A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Is it okay to turn off your phone after having an argument with your boyfriend? I feel like I need some space but at the same time I'm worried it will make the argument worse. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (29 August 2017):
 Turning off your phone would be a childish thing to do. We all need space so the best thing to do is to be honest and tell your boyfriend that you need space for a while and that you will be in contact with him when you are ready.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2017): You have to learn to effectively communicate. That means to workout problems by talking, listening; then making a compromise that will salvage the relationship. That is, if you intend to keep your boyfriend. Just keep in-mind, he could make that decision himself, without your approval.
It is rude to shut-off the phone. If you want space, ask for it. Tell him specifically that you need time to cool-off, think, and sort things out. Inform him not to attempt to contact you during this time. Do not leave him waiting for days on-end. If you're that upset, end it.
Don't leave him hanging, if you know right-now that you want to breakup. Don't make running away your way of dealing with relationship problems; or any problem. Don't make the silent-treatment a way to punish people.
Start learning to be an adult and handling your relationships like a woman. Now is the time.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (28 August 2017):
 I agree with Auntie Cindy,
Turning the phone off is not OK. (unless he REFUSES to give you a little time & space to cool down and keeps texting calling constantly... then I can perhaps understand it).
TELL him that you NEED some time to think about the argument and that you NEED a few hours/days to sort through what was said and how you feel about it.
turning your phone off WILL make things worse in the sense that it's immature and not helping. It's like sticking your fingers in your ears going nana-nana I can't hear you!
If he doesn't respect that you NEED some time to process it, I'd just put HIS number on mute (if you can) or just NOT answer. (If you have already explained that you need this time off.)
Think about it. HOW would you feel if he just turned his phone off instead of TALKING to you?
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (28 August 2017):
 You don't need to turn your phone off, which is actually quite passive aggressive. You could communicate like reasonable adults ( at least, it's worth a try ! :) and if he calls, you could answer and tell him : " Look, I need some space right now. I am emotional about the argument we had, and, while I guess there are things we should talk about, I'd like to do it in a few days when I'll have calmed down , and feel less confused ( or upset, or whatever it is that you are feeling ) ".
...............................
|
