My wife of 30 years just confessed that she was not a virgin
Q. my wife of 30 years confessed that she was not a virgin when we were married. I was not a virgin when we met and if she had told me before we were married I would have been fine with it. My problem is she made such a big deal of telling me she was ...
A. 5 September 2017: I would find this hard to forgive as well, off course it is going to upset you, it doesn't matter that it was 30 years ago she still lied to you and that is a hard thing to get over. Am not sure what her reasons where, and am even more confused now ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't hug me as often as I'd like
Q. I've been living with my bf for 4 months now, only got 2 hugs from him cause I had to sneak them but he said I'm too needy. He says he loves me but I'm too embarrassed to ask to cuddle with him. sometimes a girl needs to be held to feel better. ...
A. 5 September 2017: Generally in a new relationship their is a lot off hugging, it doesn't sound like you are needy at all it just sounds like he is not emotionally connected in the relationship. I couldn't remain in a relationship like this. Me and my husband hug ... (read in full...)
I'm made to feel like a social pariah because I've chosen not to have children
Q. Dear all, I am a 37 year old woman with a great job and an even greater husband. I have my own house, I travel a lot and I love my life. I live and work in a ver small and narrow-minded community which makes me feel like a pariah because I don't ...
A. 5 September 2017: Next person that says something to you stop and just be blunt with them and ask them how it would make you feel to keep getting bombarded, that maybe you are not able to have children, has anyone thought off that? So many ignorant people in the ... (read in full...)
Is this woman's behaviour a red flag?
Q. Well been seeing this woman for about seven months,been staying at her house the whole time, I do own my own house, my daughter and granddaughter live there, my house, I don't know what to do we get along good most of the time, but she snaps at...
A. 5 September 2017: I would not allow her to smoke in your car when you have the child. If she went to light up a cigarette then I would stop the car and ask her to get out and I am not joking. Is it her car? If so then stop taking your innocent grand daughter in it. ... (read in full...)
My married male co-worker alternates between friendly and cold
Q. I want to ask for help and I hope I can write this to get advice and not judgement as in my heart I don't plan to sin. I work as a nurse and I just started at a new hospital. On my team is another male nurse that work with that is married. Since I ...
A. 5 September 2017: Sounds to me like maybe his mood changes drastically, maybe its his personality or maybe he gets stressed some days. Nothing from this post suggests that he has feelings for you or that you have done something wrong, it could be just who he is. ... (read in full...)
Should I expect a solid promise or allow things to work out on their own?
Q. Hi guys! I am back again with another question. Some back info: I was with my now ex for 6 years. I just turned 25 and he will be 25 in a few months. After being in the same city for about 3 years, then a few long distance moments (lasting...
A. 5 September 2017: He is keeping his options open and I don't think he wants to think about what is going to happen next year or where he is going to go. Yes he may like to be back together with you, but if you are happy in your city and he wants to go somewhere else ... (read in full...)
At what point am I allowed to ask to be friends with an ex?
Q. I broke up with a long distance boyfriend I had for 1 1/2 years about one month ago. The distance wasn't going to change and I was going through a difficult emotional time where I needed him to if not physically be there for me, emotionally be there ...
A. 5 September 2017: Are you able to handle just being friends with him? Won't old feelings come back? I mean it has only been a month so am guessing there is still feelings attached to him. I don't think you should contact him as you broke up with him. I don't think ... (read in full...)
How do I move on and trust him? Or is he not trust worthy?
Q. I have a big trust issue regarding my boyfriend and his ex. When my boyfriend and I first dated, he broke up with his ex to be with me, but he never told her about me because she has a really bad temper and she was still trying to get back with him. ...
A. 5 September 2017: I honestly don't know how you can put yourself through this for years, surely you must be deeply unhappy being with someone that you cannot trust? I honestly don't see how you can ever trust him enough. A relationship does not work without trust, ... (read in full...)
How can my boyfriend have all these text messages to other women? I feel like I'm on another planet
Q. Im just so upset and not sure what to do. My partner and I have been together now for 6 years, it has been a struggle as after the first 8 months of us being together he slept with someone else. I managed to forgive him for this and after time and ...
A. 5 September 2017: Then talk to your friends and family and tell them what has happened. They are their for you to talk to, so let them support you. You don't need to do this by yourself. ... (read in full...)
I am in love with a girl who has a boyfriend.
Q. To cut to the chase, i love a girl who is already on a relationship. She's a really close friend. I'm never bored when I'm with her. We have almost the same likes and dislikes. Stuff like movies, books, and game preferences are almost identical. ...
A. 5 September 2017: You need to be honest with her, she knows you have feelings so tell her how difficult it is for you to spend time with her at the moment and you need some space because it is difficult to get over your feelings when she is their.... (read in full...)
How can my boyfriend have all these text messages to other women? I feel like I'm on another planet
Q. Im just so upset and not sure what to do. My partner and I have been together now for 6 years, it has been a struggle as after the first 8 months of us being together he slept with someone else. I managed to forgive him for this and after time and ...
A. 31 August 2017: He is cruel and he does not love you. If he loved you he would be sorry he would be doing everything he could to prove to you he was wrong and to try and win back your trust. But no instead he is turning it around on you and trying to control the ... (read in full...)
If I was doing something really annoying or inappropriate, would she have made it more obvious?
Q. I apologise if I have posted this one already as I tried a couple of forums to get a little advice as I'm a bit shy to ask my friends. So me and a female friend have started having sex. We talked about it long and hard before trying it for the firs...
A. 31 August 2017: I think you are worrying over nothing here, it does sound like she was simply just saying it has never been done before. If you are worried be more vocal and ask her what she does like and if their is anything that she doesn't like. If you are ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to ask for a date from him of when he will abandon the search for the dream and work to support our everyday?
Q. Am I being too negative to consider a possible and positive future? Or is my gut's screaming correct? My boyfriend and I were recently laid off from our job, we're still working but our last day is approaching and then we will receive our ...
A. 31 August 2017: Are you the same poster that posted about your boyfriend being mad at you for taking a settlement? Am guessing as both posts are extremely similar that you are.
All I can say to you fairly is if your boyfriend cannot afford his way and he is refu... (read in full...)
Was this a missed financial opportunity and should I have consulted with my boyfriend?
Q. I'd like opinions from everyone about communication and responsibility within a relationship. To briefly summarize, my boyfriend and I live in my childhood home. We get by w/ our jobs and friends/tenants helping out on the monthly expenses. B/c my ...
A. 31 August 2017: If you feel fine with it then that is all that matters. Personally I would have discussed it with my partner, obviously you should have the final say as it effects you but as a couple these things I think really should be discussed.
... (read in full...)
Can anyone explain why I have this dream?
Q. I am a mid 20s female and I'm trying to find out the meaning to a dream I have had twice. In my dreams I'm myself and I'm making out with a female (not the same person both times) I know but aren't close with in my wake life. Then the making out ...
A. 31 August 2017: It could be just that you are expressing yourself sexually through your dreams. If the relationship has not been at its happiest until recently then it could be just your mind wandering on to something else to pleasure you and bring you happiness. ... (read in full...)
Why does my married lover not admit how he feels about me? And keeps changing his words?
Q. Can anyone here help me to make sense of my married lover's words? Why did he tell me he loves me? Then the next time he says he likes me. Then he says he likes me a lot. Then the next time he says he adores me. And the next time after that, it's...
A. 31 August 2017: Why does he stay with you? Because you would blow his cover and ruin his marriage if he left you. Honestly this man does not love you, and he cannot cheat on you, because you are not his wife, she is the woman at home that he sleeps beside at night, ... (read in full...)
Why would a man still hang onto his girlfriend even if he is cheating with other women?
Q. If a guy is cheating on his girlfriend, why would he not leave her? He obviously is not the right man for her. So, why not just leave her, let her find a better man for her, instead of hang onto her knowing he is hurting her? Clearly a rel...
A. 31 August 2017: I don't know the answer to your question, but I have witnessed lots off men cheat on their girlfriends throughout their relationship and then propose and get married and have a family but some will stop and some won't. Some guys like the thrill off ... (read in full...)
I can't get over a guy I dated for a month?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles. I still have feelings for an ex that I was only with for one month and it's really troubling me. He wasn't my first boyfriend, and it wasn't my longest relationship, but I've never felt this way before. We had a lovely ...
A. 31 August 2017: You don't get over someone by dating someone else, that is cruel and unkind to the other person. To get over him you need to distance yourself from him, cut the contact outside off school and hang out with other friends. Don't date someone unless ... (read in full...)
Is he going to call?
Q. I was working a temp job for the summer. I happened to meet one of the owners of the company one day, and we talked for a while. I noticed an instant attraction between us. He was not my direct boss, so I only saw him maybe once a week going in ...
A. 31 August 2017: Just because he looks you up and down does not mean he doesn't do that to every other young girl in the business and it sure doesn't mean that he is going to ring you for a booty call. You are being very presumptuous. He might store your number in ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is asking for more than I can afford.
Q. Dear Aunts, I have been visiting my boyfriend for a week now so today im leaving ive decided to take him out for lunch. He just told me that it would be better if i buy him grocery. Im a student I don't have that kind of money. All i wanted was to ...
A. 29 August 2017: Maybe he feels he is always the one cooking for you and he want's you to chip in on the grocery shopping. It sounds like he wants to be with someone who can pay their own way, if you depend on your parents then just be honest with him and tell him ... (read in full...)
Why won't he Marry me?
Q. Hi, I have been with my partner 6 years next month. I never wanted to get married, was never something that was important to me. Until I was in love. We have been together 6 years and have agreed to start trying for a baby next year after my friends ...
A. 29 August 2017: For whatever reasons he is not ready and you talk about what you want but have you gave him the chance to talk about what he wants? I understand you want to settle down and having children, but what about him? Maybe he is not ready, maybe he cannot ... (read in full...)
A co-worker made an unkind remark that really hurt me. How do I cope?
Q. I'm feeling very hurt today. At my previous job (as well as life in general) you could say that I'M not the most organized person (not filthy, but more of an issue of putting things back where they belong, avoiding clutter and procrastination,etc. ...
A. 29 August 2017: You need to work on yourself esteem, how do you cope?? Well you just be yourself and not let others bring you down. If you are unorganized so what, as long as you are doing your job to the best off your ability then continue to do so, don't try and ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to snitch to his girlfriend?
Q. On Friday night I met up with my ex BF from last year. He has a new GF but we met up and hooked up. I know it was wrong but he persued me. Now he has asked me to keep quiet about it and gone back to his life as though nothing has happened. He sped ...
A. 29 August 2017: Seems you only want to tell her to break them up, he was not the only one in the wrong here, you hooked up with him knowing he had a girlfriend so that just makes the two off you as bad as each other, just learn in future not to involve yourself in ... (read in full...)
Why 2 days later does my husband go off on me about something I said while drunk?
Q. I got too drunk on Saturday night - it happens only occasionally. I said something embarassing about my husband to his friend (who was also too drunk to remember). My husband brought it up - but told me it is ok - his friend probably didn't hear and ...
A. 29 August 2017: Are you serious about giving up alcohol or is it just something you are saying until this blows over? I have a lot of experience in your area. He had a delayed reaction, meaning the more he thought about the more angrier he got. I would imagine your ... (read in full...)
How can my boyfriend have all these text messages to other women? I feel like I'm on another planet
Q. Im just so upset and not sure what to do. My partner and I have been together now for 6 years, it has been a struggle as after the first 8 months of us being together he slept with someone else. I managed to forgive him for this and after time and ...
A. 29 August 2017: Honestly he is feeding you a story so that he can get away with emotionally cheating on you. Honestly what do you get out off this relationship? Can you honestly say you are able to trust him? To me he cannot be trusted if he wanted to be with you ... (read in full...)
Is my wife sleeping elsewhere?
Q. I am a married man who was in a monogamous relationship with my wife for seven years. I was a virgin before marriage. My wife was the first and only sexual partner. I went to a massage parlour in an inebriated condition while on a business trip to a ...
A. 29 August 2017: I wouldn't have sex with you either if you cheated on me. You are lucky she is still with you. If my husband done that he would be out the door!! ... (read in full...)
Married 11 years and my husband is now wanting details of my sexual life before him.
Q. Hello i'm a 37 yo woman and me and my husbant are together now for 11 years. Everything started when i met him 18 years ago and i fell in love with his misterious eyes. We became friends and eventually a few years later i got my nerves together and ...
A. 29 August 2017: Your past is none off his business. He is going to just hurt himself listening to you talking about other men. You need to be strong here and tell him you are not talking about this with him, tell him its the past and reassure him he is the only man ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says my friends took advantage of me.
Q. Hello Everyone! Just wanted some insight on this situation. Last night, my boyfriend and I had friends over (my friend and his girlfriend) to watch the Game of Thrones season finale. I cooked a lot more than my boyfriend thought I should have but ...
A. 29 August 2017: I am like you as well and I go to lots off effort when we have guests over, only we have the opposite problem they never know when to leave haha. Honestly I don't see why it seems ungrateful just because they left after the show, did they thank you ... (read in full...)
I need space after an argument, but will it make things worse?
Q. Is it okay to turn off your phone after having an argument with your boyfriend? I feel like I need some space but at the same time I'm worried it will make the argument worse. ...
A. 29 August 2017: Turning off your phone would be a childish thing to do. We all need space so the best thing to do is to be honest and tell your boyfriend that you need space for a while and that you will be in contact with him when you are ready.... (read in full...)
Tempted not to take part in an activity because HE will be there!
Q. My love interest and I have known each for years through a walking group but we have never dated due to a communication breakdown. Recently we have started to become closed again. It could possible go somewhere but he is a cautious as the last few ...
A. 29 August 2017: It sounds to me from this post and your other ones that you like him but the feelings are not being returned. If you want to go then go with your friends and let him enjoy the experience with his friends. It shouldn't stop you from going unless ... (read in full...)
Anal sex embarrassment!
Q. I had anal sex last night and thought I was clean, when he went really deep I had a big accident and it literally went everywhere was so embarrassing my boyfriend was really good about it we had a shower and he has just shrugged it off but I am so ...
A. 29 August 2017: I would imagine it is normal enough, as the others say no food for the day and try an enema, personally I don't like it so don't have this issue, but if it is something you enjoy and want to do again that is some ways to prepare. Sounds like you ... (read in full...)
I am in love with a girl who has a boyfriend.
Q. To cut to the chase, i love a girl who is already on a relationship. She's a really close friend. I'm never bored when I'm with her. We have almost the same likes and dislikes. Stuff like movies, books, and game preferences are almost identical. ...
A. 29 August 2017: Look you made a mistake while drunk, so first off allow that to be a lesson not to drink so much as it is scary, I have experienced it myself and it is a horrible feeling not being able to remember what you done.
Now as for this girl. You have apol... (read in full...)
Hard to read this workmate
Q. I am 38 and she would be around 27.Her office is next to mine but i dont know her name.A month back i repeatedly noticed her looking at me.I became curious(i had put on weight and didnt think a pretty girl would look at me) and we started ...
A. 29 August 2017: Would you be happy if your wife went for a coffee and with a chat if she felt some man liked her?... (read in full...)
When my boyfriend makes sarcastic comments how should I react?
Q. When my boyfriend makes sarcastic comments how should I react? Recently I asked if I looked fat in some new jeans and he replied "No fatter than usual!!" and then laughed and hugged me. I know its a classic "Does my bum look big on this"? question ...
A. 29 August 2017: If my husband said that to me I would just laugh but that is probably because I get his sarcastic moods but I also see the good side to him and the loving caring side to him. I guess only you know your relationship and you know deep down if he is ... (read in full...)
How do I fix this verbally abusive relationship?
Q. Hi, I'm really am confused by my relationship. I am 27 and my boyfriends 29. I've been with my boyfriend for over 4 years. It's not been an easy four years tbh. When we met I just finished university. He was living with his parents, getting...
A. 29 August 2017: You deserve better than the way this man is treating you. Nobody should be treated like that in a relationship. You now need to be brave and end things before it goes to far. If you stay with him and put up with him then your confidence will go ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him of my feelings?
Q. I have had feelings for a guy for many years which we did lose touch for a while. Recently we have got back in touch and been on nights out and walks with our friends. I know he has dropped hints about us and the way he looks at me I can tell he has ...
A. 29 August 2017: Yes off course tell him, it will probably be the best thing you ever do!... (read in full...)
Have I wasted my life just waiting?
Q. Hi all. I'm 26 female, educated but unemployed. I'm in search of job since last 3 years but I haven't been successful in it yet. I live in small city and I have lots of issues with my mom who is single parent. All my friends in my city moved away ...
A. 29 August 2017: You cannot change your past but you can make your future how ever you want it to be. Go look for a job and a flat and be more independent. Go out more and meet people your own age. Try and make new friends and meet new potential dates. Sitting ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend stays friends with his ex because she has no friends and he feels sorry for her
Q. Hello, I have been dating my boyfriend for 9 months now. We are ok – meaning, we talked about moving in together after my lease expire; Him buying me an engagement ring; He helps me pay my rent every month; I have access to his phone and I have...
A. 29 August 2017: His excuse is not a great one, he still has feelings for her so he is keeping her their as a friend and also in case it doesn't work out between you both. Look this man has left YOU for this WOMAN twice now and he continues to talk to her, it sounds ... (read in full...)
I started bleeding after sex
Q. Hi this is a question for the women. I've been in a relationship for 4 years and last night about 2/3 hours after sex I started bleeding. I had just finished my period 2 days before. anyone else experienced anything like this and is it anything t...
A. 29 August 2017: Could be lots of things, are you do a cervical smear test? If so then I would suggest booking one just to make sure everything is okay. It probably is and it could have just been blood from your period or maybe your partner was a bit to rough. Get ... (read in full...)
He lied to my face, only admitted it after I told him I had seen proof
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for two years. We broke up for about a month or so in between, in which he admitted to kissing a girl. That's it he says.I don't care about any of that, we were broken up. However, I found a condom in his backpack. We ...
A. 25 July 2017: I have heard off men going down on one knee and proposing, having a child together, buying a house together and still out cheating! Yes it does happen and you should be extremely careful.... (read in full...)
Has my boyfriend gone too far? He says its just porn but I've found him on swinger sites, looking up ex's
Q. Has my boyfriend of 8 years gone too far? I have recently found my bf has been watching porn. He knows I don't like this but I could have got over that. But I have also found he has been on swinger sites, sites with a list of girls to date, his find...
A. 25 July 2017: No you shouldn't just get over it, he is messing with your head that is all he is doing, how has it progressed since you wrote this post? Did use manage to sort it out?... (read in full...)
He lied to my face, only admitted it after I told him I had seen proof
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for two years. We broke up for about a month or so in between, in which he admitted to kissing a girl. That's it he says.I don't care about any of that, we were broken up. However, I found a condom in his backpack. We ...
A. 6 July 2017: Stop making excuses for his lying. He lied to your face that is fact, and for me that is someone I would not be able to trust, also its cool to have a condom? What age is he 12?... (read in full...)
Has my boyfriend gone too far? He says its just porn but I've found him on swinger sites, looking up ex's
Q. Has my boyfriend of 8 years gone too far? I have recently found my bf has been watching porn. He knows I don't like this but I could have got over that. But I have also found he has been on swinger sites, sites with a list of girls to date, his find...
A. 23 June 2017: Yeah it sounds like he is wanting to revisit the past experiences you had even though he knows you don't want to. I guess when you both experimented it opened a can off worms for him and now that is all that he can see. Personally for me it would be ... (read in full...)
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