A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have this really big stupid crush on my lecturer and I can't stop thinking about him no matter what. i fantasise about him kissing me all the time and it's starting to get in the way of my studies as all I want to do is find excuses and ways to talk to him!He is in his 40's, very attractive, dark hair, tanned skin etc he knows how to keep my attention that's for sure.I think he knows I like him, as I can't help but flirt with him and he always smiles back with direct eye contact. He comes over talking to me in class, yet doesn't really do this to anybody else. We email maybe once a week and exchange humour etc He just leaves me wanting more all the time.....I know it's unprofessional and he could lose his job but I am dreading this summer being away from him for so long! Anybody else ever been through this?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2015): Hi, i am the original poster....
Thank you for both answers, I just wanted to ask ...
If i tell my lecturer I like him, for any reason, could I get into trouble?
Ie would I be kicked off my course or would my lecturer tell my other lecturers? Do they discuss this kind of thing in the staff room etc?
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (7 March 2015):
 A lot of people who crush are those that aren't ready or not in a steady environment to develop a serious relationship. Although the desire to love is still there. You didn't say that crush is getting in the way of your own relationship so I know you are single.
We have several kinds of desire and like tanks, each one has to be filled before you even think about a higher desire. Your desire to be wanted is interfering with your higher pursuit, education. So your body is keep telling you to attract a mate probably because it's time to make a baby at your age. It doesn't matter if your object of desire is a teacher or your classmate, you would project your desires to anyone especially if they show traits that you admire such as maturity and stability.
One way to deal with this is to get it out of your system by actively dating people who are single and not out of your league. The other way is to accept that relationships won't happen now but set your mind to have one after you graduate.
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A
female
reader, CattyCat +, writes (7 March 2015):
 As cute as this all is, it is jeopardising. I think the way around it starts by doing this.Confessing.If it's been a really long time and you still haven't gotten over your crush, you need to tell him. For example; "Hello, I'm finding it difficult to concentrate in your classes and it has got to the point where it is getting in the way of my studies, something I cannot afford. Basically.. I really like you. As immature as you may or may not find this, it is actually serious for me. I have tried to get over this crush I'm having for you, but it hasn't budged for a while. Where can we go from here? Do I change class or?"Honestly, prepare yourself for a professional let down because his account may be monitored so he can't say much. Unless it's his personal email he contacts you with. I don't know. But this is my advice based on the fact that it says your age is 26 - 29If you were younger, like 21 I'd say just change classes and don't mention the crush, make up an excuse like the other class fits better with your schedule or something.
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