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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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My boyfriend and I are not connected sexually I need serious help!
Q. I fear that my boyfriend and I are not connected sexually, ie, there is no intimacy between us. We have sex the same position every time, and i rarely have an orgasm. Also, he does not give me oral sex and does not kiss me. I perform oral sex on ...
A. 20 November 2010: If there is no sexual connection, there is no boyfriend and girlfriend. This is one of the reasons why I don't wait to have sex. From the sounds of it, it's not like you started off great and then had some glitches. Either he's lazy or he has no ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend does not celebrate X-Mas and I'm hurt by his apparent disregard to my my feelings
Q. Me and my boyfriend are on the verge of breaking up over this.. He doesn't celebrate xmas, he's not from the UK, but he knows how important it is for my family to be around each other at that time, and this year has been one hell of a difficul...
A. 20 November 2010: Weird that he's Muslim, he eats bacon but wouldn't eat eggs.
If my boyfriend was Jewish I'd probably not feel the importance of celebrating Hannukah. I would feel so out of place. I was used to Christmas trees, wreaths, Santa Claus. Anything besi... (read in full...)
I like this girl but she already has a boyfriend!
Q. the thing is i like a girl in my class at college(uk) but i know she has a boyfriend. i don't know if she is happy or not with this guy i am assuming she's happy and i only know his name i haven't seen him or met him or whateverand they have been ...
A. 20 November 2010: You are both young, so relationships are not meant to last anyway. If you decide to steal her away from her boyfriend you have to prepare for rejection. You can become her friend first so she won't suspect anything. Find excuses to do activities ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend does not celebrate X-Mas and I'm hurt by his apparent disregard to my my feelings
Q. Me and my boyfriend are on the verge of breaking up over this.. He doesn't celebrate xmas, he's not from the UK, but he knows how important it is for my family to be around each other at that time, and this year has been one hell of a difficul...
A. 19 November 2010: I myself didn't grow up liking Christmas. We celebrated with family members but it wasn't like we could talk about anything. There was laughter, but it was like people HAD to come, HAD to eat the food. The younger ones play video games while the ... (read in full...)
How do I ignite the fire again?
Q. I honestly have no idea what to do. My boyfriend of 8 years (on and off) says he doesn’t feel the spark when we kiss anymore. We are both 21, and when we were 12 we met. He doesn’t feel like he could see us in the future and the pain is killing me ...
A. 18 November 2010: If you try to contain the fire, it can't burn. Let loose and calm down. The more you bind him the more he wants to run away.
"He doesn't see us in the future together." Then, "no matter what we still end up with each other." Maybe you have to be u... (read in full...)
Is she starting to like me??
Q. Well..I think I may just be paranoid, and with no one to ask I thought I'd just post it on here. My best friend of three years now has been acting differently around me these past few days. Two nights ago in mid conversation I got a text that ...
A. 18 November 2010: Maybe she's spending time with you because her boyfriend is always "busy" with other stuff. She wants someone to say I love you to. Whenever her boyfriend's not around you become the surrogate. Touching you on the arm and bumping into you aren't ... (read in full...)
Should I go on a date with her and her mom!
Q. Background- It has been almost 8 months since my last relationship and I am at the point where I am ready to be with someone again. I go to a smaller school and I met someone in my class that is really cute, funny, good looking, and has a great...
A. 18 November 2010: Don't go to the movie with her mom, even if you are a fan of that series too. It would make you look very clingy. If she doesn't want to see that movie again, then take her to another one. It doesn't have to be movies, it can be sports, or a drink, ... (read in full...)
Need critique on my love letter!
Q. Hi, I have been talking with a good friend of mine for a few weeks. We met about 3-4 years ago in college, where we hung out amongst a few friends for a couple of years. It was about half way through that I developed a crush on her, but she had...
A. 18 November 2010: I would not go the letter route. Not everybody is into long distance relationships. When you chat with her, ask her whether she had been in LDRs before, whether she believes in general, it would work. This is an indirect way of asking her out ... (read in full...)
If he didn't want to go out with me, why did he ask me in the first place?
Q. I went out on a lunch date (first date) with this guy last weekend. Everything seemed to be ok. We talked, there was very little awkward silences. For a first date, I think it went ok. During lunch, he said several times that we should do it aga...
A. 15 November 2010: Sometimes the simplest answer is the best answer. He really was caught up at work. He expressed great interest in you, but you and him are not an item yet. Imagine if he became a husband and promised to pick his son up at soccer practice, and then ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend met my ex and really liked him but doesn't know he's my ex. Do I tell him??
Q. I met two guys at the same time last year. They don't know each other. I went out with guy A but didn't feel that 'spark.' Then guy B asked me out and the spark was definitely there. So I stopped seeing guy A and started seeing guy B. After about a ...
A. 15 November 2010: You don't have to pretend you don't know Guy B. Just tell your boyfriend how much you love him, how much you are attracted to him. "I actually met Guy B before." And then just tell him how you met, no need for more details. Even if your boyfriend ... (read in full...)
He's in his 20s but his sex drive is down to nothing
Q. hey all! ive been with my boyfriend for 4yrs now, we have a 1 yr old daughter together. but the reason that im asking this embasasin question is because its bugging me! we had a fairly modern sex life up to 2 yrs ago. and now im lucky if i get it ...
A. 15 November 2010: I try to refrain from saying something that might not be true. You never mention about love, or marriage. Well true, not everybody agrees with the marriage institution. Is there some underlying, hidden issue that neither of you want to explore? Does ... (read in full...)
I am 35 and don't want to feel I have wasted my life, what on earth should I do?
Q. dear cupid. I have been in a relationship with my partner for 7 years, we have 2 children aged 5 and 2 years. The problem is that he is 42 and still lives at home with his mum, i currently live alone with my children, he looks after them a few hours ...
A. 15 November 2010: He's just occupying space and stopping you from see other guys. He thinks if he can't earn your love and admiration at least he can keep you and make you feel guilty of attempting to break family ties. You know what you should do. Make sure you do ... (read in full...)
How can I make him trust me? I love him so much!
Q. hii everyone, thanks for taking the time to read my story. :) well i am with this guy for 9 months now and i am so in love with him i just cant do anything without thinking about him. its like he is my life now, i feel him next to me whenever...
A. 15 November 2010: He's controlling your life, your self-esteem. The bugging question you have is binding you to him, and your respond to his rejection of you by holding on even stronger. Judge him by how he treats you, not by how much you have to do to gain his love. ... (read in full...)
In what way can I improve myself to become more attractive to her?
Q. About 6 months ago I got out of an awful relationship (although it was my first ever one) with a muslim girl; I'm a Hindu myself. Of course, the idea to get involved with her in the first place was not brilliant, however, I've always been ...
A. 15 November 2010: At the moment you don't know much about this girl besides her being gorgeous and that you can make her smile. The cliche is that girls fall in love with men who seduces them, act mysteriously, and not too quick to give in to their wishes on being a ... (read in full...)
I'm having an affair with my friend's husband!
Q. i have been seeing a married man for 5 months who is separated from his wife but not divorced. he has kids with her though. he says he is in love with me but i find the situation tricky because his wife was my friend. what do i do? Do i run? I am ...
A. 15 November 2010: Find out why they were separated and if they are starting the divorce soon, who has child custody, how often they visit, etc. Does separation mean having a separation agreement signed, or is it a brief thing, a need of space, a time to think and ... (read in full...)
Not knowing what skeletons my girfriend has in her closet is driving me crazy!
Q. I've been going out with my girlfriend for about a year, and we've been discussing marriage. I recently found out that my girlfriend is very worried that one or more of her former friends (my girfriend had a falling out with a couple of her fr...
A. 14 November 2010: How did you come to know about her secret? It's a bad idea to talk to her friend because you are intruding on her privacy, and any means of mending their relationship would be destroyed, all because of you. I strongly believe that there are things ... (read in full...)
My husband thinks I'm cheating because during sex I queef alot!
Q. hi i am having problems between me and my husband he thinks i am cheating which i aint but my vagina farts like just about every time we have sex i have been with him for four and half years and one partner before him but he had problems getting it ...
A. 14 November 2010: First possible reason: He's blaming and projecting his dysfunctions on you. Second possible reason: He's actually the one cheating himself, so he's accusing you to look innocent. Find out what his issues are. It could be medical, or psychological, ... (read in full...)
I can't stop this flirting!
Q. my problem is that i can't stop flirting with my colleagues, sometimes i get good response and sometimes bad. i keep falling in flirting thing, even though i'm not interested in sexual relation, i don't want and i didn't ask for any kind of rela...
A. 14 November 2010: It's an instinct just like puffing up chests, flashing your wings or tail in the animal kingdom. The human species is monogamous but people still have the desire to be alpha male or females. It's a confirmation that you are attractive, virile. It ... (read in full...)
Should I ring him, I don't want to seem needy?
Q. ok this is my first real mature relationship, with a guy, yes ive had relationships bfore but not like this, hes older then me by 9 yrs though i feel like hes my age, i dont notice the age difference except that he is very busy in business and work ...
A. 14 November 2010: You can still email him. My rule is, for every three times he phones you you phone him one time. After 5 phone calls you go out on a date. There has to be consistency, otherwise it would be like daydreaming. Ask him about the job. Get to know his ... (read in full...)
I'm disturbed by the fact that my girlfriend had a lot of sexual partners before me
Q. Hi, I am a 22 year old male and I'm currently with my girlfriend of 4 months. She is 18 years old. We have been having regular sex since we were together, and I love her very much. In fact, I love her more than anyone I've ever been with. Unti...
A. 12 November 2010: If you suspect you are clinically depressed, it makes sense to visit a psychiatrist. While it won't take away the bad thoughts, images and the number you are obsessing about, you need to dig yourself out of your hole now. You also need to explain to ... (read in full...)
I don't like being around other men like this but it is the only place I can meet my boyfriend!
Q. hi. i have a boyfriend of a few months now. he is nigerian and im romanian. colour and race difference doesnt mean anything to me and nor does it him. the proplem is i live with my parents and they dissaprove and wont let me see him. so i sneak out ...
A. 11 November 2010: The issue is not him being able to trust you, it's that you are not comfortable there and he needs to know that. Your boyfriend should protect you, feel confident enough to tell them to back off if they are out of line. Just a little thing here. I ... (read in full...)
Help! Does he like me or is he just a nice guy?
Q. I really need help! I'm in college (not sure if I needed to add that but at least it'll set a background)and there is this guy that I really really like. I've known him since last year. I'm confused because I'm not sure if he likes me or if he's ...
A. 11 November 2010: He has a very nurturing quality. I would say now he's a good friend. He found a lot of opportunities to touch you, to get close to you, but hasn't given you what you really wanted. He's not shy. Make him a cake and draw a card for him but don't ... (read in full...)
Is there any way to get rid of this girl from our lives?
Q. My boyfriend of one and a half years and me were going fine until his ex-girlfriend emerged on the scene. They were in a relationship for eight long years and broke up two to three years ago due to family issues. She used to text him once in a blue ...
A. 11 November 2010: This girl is far away and not in your lives anymore. Treat her emails as spam and delete them right away. Tell your boyfriend this is just between him and her, and that he needs not to feel any guilt. Her intention was to wreck havocs in your life ... (read in full...)
One man's whore is another man's virgin. Why is this?
Q. why does a woman, in essence, make herself a "porn star" for one man, and not another? I find this to be the case with my female fiends when they reveal that they suck and screw one partner they know won't be around in their future in every way ...
A. 11 November 2010: Many people can't mix love and sex together. Some women became fragmented. There are children who grew up and missed out on connections with mommy and daddy. It's more common to have single moms with kids than single dads with kids. So girls are ... (read in full...)
Confused!! After all the mixed signals, he now says we should be just friends
Q. hi well here is my problem ive known this guy or years we met at 9 years old and went out with eachother for a few years, then when i was 13 i moved away. when i was 27 i bumped into him again we are both married with children we were friends and...
A. 11 November 2010: He wanted to find out if he could do a better job than your husband but your response showed him that he's just a typical, clueless guy who couldn't crack the marriage code, make a woman happy. An affair is not the most beautiful thing. You should ... (read in full...)
I know this sounds stupid but I would like to spend the holidays with him, but I can't.
Q. Okay so me and my boyfriend have been together for 4 months. Before we even started dating his sister decided that she didn't like me because I am 10 years younger than him. I have still never met her or any other member of his family. He lives in ...
A. 9 November 2010: You can't bring him to meet your family? After the holidays there would be fewer reasons to see him. His sister didn't like his ex-girlfriends because she caught them making out when she came home. So he made up this story which sounds like she is ... (read in full...)
I get myself into some pretty crazy situations.
Q. Basically , I'm having sex with a cop. I thought it was going to be a one time thing when we met butt it wasn't, and now I'm head over heals for the guy.... I'm 1, 18 in a month and a half. he thinks I'm 19. I plan to tell him when I do turn 18 ...
A. 9 November 2010: So you want to turn this clandestine affair into something real. First you have to make sure he's single and is interested in a relationship. Start with light conversations. There is no point in starting a relationship if you can't even talk to each ... (read in full...)
She says she loves me but isn't in love with me
Q. hi i need help i think my relationship is coming to a close but im finding it realy hard to deal with. i want to try and get things back how they were, she says she loves me but she says she's not in love with me. i said if i loved her id let...
A. 9 November 2010: There wasn't a lot of info on what made her fell out of love. That line has been used too many times and said at in reaction to something emotional. If she really wanted the relationship with work, saying something like that was mind blowingl... (read in full...)
Where's this relationship going?
Q. Where's this relationship going? I met a guy from a post I made on a listing site. Basically I wanted to go out/hang with someone. He seems decent and respectable. I dont know him well, he could be a total creep honestly (glass half full). But he ...
A. 8 November 2010: If this is your first experience, you probably wouldn't expect it to be long term, at the same time you don't want to be used either. It's nice that he can give you experience and he hasn't told you he would have a problem with that. You may say now ... (read in full...)
I Can't let my escort/girlfriend go...
Q. I don't know where or how to start. I am so emotionally messed up. I'm 40 years old and I met this girl who is an escort and fell in love with her. The first time I slept with her I knew nothing about her life of prostitution. She was a 27 year old...
A. 7 November 2010: Usually relationships with ex prostitutes are highly discouraged. There is too much drama and lack of trust. It takes an angel to show her how to love a man properly. She has been trained to fake love with her clients so it's impossible to tell if ... (read in full...)
How to get closure from a sociopath ex?
Q. I have been driven to the point of almost insanity because my ex could not be honest. I later found out he was extremely sociopathic, was a pathological liar, and that every time I had an instinct that he was not telling me the truth about ...
A. 7 November 2010: Oxymoron question. You get closure because he is indeed a sociopath, and an ex of yours, and he will never change. You can't reason with him. You can understand sociopaths by reading books about them. You sacrifice too much by being a guinea pig of ... (read in full...)
Is he giving me a hidden message/hint or is what he's saying legitimate?
Q. Been seeing a married man for the past 10 mths. He has broken up with me three times (he rekindles us each time after a few weeks). He’s stuck on the theory that it’s unfair and selfish of him to expect me to wait around for him when he’s home with ...
A. 7 November 2010: If he's that considerate he would have gone to marriage counselling with his wife. He doesn't need you to proove yourself, that's just relinquishing responsibility. All he needs is man up, leave this affair and start to make ammends with his wife ... (read in full...)
Nightclub questions for the ladies.
Q. Hi everyone, I've just signed up here so this is my very first post. Probably wont be my last though! :o). I'm curious for the female perspective on this, but i'd welcome feedback from anyone. I'm 32 and been been single for 2 years now, so ...
A. 7 November 2010: I don't go to clubs myself. It won't matter if you hang around with females or males. The important is that after you picked one chick, you focus your attention on her, get to know her, then introduce her to your friends. If she is deep, she would ... (read in full...)
Why do I feel so guilty about watching porn by myself?
Q. My partner and I both watch porn but I prefer to watch it seperately as i feel uncomfortable watching it with my partner and i like to be soley with him when we are together. i know he would like to watch it together but he doesnt press me to watch ...
A. 7 November 2010: Because you know that the young actresses were sacrificing their beauty and innocence for money. When you are with your partner you focus on you and his pleasure but by yourself, it is like a woman to woman thing, and you can't help but wonder what ... (read in full...)
Why can women leave me and move on so quickly?
Q. Were do I start? My ex of 6 years finally got tired of me and left me. She has another man in her life now, I see them together on facebook. We have a little girl together only 2 years old, she already has the new guy around my little girl. Our ...
A. 7 November 2010: 1. You put her down too many times. She is desperate for someone to love her, and respect her. She is not going to allow the breakup to make the rest of her life suck.
"She never had a job" is a bit of an exaggeration. You moved in with her know... (read in full...)
Her boobs are amazing!!!
Q. I am an arab man (but also a christian). the rules and traditions in my country told men to treat women except their wives as sisters (with no sexual feelings) and told women not to wear sexy clothes. of course man and woman can do whatever...
A. 7 November 2010: You have an Arab and Christian background. Although nowadays people are liberal it's not going to change a mind with thousand years of conditioning, that wives are sexy only to their husbands. You know you can't have her so that makes her more ... (read in full...)
How do I be confident around girls?
Q. Hi guys. I've been waiting for soo long, everyone tells me to wait, the right girl will come. That was almost three or four years ago. I'm sick and tired of this. Some advice on how to be confident around girls would be appreciated. THanks!...
A. 7 November 2010: I will say not wait and just get out there and enjoy yourself. The right girl is not going to come to you just because you are patient. Confidence comes from experience, both good and bad. The longer you wait, the longer you would be labelled ... (read in full...)
Please help me. My life has become a battle of obsession and survival
Q. hello all i am sorry its bit long but pleaseeee read this for god heaven's sake..i am going through a lot of heartache at present. my LDR ex girlfriend(18) left me a year ago and i am still pining over the loss.sometimes i think she was young to...
A. 7 November 2010: What you need here is some kind of explanation. When I was your age I was "guilty" for liking someone else. I too was very in love with my first boyfriend. We went separate ways for the summer because we are from different countries. I met other ... (read in full...)
I think my female student has a lesbian crush on me
Q. I think one of my female students has a crush on me, I am a lesbian and she may have heard that somewhere I’m not sure. I need to tell her that I don’t have feelings for her. I’m not sure whether I should of if I should just wait for it to pass. ...
A. 6 November 2010: There is nothing you have to say because teachers are not supposed to have feelings for students. If you bring up the relationship subject with her, it only gives her more reason to stay after class with you. It would be talking for the sake of ... (read in full...)
His actions don't make any sense. Should I wait or move on?
Q. Okay this may be a little long but bear with me please. My ex boyfriend is 9 years older than I am. I am 21 he is 30. He has a pituitary tumor and low testosterone so he pretty much looks and acts 21. Anyways, it took us a long time to get together...
A. 6 November 2010: If it doesn't make sense to you it would make less sense to a stranger. The shots could affect his cognitive ability and concentration. He doesn't give you stability and the last thing you want is to be pregnant, taking care of the baby alone and ... (read in full...)
Whats up with this mysterious guy?
Q. It is Friday night and I am sitting home with tears. I had two offers for dates tonight, (both with advanced degrees) I am in love with someone who I can not have. Well, I should say he is shy. His body language says one thing and he does something ...
A. 6 November 2010: Maybe if you knew him you wouldn't be in love anymore. I assume the last time you saw him was more than 2 weeks ago. Don't give too much credit for psychologists. They are well read. They know how to talk to their patients but when it comes to ... (read in full...)
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