New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login245057 questions, 1084626 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap
*irtball agony aunt

*irtball

United States  (Male   XML/RSS

Like what he writes?
... Add *irtball to your favourite agony aunts

Want to get in touch?
... Send *irtball a private message

*irtball's Ratings
Excellent70%
Average7%
Poor23%
*irtball's profile:

Hello DC. Some of you may be wondering where I were I went. My life has taken a turn that has taken me away from here for the time being. I'm not really answering many questions at this time. If you PM me, I will respond, but it may be delayed a week or two. I had many problems dumped on me of my own, so I don't have much energy for the problems of others. I'll be back, but it just may be a while.

Wow, been away longer than anticipated. To sum it up, life sort of sucks for me at the moment. Not looking for pity, just letting you know why I haven't been around. I still hope things will get better soon, but who knows.

ALERT: If you're sending me a PM in regard to advice I've given you, please reference the thread or specifics so I can be on the same page. Lately I've been receiving lots of PM's with an answer to some question I asked, but since the question was from an Anon poster, I have no idea which answer it was in regard to. I give a lot of advice here, so I'm very sorry if I don't immediately recognize you. The question title or a link would be most appreciated. Thank you!

_____________________________________________

Hi, I'm the bad bad charming sweetheart dirtball. Although recently I seem to have picked up the moniker "Dirty Balls" despite making sure to clean them thoroughly each day. Anyway, I love this site. I have a BA in Psychology which is part of the reason I think I like this site so much. I posted anon for quite some time before creating my profile. I took to the brutally honest approach which has gotten me in trouble a few times, but for the most part has gone quite well. I enjoy helping people and at times challenging them when I think it is appropriate.

_____________________________________________

I've been getting lots of great feedback on my advice and I appreciate it, even if you didn't like it. With that said, I'd like to add a segment here I'll call (drum roll please)

DIRTBALL'S RULES ABOUT PEOPLE AND DATING (in no particular order)

Men don't befriend women who they are not interested in sexually. What do I mean by this? I mean that men will not actively seek out friends of the opposite sex unless they would like to make the friendship progress further at some point. Plain and simple, that's how we operate. Are there circumstances where they are actually just friends? Yes, those would be times when you are forced together in some way. Examples could be; fellow employees at work, a regular customer at work, shared friend circle. The key to watch for is if he looks to spend time with her alone. That's usually the sign that he has a romantic interest in the relationship.

Long Distance Relationships don't work. Go ahead and tell me your success stories, I don't care. Most of the time it is just way too hard for the parties involved. Too much doubt creeps into the relationship. Plus, can you really call it a relationship if you only get to be together rarely? I think not.

Once broken up, you should stay that way. Make up/break up relationships don't work. Why do you always feel the need to break up? It's because things aren't working. Then you miss each other and get back together, only to have the very thing that drove you apart last time do it again. It is a cycle that doesn't get better. All you're doing is preventing yourself from finding someone who will actually make you happy.

People only change if they really (and I mean REALLY) want to for themselves. Changes for the benefit of others are temporary. True change is very hard to make. It requires diligence, effort, and support.

Communication is the most important part of your relationship. So many times we have people here asking about how they should handle a situation when the solution is simply to talk to your partner about it. We forget how important this is. It affects everything. If you are feeling upset about something, it is best that you discuss it with your partner instead of burying it and letting it brew. Later it will explode when it could have just been a calm discussion if addressed right away. Communicate with your partner. If you never talk, why are you even together?

People can love each other and not be right for a relationship. This kind of goes back to the make up/break up rule from earlier but it extends to present partners or exes as well. When someone is part of your life, especially for long periods of time, it is natural that part of the love you carry for them will always be there. Just because you love someone though, that doesn't mean you should be together. That's the case with most of my ex GF's as I'm sure it is with many other people. Sometimes you need to consider if love is making you do foolish things.

You should set ground rules in your relationships. Let your partner know about deal breakers. Deal breakers being defined as things they would do that would cause you to end the relationship. It is good to get these out of the way when you are getting serious. That way, you can refer back to them if your partner does something against said ground rules. An example that I tell all my girlfriends (including friends who I'm not romantically involved with) is that I will never answer the question "Am I fat" or any variation of it (does this make me look fat, does my butt look big, etc). I explain why too. It's a trap question. Answer yes, and that's obvious. Answer no, and "you're just saying that." So I won't entertain that question. I know, silly, but this works for the bigger picture too. Figure out what's important enough to you that you'd be willing to end a relationship. Tell your partner what these things are. If they want to be with you, they should know.

When one person in a relationship has a problem, it's a problem for the relationship. You're not alone in your relationship, and dismissing your partner's problem doesn't solve anything. It makes them feel devalued and unimportant. Why don't you care enough to address something they think is a problem? It's because you know it's a problem but want to hide. Don't hide from it. If you do, it won't go away.

When a relationship ends, you need to give yourself proper time to grieve it. Like dealing with death, you go through the same stages. Denial, anger, depression, bargaining, and finally acceptance. This is part of the problem with rebound relationships. Take the time you need. Don't be afraid to wait.

Let the past be the past. It's over, it's done, and there is nothing that can be done to change it. There is no use dwelling on it because there is nothing that can be done about it. Don't worry about things that cannot be changed. You can't drive a car by only looking in the rear view mirror.

I'm sure there will be more to come, but these are the few I've seen myself repeat a lot in my rather short time here.

____________________________________________

This is, hands down, the best conversation I've seen about porn yet on this site: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-is-there-no-middle-ground-when-it.html

____________________________________________

Dirtball Rants:

1) What the hell happened to punctuation and grammar? I blame text messaging for the trash I see people write. It's not the content but the way it's expressed that makes me wonder what's happening to society. I realize that we're a multinational forum here, and I give a complete pass to someone who is doing their best despite the fact that English isn't their first language. But the crap I see from Americans, the British, Canadians, and Australians often makes me sick. If any of you read this, your posts would be much easier to read if you used paragraphs, sentences with punctuation, and whole words instead of abreviations like U, cuz, or wut! Quit being so fucking lazy if you want help.

2) There is a difference between the words your and you're. "Your" denotes ownership. "You're" is the contraction of "you are." Saying something like "your lame" is wrong wrong wrong! The same goes for there, their, and they're. "There" is used for things like places (look over there). "Their" denotes ownership (they wanted their cookies back). "They're" is the contraction of "they are." An example, "they're going to the service station over there to pick up their car which was just repaired." I bet that just blew your mind.

____________________________________________

Abreviations.

I use a lot of abreviations when I type advice so I'm going to start a list of the most common ones I see for use as a reference tool.

OP - Original Poster, the person asking for advice.

BF - Boyfriend

GF - Girlfriend

SO - Significant Other, your BF, GF, Fiance, or spouse in other words.

BTW - By the way

FWIW - For what it's worth

TBH - To be honest

IDC - I Don't Care

IDK - I Don't Know

IMHO - In My Humble Opinion

IMO - In My Opinion

IOW - In Other Words

THO - Titty Hard On (erect nipples)

Latest articles:

The Curse of Over Thought

This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

24 March 2011: The curse of over thought. I think many of us suffer from this curse. Some people may call it a blessing, but I tend to consider it a mixed bag. On one hand it can help lead people to some tremendous insights, on the other it can lead them do...

How Personal Bias and Gender Stereotypes can Influence Advice

This question has 40 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

19 February 2011: I write this article knowing full well it will not be received very well by some. I can only hope that this article will still be allowed due to the merits of the argument I am presenting. I have noticed on multiple occasions a prevalent double...

Why did you even ask?

This question has 22 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

25 January 2011: What brought you to Dear Cupid? Most likely it's because of some problem in your life or relationship. That's how most of us stumbled upon this place. You came here hoping that these anon people on the internet could offer you some insight into ...

Tis the season...

This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

1 December 2010: Hello Everyone. Here at Dear Cupid we receive many requests for help. Some are serious relationship problems, others aren't quite so serious. One such question is "What should I get my significant other for Christmas?" I intend to give you some ...

What ever happened to communication?

This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

17 November 2010: Having been here for a while now, I see consistancy in many of the problems people who come here face. One major problem, although it isn't usually the one that brought them here, is communication. Communication is usually the underlying problem ...

Paralyzed by not knowing

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

20 October 2010: After reading a string of questions today I started really thinking about the topic of: "do they like me back?" It happens a lot. We develop a crush on someone. We think about them a lot. We read into every little thing they do or say. We ...

Thoughts on technology and long distance relationships

This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

27 September 2010: It never fails to amaze me how many questions I see on here about long distance relationships (LDR's). I will admit, I understand the temptation. I've been there. I've tried it. I've concluded that they don't work. Still, what is it about these ...

< Prev7576777879808182838485Next > [85 pages, 3371 answers]

Girls, what does it mean when my wife takes her sexiest panties for a girls weekend?

Q.   My wife recently went for a weekend girls trip to Atlantic City. Her girlfriend is recently divorced and is on sort of a sexual rampage, where she has had sex with lots of men in what I would consider immoral circumstances (married guys, MMF, ...

A.   18 August 2010: That's awesome to hear, and thank you for the follow up. I'm very glad for you. I often think that the little things mean more than big displays like flowers and stuff. I'm glad they're working for you. I hope that you can keep it up and things ... (read in full...)

Why hasn't he responded?

Q.   I have been friends with this guy for about 6 years. We love to flirt with each other a lot and have fun talking and chatting. The only downside is that he lives far away. I’m in California and he’s in Florida. We’ve both have flown out to see ...

A.   2 August 2010: Wow, thanks for the follow up. What an idiot. Be really glad you didn't send him a naked picture. If he's trolling your friend pool, you have no idea how many people he's doing this with outside your circle as well.... (read in full...)

B/f mad because when I can't get him I text his friends!

Q.   I have been with my Boyfriend for over 2 years now and recently argueing Non stop. Its his birthday today but saturday night i cudnt get hold of him so txt one of his mates ( he is very hard to get hold of especially when hes with his friends and i ...

A.   23 July 2010: Face it, this guy isn't worth your time. He can't be bothered by anyone. He is constantly ducking plans. What's the appeal? You must like feeling unwanted. Oh well. How he treats you won't change. He's a jerk. If you continue with this ... (read in full...)

How can I go on top and make it feel good for both of us?

Q.   I not very experienced in sex and dont really know how to go on top and make it feel good for both of us.I cant go that fast either, any tip?...

A.   20 July 2010: Yes, grind and swivel, that feels amazing. Honestly, once you're on there, just do what feels good for you. I can almost guarantee that it will feel good for him too. Men are pretty easy to please in that respect. For the record, fast doesn't ... (read in full...)

We have broken up but she still talks to me, what is this?

Q.   earlier this week my girlfriend broke up with me mostly because of religious beliefs as I was black and she was white, she was suffering a lot from her side and says she doesn't want me back but still talks to me but never mentioned that we were ...

A.   20 July 2010: She's still conflicted. She sounds like she has a lot of issues, and you probably dodged a bullet. Personally, I'd tell her that if she doesn't want to be with you, then she should quit calling you. Unless you want to be friends with her now, but ... (read in full...)

I lost the love of my life to WoW and we're still in the relationship

Q.   "OP Own Title" Hello, I'd like to start off by saying that I am not an anti-gaming activist. I do not hate video games. To an extent, I am a gamer. I have a soft spot for the older Sega Genesis and Super Nintendo games and occasionally FPS and the ...

A.   20 July 2010: My best friend was addicted to WoW for a while. He's getting back into it now because of the upcoming expansion... Ugh. Whatever, it's his wasted time. In your situation, I wouldn't move in with him. He's been gradually moving further and furt... (read in full...)

Did I damage the friendship? Did I do the right thing? Was I creepy?

Q.   I have a relationship with a woman that started as a flirtation, then because of me being unavailable at the time, it turned into a close friendship. We talked about it and agreed to "just be friends" because neither of us wanted an affair. Now,...

A.   20 July 2010: I agree with Big Ron. You did what many of us in similar situations can never bring ourselves to do, tell the person how we feel. I'm guilty of harboring a crush for far too long. I wish I had the courage to take that step. Good on you for doing ... (read in full...)

What is Cybersex?

Q.   everyone talks about cybersex...what does it do...whats the point...how do you do it...can anyone please help me i really need it please. thanks...

A.   20 July 2010: Hey, one good thing about cyber or phone sex... No STD risk! :P... (read in full...)

How can my husband really love me when he wants to watch me with another man?

Q.   My husband told me that one of his fantasies is to watch me with another guy! Im not a prude by any means, but this is something that makes me wonder 1) Is he bi-curious, why else would he want another guy in the picture? 2) Does he really love me? ...

A.   20 July 2010: Another thing is that if you're excited and on board, even if it is for him, he may start to wonder why. "Does she really just want to cheat on me?" Like I said below, this is a pandora's box. I'd suggest keeping it closed.... (read in full...)

Is it because I don't look at him?

Q.   I give my fiance head sometimes but he doesnt cum... i dont understand why he wont....also when i am giving him head i feel uncomfortable looking at him while i am doing it...could that be the problem should i be looking at him? what should i do?...

A.   20 July 2010: Ditto to what everyone else said. I'm going to give a nod to strontiumdog and agree that if you can make some eye contact, it is sexy as hell. Have you told him you want him to come? Many men hold back because they don't want to gross their pa... (read in full...)

Why hasn't he responded?

Q.   I have been friends with this guy for about 6 years. We love to flirt with each other a lot and have fun talking and chatting. The only downside is that he lives far away. I’m in California and he’s in Florida. We’ve both have flown out to see ...

A.   20 July 2010: You know, instead of texts or emails, it may be time for a phone call. It is much easier to interpret words when you hear them, and you can hopefully get some real answers.... (read in full...)

When is enough punishment enough punishment?

Q.   So I have come to a fork in the road and I need some objective advice. I admit a lot of what brought me here is of my own doing. But nonetheless here goes. My wife and I have been married for 12 years and we have two girls. It was one of those war...

A.   19 July 2010: From the sounds of it, you attempted to make changes after the counceling, but she was not receptive, and didn't make an effort. Ultimately I think you answered your own question. If you've already gone through the greiving process about this ... (read in full...)

How can my husband really love me when he wants to watch me with another man?

Q.   My husband told me that one of his fantasies is to watch me with another guy! Im not a prude by any means, but this is something that makes me wonder 1) Is he bi-curious, why else would he want another guy in the picture? 2) Does he really love me? ...

A.   19 July 2010: There are things you can't see while you're in the act yourself. This is a common fantasy, however not one that I understand myself. Your concerns are valid, but I don't think they are the ones you should worry about. What happens in this kind of ... (read in full...)

Husband hooking up on facebook with a woman he once cheated with!

Q.   My husband found a female that he cheated on his ex-wife with on Facebook. They started chating a calling each other and their conversations were of a sexual nature. When I confronted him he called me a unhappy, complaining snoop. He says he loves ...

A.   19 July 2010: He's behaving inappropriately. I think that you have a right to ask him to stop contacting her since he cheated on his last wife with her. Way too much history there to ignore. Having friends on FB is one thing, but it's an entirely different ... (read in full...)

She won't have sex till she knows me better?

Q.   Hello just a quick question, what does it mean when a girl says that she won't have sex with me untill she knows me better? does this imply she's after something deeper then just a 'one night of naughtiness?' or does it mean something else?...

A.   19 July 2010: Yeah, is she worth waiting for? That's what she's looking to find out. Is it worth it to you to have a real relationship or are you just trying to get a piece? Likely she's been burned in the past by jumping into things too quickly. What are ... (read in full...)

Why isn't my husband calling when he said he would?

Q.   I’ve been married for three years and have a one year old son with my husband. We have problems the same as everyone else out there. No major problems but lots of little arguments. My husband (31) and his sister (35) took their mom (60) to New ...

A.   19 July 2010: You have a right to be upset. He told you a time he'd call, and he didn't. However, keep in mind that he is on vacation. Having recently traveled to NYC myself, I can tell you that you often get home later than planned and much more tired than ... (read in full...)

Why hasn't he responded?

Q.   I have been friends with this guy for about 6 years. We love to flirt with each other a lot and have fun talking and chatting. The only downside is that he lives far away. I’m in California and he’s in Florida. We’ve both have flown out to see ...

A.   19 July 2010: He's probably a bit scared and confused. If you do decide to send him a message, I'd send something like "I haven't heard from you in a while, just wanted to make sure everything is ok." This will reaffirm that the ball is in his court.... (read in full...)

Why does my boyfriend tell me he loves me but does not want me back?

Q.   Im 20 and so is my (ex)boyfriend. My boyfriend of nearly 3 years broke up with me a month ago. To be honest, I dont know why. We had lots of arguments and fell out but we would always get back together again because we love each other so much. ...

A.   19 July 2010: Regardless, I still think you're better off apart. Get past the "I miss you so much" phase and you'll know what I mean.... (read in full...)

My girlfriend is lazy and a bitch !

Q.   i dont kno how to put this but im 23 year old i work my ass everyday and my girlfriend she is such a bitch to everyone and shes lazy always and she always goes out and leaves the baby with me and should i just move on with my live and find someone ...

A.   19 July 2010: Yup, sounds like she checked out. I'm reminded of an Offspring song... Time for you to put your foot down. Any joint bank accounts? Close them and put them in your name ASAP. Get your affairs in order and kick her to the curb. The hardest ... (read in full...)

I've met his family does that mean he's serious?

Q.   I am going out with a guy who has just come out of a relationship. We have fondled and cuddled a lot plus shared the bed when I stopped over. Friends have commented that we are going into things too soon, but I am confused as to why. Are we really ...

A.   19 July 2010: Weird, I apologize for the double posting.... (read in full...)

I've met his family does that mean he's serious?

Q.   I am going out with a guy who has just come out of a relationship. We have fondled and cuddled a lot plus shared the bed when I stopped over. Friends have commented that we are going into things too soon, but I am confused as to why. Are we really ...

A.   19 July 2010: With regard to the "meeting the family" thing, that can really vary from person to person. Really, it's hard to say given the limited info you've provided. Your best bet is to take it slowly, and only do what you're comfortable with. Don't rush ... (read in full...)

I've met his family does that mean he's serious?

Q.   I am going out with a guy who has just come out of a relationship. We have fondled and cuddled a lot plus shared the bed when I stopped over. Friends have commented that we are going into things too soon, but I am confused as to why. Are we really ...

A.   19 July 2010: With regard to the "meeting the family" thing, that can really vary from person to person. Really, it's hard to say given the limited info you've provided. Your best bet is to take it slowly, and only do what you're comfortable with. Don't rush ... (read in full...)

Why does my boyfriend tell me he loves me but does not want me back?

Q.   Im 20 and so is my (ex)boyfriend. My boyfriend of nearly 3 years broke up with me a month ago. To be honest, I dont know why. We had lots of arguments and fell out but we would always get back together again because we love each other so much. ...

A.   19 July 2010: Maybe he finally realized that if you are constantly making up/breaking up, this isn't a relationship that is going anywhere. It is possible to love someone enough to realize that you aren't the best person for them, or that your relationship just ... (read in full...)

He wants to have sex in the bathroom??

Q.   ok so me and my bofriend want to have sex.......but the thing is hes not a virgin and i am.......he wants to do it in the bathroom and idk if i could do it in the bathroom.........and idk if i want to do it with him or not.......how would we do it ...

A.   19 July 2010: The only reason I could think of that he would want this is for ease of clean-up if you bleed when your hyman breaks. That's one thing to be prepared for, it may get messy. I still stick with my original sentiment though. It's your virginit... (read in full...)

How can I make her leave us alone?

Q.   my partner and i have been together for two and a half years so far and have a 6 month old daughter together. my partner had a gf before me but they never did anything more than kiss. we both lost our virginitys to each other. the ex didnt stop ...

A.   19 July 2010: I had a psycho ex like this too, but I never made the mistake of going back to her... All ties and communications must be cut, even if that means getting a new phone number. I'm also curious if he still texts her though.... (read in full...)

Can I be pregnant? Or just paranoid?

Q.   Ok, i have to re-write this because i lost track of my question. So, i've been having problems with my period. April i got it, May i didn't, June i did and afterwards i had sex. It was the day i was ovulating (i checked). He was wearing a condom but ...

A.   19 July 2010: With your history, it's hard to say, and nobody here will be able to give you a real answer either. If you're worried, take a pregnancy test. That's the only way you'll know.... (read in full...)

B/f mad because when I can't get him I text his friends!

Q.   I have been with my Boyfriend for over 2 years now and recently argueing Non stop. Its his birthday today but saturday night i cudnt get hold of him so txt one of his mates ( he is very hard to get hold of especially when hes with his friends and i ...

A.   19 July 2010: Yes, texting his friends is very "stalker like" behavior. I would also recommend that you do not continue to do this, as it will only drive a wedge further between you. From where I sit, I wonder why you are wasting your time. It sounds to me li... (read in full...)

What is Cybersex?

Q.   everyone talks about cybersex...what does it do...whats the point...how do you do it...can anyone please help me i really need it please. thanks...

A.   19 July 2010: Basically, dirty internet chat that you masturbate to. Think of it like phone sex with a keyboard instead of a phone.... (read in full...)

He wants to have sex in the bathroom??

Q.   ok so me and my bofriend want to have sex.......but the thing is hes not a virgin and i am.......he wants to do it in the bathroom and idk if i could do it in the bathroom.........and idk if i want to do it with him or not.......how would we do it ...

A.   19 July 2010: I say, it's your virginity, lose it where YOU want to!... (read in full...)

This sounds like borderline prostitution to me!

Q.   I recently found out my girlfriend did sexual favors for a mechanic who worked on her car. This incident(s) happened after we met, but when we were friends and before we got romantically involved. When I first met her, this guy was texting her all ...

A.   16 July 2010: "I should also mantion that 3 of the 5 guys she admits to having sex with were married. One was recently divorced. Only one guy was truly single, and that was a 2 week fling. Is this a bad trend? seems so maybe?" Was this you OP? If it was, the... (read in full...)

I really don't want to be lesbian

Q.   ok I am age between 13-15, and I love the idea of having a boyfriend, but I can wait until it will last a little longer than two weeks with someone that is right for me. Lately though, I am close to my period and I keep panicking that I am lesbian, ...

A.   16 July 2010: Ultimately, here's what I believe. Humans are sexual beings. Not gay/straight/bi, those are labels we've given ourselves because of society, and our need to label everything. There is a streak in all of us that swings a little the opposite the ... (read in full...)

We had a quickie and now he acts differently to me!

Q.   I have a friend. Last week our playful wrestling got the best of us and we ended up having a quickie, because we were in a public place and in danger of getting caught... It was really nice and there has been no awkwardness, since the incident...

A.   16 July 2010: He likes you, but is intimidated by you. You're going to need to take the lead in this. Tell him you're feeling something more for him and would like to give it a try. I sincerely doubt he'll object. ... (read in full...)

Is waking him up with a blow job a good idea?

Q.   When I stay at my boyfriends house we usually end up staying up until 4am being intimate, cuddling, or talking before he has to go back to his room. (still lives with his parents) This weekend we are both attending a party at a friend of mine's. ...

A.   16 July 2010: Oh my god yes that is a great idea! I've never been bothered by making out afterword, but if he is, brushing or mouthwash wouldn't be a bad idea. I'd gladly still make out with you after a wakeup call like this, even if the mood passes a little.... (read in full...)

My friend said he's just using me for sex!!!

Q.   i've been having a fling with a guy for 3 months, I've grown strong feelings for him, i think about him day an night, he says im too emotional and he dont do emotional talk. once he told my friend all he wanted from me is sex and im not getting ...

A.   16 July 2010: "but i really enjoyed the sex with and i wanted more from him, what he gives me i dont want him to give to sum1 else" Here's the harsh reality. WHAT YOU WANT DOESN'T MATTER TO HIM! He doesn't care. He is using you for sex. Seriously, this guy... (read in full...)

Girls, what does it mean when my wife takes her sexiest panties for a girls weekend?

Q.   My wife recently went for a weekend girls trip to Atlantic City. Her girlfriend is recently divorced and is on sort of a sexual rampage, where she has had sex with lots of men in what I would consider immoral circumstances (married guys, MMF, ...

A.   16 July 2010: Can't give the ladies perspective, but I'd tend to trust her, since she hasn't given you a real reason not to. The sexy panties are a bit of a concern, but really, not that big a deal. Anyway, I hope some of the ladies here can shed some more ... (read in full...)

Why doesn't my husband leave me alone about smoking?

Q.   I'm a smoker, and my husband doesn't like it. I don't understand why he thinks he is allowed to tell me what I can can't do. He said he likes it better when I hide it from him, but I don't see the point in having something so stupid be kept a ...

A.   16 July 2010: My guess would be the health risks. Personally, I could care less if someone smokes. You know what you're doing, and the risks, it's near impossible not to. The sad news is that this isn't something that's likely to go away. Good luck, wish I ... (read in full...)

He's now told me to "stop hassling him". Any suggestions?

Q.   Hi, I met this bloke 3 months ago on a training course and we hit it off straight away. He told me he was married, but they are separating and the house is up for sale (I know the house is for sale as my friend lives near him and the sign is ...

A.   16 July 2010: I agree with quiet-echo too. The Mod must not have liked my original post, because I said something similar, however far less eloquent. Cheating/not cheating aside. Your behavior was that of a petulent child. I've known pre-teens to act more... (read in full...)

I really don't want to be lesbian

Q.   ok I am age between 13-15, and I love the idea of having a boyfriend, but I can wait until it will last a little longer than two weeks with someone that is right for me. Lately though, I am close to my period and I keep panicking that I am lesbian, ...

A.   16 July 2010: I don't get how you "feel like you're a lesbian." That makes no sense. If you're attracted to boys, you're straight. It sounds to me like you're straight. If you were gay, you'd know it. All my gay friends did.... (read in full...)

This sounds like borderline prostitution to me!

Q.   I recently found out my girlfriend did sexual favors for a mechanic who worked on her car. This incident(s) happened after we met, but when we were friends and before we got romantically involved. When I first met her, this guy was texting her all ...

A.   16 July 2010: This isn't all that uncommon. Tit for tat favors. I've known plenty of girls to use their "femanine wiles" to get what they want. Flirting to make a sale. Flashing some cleavage to distract you from getting your pocket picked. Having "thank ... (read in full...)

Possible foot fetish?

Q.   How do you define a foot fetish, or a fetish in general? I'm not entirely sure if I have one, I mean I wouldn't mind rubbing and licking a beautiful woman's feet, but that's only how far I would go. Things like stroking my penis with her feet isn't ...

A.   16 July 2010: A fetish is something that causes strong sexual arousal in and of itself. When you see feet, do you get turned on? Just the feet. Do you want to see her feet in different shoes? Do you picture yourself rubbing and licking them? If not,... (read in full...)

My friend said he's just using me for sex!!!

Q.   i've been having a fling with a guy for 3 months, I've grown strong feelings for him, i think about him day an night, he says im too emotional and he dont do emotional talk. once he told my friend all he wanted from me is sex and im not getting ...

A.   16 July 2010: Yes, you're being used. He told you that. He is likely not replying because he is getting it from someone who isn't so attached. You got played by a player. Move on. ... (read in full...)

I'm losing my best friend, and only I feel it

Q.   I'm losing one of my closest friends, becaus he's an ex :( we have been broken up for a few months, we had a no talk period because I was finding it difficult but then I let him back in. He would call almost every night and we would hang out. Yes...

A.   16 July 2010: Ok, it is near impossible to maintain a real friendship with an ex because inevitably, one person wants the relationship to continue. If you're spending all this time together, talking all the time, going on dates, having sex, WHY DID YOU EVEN ... (read in full...)

Patience is a virtue???

Q.   I posted my situation on here a couple of weeks ago and received some great replies - thank you for these. But the situation continues so I am posting again with an update in the hope that you all may be able to help me further! A girl started...

A.   16 July 2010: In my opinion, waiting much longer isn't a good plan. You want to strike while the iron is hot (so to speak). Here's the deal. She's been with this guy for a long time. At least 2 1/2 to 3 years as I read it. That's long enough for her to know ... (read in full...)

Is she interested in me in spite of the peeing??

Q.   So I recently went to a small party with some friends and met a girl that I liked. As the party died down and everyone went to bed I found myself in the same bed as this girl, not a big deal because nothing was happening and we just went to sleep. A ...

A.   15 July 2010: Maybe. When people are drunk they will often do things they aren't proud of though. A night of drunken cuddling hardly means she's interested, unless there have been other signals. For all you know she was cuddling Brad Pitt (catch my drift). ... (read in full...)

Patience is a virtue???

Q.   I posted my situation on here a couple of weeks ago and received some great replies - thank you for these. But the situation continues so I am posting again with an update in the hope that you all may be able to help me further! A girl started...

A.   15 July 2010: Thanks Big Ron!!... (read in full...)

Patience is a virtue???

Q.   I posted my situation on here a couple of weeks ago and received some great replies - thank you for these. But the situation continues so I am posting again with an update in the hope that you all may be able to help me further! A girl started...

A.   15 July 2010: You're being used. I don't think it is malicious, or even intentional, but you give her the emotional support and connection she longs for. And so far, you haven't forced a decision, so in essence, you're encouraging this behavior on some level ... (read in full...)

*irtball's friends

These are mutual friends, so *irtball has added them and they have added *irtball!

Abella agony auntAbella
Adorskable  agony auntAdorskable
alex74 agony auntalex74
alicelin1990 agony auntalicelin1990
ally52898 agony auntally52898
Ambassadeur Koko agony auntAmbassadeur Koko
angelDlite agony auntangelDlite
ann84 agony auntann84
annasophia wyck agony auntannasophia wyck
AnneRose agony auntAnneRose
AnnieLuck agony auntAnnieLuck
aphexinfinite agony auntaphexinfinite
Artfuldodger08 agony auntArtfuldodger08
axs678 agony auntaxs678
bernicee agony auntbernicee
BlackHeart24 agony auntBlackHeart24
Blonde68 agony auntBlonde68
blondebitch07 agony auntblondebitch07
Brandee77 agony auntBrandee77
C. Grant agony auntC. Grant
cactus40 agony auntcactus40
celtic_tiger agony auntceltic_tiger
charliesdevil73 agony auntcharliesdevil73
confused32571 agony auntconfused32571
CupidsPrincess agony auntCupidsPrincess
CupidsPrincess1 agony auntCupidsPrincess1
CuteBabe agony auntCuteBabe
De la Fuente agony auntDe la Fuente
DEBB agony auntDEBB
DenimandLace44 agony auntDenimandLace44
dersita agony auntdersita
Dhamodaran agony auntDhamodaran
dirtball agony auntdirtball
Duckiies agony auntDuckiies
Ellecanhelpyou agony auntEllecanhelpyou
eyeswideopen agony aunteyeswideopen
FaddedDay agony auntFaddedDay
feefee stush agony auntfeefee stush
fi_the_tree agony auntfi_the_tree
First agony auntFirst
firstlovelastlove agony auntfirstlovelastlove
fishdish agony auntfishdish
FluffyPie agony auntFluffyPie
foolishsage agony auntfoolishsage
Gabrielle Stoker agony auntGabrielle Stoker
GeeGee255 agony auntGeeGee255
harleygirl2010 agony auntharleygirl2010
heartbroken101 agony auntheartbroken101
Honeypie agony auntHoneypie
hotinlove agony aunthotinlove
iamloyal agony auntiamloyal
Illithid agony auntIllithid
ILoveCupid agony auntILoveCupid
in?caligal agony auntin?caligal
Italian stalian agony auntItalian stalian
jacinta agony auntjacinta
jadedpearl agony auntjadedpearl
JavaJade22 agony auntJavaJade22
jenjen.270 agony auntjenjen.270
Joannesummers agony auntJoannesummers
jrns96 agony auntjrns96
justjess agony auntjustjess
kalykush agony auntkalykush
Kat_M_2011 agony auntKat_M_2011
KayK. agony auntKayK.
KeighleySky agony auntKeighleySky
KITcAThottie agony auntKITcAThottie
krit agony auntkrit
lacrymosa_652 agony auntlacrymosa_652
littlewoman agony auntlittlewoman
Longhornfan81 agony auntLonghornfan81
Love_is agony auntLove_is
lovely_menaime agony auntlovely_menaime
loveonce agony auntloveonce
lucy.whittaker agony auntlucy.whittaker
Mejersy agony auntMejersy
MelaBoo agony auntMelaBoo
Miamine agony auntMiamine
MikeJT agony auntMikeJT
missm83 agony auntmissm83
mizz.butterflies agony auntmizz.butterflies
Mjfbla agony auntMjfbla
Molly9945 agony auntMolly9945
moon river  agony auntmoon river
mr69 agony auntmr69
MsBehavin agony auntMsBehavin
myfuture agony auntmyfuture
mystiquek agony auntmystiquek
n0rfede agony auntn0rfede
Natalie:) agony auntNatalie:)
nepangue1988 agony auntnepangue1988
Newbie31 agony auntNewbie31
nicoleray143 agony auntnicoleray143
Orangeyouglad agony auntOrangeyouglad
Oregongrl1 agony auntOregongrl1
Orvus agony auntOrvus
person12345 agony auntperson12345
pixiegirls agony auntpixiegirls
Plexi agony auntPlexi
punkgirl14 agony auntpunkgirl14
raiders agony auntraiders
ReachForTheSky agony auntReachForTheSky
sammi star agony auntsammi star
Santapumpkin agony auntSantapumpkin
sexybabe13 agony auntsexybabe13
silenced agony auntsilenced
Sings_alot_chicky agony auntSings_alot_chicky
Sionell agony auntSionell
Sjroller14 agony auntSjroller14
skyfirestorm agony auntskyfirestorm
smiliek agony auntsmiliek
snactres agony auntsnactres
StarryEyes101 agony auntStarryEyes101
suitcase agony auntsuitcase
SweetSmoochy agony auntSweetSmoochy
TEM agony auntTEM
tennisstar88 agony aunttennisstar88
ThatsMyCookie agony auntThatsMyCookie
The Realist agony auntThe Realist
TimmD agony auntTimmD
tinkercharlie agony aunttinkercharlie
Tisha-1 agony auntTisha-1
Trinklett agony auntTrinklett
Undisclosed agony auntUndisclosed
vacancy agony auntvacancy
VioletSparkle agony auntVioletSparkle
walshie93 agony auntwalshie93
wanwanzhong agony auntwanwanzhong
watshername23 agony auntwatshername23
x.BrokenxHearts.x agony auntx.BrokenxHearts.x
xanthic agony auntxanthic
xLittleMoo agony auntxLittleMoo
YinAndYang agony auntYinAndYang
yomama65 agony auntyomama65
zebralove agony auntzebralove
Zuie agony auntZuie

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.3124403000038!