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This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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Is it wrong for a woman to ask a man out?
Q. I have another question, is it wrong for woman to ask man out on a date? Does it start a cycle of a woman taking the male role in the relationship?...
A. 9 October 2009: It is not bad to ask a man out. It is a great thing to do. I can see why a woman wouldn't want to do it (check what Ask Oldersister wrote), but personally I don't find it bad, in itself.... (read in full...)
Will he forgive me for cheating?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for several years. We live together, and have for the past 3 years. After years of being together, I cheated on him. I am not going to make any excuses. I know what I did was wrong. I knew it when I did it. ...
A. 9 October 2009: We can't really tell whether he will forgive you or not. It is a difficult thing to forgive, however, and your telling him will change the relationship between you two, maybe forever.
Have you stopped to think why you cheated?... (read in full...)
Is this a sign of possessiveness?
Q. Hi, I've been out with this guy about 10 times. However, I wouldn't consider us to be "in a relationship" yet. Well, I just recently got out of a physically mentally and emotionally abusive relationship, so I'm really sensitive about things. Wh...
A. 9 October 2009: I believe that he called you "my lady" because he has feelings for you. This is not to say that he's possessive, or that he's not. It's just a sign that he likes you. I do think there might be a problem here, because he thinks he "has you" and ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to be aroused by a girl who you simply don't see the sex appeal of?
Q. I have a new girlfriend and she is great. She is beautiful, funny, cool and I am really proud to introduce her to my friends and family as my new girl. I have literally never dated a girl I feel such a strong connection with. Everything should be ...
A. 9 October 2009: "I feel pressurized and unworthy". That's your problem.
I say, persist in trying to have sex. Some people hold it to have some rewards, you know?
Tell her you've never had anyone, and I have the feeling that she will feel like remedying such a... (read in full...)
Semen leakage normal?
Q. Whenever I get sexually aroused due to my girlfriend in university or wherever, a drop or two of semin from my penis leaks. Is that normal? I workout 2 hours every day and do not masturbate more than twice a month. I haven't done sex as well uptill ...
A. 29 September 2009: The "leak" is perfectly normal, and perfectly harmless. Enjoy.... (read in full...)
Ask him out? Or wait for him to ask me out?
Q. Hi everyone. Simple question- should i ask out a guy that i like or wait for him to ask me out? We are friends and a few of my friends say there is a chance he likes me from some of his behaviour. I don't want to jeapordise the friendship but w...
A. 29 September 2009: I think Oldersister is so right. This is also a way to spare you the embarrasment.... (read in full...)
What is this supposed to mean?
Q. How can you tell if this is real or something else . Met a girl at work a couple years ago . We talked once in awhile , mostly about nothing . Then one day we were going by each other and she stuck out her pinky to shake pinkies . Well that little ...
A. 28 September 2009: Sorry, this means she is not interested. Sorry again if this seems blunt, but the best thing you can do is move on.... (read in full...)
Is it ok to have a passionate kiss on a first date?
Q. Is it ok to kiss a guy on the mouth the first date or will he think I'm a whore ? Thanks for any input you can give I have an upcoming date with this guy I have only met once and he is really cute. So naturally I want to kiss him lol ! ...
A. 24 September 2009: Yep, I say it's OK to kiss passionately, ardently, earth-shatteringly in a first date.
Wow, how I envy this guy, and he hasn't even been kissed yet.
Oldersister, you're a bad girl.... (read in full...)
Having an affair with a married woman. She's hesitant about leaving incase we don't work out, and I've tried to stop contacting her but it doesn't work! What can I do?
Q. Im madly in love with a women who's been married to this guy for 8 years and they have 3 kids in common. Im in a situation were I live with my mom and sis and they pretty much depend on me financial wise, she was actually my mom's friend and that's ...
A. 14 September 2009: Sorry, buddy.
You did the right thing in changing your phone number. Move on with your life. Eventually you will get over this, and find someone new.... (read in full...)
He cheated on me. He doesn't know I cheated on him too. Should I tell him?
Q. My boyfriend has cheated on me twice and I've forgiven him both times because he came out and told me I didnt have to find out or any other immature things involved. While he was cheating on me I kinda felt that something was going on so I cheated ...
A. 11 September 2009: Yes, I am afraid he will leave you once he knows he was cheated on. That is human nature: you want to be forgiven, but then you have trouble forgiving the very thing they forgave you for.
So, don't tell him. I suppose you did this out of reven... (read in full...)
Since we had sex for the first time last week I keep getting sexual urges!
Q. My girlfriend and i have sex for the first time last week, the night before I went on holiday. Ever since ive been on holiday I get sexual urges and every girl I see looks like my girlfriend, why is this? Also Ive never been able to give my girlfrie...
A. 11 September 2009: As to the urges, it only means you're a normal guy. If we made a survey about how many males felt that way after they finally "scored", I guess the whole internet would not have the capacity to store all the "Yeah, I felt that way, too"'s. Just ... (read in full...)
What did he mean by wanting me to be submissive?
Q. My question is, what are dominant male and submissive female relationships all about. I was dating a dominant male who says I wasn't submissive enough and that I always had something to say. What did he mean? We hung out for 6 weeks and when I ...
A. 11 September 2009: He means he wants you to be his slave. Also, you very much scared him :-).... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about my girlfriend's friendship with all these men, or is it all in my mind?
Q. My Girlfriend has lots of male friends and I need to know If I am losing my mind about this situation or have reason to feel somewhat let down. I started seeing someone who I used to go it with for over a year (4 years ago) two months back. We ...
A. 10 September 2009: You're confused because you love her and feel that taking this crap is a small price to pay. Think about it. You're a free man to decide whatever you want. That said, be aware that you are in pain, and you will continue to live in pain. This is ... (read in full...)
Is is ever ok to cheat?
Q. Ok, so I know it is wrong, but I am asking anyway....Is it ever ok to cheat. I am in a relationship, and have been for the past 6 years. The man I am cheating with is also in a relationship, for the past 3 years. We are together because it is ...
A. 9 September 2009: No.
We are weak beings, and anyone can let him or herself get carried away. But, though it can sometimes be understood as human weakness, it is never right.
You give little information on your post. From what I see, you two are cheating bec... (read in full...)
First man ever to not want oral sex! Why?
Q. I'm obsessing over this the whole day. I am in my early 30's, and by all accounts a skilled lover, so when I was with a man last night with whom I had been intimate with before and with whom we had simply amazing, mind blowing and most intimate lo...
A. 8 September 2009: Yes, we understood what you meant by "religious", as religions frowning on oral sex. I meant that, religions notwithstanding, oral sex continues to happen, doesn't it? So don't think that religion had any role in this. :-).... (read in full...)
Does how he signed my birthday card have any special meaning to it?
Q. This is actually a pretty stupid question.But one that I would like some opinions on. Today was my birthday.I spent the day with somebody that I have been seeing for about 7 months.We have not talked about commitment and love and all of that.We ...
A. 8 September 2009: You might be onto something. Just be careful.... (read in full...)
He's perfect for me apart from the sex...
Q. I had been dating and intimate with the same man for over a year. He is quite a bit older than me. The sex is over-the-top, yet I backed out of our engagement due to some issues of his that seem to be unresolvable (financial, family, baggage, etc). ...
A. 8 September 2009: I think you should not go back to Guy n° 1, because you don't love him. Stay with Speedy, and kindly let him know that he needs to last a bit more.
I remember that SatinDesire (a great agony aunt) posted something about clitoral stimulat... (read in full...)
First man ever to not want oral sex! Why?
Q. I'm obsessing over this the whole day. I am in my early 30's, and by all accounts a skilled lover, so when I was with a man last night with whom I had been intimate with before and with whom we had simply amazing, mind blowing and most intimate lo...
A. 8 September 2009: Something is the matter, yes, but I am afraid we can't know. Maybe he was just busy or had to go somewhere.
I wonder if you did have other forms of sex before you offered oral.
P.S.: Religious men like oral sex, too :-).... (read in full...)
Is this just a nice way of him breaking up with me?
Q. My boyfriend wants to break up for now. Here is the deal. We went to the same college for one semester and it was amazing. We did everything together. Then I transfered to a school about 2 hours away and the first semester was hard but it work...
A. 8 September 2009: I am with Dearkelja.... (read in full...)
Am I asking for too much?
Q. Are my expections from a relationship too high? Or maybe too low? What I want is, someone who respects me and accepts me for being who I am- conservative, quiet, shy and reserved at times. Someone who accepts my values of wanting to wait for sex ...
A. 8 September 2009: I am sorry if this offends you in any manner. I will try not to offend. I am apologizing in advance in case I do.
I agree that drinking and smoking is bad, and lying is worse, and pretending to be someone you're not is even worse. I don't me... (read in full...)
I want to suggest my ex that we be F Buddies, but how?
Q. hi all my girlfriend and i have recently finished, on good terms i must add. like we are still going on hloiday together and things. i dont want to try and have another relationship with her, but i also dont want anyone else. i was wonde...
A. 8 September 2009: No. She broke up with you. Meaning she doesn't want that anymore.... (read in full...)
Am I too big up top? My partner said I could do with losing a little weight!
Q. Hi, Guys, can I ask you a question I am a size UK 8, I think a US size 6 on my bottom half, my top half is a 34D UK size Is this good, I mean am I too big up top??? 34 D, good size or too much??? as my partner has said maybe I need ...
A. 7 September 2009: That is to say, you're OK.... (read in full...)
Am I too big up top? My partner said I could do with losing a little weight!
Q. Hi, Guys, can I ask you a question I am a size UK 8, I think a US size 6 on my bottom half, my top half is a 34D UK size Is this good, I mean am I too big up top??? 34 D, good size or too much??? as my partner has said maybe I need ...
A. 7 September 2009: Don't go changing to try to please me,
you never let me down before,
don't imagine you're too familiar
and I don't see you anymore...
I would not leave you in times of trouble
We never could have come this far
I took the good times I'll tak... (read in full...)
Why doesn't she want anyone to see us being affectionate in public?
Q. I have been dating a woman for over a year, she is a mom of three. Her kids are 17, 20, 25. In the beginning, she would show affection in public, in the car, anywhere with no mind to anyone, thing etc. We even got busy outside her oldest daughters ...
A. 7 September 2009: Or, she's turning you down?... (read in full...)
I wish I was asexual.
Q. Is there any cure to help me with this disease that's called "hetrosexuality"? Can it be cured by medication or psychotherapy? This is not a joke, I hate my sexuality. During my teenage years I often thought about being castrated, to cu...
A. 7 September 2009: Also, not to disrespect anyone, but traditionally these feelings are there when something is the matter with you. Wanting to sleep with someone is very natural (and enjoyable); so is dating, et cetera. But everyone knows that. So, I think you ... (read in full...)
I wish I was asexual.
Q. Is there any cure to help me with this disease that's called "hetrosexuality"? Can it be cured by medication or psychotherapy? This is not a joke, I hate my sexuality. During my teenage years I often thought about being castrated, to cu...
A. 7 September 2009: Yep, there is a way. Castration. But you don't want that.... (read in full...)
I want to suggest my ex that we be F Buddies, but how?
Q. hi all my girlfriend and i have recently finished, on good terms i must add. like we are still going on hloiday together and things. i dont want to try and have another relationship with her, but i also dont want anyone else. i was wonde...
A. 7 September 2009: If the girl is smart, she will see your offer as "let's break up but sleep around". I am sure she will see the "no strings attached" thing, and will run away from the deal. She could lose everything and gain little, if anything.
I think it's a b... (read in full...)
Does he regret breaking up with me in the heat of the moment?
Q. My ex bf broke up with me a month ago. Since then he has been messaging me quite a few times throughout the week, calling me etc, saying how he I am beautiful and how he still cares about me and that he is wanting to see how I am etc. And just ma...
A. 7 September 2009: Quite often people like something in you, are very attracted to that something, and then want to change you into something "better", in their humble (or not so humble) opinion. I am sure he liked you very much.
On the other hand, I don't think th... (read in full...)
Am I asking for too much?
Q. Are my expections from a relationship too high? Or maybe too low? What I want is, someone who respects me and accepts me for being who I am- conservative, quiet, shy and reserved at times. Someone who accepts my values of wanting to wait for sex ...
A. 7 September 2009: I agree with Baby Duck, but have one thing to say myself.
You define your relationships as "good you" and "bad them". I am sure these guys had some redeeming value, or they wouldn't have been of any interest to you. I think you're not looking ... (read in full...)
Does he regret breaking up with me in the heat of the moment?
Q. My ex bf broke up with me a month ago. Since then he has been messaging me quite a few times throughout the week, calling me etc, saying how he I am beautiful and how he still cares about me and that he is wanting to see how I am etc. And just ma...
A. 7 September 2009: I guess that the reasons behind the breakup are what matters. Why did he have to make a decision, in the first place? Why did you ask him to make a decision then? I assume there was a lot of coming and going before that. Can you explain?
On th... (read in full...)
Can you harm yourself by masturbating too much?
Q. Hi. I enjoy masturbating and find myself doing it perhaps 2 or 3 times a day. I am 16 years old and i'm extreamly horny all the time. I am worried if i masturbate too much then something might happen to me. Will anything happen and have i got ...
A. 7 September 2009: Click on this:
http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=100371
... (read in full...)
Do all guys want their girlfriends to be "one of the guys"?
Q. Do all guys want their gf's to be 'one of the guys'? By this, I mean do guys want their gfs to behave and act like their male friends? Do they want their gfs to get completely drunk off their face with all their friends? Do they want their gf's to ...
A. 7 September 2009: Moderator: Can you re-post my post, without the "nagging"?... (read in full...)
Do other people keep secrets from their parents?
Q. just out of curiousity, do lots of other ppl keep keep many secrets from their parents? i have been in a relationship with a guy for almost a year and a half now and we were very close friends before. i can't tell my parents anything about it ...
A. 6 September 2009: I believe everyone has kept secrets from parents. However, what you're referring to here is a different thing: you're living a double life, which is way more than just "keeping secrets". You shouldn't have to hide that aspect of your life. It is ... (read in full...)
She's expecting more than just friendship
Q. About one month ago I met a really nice woman online. We hit it off and have been writing several e-mails daily. I lead her to believe I also wanted to eventually become more than just her friend. Now she insists on getting together but I now feel ...
A. 6 September 2009: Tell the truth.... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about my girlfriend's friendship with all these men, or is it all in my mind?
Q. My Girlfriend has lots of male friends and I need to know If I am losing my mind about this situation or have reason to feel somewhat let down. I started seeing someone who I used to go it with for over a year (4 years ago) two months back. We ...
A. 6 September 2009: Just for the sake of comment: Code Warrior mentioned three possible ways the girl could behave. I would add a fourth: cheating without the poster knowing, as in "being played for a fool". I am sure this is what the poster has a problem with. We ... (read in full...)
Simple question: how can one end a relationship without the hurt?
Q. how can u breakup with somebody without it hurting you or the other person ...
A. 5 September 2009: The simple answer was given by Rhythm: "You can't unless it is mutual". And I will add, "and both are so sick of it that they don't feel any pain at all in leaving".... (read in full...)
Is it a bad sign if your boyfriend has pictures of his ex but not you?
Q. Is it a bad sign that I am not in a good relationship if the guy I have been dating for almost 4 months still has pictures of his ex on his computer and facebook but none of me anywhere? I can deal with him having pictures of her on his computer but ...
A. 5 September 2009: Yep, it does seem odd. I assume there have been many chances for him to have your picture. And, if they broke up, perhaps he could keep a few pictures, but not keep them on display. It does sound bad.... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about my girlfriend's friendship with all these men, or is it all in my mind?
Q. My Girlfriend has lots of male friends and I need to know If I am losing my mind about this situation or have reason to feel somewhat let down. I started seeing someone who I used to go it with for over a year (4 years ago) two months back. We ...
A. 5 September 2009: I don't know if she's into something with these guys or not. I do agree that she seems to be acting as if she were single. And I do have a bad feeling about it. The bad thing is that you have no "proof" of anything. I think you should try to get ... (read in full...)
How do I move on from an LDR who I thought was Mr right..?
Q. How do u move on from a long term relationship after you break up with the one who you felt was mr right. Obviously i get the point that if he was mr right then we would still be together but some things are 1 sided. I might not be mrs right for him ...
A. 2 September 2009: Sometimes we need to give up on someone we absolutely love, either because the relationship is impossible or because the other person doesn't feel like continuing it. In either case, keeping the relationship alive is beyond our possibilities. We ... (read in full...)
So my FWB wants me to get pregnant. I'm not interested in having kids. What is going on here?
Q. I've been in a friend with benefits "situation" with a guy for 2 years now, and so far everything has been good. Last month he said he wanted me to stop taking my birth control so I can get pregnant. I don't know what 2 think. Is he seriously ...
A. 2 September 2009: I think he's an irresponsible man, and you shouldn't trust him to stay with you if you became pregnant. If you give in, YOU will be pregnant. You won't be able to run away from the responsibility, but he will. I wouldn't count on his stayin... (read in full...)
I won't go out with him if he has a girlfriend; he doesn't want to risk breaking up with her in case I won't go out with him after.
Q. I started a new job around 6 months ago, got on well with everyone. There was a guy who started like poking me and pulling my hair, not nastily, but in a fun way. I thought he liked me or something, until I was told he had a girlfriend, who actually ...
A. 2 September 2009: My two cents: don't go out with that guy again. He's trying to play you.
Trying to get involved with someone else while you're with somebody is called cheating. While I can understand that the world isn't square and people will sometime... (read in full...)
Having an affair with a married woman. She's hesitant about leaving incase we don't work out, and I've tried to stop contacting her but it doesn't work! What can I do?
Q. Im madly in love with a women who's been married to this guy for 8 years and they have 3 kids in common. Im in a situation were I live with my mom and sis and they pretty much depend on me financial wise, she was actually my mom's friend and that's ...
A. 24 August 2009: Erick Gómez, leave the woman alone and move on. I know this seems so bad for you, but I honestly believe this is the best advice you can receive.
I am sure you have not thought so, but your getting involved with a married woman is wrong in sever... (read in full...)
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