Like what
she writes?
... Add *asteofIndia to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *asteofIndia a private message | | | *asteofIndia's profile:TasteofIndia here. I'm 33 years old, with my BA in Theater & Psychology. I suppose you could say that I have studied people and how to get into their heads. I've been here on Dear Cupid for well over a decade. I love Dear Abby, Ann Landers, all those advice giving goddesses... when I found this website how could I resist?? (Couldn't.) I love Dear Cupid, love being a moderator and love giving advice when I can!!
A lot of people ask if I'm from India... just to clear things up, I'm not. I'm not Indian, I just really liked that song by Aerosmith when I first made this account. I've never been to India. I'm not even an Aerosmith fan, really, but I really liked that song at the time.
I've been with my fella for 14 years, married for 10. We have two cool daughters and a pretty cool life that involves lots of adventure, art and laughter.
I adore: positivity, theater, llamas, fromage, sweatpants, earrings, and sitcoms. That just about sums it up... |
|
I love my LDR, but I dreamt about another guy?
Q. I´m in love with this guy with whom I´m having a long distance relationship for almost three years ago. He´s USAF but we are constantly in contact no matter if he´s deployed, etc. I LOVE HIM VERY MUCH! But, recently I´ve been hanging out with...
A. 10 September 2009: Eh, dreams are just dreams. You know where your heart lies and you know that in real life you're not going to cuddle up and get frisky with Office Guy. Like 'quiet-echo' suggests, it's probably just because Office Guy is around and is giving you a ... (read in full...)
How can you tell peoples feelings over the internet?
Q. How can you tell if someone likes you online? As in over MSN or something? This one guy starts a convo with me within first 10 mins every single time he signs in. Sometimes straight away. And he's always asking me about myself, and seems to want ...
A. 9 September 2009: Well, here is my question: how does he act towards you in person? It certainly sounds like he's interested in getting to know you and it sounds probable that he might like you. But, it could be that he's lonely or that he just loves chatting online. ... (read in full...)
Locked in his room all day looking at porn when I'm in the next room
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together just under a year. the relationship had a pretty rocky start as he was still in love with his ex. a few months ago we broke up, after he'd been to see her, and he told me that he didnt love me. he called me the ...
A. 6 September 2009: Yeah, I'm puzzled as to why this relationship is fulfilling to you. You spend no time with him, he's in love with his ex, he only says he loves you if you say it first, and then of course, this weird, all day, locked up porn thing.
Are you afra... (read in full...)
I thought our relationship was great...so why did he end things?
Q. Last week, what I thought was a perfect relationship ended. My bf and I have been together for over three yrs. things have always been good, we lived together for a short while and I was even pregnant with his baby (unfortunately I lost him). We are ...
A. 5 September 2009: Hmmm, sounds like he had a sudden freak out. Maybe he suddenly thought to himself "oh my God, we've been together 3 years. It's getting serious. Now the only place left to go is getting married. Oh God, I'm not ready for that, what if that's what ... (read in full...)
Why has my bf started calling me by my surname?? I find it a little odd!
Q. my boyfriend has started calling me by my surname - like 'alright smith' - just think its a little funny - what does that mean?! ...
A. 1 September 2009: I call my fella by his last name. It's just the nickname I have for him... and while I call him "snugglemuffin" in the occasional moments, his last name is his favorite pet name that I call him. So to me, it's a very sweet nickname.
If it reall... (read in full...)
If I masterbate am I still a virgin?
Q. Hi guys pls judge me. I have never make sex with any woman in my life. I think outside marriage sex is a sin but on many occasions I get attracted to porn pictures or scenes in movies. I helplessily find myself masterbating. Pls am I still a virgin ...
A. 30 August 2009: You're not sinning, you're having the healthiest relationship you can. No one is getting STI's, getting pregnant, bringing emotions or pain into the situation. This is a great, healthy thing.
You're a virgin. Your hand is not an genital orifice ... (read in full...)
How much "pocket money" should I give him while he doesn't have a job?
Q. Hello everyone, I haven't been on his site for a long time but I hope all is well for everyone...my boyfriend of 2 years has just been let go from his job of a few years today and I just happened to just geta promotion...I don't know how to deal ...
A. 29 August 2009: Who is paying rent or are you both living at home?
I think $400 is pretty extreme. It's only been 2 years, and you don't want to create dependency. You don't want him thinking he can get lazy and have you provide for him just like that!! $400 is ... (read in full...)
Only 14-25 year olds answer, please: I'm unsure about what to expect when it comes to handjobs and giving head.
Q. hello, i am a 14 year old girl going into eight grade. this is the grade where girls start to give hand jobs. I am just unsure of what i should do if this comes upon me, and how it will come upon me. will he most likely ask me to do it, or will...
A. 29 August 2009: Here is my question... now, I'm 23, so I fit in, but why 14-25? Because they have better technique, or because they won't lecture you? If it's a technique thing, I'll tell you now that the older they are, the more refined their skill is!! So the ... (read in full...)
I cant stop worrying that I'm pregnant!
Q. Ok well me and my boyfriend had sex but we use a condon EVERY time. Im a week late but im stressing like crazy, My step dad wont get my a prego test because he doesnt think iam because every time i have sex i stress out and i become late or early. ...
A. 28 August 2009: Hi there, sweetness! You are a perfect candidate for birth control!!! It sounds like you are stressing yourself out so much that you're throwing your cycle all out of whack. But what is better than one form of birth control? Two!! And then you can... (read in full...)
How can we avoid catching STI's/STD's when having sex?
Q. im 16 years old im a male and im wondering about a question. my girlfriend is worried about stds and i need some advice about avoiding problems like that i was wonderin if anyone can help me with advice about hygien what should i do? i know about ...
A. 28 August 2009: Go to Planned Parenthood and get both of yourselves checked out. You don't need your parent there, you can do this completely independently (though, WONDERFUL if you feel comfortable enough to include your parents in on keeping safe). Then, after a ... (read in full...)
Is it me? Is it her family? Why wont she talk to me anymore?
Q. Hi there. I'm 18 years old, and there's a girl I like who is 16 years old. We'll call her Claire. We met in February and became friends. At first, I didn't have any feelings for her. We were just "friends". She would do things that made me think she ...
A. 10 August 2009: I totally agree with Rifraf, it sounds like she doesn't exactly know what she wants! And I'm sure that her parents disapproval adds to the heaviness of her decision. I think if I were you, I'd let her know that you're very much interested and give ... (read in full...)
Two cultures...one wedding! How do we do this?
Q. My fiance and I have been together for six years and five months today. We're actually getting married in exactly seven months but we STILL have not compromised on a theme to the wedding. He's Mexican-American and I'm Irish-American and we want to ...
A. 9 August 2009: Baseball, coca cola and guns... Emily, you kill me!!! All though, can't say that I haven't drank some Coca Cola at a baseball game while shooting at targets.
Anyhow, there are plenty of ways to incorporate both of your cultures into one special ... (read in full...)
I woke up to find my boyfriend having sex with me, could this be considered rape?
Q. I hope you can help! I woke up the other night to find by boyfriend having sex with me. He said that i had touched him and he thought I wanted sex. I feel used and hurt. Was this rape or am I being stupid? ...
A. 9 August 2009: Sounds like a misunderstanding to me. I definitely do not think that he raped you, that's a big, nasty word!! But, I don't think you're stupid for feeling skeeved out. Maybe in your sleep you did touch him, and he thought that you were feeling ... (read in full...)
I buy my girlfriend gifts, but don't want her to buy things for me, how do I get her to stop?
Q. No matter what I do or say my girlfriend keeps wanting to get gifts for me. I have been trying as hard as I can to tell her she is the greatest gift I will ever need but she won't listen. She say's that I do so much for her that she want's to buy me ...
A. 9 August 2009: Maybe tell her to get creative and start making you things? If she wants to give you things and won't listen to you when you ask her to stop, maybe she can start doing things like baking you cookies, making you a picture frame or writing you a sweet ... (read in full...)
My friend is constantly making digs about my skinniness and it's getting me down...What can I do to get over this?
Q. Im in my 30's and have always been a tiny frame, only a dinker at 5 ft 2, and if I put on weight it only ever goes on my belly so I like to run 4/5 times a week, for fitness and to keep myself toned. I have this one friend, who every time I go out, ...
A. 8 August 2009: Hi there... you say you want to beef up a bit, well I think you need to - but not your weight. I think you need to beef up your attitude and honesty!! I think you need to be straight with your friend and tell her how her little comments hurt you and ... (read in full...)
I'm a virgin but want to be FWB with this guy... anyone got any tips on what to do?
Q. I have fallen for a guy who just wants friends with benefits, we have only kissed at the moment but he wants more, I am quite happy because I like him my problem is that I am a virgin and he is the only person I have kissed, he doesn't know this and ...
A. 8 August 2009: I can give you all the sex tips in the universe, but first you're going to have to sell me on this idea. I'm sorry, but just giving it up to a guy who has flat out told you he doesn't want anything but sex from you, that doesn't sound ideal to me. ... (read in full...)
Shouldn't he remove her from his contact list?
Q. I have been seeing my boyfriend for 8 months now. he broke off the relationship with his former girlfriend before we met, but because it was winter he still had his motorcyle and car stored in her garage. that bothered me because i felt there was ...
A. 8 August 2009: Personally, I think that you're overreacting a bit. I don't think that a forwarded e-mail is a threat to you or your relationship and I think you need to put more trust into your boyfriend. I think you are getting overly threatened by this girl, and ... (read in full...)
How can I tell her the truth about how many people I slept with, without losing her?
Q. I have told my girlfriend that I only slept with 5 people as she has only slept with 4. I did this at the start of the relationship. Last night she asked me again for the names of the people but I could not remember who I had told her as my f...
A. 7 August 2009: Well, the only thing to do here is to be honest and come clean. And if she leaves you, well - she's not the right gal for you. But, with more time this secret will only hit harder and worse. So the sooner you come out with your secret, the better. ... (read in full...)
Give him the boot or no?
Q. Hi and thank-you very much for reading my question =) .. I have been going out with this guy for 9 months now. I've been falling in and out of love with him because he's changed a lot throughout the past months. He also started to randomly talk to ...
A. 7 August 2009: I think you should definitely consider ending this relationship. Any guy who puts you in danger - hitting you, suggesting you drive drunk - clearly doesn't love you like he should. Any guy who truly deserves you and loves you, always prioritizes ... (read in full...)
Does watching gay porn make me gay?
Q. hi, i am 14, and a male, and i am straight, but sometimes when im watching porn i like to go to gay porn and watch it and when doing so i fantasize about my male best friend and i like it alot and it turns me on more than women do, but when ive ...
A. 7 August 2009: It sounds to me like you are curious... don't be so busy trying to label yourself. You are young and just figuring out your body, feelings and sexuality. There's no need to throw yourself in a box. A few years down the road, you may have a clearer ... (read in full...)
I'm hurt, losing my best friend, and need help coping please!
Q. sorry this is long but i need help im really hurt here.. someone who i considered to be my best friend has recently become new "best friends" with a woman P -who she is going to open a business with at the end of the year. P is wealthy, lo...
A. 7 August 2009: I think playing the "I miss you a lot" card will be most affective in this situation. Tell her that you really miss all the time you guys spent together and that you hope you can start hanging out more often. Remember, it is up to her friend how she ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend told me she loved me but I don't know what to say back to her!
Q. well it has been 1 month and a half in the relationship. just the other day she told me that " i love u" on the phone. i did not know what to say back to her, i just was in shock. dont know what to do... help....
A. 6 August 2009: Ooooh, you've brought back such memories. My first boyfriend, it had been 4 months, we were on the phone. We're saying goodbye and he puts it out there: "I love you". I was in total shock. I stared at the phone, and not knowing what to do, hung up ... (read in full...)
She has a baby with him, but he's a cheater, how can we get him to be a family man?
Q. Dear Cupid, My best friend is 17 and is in a relationship with a 22 year old. They have been together for 3 years and have an infant child together. He is constantly cheating on her, so she leaves him but he always comes running back and begging ...
A. 6 August 2009: She needs to stand her ground or leave him. One or the other. She shouldn't have to put up with cheating, and if he won't stop then she should stop being with him. You can't force him to change and if he won't, your friend shouldn't tolerate the ... (read in full...)
Trouble with the boyfriends close knit group and family! Please help!
Q. Hello. I have been dating a guy for almost 2 years. He has been friends with a group of people for 15 years (he's 31) so since high school. His brother is married to one of the queen bee's in the group. My boyfriends ex girlfriend (dated two ...
A. 6 August 2009: Hi there,
Here is my suggestion - why don't you throw a party? That puts you more in control and they can see that you enjoy their company by being personally invited by you. They do some like pretty bitchy (sorry) women, but it's great that you... (read in full...)
I'm hurt, losing my best friend, and need help coping please!
Q. sorry this is long but i need help im really hurt here.. someone who i considered to be my best friend has recently become new "best friends" with a woman P -who she is going to open a business with at the end of the year. P is wealthy, lo...
A. 6 August 2009: Hi there,
I feel for you. Here's what I think - first, start spending more time with some of your other friends. Second, I think it's completely okay, acceptable and not a 'jealous' move to give her a call and say, "hey, I really miss you. I f... (read in full...)
My girlffriend isn't as passionate anymore and won't talk about why.
Q. Hello, I am a 20 year old male and my girlfriend is the same age. We have been dating year and a half. We do not have sex because we are waiting for marriage. In the past couple of months, she gets in the mood to make out/fool around less and ...
A. 6 August 2009: I think that you might be hitting that year and a half bump. Sometimes when you get there, there starts a shift in passion... you get into a routine, and you start asking yourself questions about the relationship. You get in a rut and the "new ... (read in full...)
I wish and wish I could go back in time and undo my terrible mistake, but I'm scared it's going to haunt me forever.
Q. I'm so scared that I've ruined my life. When I was in college, I didn't know what I wanted to do, and I had to work a lot because my parents wouldn't help me out. I graduated with HORRIBLE grades (my GPA was either a 3.2 or 3.4, I don't ...
A. 6 August 2009: Okay, firstly - 3.2, 3.4 - NOT HORRIBLE GRADES. With a 4.0 being a perfect record, you have a pretty good record! Much higher than average. So don't sell yourself short, you really have a very good record and a lot of colleges would be happy to have ... (read in full...)
I broke up with my boyfriend because he was slating my mum... but now he says he'll change, I don't know what to do.
Q. i recenetly borke up with my boyfriend who i had been with for 2 1/2 years. he was my first everything and i also lost my verginity with him. i spilt up with him because he was talking about my mam in a horrible way(shes disabled) so i broke up with ...
A. 6 August 2009: If he really wants you back, then he'll personally apologize to your Mother. Face to face. Sincerely. If he refuses, then he won't "do anything" for you and I would leave him for good. Any guy who cracks jokes about your Mom, disabled or no - is a ... (read in full...)
He is jealous of me innocently helping another man. what do I do?
Q. I'm engaged to a great guy, however there seem to be some inscurities that pop up now and then. We were on trip with some friends and there waa a new friend who was going to stay with us in our hotel room. He's about 10 yrs younger and was talking ...
A. 6 August 2009: Oh geez, I think your fella overreacted. Unless there was more to this situation than what you wrote - if you might have been giving off flirty vibes or maybe eyeing the guy when you thought your BF wasn't watching... what you describes sounds ... (read in full...)
Whenever I express my expectation to her she gets mad!
Q. Girls, what all do you do in a relationship to make things happy and strong between you and your partner. I mean EVERYTHING..from getting up in the morning to the time you go to bed. I am in a relationship for past 14 months and I love her a lot and ...
A. 6 August 2009: So, you're looking for an obedient, Cinderella type? I hate to be harsh, but GEEZ. If you're looking for a girl to wait on you hand and foot from the moment she wakes up until the time she goes to bed... man, oh man. That'll be hard to find. I know ... (read in full...)
This relationship is all very one-sided and I want SO much more!
Q. I feel like I am in a one-sided relationship. I love my boyfriend, but he only has said he loves me when I found out he was on a fling site. Now I do not trust him, and he lied before so how do I know he is not lying now. he is going on a motorcycle ...
A. 6 August 2009: "I so long for a good man that will be true to me, love me and most of all be honest." These are all things you deserve and that a good guy can give you. I think you need to leave this man, his half-ass attitude, his lies and deception and we... (read in full...)
If it goes from a relationship to casual sex, shouldn't the issue be discussed first?
Q. Hi all got a relationship question if a u go steady with someone and the relationship goes down and only becomes a sexual one am i right by saying that the person introduces it by saying he/she just wants sex because they hoping that some how they ...
A. 5 August 2009: It sounds like he's just interested in having a convenient booty call without the effort of a relationship. He seems interested in only one thing...
I would leave this relationship and finds someone who wants all of you, the fun, the laughter... (read in full...)
Is this the beginning of the end of our life together? I feel disgusted with him since he told me his fantasy.
Q. My husband and I have been married for 18 years. I know he had one partner before we married and I had also. The other night after a drink he asked me my sexual fantasy. I gave some chicky answer....on a beach or somehting. His was....Since I am ...
A. 5 August 2009: #1 guy fantasy of all time: two chicks, one him. So typical and normal, it's unbelievable. It is no reflection of his commitment or love of you, he loves you to bits and pieces but can't help his love for boobs. And the more boobs, the better.
... (read in full...)
Neediness in relationships... I can't have it happen next time! How can I calm down while still showing interest?
Q. Hi there, I broke up with my ex-girlfriend around 2 months ago and I'd say I've done a pretty good job about getting over her completely. I even get happy when I see her photos on Facebook, etc. with her new girlfriend because they suit each o...
A. 5 August 2009: Hi there,
Well, you live you learn. And I think you learned some very valuable lessons from this relationship. You learned that space is really important in a relationship - you have to be able to miss each other to appreciate each other and let ... (read in full...)
If it goes from a relationship to casual sex, shouldn't the issue be discussed first?
Q. Hi all got a relationship question if a u go steady with someone and the relationship goes down and only becomes a sexual one am i right by saying that the person introduces it by saying he/she just wants sex because they hoping that some how they ...
A. 5 August 2009: I think if you are in a relationship and you really, just want sex, I think it should be made clear, yes. Otherwise, someone is getting strung along thinking that there might be more to it, that the other person actually cares about them and is ... (read in full...)
How can I convice my daughter that she'd be aborting for the wrong reasons?
Q. My 17 year old daughter is pregnant. We have always talked openly about keeping the baby should she ever become pregnant. Her boyfriend does not want her to keep the baby. I am so upset she is now considering abortion. We took her down to her ...
A. 5 August 2009: Hi there,
I'm concerned that you and her boyfriend BOTH are pushing her. You really, really want her to keep the child, he really, really wants her to abort the child - what does your daughter want to do? I realize that it's harder for her to b... (read in full...)
I think my boyfriend likes to make passes at girls who where glasses.
Q. is it possible my boyfriend might have a fetish for girls with glasses and dirty blonde hair? whenever i talk about getting contacts he's always like no! i don't mind since i can't get contacts in anyway because my eyes are really sensetive and they...
A. 5 August 2009: Well, he doesn't necessarily have a fetish. (All though, I think you're misusing the word. Fetish implies that he can't get sexually aroused without a dirty blond with glasses.) He might, I'm not saying it's impossible... but he might just think ... (read in full...)
I'm affraid he will leave me if I stop acting like a pornstar for him
Q. My boyfriend/fiance of nearly 3 years has always been very kind to me, but I do not know how to get him to treat me like a woman rather than a sex object. I will dress sexy for him and do my hair and makeup, and yes I am very sexual, but he is ...
A. 4 August 2009: Ugh, what a slimeball! I hope you realize that if you do get married, you are marrying THIS BEHAVIOR for the rest of your life, or at least until you get completely sick of it and finally divorce him. He clearly doesn't love you for you, he doesn't ... (read in full...)
Do you think this could be my orgasm?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over a year and we've been having sex almost as long. However, I don't know if I've ever had an orgasm... Anyways, when I'm on top I can make sure it feels good and sometimes it feels so good I feel ...
A. 4 August 2009: Hi sweetness,
This could definitely be an orgasm, but it sounds more like to me that you're right on the brink of an orgasm and perhaps next time, if you keep going, you could REALLY have an explosive orgasm. Don't worry about hurting yourself... (read in full...)
I thought teenage boys were supposed to be very interested in sex; why does my boyfriend not want it anymore?
Q. Ok so my boyfriend and I have been together for almost 10 months but he's not been wanting to have sex as much as he did. Whenever I want it he says not today (but not in an angry way) or 'Lets wait til another day' I dont get it because we'r...
A. 4 August 2009: Hi there,
Well, sounds like you're guy is classier than most! If he's still showing you that he loves you and still is as into the relationship as he used to be, it could just be that he wants sex to feel special and wants to sometimes build a ... (read in full...)
Do I just need to 'buck up' and take it?
Q. Please help. I am 19 and have been with my boyfriend for over 2 and a half years. I've never had intercourse, but he is 23 and has since he was 18... We've done oral mostly, and I've only been fingered a couple of times, with a ton of pain. I...
A. 1 August 2009: Hi sweetness,
First off, let me tell you a little story. When me and my fella had sex for the first time, I was number 23 on his list and he was my first. It's all good, we're married now and happy, so this has a happy ending. But, it took us ... (read in full...)
| *asteofIndia's friends
These are mutual friends, so *asteofIndia has
added them and they have added *asteofIndia!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
