A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hello everyone, I haven't been on his site for a long time but I hope all is well for everyone...my boyfriend of 2 years has just been let go from his job of a few years today and I just happened to just geta promotion...I don't know how to deal with it I know he's really down he's use to living a lavish lifestyle and now he's kinda gonna have to depend on me and I don't mind @ all he's always been there for me when I didn't have a job and i'm gonna return the favor because I love him and its only right. I'm 18 and make $1400 a month and have about $700 in bills each month..I haven't been saving money so im going to gonna have to start saving now...part off that $700 comes from paying his car insurance and now his cell phone bill...how much "pocket money" should I give hime each month?..does $400 sounda fair and realistic being that he has a car and mainttinence is required?...please be as honest as possible guys...thanks : )
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (29 August 2009):
Who is paying rent or are you both living at home?
I think $400 is pretty extreme. It's only been 2 years, and you don't want to create dependency. You don't want him thinking he can get lazy and have you provide for him just like that!! $400 is lavish.
Pay for only what you need, and give him the incentive to get out there and get a job! I wouldn't say he's taking advantage of you, but he could get used to this treatment and start to take advantage of you. So I would cut this back and not give him an allowance. If maintenance is required and he can't pay, you can front him some money - maybe agree that he'll pay you back for half later. Pay for some gas and perhaps some meals out or groceries (he can cook for you). But just throwing him a buttload of money doesn't seem helpful, it seems like you'd be enabling him to stay out of a job and in your lap.
Good luck, sweetness - and to your fella for finding a job! And congratulations on the promotion!
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