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This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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Meeting online companion, AND his whole family?!
Q. I badly need advise before I materialize my plans. I met this guy exactly 5 months ago online as a way of coping up with a break-up. Anyway, he is younger than me by 7 years and at first we were just chatting out of boredom, I didn't even care...
A. 13 May 2010: Xearo is right.... (read in full...)
I don't mind helping someone get on their feet, but I don't want to be taken for a fool.
Q. I have started seeing a man 22 and i'm 43. It started well but he asks me for five or ten dollars here or there and i pay for our dates since i have a full time job and his is part time. He is looking for a full time job also to get a car and we ...
A. 12 May 2010: Soon, you need to get yourself some glasses pretty soon. No offense meant.
Poster, think of him as dead weight you're dropping.... (read in full...)
Changing his passwords on his accounts--says its "his business not mine"
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together a year, living together for 6 months. Last week he changed his hotmail and facebook passwords out of no where. He says its his business and none of mine. Why the sudden change? Should I be worried something is ...
A. 10 May 2010: If he used to give you free access to his accounts, and then you did "one little thing" here and "another teeny tiny little thing" there, then, as Red Green 0289 says, maybe he got upset over those "little" things and decided he would not give you ... (read in full...)
Does his friend's reaction mean that this guy likes me?
Q. I have a huge crush on a guy. We get on very well and often smile at each other and generally are really comofrtable around each other. Sometimes I sense he might like me as well but like me he's hesitant to show it. One day we were talking and...
A. 10 May 2010: Yes. It's also a sign that, if he does, he's not exactly handling it well.... (read in full...)
Why is she telling me that other women are checking me out?
Q. Ok so my girlfriend and I go out to clubs and go dancing. We both love to dance and have a great time. One thing that drives me crazy is that she keeps telling me about other girls that are checking me out. I am there do dance with her. I dont ...
A. 10 May 2010: Sometimes, those comments that women make out of the blue don't seem to have a purpose but they do have a hell of a lot of a purpose. Sometimes women test you, and my feeling is that this is one of such tests. If it is a test, I don't really know ... (read in full...)
She has a long distance boyfriend but she flirts with me
Q. I like this girl a lot. We flirt each other, texting, hang out, talking on the phone. She told me that she is in a long distance relationship with a guy 2 yrs. She doesnt want to give up but it makes her tired now. She keeps sending me signals ...
A. 9 May 2010: I'm not a girl either, but I don't think you should go for another guy's girl. And then maybe she's just flirting. So move on and find someone else.... (read in full...)
I don't mind helping someone get on their feet, but I don't want to be taken for a fool.
Q. I have started seeing a man 22 and i'm 43. It started well but he asks me for five or ten dollars here or there and i pay for our dates since i have a full time job and his is part time. He is looking for a full time job also to get a car and we ...
A. 9 May 2010: Sorry, but he seems to be using you.... (read in full...)
Meeting online companion, AND his whole family?!
Q. I badly need advise before I materialize my plans. I met this guy exactly 5 months ago online as a way of coping up with a break-up. Anyway, he is younger than me by 7 years and at first we were just chatting out of boredom, I didn't even care...
A. 9 May 2010: Why do you think he wants to take advantage of you? Can't he be a simple, somewhat disoriented fellow who fell for you?... (read in full...)
Is my co-working seeing me only because I'm convenient?
Q. A male co-worker of mine (a good looking, fun loving, church going, very nice guy) was having major issues with his marriage. His wife had become a hypochondriac, never wanted to do much of anything, and was basically boring. He had brought his ...
A. 8 May 2010: I agree with Lola about your having to think what it is that YOU want. I don't think I could ever guess what the matter is with him, but he seems to give way too much importance to his marriage for a man who claims wanting to be with you. I think ... (read in full...)
We are in love but afraid to be with each other
Q. I meet the man of my dreams 2 years ago. From the very first night we met we have talked ever single night without fail for 3 to 5 hours depending on the day and work. We have become best friends. We talk about our future all the time. It's a ...
A. 8 May 2010: I think you need to take what they call "a leap of faith". Otherwise you'll never do it.... (read in full...)
Meeting online companion, AND his whole family?!
Q. I badly need advise before I materialize my plans. I met this guy exactly 5 months ago online as a way of coping up with a break-up. Anyway, he is younger than me by 7 years and at first we were just chatting out of boredom, I didn't even care...
A. 8 May 2010: Sounds like this guy is 18 at most. I'm not sure if you could really make it, but it has happened. I know of a famous song about a couple who made it precisely this way.
Sorry to bounce the question back to you, but I believe you should be think... (read in full...)
Attracted to a 40 year old man..do you think he feels the same?
Q. Okay there is this guy who is in his 40's that I really like. He is not married and never has been. I am attracted to him but I don't know if he likes me back. He came to my church one time and he kept staring at me and it looked like he was staring ...
A. 7 May 2010: The anonymous poster asked this question:
Why would a man in his 40s stare at an 18 year old's chest?
For the very same reason that any other man of any age would look at a woman's chest. There are two very attractive things on women's chest... (read in full...)
He told me that he does not want me with anyone else!?!
Q. so my ex and i broke up like a month ago we still talk now and then (well he initiates it)he comes over and talk (no sex)and i told him that i think that we should move on that i cannot keep doing that, he told me that he does not want me with ...
A. 7 May 2010: Well then, I'll have to say that he loves you and that's why he's doing what he's doing. If you don't love him, don't let him be doing what he's doing.... (read in full...)
What does it mean when a man (your ex) stares at you?
Q. I was at a party last week, and some friends and I decided to go to the bar. When I was there I went with a friend to get a drink and I sat in a chair waiting for on my friend to get his drink, when I saw my old flame, he started staring at me, and ...
A. 7 May 2010: And it's even better not to do anything rather than being taken back, used, and dumped.... (read in full...)
I don't want to get my hopes up. Should I accept my ex's invite?
Q. So I posted a question about a month ago looking for help. My girlfriend had broken up with me because she wanted to be single but still wants to be with me eventually. So I've taken a hands off approach. She still texts me and calls me but we only ...
A. 7 May 2010: Don't get you hopes up and make a clean break away from her.
You're not in a relationship with her, but you're not free to find someone else. She is not in a relationship with you, and, who knows, one day you might find out that a signific... (read in full...)
Should I rekindle this relationship?
Q. I broke up with this person who was married and I still care about this person. It has been 2 years now and want to know if I should pursue to rekindle a relationship with this person or leave them alone. This person said they still care and love ...
A. 7 May 2010: a) You're obviously unhappy with your current partner. Is it worth keeping that relationship? Apparently, NO, since you're thinking of rekindling the other guy.
b) The other guy was married and apparently is still married. I don't think yo... (read in full...)
The ball is in whose court?
Q. Well i know exes are meant to be forgotten in the past. I thought I was over mine. We haven't spoken for some 4 months due to my insistence that I don't want to talk to him anymore or him to call me. But the other night I was just alone and too ...
A. 7 May 2010: I am in complete and sincere agreement with the statements made by Ask Older Sister.... (read in full...)
What does it mean when a man (your ex) stares at you?
Q. I was at a party last week, and some friends and I decided to go to the bar. When I was there I went with a friend to get a drink and I sat in a chair waiting for on my friend to get his drink, when I saw my old flame, he started staring at me, and ...
A. 7 May 2010: I think I could only speculate why he did that. However, if things are over, they are over.
Question: What are your feelings about his staring at you?... (read in full...)
How do I tell her I'd like some pleasure sometimes too?
Q. Ok, so I've been going out with my girlfriend for just over a month now and we're at second base. Neither of us are that experienced sexually, and so we're just taking things slowly. I'll be blunt with my language and say that I've fingered h...
A. 7 May 2010: She already knows you would want some pleasure, too, only is not willing to go that far yet. Telling her that you would really appreciate the thing could help.... (read in full...)
I'm too young to be losing my sex drive.
Q. Ok so i have always had an amazing sex life with my husband. However 4 years ago we lost a baby and since then although we did try again sex hasn't been the same. We still like to experiment and have playful times but i would say especially in the ...
A. 7 May 2010: It seems like you haven't really got over the loss of your baby. I think you should deal with that. If that is the problem, that is. It could also be that there's other issues in the relationship and you're blaming it on the loss of the baby.... (read in full...)
He told me that he does not want me with anyone else!?!
Q. so my ex and i broke up like a month ago we still talk now and then (well he initiates it)he comes over and talk (no sex)and i told him that i think that we should move on that i cannot keep doing that, he told me that he does not want me with ...
A. 7 May 2010: Odd behavior. I could almost say it's inappropriate of him to want to keep you on a leash after HE dumped you.
All right, I'll say it: it's inappropriate of him to want to keep you on a leash after HE dumped you.... (read in full...)
Attracted to a 40 year old man..do you think he feels the same?
Q. Okay there is this guy who is in his 40's that I really like. He is not married and never has been. I am attracted to him but I don't know if he likes me back. He came to my church one time and he kept staring at me and it looked like he was staring ...
A. 7 May 2010: I am sure he was indeed looking at your chest. We men do that.
Apparently he likes you too, but he doesn't like you enough to convert to your religion. I don't think it would be wise to insist on his outwardly adopting a set of beliefs that he ... (read in full...)
boyfriend won't marry me coz of religion and family
Q. Hi I've been qiv my bf for 5 years and we hav a son together. And his family don't know yet. My son is 2 1/2 years old . And I really love my bf. But wen the question goes on to marriage. He says he can't marry me coz of family and religion. We are ...
A. 7 May 2010: It is very clear that the guy is a bastard. I wonder whether his religion doesn't frown on his having a child without marrying first. It's highly likely it does frown on that. In that case, he's a hypocrite to play the "religious" card on you for ... (read in full...)
Making out makes me have blue balls
Q. Hey guys I'm a 16 and a virgin, I have a girlfriend and everytime we makeout my balls hurt like a bitch. I have herd something about something called blue balls but they don't turn blue. Can anyone help me how to I stop them from hurting after I ...
A. 7 May 2010: Masturbation?... (read in full...)
I'm having very strong urges to have an affair..would like to hear from others who have been there..done that
Q. I am a 44 year old male. Married for 15 years. I'll get right to the point: my marriage is having big problems right now and I am at a crossroads. I have never cheated before. But I have never felt the way I do now. I am visiting depths of emotio...
A. 7 May 2010: I can't help you with the advice you want. I will spare you the morals. But even so, I can tell you that it sort of doesn't make much sense to want to bring a lot of problems on yourself. You don't say whether you have children, and most likely ... (read in full...)
Clothes make the woman!
Q. Hey everyone, I heard this one guy say something when i was walking down the street. he said ¨clothes make the woman.¨ What does that term mean?...
A. 30 April 2010: It means that man cannot undress a woman in his mind.... (read in full...)
I swear she has had anal sex before.
Q. This is gonna sound like I'm some jealous macho American asshole, so sorry in advance. I am wondering there is any way to think if my girl has had anal sex before. I realize that I should trust her when she says no, and that love is built on trus...
A. 30 April 2010: Er, so she consented to anal sex with you, and now you're complaining about it?... (read in full...)
How can one be so cruel?
Q. I have been going over and over this situation if you can call it that in my head for 3 days now and my head is hurting as much as my heart/feelings. I was dating a 40yr old guy with 2 grown up sons for a month. He made a big point of waiting...
A. 30 April 2010: I agree with the male anonymous. Get over it and live a happy life.... (read in full...)
How do I tell a guy I won't have sex?
Q. How do I tell a guy that I want to wait to have sex till I am married? That I am not willing to give it up?...
A. 29 April 2010: Tell him this:
"I want to wait to have sex till I am married. I am not willing to give it up".
You know how to tell him this. It seems to me you're afraid of what consequences it might bring. But then, you can't win them all. Either you... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is obsessed with me!
Q. My girlfriend is obsessed with me! We're both 18 and both in out first proper relationship. We've been going out for nearly 3 months now and she's turned into such a bunny boiler it's actually scaring me. Seriously, we're apart for 5 minutes and she ...
A. 29 April 2010: Oh, make sure CLINGY doesn't become DOMINEERING.... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is obsessed with me!
Q. My girlfriend is obsessed with me! We're both 18 and both in out first proper relationship. We've been going out for nearly 3 months now and she's turned into such a bunny boiler it's actually scaring me. Seriously, we're apart for 5 minutes and she ...
A. 29 April 2010: I agree with Isa123. CLINGY.... (read in full...)
The spark is gone in our relationship, is this letter appropriate to send?
Q. Dear all, Okay, where to start, been in relationship for 2 years, at first was the best, everything great and now she says spark has gone etc but whats to be with me, I still have that spark for her but really confused...anyway, I have written h...
A. 29 April 2010: Send the letter and get it over with.
Why can't you tell her this things face to face? Maybe because deep down you already know the answer?... (read in full...)
I want to wait until marriage for sex, how can I resist temptation?
Q. I'm 22, and I finally have a boyfriend, and just lost my first kiss about a year ago. I have always said I'd wait till marriage before sex, but I keep getting tempted. I moved in with him because I had no where else to go. Which is really not help...
A. 29 April 2010: I'm in agreement with good ol' Oscar Wilde about being able "to resist everything except temptation". But, if you really want to resist temptation, the simple piece of advice is:
RESIST TEMPTATION. Make it clear to yourself that you don't wa... (read in full...)
Should I have my friend tell him I like him?
Q. Ok so I like this guy alot! One of my best friends is friends with him so do I tell my friend I like him or not?...
A. 29 April 2010: NO, NEVER, NIX. Your sentimental life is your business. Make sure you call the shots.... (read in full...)
How can one be so cruel?
Q. I have been going over and over this situation if you can call it that in my head for 3 days now and my head is hurting as much as my heart/feelings. I was dating a 40yr old guy with 2 grown up sons for a month. He made a big point of waiting...
A. 29 April 2010: The simple point here being "LEAVE THE BASTARD".... (read in full...)
How do I let him know he can go for it?
Q. Ok, well, I'm 19 and I have been dating my boyfriend for about 3 weeks now. We have been friends for a couple years now and are both virgins. Everytime I see him I can't help but smile and I find him to be a complete turn on pretty much all the ...
A. 29 April 2010: Well, sorry. Your post gave me the impression that you wanted to "go for it" as in "having sex".... (read in full...)
I have fallen really hard, but she is moving 600 miles away. Do I just let her go?
Q. I met a women at my best friends wedding,we immediately started going out and things were going extremely good. Until tonight,she is going for an interview for a job in a town 600 miles away. What am I to do,should I be calm about it and wish her ...
A. 29 April 2010: Sorry to be the killjoy again. Did she stay because of you, or because going away didn't really go well with her personal plans?
Man, YOU HAVE TO KNOW FOR SURE WHETHER SHE IS INTO YOU OR NOT. Don't just react to the circumstances.... (read in full...)
How do I let him know he can go for it?
Q. Ok, well, I'm 19 and I have been dating my boyfriend for about 3 weeks now. We have been friends for a couple years now and are both virgins. Everytime I see him I can't help but smile and I find him to be a complete turn on pretty much all the ...
A. 28 April 2010: Guys do like it when a girl expresses those things and gets the goosebumps and all that.
So you want to have sex but don't want to openly invite it. Well, when he's kissing you and all that, if he wants to go away, ask him to stay, and kiss him... (read in full...)
How can one be so cruel?
Q. I have been going over and over this situation if you can call it that in my head for 3 days now and my head is hurting as much as my heart/feelings. I was dating a 40yr old guy with 2 grown up sons for a month. He made a big point of waiting...
A. 28 April 2010: You are so, so right, poster. This should have never happened to you.
As to erectile dysfunction, it could be the case, but we can't be sure it is. He couldn't sustain an erection that time, and was refusing to have sex, but that doesn't ... (read in full...)
Our bet to see how could go without sex the longest!
Q. My boyfriend and I made a bet to see who can go without sex the longest. It is stupid but I just lost my virginity to him and he thinks I'm addicted and always want it. His conditions if he wins is he's using restraints more than once, gettings bjs ...
A. 24 April 2010: I agree with all chigirl said.
I also think the bet is silly because either of you can masturbate in private :-). How do you know for sure he isn't masturbating?... (read in full...)
Is this a new trend? Twenty-somethings hitting on 40-somethings?
Q. To all of the men out there. I am 48 years old and have been getting hit up on by gorgeous guys in thier early 20's. Is this a new trend going on? Are these guys just looking for sex? FYI i have not been going out with any of them because of the ...
A. 24 April 2010: Well, women your age can look gorgeous. You haven't given us that piece of information.
Most likely they want sex. yes.
And you can do as you please :-).... (read in full...)
Will I look back and regret sleeping with a 46 year old man?
Q. Hi, thanks for your time, I'm 17 and the guy I'm having casual sex with is man who is 46, with the benifit of hindsight will I look back and think what he is doing is wrong? It's just a pattern I've noticed throught life, as I get older I look bac...
A. 24 April 2010: Men his age love sleeping with young flesh. That's how we feel.
Should you do it? It's your business, but I think you shouldn't.... (read in full...)
How do you confess your feelings without risking a friendship?
Q. How do you find the confidence to risk a wonderful friendship for something more? I'm in love with a good friend who is in a relationship. I can't work up the nerve to tell her how I feel. Every time I think about doing it, my heart races and ...
A. 24 April 2010: What I mean is, spill the beans, man! Maybe she knows already. This way, you will know whether it's meant to be or not.... (read in full...)
How do you confess your feelings without risking a friendship?
Q. How do you find the confidence to risk a wonderful friendship for something more? I'm in love with a good friend who is in a relationship. I can't work up the nerve to tell her how I feel. Every time I think about doing it, my heart races and ...
A. 24 April 2010: I'm with marieclaire. There's no way to talk about your feelings without putting the friendship at risk. I am afraid that, women being women, she might already know what your feelings are anyways. Women are very apt at reading us.... (read in full...)
I have fallen really hard, but she is moving 600 miles away. Do I just let her go?
Q. I met a women at my best friends wedding,we immediately started going out and things were going extremely good. Until tonight,she is going for an interview for a job in a town 600 miles away. What am I to do,should I be calm about it and wish her ...
A. 15 April 2010: Again, the physical distance is not what matters.
Maybe it's futile now, but I guess you're sort of avoiding the difficult issue. Did she leave because she didn't care that much about you, or because she had just met you? You need to determin... (read in full...)
I have fallen really hard, but she is moving 600 miles away. Do I just let her go?
Q. I met a women at my best friends wedding,we immediately started going out and things were going extremely good. Until tonight,she is going for an interview for a job in a town 600 miles away. What am I to do,should I be calm about it and wish her ...
A. 13 April 2010: Physical distance doesn't matter that much if two people really love each other. If you love the girl, and your only hope of seeing her is sailing all the way to China on a can of tuna, you do it, and the perils and hazards become just simple and ... (read in full...)
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