. 1 August 2008: This sort of things happens all the time. It doesn't have to be that you blew it. Just don't think too much about that and keep going with your happy life.... (read in full...)
He keeps hinting he want's 3somes. How do I get him to shut up about it?
Q. Why does my bofriend keep bring up this topic? Early in our relationship, he asked me if I would ever do a threesome with another girl. I told him "no way! i'm not sharing you!" about a month later, he asked if i would ever consider having sex with ...
A. 1 August 2008: He knows this is a difficult subject, so he prefers to do it through text messages.
Of course he wants a threesome and group sex, and keeps asking because he thinks you will eventually give in. I think the only way to stop this is to give a v... (read in full...)
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