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... Send *irtball a private message | | | *irtball's profile:Hello DC. Some of you may be wondering where I were I went. My life has taken a turn that has taken me away from here for the time being. I'm not really answering many questions at this time. If you PM me, I will respond, but it may be delayed a week or two. I had many problems dumped on me of my own, so I don't have much energy for the problems of others. I'll be back, but it just may be a while.
Wow, been away longer than anticipated. To sum it up, life sort of sucks for me at the moment. Not looking for pity, just letting you know why I haven't been around. I still hope things will get better soon, but who knows.
ALERT: If you're sending me a PM in regard to advice I've given you, please reference the thread or specifics so I can be on the same page. Lately I've been receiving lots of PM's with an answer to some question I asked, but since the question was from an Anon poster, I have no idea which answer it was in regard to. I give a lot of advice here, so I'm very sorry if I don't immediately recognize you. The question title or a link would be most appreciated. Thank you!
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Hi, I'm the bad bad charming sweetheart dirtball. Although recently I seem to have picked up the moniker "Dirty Balls" despite making sure to clean them thoroughly each day. Anyway, I love this site. I have a BA in Psychology which is part of the reason I think I like this site so much. I posted anon for quite some time before creating my profile. I took to the brutally honest approach which has gotten me in trouble a few times, but for the most part has gone quite well. I enjoy helping people and at times challenging them when I think it is appropriate.
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I've been getting lots of great feedback on my advice and I appreciate it, even if you didn't like it. With that said, I'd like to add a segment here I'll call (drum roll please)
DIRTBALL'S RULES ABOUT PEOPLE AND DATING (in no particular order)
Men don't befriend women who they are not interested in sexually. What do I mean by this? I mean that men will not actively seek out friends of the opposite sex unless they would like to make the friendship progress further at some point. Plain and simple, that's how we operate. Are there circumstances where they are actually just friends? Yes, those would be times when you are forced together in some way. Examples could be; fellow employees at work, a regular customer at work, shared friend circle. The key to watch for is if he looks to spend time with her alone. That's usually the sign that he has a romantic interest in the relationship.
Long Distance Relationships don't work. Go ahead and tell me your success stories, I don't care. Most of the time it is just way too hard for the parties involved. Too much doubt creeps into the relationship. Plus, can you really call it a relationship if you only get to be together rarely? I think not.
Once broken up, you should stay that way. Make up/break up relationships don't work. Why do you always feel the need to break up? It's because things aren't working. Then you miss each other and get back together, only to have the very thing that drove you apart last time do it again. It is a cycle that doesn't get better. All you're doing is preventing yourself from finding someone who will actually make you happy.
People only change if they really (and I mean REALLY) want to for themselves. Changes for the benefit of others are temporary. True change is very hard to make. It requires diligence, effort, and support.
Communication is the most important part of your relationship. So many times we have people here asking about how they should handle a situation when the solution is simply to talk to your partner about it. We forget how important this is. It affects everything. If you are feeling upset about something, it is best that you discuss it with your partner instead of burying it and letting it brew. Later it will explode when it could have just been a calm discussion if addressed right away. Communicate with your partner. If you never talk, why are you even together?
People can love each other and not be right for a relationship. This kind of goes back to the make up/break up rule from earlier but it extends to present partners or exes as well. When someone is part of your life, especially for long periods of time, it is natural that part of the love you carry for them will always be there. Just because you love someone though, that doesn't mean you should be together. That's the case with most of my ex GF's as I'm sure it is with many other people. Sometimes you need to consider if love is making you do foolish things.
You should set ground rules in your relationships. Let your partner know about deal breakers. Deal breakers being defined as things they would do that would cause you to end the relationship. It is good to get these out of the way when you are getting serious. That way, you can refer back to them if your partner does something against said ground rules. An example that I tell all my girlfriends (including friends who I'm not romantically involved with) is that I will never answer the question "Am I fat" or any variation of it (does this make me look fat, does my butt look big, etc). I explain why too. It's a trap question. Answer yes, and that's obvious. Answer no, and "you're just saying that." So I won't entertain that question. I know, silly, but this works for the bigger picture too. Figure out what's important enough to you that you'd be willing to end a relationship. Tell your partner what these things are. If they want to be with you, they should know.
When one person in a relationship has a problem, it's a problem for the relationship. You're not alone in your relationship, and dismissing your partner's problem doesn't solve anything. It makes them feel devalued and unimportant. Why don't you care enough to address something they think is a problem? It's because you know it's a problem but want to hide. Don't hide from it. If you do, it won't go away.
When a relationship ends, you need to give yourself proper time to grieve it. Like dealing with death, you go through the same stages. Denial, anger, depression, bargaining, and finally acceptance. This is part of the problem with rebound relationships. Take the time you need. Don't be afraid to wait.
Let the past be the past. It's over, it's done, and there is nothing that can be done to change it. There is no use dwelling on it because there is nothing that can be done about it. Don't worry about things that cannot be changed. You can't drive a car by only looking in the rear view mirror.
I'm sure there will be more to come, but these are the few I've seen myself repeat a lot in my rather short time here.
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This is, hands down, the best conversation I've seen about porn yet on this site: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-is-there-no-middle-ground-when-it.html
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Dirtball Rants:
1) What the hell happened to punctuation and grammar? I blame text messaging for the trash I see people write. It's not the content but the way it's expressed that makes me wonder what's happening to society. I realize that we're a multinational forum here, and I give a complete pass to someone who is doing their best despite the fact that English isn't their first language. But the crap I see from Americans, the British, Canadians, and Australians often makes me sick. If any of you read this, your posts would be much easier to read if you used paragraphs, sentences with punctuation, and whole words instead of abreviations like U, cuz, or wut! Quit being so fucking lazy if you want help.
2) There is a difference between the words your and you're. "Your" denotes ownership. "You're" is the contraction of "you are." Saying something like "your lame" is wrong wrong wrong! The same goes for there, their, and they're. "There" is used for things like places (look over there). "Their" denotes ownership (they wanted their cookies back). "They're" is the contraction of "they are." An example, "they're going to the service station over there to pick up their car which was just repaired." I bet that just blew your mind.
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Abreviations.
I use a lot of abreviations when I type advice so I'm going to start a list of the most common ones I see for use as a reference tool.
OP - Original Poster, the person asking for advice.
BF - Boyfriend
GF - Girlfriend
SO - Significant Other, your BF, GF, Fiance, or spouse in other words.
BTW - By the way
FWIW - For what it's worth
TBH - To be honest
IDC - I Don't Care
IDK - I Don't Know
IMHO - In My Humble Opinion
IMO - In My Opinion
IOW - In Other Words
THO - Titty Hard On (erect nipples) |
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I really don't understand what he is thinking or feeling!
Q. Hi everyone, I posted this the other day but didn't get any replies and more has happened since then so I thought I'd try again. So I posted a question on here a while ago, http://www.dearcupid.org/question/fallen-in-love-with-my-be...
A. 13 August 2010: I'm very sorry things didn't work out the way we had hoped. Do your best to stay strong with regard to the rules you laid out. It will be very important so that you can sort out your own feelings. How knows, you could end up in a "When Harry Met ... (read in full...)
I really don't understand what he is thinking or feeling!
Q. Hi everyone, I posted this the other day but didn't get any replies and more has happened since then so I thought I'd try again. So I posted a question on here a while ago, http://www.dearcupid.org/question/fallen-in-love-with-my-be...
A. 9 August 2010: Nope, this is the kind of thing that I come to this webpage for! :D
Ok, given the new information, there are again a couple of possibilities here. I'll do my best to lay them out as I see them.
Possibility 1.
The person you talked to the... (read in full...)
Porn versus love
Q. Mods note: OP's own title: I have an an age old problem-my boyfriend is addicted to porn. We actually broke up but got back together over it. I have two children and you can tell by my figure that I do. But my bf always tells me I am not fat. He ...
A. 8 August 2010: Anon porn hater. While you're entitled to your opinion, how you express it reflects very poorly on the argument you are trying to make. You have deraled the advice that this individual was seeking by bringing up a debate that will never be solved. ... (read in full...)
What would make him stop talking to me so suddenly?
Q. Well, I met this guy at a party, he seemed like a relatively nice guy. After that, we met a few more times at a few different parties, alas I developed a crush. We then started getting close to each other, we'd see each other on a weekly basis, ...
A. 7 August 2010: You're welcome, I just wish there was a different reason that I could see. Good luck in the future!... (read in full...)
Should I have sex with him even though he wont wear condoms and I'm not on birth control?
Q. i've been with my bf for 1year. hes my first love and im his he's two years older than me.. we are both vigins.. and homecoming night b4 his big game.. i well lets just say i wanna have sex with him.. he gave me i ring and we are getting married ...
A. 6 August 2010: For heaven sakes don't listen to MIchaela.Weeks! The pull out method is like playing Russian roulette. There is sperm in his precum, which starts coming out right away. That can get you pregnant.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend cannot handle my dirty past, how do I save this relationship?
Q. Iam 21 yrs old and have a very nice and loving boyfriend for the last two years. We both are very serious about each other. Everything was very good between us,but then something happened.. he got to know something that i have been hiding from ...
A. 6 August 2010: He absolutely has the right to chose. My point is the fact that she isn't a different person. The addition of this information has only changed how he sees her, not who she is. If he can't get past this, then he is right to leave. It will just ... (read in full...)
Curiosity about men's sexual organs
Q. Hello! I have a few questions about men [physically]. I know men have erections when they see a pretty woman. But I have a few questions that I want clarified and confirmed. 1.] What is the longest penis size ever documented? 2.] Men usually talk...
A. 5 August 2010: 1. Mine of course
2. Think... Pringles can
3. Yup, although I hear if it lasts for more than 4 hours I should consult a physician.
4. Of course, well, unless he's snipped. They're on the base.
5. Yup, but I liked the description someone ... (read in full...)
Dealing with the Awkwardness of Kissing Your Best Friend
Q. My best friend of 13 years and I kissed for the first time the other night. It led into a full on make out session that lasted well over an hour. Granted we had drunk a bottle of wine. However, the next morning, we woke up and it started all over ...
A. 5 August 2010: Ok, I think you read a little too much into it. That is one of the major problems with trying to have a deep conversation via text message. The way I interpret his statement about the end result is: no matter what happens, he wants to maintain ... (read in full...)
I really don't understand what he is thinking or feeling!
Q. Hi everyone, I posted this the other day but didn't get any replies and more has happened since then so I thought I'd try again. So I posted a question on here a while ago, http://www.dearcupid.org/question/fallen-in-love-with-my-be...
A. 5 August 2010: Drunken hook ups are one thing, but if he was truely into you, he wouldn't be hooking up with other girls. If he's talking about other girls while you're around, then he's likely not interested. You've kind of become "one of the guys." In my ... (read in full...)
Porn versus love
Q. Mods note: OP's own title: I have an an age old problem-my boyfriend is addicted to porn. We actually broke up but got back together over it. I have two children and you can tell by my figure that I do. But my bf always tells me I am not fat. He ...
A. 5 August 2010: Ahhh, the defensive, "Well, you just don't do it for me." Yeah, he was backed into a corner and got personal. I'm glad to hear that it was just once, but sometimes that once will never go away. We often regret the things said in the heat of a ... (read in full...)
Do I dream of him because he is on my mind so much?
Q. Hey. I've fancied someone for a while now and I've been having lots of dreams about him because of this. I know this is normal because I think about him so much during the day. He (apparently) seems likes me too and it's become obvious to others ...
A. 5 August 2010: Yes, it is because you are thinking of him so much. Dreams are not premonitions of what will happen. I had this same problem. I had a girl on my mind all the time. She haunted me while I was awake and showed up in my dreams the same. It was ... (read in full...)
What would make him stop talking to me so suddenly?
Q. Well, I met this guy at a party, he seemed like a relatively nice guy. After that, we met a few more times at a few different parties, alas I developed a crush. We then started getting close to each other, we'd see each other on a weekly basis, ...
A. 5 August 2010: What would make him stop talking to you so suddenly?
This isn't going to be easy for you, but here it is. You were a romantic option for him. Your flirty dates were his way of keeping you on the line while he was playing the field. When he ... (read in full...)
Should I still be friends with him when he made me feel "dumped"?
Q. I have a guy friend from work. We know each other for three years. From last July we started hanging out often and became really close friends. We had lunch together almost every day; we ran together couple of times a week; he asked me to go see ...
A. 5 August 2010: Then don't be friends with him anymore. I know, sounds easier than it will be in practice. The fact of the matter is that the things you were doing together were very much dates. Regardless of what he may have called it. It is natural to feel ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend cannot handle my dirty past, how do I save this relationship?
Q. Iam 21 yrs old and have a very nice and loving boyfriend for the last two years. We both are very serious about each other. Everything was very good between us,but then something happened.. he got to know something that i have been hiding from ...
A. 5 August 2010: Excellent answer Gabrielle. Male anon below, wow. He's in love with the girl she led him to believe she is? BS, complete BS. A person is the cumulation of their life experiences. The knowledge of her past doesn't change who she is or who she ... (read in full...)
I really don't understand what he is thinking or feeling!
Q. Hi everyone, I posted this the other day but didn't get any replies and more has happened since then so I thought I'd try again. So I posted a question on here a while ago, http://www.dearcupid.org/question/fallen-in-love-with-my-be...
A. 5 August 2010: Ok, I went back to read your original post as well. There is a ton of stuff going on here. Part of me sees potential here, and part of me sees this ending badly. I'll explain both perspectives.
The potential I see. Men don't spend time wit... (read in full...)
Should I have sex with him even though he wont wear condoms and I'm not on birth control?
Q. i've been with my bf for 1year. hes my first love and im his he's two years older than me.. we are both vigins.. and homecoming night b4 his big game.. i well lets just say i wanna have sex with him.. he gave me i ring and we are getting married ...
A. 5 August 2010: clickhere nailed it with one sentence. If he won't wear a condom, then he isn't thinking about what is best for both of you. Only proceed if you're ready for parenthood.
Everyone else gave great advice too. Your fears mean you're not ready. ... (read in full...)
Porn versus love
Q. Mods note: OP's own title: I have an an age old problem-my boyfriend is addicted to porn. We actually broke up but got back together over it. I have two children and you can tell by my figure that I do. But my bf always tells me I am not fat. He ...
A. 5 August 2010: Thanks for the follow up! So the root of the problem is that you don't like the type of porn he is using. The good ol' webcam. If it makes you feel better, these girls get paid too. They charge for their shows. Now, some people will record them ... (read in full...)
I'm all alone now my boyfriend has moved to another state!
Q. I've been dating my bf for two months. but he has to move out of state. you see, he's been getting threats from this punk at school so he's moving in with his grandpa for the year. anyways, I miss him so much! I live with a my mom but shes always ...
A. 5 August 2010: Even if this is your bff, it doesn't change the fact that the world keeps turning. Keeping in touch with him is definitely not out of the question. However it usually just ends prolonging the agony you both feel.
Redirect that energy. You sai... (read in full...)
Do men ALWAYS KNOW if they have had sex?
Q. {Mod Note - OP's own title] Help! Can your man ALWAYS tell if HE'S had sex in the morning? My guy is telling me he didn't because he would KNOW, but when I came back in the room 30 minutes later, he had no boxers on and was cuddling, when I clearly ...
A. 5 August 2010: Thanks anon who liked my advice.
OP, I love the fact that you think we're rude for asking about the details you left out. It makes my day. I love asking for advice about something, but giving the people I'm asking for help nothing with which th... (read in full...)
Dealing with the Awkwardness of Kissing Your Best Friend
Q. My best friend of 13 years and I kissed for the first time the other night. It led into a full on make out session that lasted well over an hour. Granted we had drunk a bottle of wine. However, the next morning, we woke up and it started all over ...
A. 5 August 2010: Shitty, nothing worse than a guy who can't come to grips with his emotions. But then again, with the definition of "friends" that you guys are operating under, I guess I can somewhat understand why he wouldn't want to take that next step. I guess ... (read in full...)
I'm 14 & my bf's 25, I don't know what to do, he loves me.
Q. OP's own title: I'm 14 years old and my boyfriend is 25. I really liked him before we were going out and he liked me too, he even dumped his girlfriend because he says he can't be with her when he loves me. I love him too but I'm soo scared abou...
A. 5 August 2010: He is a pedophile. He is a predator seducing a child. Run for the hills (not like you'll listen). If you love him, you'll end this before he ends up in prison. Do you know what they do to pedo's in prison? It's not pretty.... (read in full...)
Porn versus love
Q. Mods note: OP's own title: I have an an age old problem-my boyfriend is addicted to porn. We actually broke up but got back together over it. I have two children and you can tell by my figure that I do. But my bf always tells me I am not fat. He ...
A. 4 August 2010: Mia, your answers are seriously starting to cause me to crush on you a little bit. ;) Great answer!... (read in full...)
Dealing with the Awkwardness of Kissing Your Best Friend
Q. My best friend of 13 years and I kissed for the first time the other night. It led into a full on make out session that lasted well over an hour. Granted we had drunk a bottle of wine. However, the next morning, we woke up and it started all over ...
A. 4 August 2010: Have I felt like this? Yes. How did I get past it? I just did. As I said to your previous post, I really believe you have a chance to have a great relationship. I also don't believe for one second that he hasn't thought about this. It's likely ... (read in full...)
Confusion lead me to look at her phone while she was sleeping.....
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for a few years. About a year ago we started fighting a lot. Since then we have had sex only six times and we havn't had sex at all in months. She doesn't even want to kiss me or cuddle with me when we ...
A. 4 August 2010: Ouch, that guy is trying to steal her away. It is inappropriate to tell someone else's gf that you love them unless you are family. The fact that she responded in kind is a huge red flag in my book. I wouldn't necessarilly say she's cheating ... (read in full...)
Is tossing the salad a reglular part of lovemaking?
Q. Mod Note...OP's own title: Hey everyone. Is it normal for a man to be turned off by the idea of having anal sex with a woman and by the idea of tossing a woman's salad (pleasing her anus orally). I'm in love with my girlfriend and I find h...
A. 4 August 2010: I think it's gross, but wouldn't be opposed if a partner would really want it. I'd take a wash cloth and make sure it's nice and clean first. I'll try almost anything to please a partner, still, you like what you like, and don't like what you ... (read in full...)
Am I doing it wrong?
Q. I ve been dateing this guy for a few weeks I gave him oral sex today he is the first guy I have ever given a b j to anyway while I was doing it he started pushing the back of my head down on it further and makeing me suck iyt faster do all men do ...
A. 4 August 2010: happylife is right. He was guiding you. Many women don't like what he was doing, so if you didn't like it, you should say something. But, if you didn't mind it, then go with it. I would love for a girl to let me take control like that, but I'd ... (read in full...)
Transitioning from Best Friends (13 years) to Dating
Q. While I have always felt an attraction to my best friend, we have never really considered the possibility of him and I being more than friends. See, we've been best friends for 13 years now and have the same small circle of friends, which include ...
A. 4 August 2010: What an awesome story. The way I see it, you are already dating. Here is one thing I can say with near absolute certainty. He likes you, and had DEFINITELY thought about being more than friends with you. He was not being fully honest in that ... (read in full...)
I'm all alone now my boyfriend has moved to another state!
Q. I've been dating my bf for two months. but he has to move out of state. you see, he's been getting threats from this punk at school so he's moving in with his grandpa for the year. anyways, I miss him so much! I live with a my mom but shes always ...
A. 4 August 2010: Two months is nothing. You'll get over it. It hurts now, and it will for a little while, but before you know it, it will be ok. It really sucks when we lose the ones we love, be it through a move, a break up, death, etc. Time will heal.
... (read in full...)
Porn versus love
Q. Mods note: OP's own title: I have an an age old problem-my boyfriend is addicted to porn. We actually broke up but got back together over it. I have two children and you can tell by my figure that I do. But my bf always tells me I am not fat. He ...
A. 4 August 2010: Most men look at porn. That's not to say it should be approved of, but there are varying degrees with how much it can influence somebody's life.
What about it bothers you?
The reason I ask is that porn bothers people for many different r... (read in full...)
How do I stop myself goin back :'(
Q. Mods note..OP's own Title: Me and this boy used to like eachother (well apparently he did) but he got freaked thinkin i wanna relationship cuz he only wants some fun, so i decided i want to carry on having fun with him, ive told him before and we e...
A. 4 August 2010: For starters, he remembers. He's playing you, as you've noticed. How do you stop yourself from going back? Have some self respect/self control and don't do it. From your story, you're having to convince him each time. He doesn't want to be with ... (read in full...)
My former friend is causing problems in our relationship, how should I handle this?
Q. This is complicated. The guy I love is amazing and wonderful. But since we've had issues with a ex-friend of mine harassing me on the internet through him,things between us have gotten complicated. He doesn't blame me but feels upset all the same. ...
A. 4 August 2010: Without knowledge of what harrassment is being done, it's really hard to give advice. The only thing I can think of is ignoring it. If it is on something like facebook then he can block her or report her actions. Still, if you share more about ... (read in full...)
What should I expect when I lose my virginity to my best friend?
Q. Im only 15. i know im young but me and my best guy friend decided we might have sex. I dont know what to do or what to expect....We are just friends and its going to stay that way we are just going to do it to expiriment kinda. I dont really think ...
A. 4 August 2010: I'm with everyone else. You shouldn't do this. Sex makes everything more complicated. The fact that you are both nervous is normal and a clear indication that neither of you are ready for it. ... (read in full...)
What did my dream mean?
Q. I had the weirdest dreams last night. My bf was of 3 and a half years was sitting on my couch and my mum was sitting on top of him but facing towards him. They were kissing passionately and I was watching them through the living room window. I was ...
A. 4 August 2010: My personal view of dreams is that they mean little to nothing. Often they are a hodge podge of the day's musings and events. I look at them as the brain trying to make a story out of the process of establishing new neural connections (which ... (read in full...)
Is there anyway that you can get rid of a tan?
Q. This may sound like a stupid question - everyone wants to get a tan: how can you get rid of a tan??! I am a model and naturally dark skinned so I tan in ridiculously short spaces. A week ago, I walked to the store (10mins walk) and when I returned I ...
A. 4 August 2010: No way to get rid of a tan, but you can get rid of the tan lines. My cousin is a model and can't have tan lines either. The only thing I can think of that will help is to even everything out. I hope everything works out for you.... (read in full...)
Should I give my ex the money she is asking for even though she hardly ever paid anything and let me pay for most things?
Q. Hi everyone. Me and my girlfriend split up about 7 months ago. We have both found it really hard and she is the one that walked away from me without fighting. When we were together, we bought a flat together. It was solely in my name as i was the ...
A. 4 August 2010: I'm sorry female anon below, but no. Even if she needs the money this isn't his problem anymore. They broke up 7 months ago. He may have felt obligated to help her when they were together, but that obligation ended with the relationship.
I agr... (read in full...)
My girlfriend has double standards about oral sex!
Q. Dear all my girlfriends says that me tasting her cum is ok and should be a pleasure but her tasting my is disgusting and degrading to women Help please...
A. 4 August 2010: Yup, that's a double standard alright. All I can see is you saying the same thing back to her to point out how ridiculous she sounds. If she doesn't like it, that's fine, she doesn't have to. You don't have to like hers either.... (read in full...)
Will a Catholic guy marry a non-Catholic? And how can I find out what his family really think about me?
Q. Hey Guys, I searched a lot but some information based on they can some are not.. Does Catholic guy marry someone who is non catholic?At first I wanted ask this question before I ask to my bf Here is the situation my bf is Spanish Catholic but the...
A. 4 August 2010: Really, the only thing you can do is ask him. What I'm about to say is based on my knowledge having been rased catholic.
In order for you to get married in a catholic church, you have to be catholic. Being that his family is Spanish Catholic... (read in full...)
Should I be hopeful that we can have a future despite the distance between us?
Q. Dear Cupid, I am really in love with this guy that I met online. I find him very understanding, gentle, and uplifting. Every time we talk I always find myself feeling a realm of happiness that I usually don't feel otherwise. We always talk tog...
A. 4 August 2010: Most LDR's don't work. I do understand why people want them to, but really, what kind of relationship do you really have if you never see eachother. Hell, you've never actually met him. Sure you've talked, but you're basically pen pals.
Here'... (read in full...)
My brother wont let me come to his wedding unless I have a date to bring with me!
Q. all my brothers friends will have there wives and girlfriends at his wedding so he would like me to be the same. but he said if i can't get one for saturday i can't come to his wedding. well it looks like i won't be going became i get one. i've ...
A. 4 August 2010: Wow, how shitty of him. Even if his intentions are good, which I think on some level they are, this is still a horrible thing to do to you. Have you told your parents what he said? Personally, I don't think I'd go. I probably wouldn't talk to ... (read in full...)
Should I give my ex the money she is asking for even though she hardly ever paid anything and let me pay for most things?
Q. Hi everyone. Me and my girlfriend split up about 7 months ago. We have both found it really hard and she is the one that walked away from me without fighting. When we were together, we bought a flat together. It was solely in my name as i was the ...
A. 4 August 2010: I'd lean toward no. It is one thing if she had helped out along the way, but being that you've paid the majority of everything, you shouldn't have to pay her after your relationship is over. After all, you've tried to be fair, but you weren't ... (read in full...)
Do men ALWAYS KNOW if they have had sex?
Q. {Mod Note - OP's own title] Help! Can your man ALWAYS tell if HE'S had sex in the morning? My guy is telling me he didn't because he would KNOW, but when I came back in the room 30 minutes later, he had no boxers on and was cuddling, when I clearly ...
A. 4 August 2010: I'm confused. Cuddling with who? Did you leave him in bed with someone else? That doesn't seem very smart, especially when he's wasted drunk. Where did you leave him? What does the hole in the boxers have to do with anything? I'm really ... (read in full...)
Stuck in a LDR. Is it ok to look for a FWB?
Q. i am a 23 year old lady who is in a stable relationship.however my boyfriend and i are miles away we see each other once in a while like once a month or once in two weeks.when we see each other we make love and we both get contented however the rest ...
A. 4 August 2010: Are you ok? Yes. It is natural to want sex regularly.
Is it ok for you to have a fuck buddy on the side? Absolutely not. He will interpret this as cheating, which it is. If you love your boyfriend and are committed to him, this will destroy ... (read in full...)
Does he want to be friends or more?
Q. Hello! i really like this guy and i want him to be my boyfiend. The problem is, i dont know how to make it happen or even if he likes me! The guys i have gone for in the past have been players that are very forward in their approach (so th...
A. 4 August 2010: a) I think it's highly possible. "Nice guys" are notorious for being quite shy and not making the first move. From what you've described, he could be just being friendly. My mantra about men that I've repeated time and time again: Men don't ... (read in full...)
What did he mean when he said "it was just like talking to an old friend"?
Q. Hello all, I've been chatting to this guy online for a few weeks now. We've had very good chats etc. On Monday we spoke on the phone for the first time for about 2h. I then got the following email: Hello.. going to bed but thought I should say goo...
A. 4 August 2010: I say this is a really good thing. It shows a level of comfort beyond the tenure of your relationship. He's into you. Now, what are you going to do from here?... (read in full...)
Do opposite sex siblings talk about sex?
Q. Is it common for a brother a sister to talk about sex? Do siblings talk about anything?...
A. 4 August 2010: Excellent response marriedlady. It does really depend on the relationship they have. I hated my brother for the first 15 years of my life. I would barely talk to him about anything other than the basics. I actively avoided him. Now, we're quite ... (read in full...)
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