A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Background- It has been almost 8 months since my last relationship and I am at the point where I am ready to be with someone again. I go to a smaller school and I met someone in my class that is really cute, funny, good looking, and has a great personality. I have been wanting to ask her out for a while now and I have been taking my time - waiting for the right moment etc. Also I wanted to get to know her a bit before I do anything hasty. Nothing is worst than an overbearing person when asking someone out (or being awkward). When we are alone at school, we both laugh at each others jokes, have pretty awesome conversations, and are on the same page with our thoughts. She laughs even when I think my jokes are dumb. She got out of a relationship about 5 months ago fyi. So I finally decided to go for it today, as we both like a certain movie coming out. I went up to her and asked if she was going to see the movie this weekend. She said yes and she was going to see it with her mom. (both big fans of this movie and they have seen everyone together since the beginning of the series) She knows I love the series and she invited me to join her if I wanted. I'm thinking of saying yes.Now - I know this isn't a date. I am just trying to figure out if this could be a jump off point to seeing her alone on a real date. Question 1 - How should I act with her mom there? Suggestions? I am not a shy guy and I want to make a good impression.Question 2- I know this girl is single and isn't dating anyone right now. How can I move from this movie experience to a date with her.Question 3- What should I be looking for to tell if I am just a friend - or more than that? I'm terrible at reading signals. Question 4 - What can I do to show I'm not just a friend and I am interested?One last detail - when she invited me - she said she might be seeing the movie 2 times- I'm not completely sure if she said that because she wanted to go alone with me. This only came up after she invited me and she was originally going once this weekend.Perhaps I'm reading into this way too much but either way - Please help me understand what I should be thinking.Thanks for reading and please give as much advice as you can.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell I read all of your answers. I am just going to go and have a good time/make a good impression. Then Il just ask her on a real date later. I don't plan on making moves if another family member is there - its just bad taste.
As an alternative - I am going to tell her I cant make it and change the day to see it- so I avoid any situation with the family member and I can still see it with her alone.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (18 November 2010):
 Don't go to the movie with her mom, even if you are a fan of that series too. It would make you look very clingy. If she doesn't want to see that movie again, then take her to another one. It doesn't have to be movies, it can be sports, or a drink, a walk in the shopping mall. You should never make it so obvious that it is an official date, "I would do this, do that, show you I'm a gentleman, I will never hurt you, I would wait for you to be ready, etc". This is all so suffocating and too cosy for comfort. I would rather prefer the go with the flow, the more relaxed, sensual approach to getting to know the opposite sex better. You should be the one leading the dance, not her.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (18 November 2010):
 Q1. Act yourself but omit curse words, be a real gentleman, holding the door open, offering to purchase popcorn and drinks for everyone, maybe even the tickets. Leave a lasting impression on her mother.
Q2. Simple, you ask her out on a date. There's no nonchalant way to go about it, you just go for the kill.
Q3. Well if you go with her mother, there's not going to be much contact..it's going to be just friends. If she touches your arm with hers, snuggles a little in her seat closer to your side. Look for lingering physical contact.
Q4. Physical contact, touch her arm, lean more over on her side on the arm rest, prop your arm around the back of her seat. That's while you're in the movie. Outside of the movie, it's best to be straight forward and tell her you're interested. I can't tell you how many questions we get on here for asking if these signs or signals mean he's interested. It would be much easier if everyone cut the crap and just admitted their feelings.
Before you go with her mother, I would ask her who she is going with to see the second showing. Ask her if it would be better if you and her went to see it together? Play it off as you don't want to be imposing on mother-daughter time. Good luck! And be yourself!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2010): Well I'm only 14 but I will try my best to help you out on this. And I haven't had much experiance with guys but my friends have so I observe evrything they do together. Well I think you should go on a date with her and her mom because it will help grow a strong bond between parent and boyfriend. And when you ask her out on a movie date did she smile and blush when you said that or did she was like yea fine okay? If she was all sweet about it it could mean she is really excited to go to a movie with you and it can also mean she really likes you. Be a perfect gentlemen when her mom is there like open the doors for the both of them help them carry the food into the movies. Shake hands with her mom to let her mom know that you are not scared to be there but mostly excited because your girl is there. And well since her mom is going to be there maybe when her mom leaves in the middle of the movie to go get or do something then ask the girl out it would be a very sweet way to ask a girl out. Now most moms are strict on the cusssing deal so try not to let the cussing deal slide to much unless her mom cusses like crazy but be careful about the things you say to your girl infront of her mom. hmm signs.....well blushing, smiling alot, laughing at your jokes you don't find funny,sitting or leaning really close to you. Well but if she is shy to make the first move then don't be afraid to do it like if she says yes into going out with you but her hand is in her lap, grab it very gentley and slowly so you don't scare her. Trust me I'm one of the shy girls so I know what could be running through her head. And don't kiss her right away give it a few days you will know when she is ready to kiss you if she has been staring at you for a very long time while you two are standing up and is smiling, then carefully and slowly kiss her. Also if she gives you really long hugs and maybe a compliment that means she could be feeling very strong for you. Hope everything goes good for the two of you:]
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