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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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Why is he waiting to get physical?
Q. I have been seeing a guy for over 2 months. During the past 2 months we have text eachother quite a lot every single day and we see eachother at least twice a week for nights/days out and in. The relationship is going very well, we respect eacho...
A. 13 March 2015: Adding to Sage's list would be he's a virgin and feels uncomfortable with the sex subject. He has ED. He is living with parents or roommates. He has deep scars below his belt that he's too embarrassed or self conscious to share. He has a phobia with ... (read in full...)
Confused and feeling lonely - not sure what to do
Q. I've been seeing a guy, hes older than me (17 years older). We met at work a while ago, I liked him after a few weeks of knowing him. He had been in a serious relationship which ended with two kids (but they're not married) and they ended the ...
A. 13 March 2015: Even in a relationship you would feel very lonely when he treats you like a rebound. He gets the benefits like sex from a girlfriend but talks to you like a friend who wouldn't have been so sensitive about him implying he still misses her.
T... (read in full...)
Should I suggest having a threesome with my guy?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have been with my partner for 3 years, a few months into our relationship he told me that he would like to watch me have sex with another man! This was like a bombshell to me. Our sex was great in the beginning but we only have sex ...
A. 13 March 2015: I suspect that the threesome is not really about spicing it up, but rather he has secret gay fantasies. If not, many heterosexual men regret a threesome like that and get jealous. A threesome is safe only when you have deep trust with each other, ... (read in full...)
I'm supposed to get married this weekend but I don't want to! I don't love him!
Q. I am supposed to be getting married this Saturday, but i really don,t want to and i am scared. im 21 my dad wants me to marry him but i don't love him, i don't even like him. its not about religion or anything. my dad just thinks he wi...
A. 12 March 2015: Tell your dad to cancel the wedding or he's going to pay in another way. In the uk it is criminal to force your child to marry against her will. He could spend up to 7 years in jail. In the meantime be prepared you will have to move out and stand on ... (read in full...)
Is my girlfriend manipulating me?
Q. We met online 4 months ago. Everything went fine and we started dating. She seemed like a nice, independent young woman (early thirties). She had a job, rented alone an apartment etc. After two and a half months her landlord told her that the ...
A. 12 March 2015: It does sound like a trap. She is too sick for work but not too sick for sex. I don't know what kind of person overdoses on sleeping pills if she does not have a sleep problem. This kind of deceitful behavior must have started at childhood. As a ... (read in full...)
I feel so guilty ... but was I manipuated?
Q. hi guys, I am in desperate need of some advice. I just broke up with boyfriend of a year and a half last week. It was long distance with both of us making an effort to see each other when we could. I have a 7 years old daughter from a previous ...
A. 9 March 2015: I am sure a "well raised" kid is mute and never seeking attention. Of course sarcasm here. He is not ready to be a parental figure so he has no right to comment on your parenting skills. Your loneliness made you resort to long distance ... (read in full...)
My religion allows polygamy but my society considers it taboo in my situation! What should I do?
Q. I am in love with a man..He loves me too . Problem is he is already married . Its been 1 and half years since his marriage and he is having a cute daughter of nearly 6 months. In our religion polygamy is allowed. He wants to marry me but problem is ...
A. 9 March 2015: If you marry him you have to deal with people giving you dirty looks or gossip behind your back. This is your first relationship, I believe you should try dating one on one to see what you prefer better. I guess when you grow up with a religion ... (read in full...)
Relationship with transsexual and lots of regrets. Help ?
Q. Hi, I´m 29y old, and last semester in 2014 I ended up having 3 sexual relations with pre op transsexuals. Basically I was a guy who always relate with women since 17y, I had 6 gf, always like women, when i was alone (off relationsships)b...
A. 9 March 2015: It's very clear that you are heterosexual. If going to transsexual feels like emasculating you and creating doubts about yourself, then it is not worth it. The key is to find something that eases your loneliness. Get a dog or cat. Animals love ... (read in full...)
Would a FWB help me to get over my ex?
Q. My heart is broken. 4 months ago the man I thought to be the love of my life broke up with me due to several reasons (not important for the topic). I'm still in love somehow, I miss him, but I know 100% it's not possible to get him back. Now I met a ...
A. 9 March 2015: I did have an FWB after a break up for the exact same reason, to get over my ex. During the day I would get excited about meeting him, curious about what he's like then moments later I would be sad. There was one time I was having sex and I had to ... (read in full...)
There is an abusive baby Daddy in the background. Do you think she was trying to ask me if I like her?
Q. Ok So about 2 Months Ago I Met This Girl Through A Mutual Friend. Now She Has A Baby Daddy Who Is Abusive And I Have Had To Get Involved Before. She's Ready To Leave Him And The Other Night She Told Me That She Has A Guy Friend Who's Rea...
A. 9 March 2015: She's calling him baby daddy, which means she still lives with him but no longer considers her boyfriend. Don't you think when she tries to date other people it would cause the baby daddy to be even more abusive? They many not be in love but he will ... (read in full...)
Dating a few months now. So why doesn't he want to have sex with me yet?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for a few of months, we both live with our parents so haven't had the opportunity to have sex. We both really like each other and the attraction is definitley there, it gets very hot when we kiss. I feel I a...
A. 9 March 2015: He could be nervous about performing and keeping an erection so he would rather end the night with cuddling rather than the awkwardness that comes from bad sex. Sometimes nervousness can be a good thing because it means he is serious about you. ... (read in full...)
Why would I cry when aroused? why am I unsatisfied when I'm touched? And why do I continue to gag during a blow job?
Q. 3 Short Problems Regarding Sex!!: 1. I cry when I'm aroused. Not when I orgasm, not just before, not afterwards. I cry during ALL of the foreplay leading up to it and after. Usually only when I'm with a guy though - I don't cry when I masturbat...
A. 9 March 2015: Our bodies are mysteries. I cry when my heart chakra is opened. Crying doesn't always have to be sadness, it can be a release. Tears are the safety valve of the heart when too much pressure is laid on it.
I just don't worry about orgasm. It is a pl... (read in full...)
Relationship with transsexual and lots of regrets. Help ?
Q. Hi, I´m 29y old, and last semester in 2014 I ended up having 3 sexual relations with pre op transsexuals. Basically I was a guy who always relate with women since 17y, I had 6 gf, always like women, when i was alone (off relationsships)b...
A. 9 March 2015: I believe you are hooked on transsexuals because they make an effort to be feminine. They succeed in making you feel like a man more than any normal woman could. Of course the price to pay is your wallet and also internal disgust. You are at a bad ... (read in full...)
His question about my kindness towards him shocked me!
Q. Hi everyone :) So, I've been with my bf for over a year now.. Throughout our relationship, we had arguments here and there. And well, we always figure it out and make it through. I am really happy with him and he feels the same way. We talk a lot ...
A. 8 March 2015: A lot of people would have reacted with aggression but since you are like calm, smooth water surface you reflected the meanness back to him. It made him feel bad and self aware. Some men would take advantage of your kindness, use you as a verbal ... (read in full...)
I met the long-lost, love of my life after 20 years...but I'm married with a son
Q. How can someone I hardly knew from 20 ago capture my heart again? But I'm married with a child. 20 years ago (I was 18) I met the most beautiful girl I had ever seen at a carnival. We swapped numbers and met up a couple of times and for the next...
A. 8 March 2015: Married couples suppress their desires to be with other people. Your long lost life just happened to bring those up on the surface. We always romanticize the one who got away. She also probably reminded you that your marriage is a little bit stale. ... (read in full...)
What do I tell my young daughter about her father?
Q. My 2yr old daughter has said to me today wheres daddy after watching all programs that involve a daddy in it, I kinda just brushed it off ?? She's never been in contact with her dad and he doesn't want anything to do with her, my problem is I now...
A. 8 March 2015: You tell her briefly what dad is doing as a career and where he lives. As she goes to daycare and learn about families then tell her not all mommies and daddies live together. As long as you are happy that's all it matters. It is better to be with a ... (read in full...)
I'm confused about my feelings for my ex-FWB!
Q. A couple of years ago I had a friends with benefits. It lasted around 2 years, and as far as I was concerned nobody caught feelings. I was doing all the chasing. I think I may have been too easy for him, at the time. It ended due to me seeing a new ...
A. 8 March 2015: I think you should stop meeting him over coffee. No one should ban you from having male friends but when it comes to people you've had sex with it's inappropriate. Whether he's into you it doesn't matter. You have a boyfriend now. Men who only make ... (read in full...)
Good girl meets bad boy.... do I cut my losses or suggest counseing?
Q. This is your typical good girl meets bad boy story...I have been with my partner for 3.5years and we live together. A year into the relationship, we were living together at this point, he found out I was seeing someone when we first started dating. ...
A. 8 March 2015: Bad boy isn't the right description of him. He has a lot of baggage and found you to be the savior to his problems temporarily. He put you on the pedestal until one day he snooped and found out you are not so perfect, according to his standards. ... (read in full...)
How do you know when it's time to break up?
Q. Hey everyone. So basically my question is how do you know when to break up... My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years. We've had ups and downs but it has been good! However lately, these past couple of months, I've had some th...
A. 7 March 2015: You have to decide which issues are fixable, and which ones aren't. When you say you live separate lives that could be changed. You can schedule private time just for the two of you. What's more challenging is the lacklustered passion. Only you know ... (read in full...)
It went to trial. He was found not guilty. The case is over. why do some people think it's not rape if it was non-consensual but not violent?
Q. I was raped about 18 months ago, people believed me, the police believed me and it went to trial. Unfortunately he was found not guilty. Every now and then I notice some people who I bump into just completely ignore me when they used to talk to me ...
A. 7 March 2015: I think intellectually everyone knows non consensual sex is rape but they are in denial. His desire to get revenge took over reason and her desire to get married led to this. She decided the pick of the woman so at least she had some form of control ... (read in full...)
It went to trial. He was found not guilty. The case is over. why do some people think it's not rape if it was non-consensual but not violent?
Q. I was raped about 18 months ago, people believed me, the police believed me and it went to trial. Unfortunately he was found not guilty. Every now and then I notice some people who I bump into just completely ignore me when they used to talk to me ...
A. 7 March 2015: I read all the answers, there is no doubt that rape happened but keep wondering, if you knew both of them were playing sick games why did you not stay away but instead put yourself into a situation where you would be made drunk? Were you in shock ... (read in full...)
Crushing on my lecturer is gettingin the way of my studies.
Q. I have this really big stupid crush on my lecturer and I can't stop thinking about him no matter what. i fantasise about him kissing me all the time and it's starting to get in the way of my studies as all I want to do is find excuses and ways to ...
A. 7 March 2015: A lot of people who crush are those that aren't ready or not in a steady environment to develop a serious relationship. Although the desire to love is still there. You didn't say that crush is getting in the way of your own relationship so I know ... (read in full...)
Is it time I ended my two year relationship with him over his disparaging nasty remarks to me?
Q. My family is going on a vacation. They rented out a nice cabin. They asked my boyfriend if he was interested in possibly coming with. The only catch is they didn't have room in the car for him so he's probably have to drive himself there but they...
A. 7 March 2015: My last 2 relationships ended after my exes saw my parents for the first time. Isn't that a curse? I think the in law relationships are tests for the reality of whether you would work out as a couple.
I think he has a built up resentment over you ... (read in full...)
Do I tell my ex that I slept with 2 guys while we we broken up? I know he'll hold it against me!
Q. My ex and I have now been broken up for a year. He moved to a different state for a job which prompted a lot of arguing between us so we broke it off. We've kept in close contact and although we've both dated multiple people, we've recently admitted ...
A. 7 March 2015: You either are the kind of girl he sees himself with, or not. He doesn't get back with you then change the story and say, "oh, now you are the kind for me because I happened to add some numbers to my list." You said you both dated multiple people. ... (read in full...)
Is this just what kinda person he is? Or am I genuinely to blame for all this?
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend today... and I really really need some help. We hadn't been together for much longer than a month.. but we had dated 3 years a go for 9 months. He was my first for everything and even though he was both violent to me and ...
A. 6 March 2015: Being a recluse and missing company are not reasons to get back with an ex. At least you gave him a chance but he showed you he didn't change. Perhaps he was suddenly single and was trying his luck on you. He probably uttered the same nonsense to ... (read in full...)
He liked me but I turned him down and even though he knows I like him now he says he won't ask me out again
Q. Before I ask my question, I think I should describe myself first to impact your answer. I am a very shy and quiet person. Not so much a conversation starter unless with friends, and sometimes I can be awkward. Now here's the story, About ...
A. 6 March 2015: You like him as a friend but he wants more than friendship. Being friendzoned is a most dreaded situation for boys. You don't like him that way, you only like the fact that he likes you. Continuing being his friend means you get to enjoy his ... (read in full...)
My bf is NOT good for me. What do I do?
Q. My bf is NOT good for me, at all, and I know I'll be much better off without him in the end but he's gotten into my head so bad that I feel like I can't do any better. He's made me feel like there's numerous women pining for him and how I should be ...
A. 6 March 2015: He is not good for you but you are staying because the idea that he's not good for anyone either brings you some security that he would always be around and not hurt you. He is also dependent on you for transportation. Although he was able to charm ... (read in full...)
We've been together for 7 years and everyone expects us to marry but I'm not sure if that's what I want
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for seven years, we were together in high school and for the last seven years we have had a distance relationship on and off due to me studying. now i am home for good I am starting to feel that i'm settling for whats ...
A. 6 March 2015: I have a feeling that you know you would miss him terribly and second guess yourself if you end it. Ask yourself what you would like to do before settling down without having to separate from him. What is he stopping you from doing? If you are happy ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for me to feel a little resentful towards my wealthy boyfriend for not helping me out when he can?
Q. I ve met my boyfriend 2 years ago and since then we are a couple. I am a widow with 2 teenage daughters. My husband passed away suddenly at the age of 52 from heart attack 6 years ago. He was 16 years older than me and a love of my life, and we s...
A. 6 March 2015: It's normal to feel resentful but I can understand why he's reluctant to help. Money can cause strain in a relationship. You will think he is so well off that it wouldn't matter if your daughter could borrow it and pay it off later. 5000 might be ... (read in full...)
Am I wrong to want to be a normal hard-working adult?
Q. Hello, I do not know if I really need advice this might just be me overreacting. I am 19.I hate unfulfilled promises, but I have gotten so used to disappointments. Growing up, I was told to put everyone in my family first before me, but no one seems ...
A. 4 March 2015: I am not sure if being young, smallest and moody are reasons for bullying. Maybe your friends are the giggly cool type who enjoy having fun and they look down on families who are overly protective because they associate families like that as ... (read in full...)
Are we prolonging a break-up, or is it possible that this can work?
Q. Hi community, I need your help. I've been with my bf for 3 years now and in the past few months we've become stagnant and too comfortable. I didn't know he was unhappy and in the past few weeks we have been going back and forth over it. 2 ...
A. 3 March 2015: I take that "when my passion ends" means you are not happy with life, you have fights etc but it doesn't just mean the relationship has gotten comfortable. Big difference.
I also take "taking a month to find ourselves" mean you are so consumed in i... (read in full...)
I want to get over him because I miss him when I am alone!
Q. How do I get over cheating boyfriend? I am in college and me and the ex were together for a year. I feel like he just stayed in the relationship for sex but I am not sure, Well around the 8th month I started talking about going to WA and he would ...
A. 2 March 2015: He never loved you but you must never think that's because something's wrong with you or you didn't try enough. He was never in the mindset to be in a relationship and does not know the meaning of commitment. You cannot make someone love you. They ... (read in full...)
Am I wrong to want to be a normal hard-working adult?
Q. Hello, I do not know if I really need advice this might just be me overreacting. I am 19.I hate unfulfilled promises, but I have gotten so used to disappointments. Growing up, I was told to put everyone in my family first before me, but no one seems ...
A. 2 March 2015: So I believe in your countries, there are many ladies who keep up with the outside world and they strive for equality status with men. It's just your family is traditional and don't want you to enjoy this freedom. Although on the surface women are ... (read in full...)
We want to get my parent's permission to marry but don't know how to do it
Q. I'm from Malaysia, 25 th years old and from indian family. I has a Sikh boyfriend for 6 years, he didn't gets a chance to tell his parents because he was afraid they would not accept our relationship because the different religion and he was ...
A. 2 March 2015: You've been with him for 6 years so there is no excuse that he didn't get a chance. Confront him about whether his parents have arranged a girl for him. In a culture where arranged marriage is common, no one dates for 6 years in secret. The one that ... (read in full...)
Was I expecting too much? Or was he inconsiderate when he chose to see his friends on the day that was our first anniversary together?
Q. so, in terms of problems it isn't really huge but, i been with my boyfriend for a year now and there this thing that has been nagging my mind for quite some time now. he was my best friend of 5 years before we got into a relationship and in those...
A. 2 March 2015: I think the mistake was turning it into a fight. Is it too late now to celebrate after you know he's the passive kind and waiting for you to tell him what to do? After a heated argument you are in no mood to celebrate. An anniversary doesn't have to ... (read in full...)
My wife misled me with her sexual past
Q. We got married 16 years ago and i had to ask her parents for permission to marry her since we were both brought up the old fashioned way, so at that time we got to know each other for about a year before we got married. before I met her I had two ...
A. 2 March 2015: I know from another forum that a guy had married two virgins and they both cheated on him while the experienced non pure one fulfilled her duty as a third wife. Not made up. You could look it up if you researched by I don't want to redirect readers ... (read in full...)
My wife misled me with her sexual past
Q. We got married 16 years ago and i had to ask her parents for permission to marry her since we were both brought up the old fashioned way, so at that time we got to know each other for about a year before we got married. before I met her I had two ...
A. 2 March 2015: I know there are women who fake innocence as entry to marriage then fake being sorry as the exit. They do that (drop the bomb) when kids turn 18, after their parents die, after christmas, and conveniently before Valentine's day. Those are the ones ... (read in full...)
My wife misled me with her sexual past
Q. We got married 16 years ago and i had to ask her parents for permission to marry her since we were both brought up the old fashioned way, so at that time we got to know each other for about a year before we got married. before I met her I had two ...
A. 1 March 2015: I was born too late so I probably shouldn't be here. I don't equate love same as desiring that she's never slept with anyone else. Just because people don't care to know about pasts doesn't mean they don't love their partner. I certainly get why you ... (read in full...)
Married 19 years and it's not been easy. How can I find the strength to leave him?
Q. I have been married for 19yrs and have three children (my youngest being 15yrs old) The marriage has been not the happiest at points. He had an affair in 2005 and we separated, if you can call it that, for a couple of months as he slept at hers dur...
A. 1 March 2015: He's not cut out as a family man. He feels stuck with all of you but can't find any other alternative or he doesn't want to deal with the legal side of it should you two divorce.
You should start talking to your lawyer about assets and get cust... (read in full...)
Is it because of things I'm yearning for in my current relationship? Or is being attracted to someone else common in a long term relationship?
Q. I've been in a relationship with someone 3 years older than me for 2 and a half years and he is great, we both share the same sense of humour and he is my best friend. We live together but recently my mind has been in such a muddle and I really n...
A. 1 March 2015: That's what happens a lot when people live together and they stop making the effort. Maybe you can suggest that you both take turns thinking of something to do because you miss quality time with him.
When you love someone you won't think about bein... (read in full...)
My wife misled me with her sexual past
Q. We got married 16 years ago and i had to ask her parents for permission to marry her since we were both brought up the old fashioned way, so at that time we got to know each other for about a year before we got married. before I met her I had two ...
A. 1 March 2015: Maybe it's the fear that all white women secretly love black men more and only marry white ones because of their parents. The assumption that blacks are sexier and whites are representable in public. I can assure you that's not true. There are many ... (read in full...)
My wife misled me with her sexual past
Q. We got married 16 years ago and i had to ask her parents for permission to marry her since we were both brought up the old fashioned way, so at that time we got to know each other for about a year before we got married. before I met her I had two ...
A. 28 February 2015: You are stronger than your images. They will fade in time. You can create good memories in the present instead. ... (read in full...)
My wife misled me with her sexual past
Q. We got married 16 years ago and i had to ask her parents for permission to marry her since we were both brought up the old fashioned way, so at that time we got to know each other for about a year before we got married. before I met her I had two ...
A. 27 February 2015: I assume you are both white. I am not going to pretend I don't know of negative stereotypes against black people and that race is just a skin color. I think her telling you this is more than letting guilt of her chest. Why, one day out of the blue ... (read in full...)
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