Is my boyfriend bisexual if he's had multiple homosexual relations in the past but claims he doesn't like men?
Q. I'm a woman. My 33 year old boyfriend of 6 months recently admitted to me that when he was a preteen, him and 2 if his best friends would masturbate together, rub on each other and give each other oral. This happened for over a year. He also just ...
A. 2 January 2013: Wow. I was absolutely right about this. He *did* groom you to be okay with his male affairs. You've gotta run away fast from him! He got head from his friend and doesn't consider it cheating? What if his friend had been a woman?? He is ... (read in full...)
If say to wait before we do it, will he leave?
Q. Im talking to this one boy at my school and we've liked each other for awhile now. He tells me im beautiful and that he want to be with me. He calls me babe and bae. He told me he wanted to kiss me but i said im not ready for that. that i need some ...
A. 17 December 2012: In principle, I fully agree with being allowed to set boundaries and a good guy being able to respect them, and that's true. If a guy was looking for sex or groping or for you to perform oral on him or whatever, I'd say that if he were to leave ... (read in full...)
Thoughts regarding retrograde jealousy....is a person's past really not any of the current relationship's business?
Q. An observation from a straight guy: I CALL BULLSHIT on people who claim that lovers are not accountable for how their sexual past is non of their current relationship's business. What if you only ever had one girlfriend, and before she met y...
A. 15 December 2012: There is something missing in this discussion here, and I'm hoping that you, Opus97, can give us a complete and thorough definition of the words "held accountable" the way you use them here.
What does it mean for a sexually experienced woman to... (read in full...)
Thoughts regarding retrograde jealousy....is a person's past really not any of the current relationship's business?
Q. An observation from a straight guy: I CALL BULLSHIT on people who claim that lovers are not accountable for how their sexual past is non of their current relationship's business. What if you only ever had one girlfriend, and before she met y...
A. 14 December 2012: I'll keep discussing hypothetically here. You chose a sexually experienced partner to fall in love with. You made a compatibility call long before the issue of anal sex came up. If you had wanted to be with a girl who wasn't experienced, then you ... (read in full...)
After twenty odd years, I still love this lady with all my heart and yet she won't leave her husband for me
Q. Twenty some years ago I met this lady and we dated for four months and due to circumstance beyond our control I had to leave her because of my job. During these four months our relationship became very intense and we fell in love with each other. ...
A. 14 December 2012: One thing I'm sure of, and that it's futile to tell you to move on. After 20 years, some habits just never get lost, and that includes you burning a candle for her for 20+ years.
But one thing I want to ask you is -- are you sure that it's lov... (read in full...)
Anxious about first time sex with my B/f. Any advice?
Q. Me and my bf are talking about having sex, we discussed it and I want to be the 'passive' one of the two, if you get me, but I have seen him naked and I am worried because he is really big! I haven't had sex before and he said it hurts the first ...
A. 12 December 2012: Oops! I am a dork! You're right Cindy, thanks for the catch!... (read in full...)
How can I get my girlfriend to be more accepting of my cannabis use? She's gone from being a nice loving woman to a total nag!
Q. I am 28 and have been with my girlfriend for 4 years. I recently made new friends and they have introduced me to smoking cannabis again. This is something I have not done since I was about 18. My girlfriend hates it though and has gone from a nice ...
A. 10 December 2012: Very well said, Cindy. Fantastic advice!... (read in full...)
Worried because my hookup count is building up...
Q. Hello all, It's been more than half a year since I got out of my first and only relationship that lasted a good 1.5 years. And since the end of that relationship, I've had a good handful of drunken hookups. I've had three one night stands alr...
A. 10 December 2012: You're not a slut. You're single and you have the right to explore sexually. However, I think that you are punishing yourself for the loss of your serious relationship. You're not enjoying these drunken one night stands, and are almost using them ... (read in full...)
Anxious about first time sex with my B/f. Any advice?
Q. Me and my bf are talking about having sex, we discussed it and I want to be the 'passive' one of the two, if you get me, but I have seen him naked and I am worried because he is really big! I haven't had sex before and he said it hurts the first ...
A. 10 December 2012: Neither of you should be "passive"! The best sex is between two adventurous, active, engaged, eager people! It's a mutual dance of tongues, hands, bodies, tension, fluids, breath, and pleasure!
But I get what you mean. :)
Don't be afra... (read in full...)
My boyfriend was never really there for me, he lied to me and gave me reasons to doubt him and now I think I'm in love with his friend
Q. Am 20 and my boyfriend is 26. We've been together for 1 year. He was my first sexually. sure we do have our issues but we make sure its resolved by the end of the day. just about 3 months in the relationship, he confessed that he does have a 4 year ...
A. 10 December 2012: WHAT??? That's rich. A guy who is cheating on his FIANCE and sleeping with you is asking you to "TRUST" him. He doesn't know the meaning of the word.
Break up with him. Do not ever date cheaters, because you're flushing your life down the toil... (read in full...)
Is this a trust issue for me? Or should I just accept and trust that he is just friends with her??
Q. I have been in a relationship with a guy who lives an hour away for almost 4 months now..and for the last month or so we have been getting in fights every week. sometimes a couple times a week. The main problem is that I have had trust issues...
A. 10 December 2012: No guy who is in a relationship should ever find a girl on Facebook, take her out to dinner, and meet her parents. Seriously? Just trust a guy? No way! That is inappropriate no matter what! Doesn't matter if they had sex or not. No man in a ... (read in full...)
What can I do about my hairy butt? Because I'm worried my Gf will be grossed out by it.
Q. My gf wants to do things to my butt. but i am really conscious because its hairy. What do i do , I dont want to stop her from doing it because it'll be embarassing, but it will be even more embarassing if she gets grossed out when she actually sees...
A. 10 December 2012: You're a guy! Guys have hairy butts, chests, faces, and other places! My husband loves when I run my nails slowly along his butt, and it's hairy! I love his butt too, in hot jeans and when they're off!
Don't worry about the wax! Get really g... (read in full...)
Am I responsible for my B/f sleeping around? Did I drive him to do it?
Q. I am 24 and my boyfriend is also 24. We have been together for four years on and off after meeting while working in the same bar. I was at uni at the time and after i became pregnant, i left my final year with the hope of going back to university ...
A. 10 December 2012: Your boyfriend is an immature cheater. You didn't drive him to it, and it isn't your fault. He got you pregnant and is sleeping around on you. That's on him and only him.
You have two kids (one son and one on the way). Concentrate on them. T... (read in full...)
Why did she lead me on when she was in a long term relationship??
Q. Not to sure why I am writing this, I think I know the answer, but maybe this will make me feel a bit better? A young Lady in my work environment seemed to try to get my attention by turning up at certain times, not going into much detail, e.g. whe...
A. 10 December 2012: First of all, she didn't lead you on. You two never dated. She immediately told you that she was in a relationship when you made a move on her, telling her you that you were interested in her. She did the right thing by you in not letting the ... (read in full...)
I thought it all went great....then why hasn't he called?
Q. I met a guy n have him my number. He called talked on the phone daily. We finally got up yesterday. For 6 hrs. He told me he was having a great time. He even came inside for a drink. We kissed he ttotally was liking our make out. He hasnt called n ...
A. 10 December 2012: This was only yesterday? Just leave it for now! You already called him once and he didn't return it. It may not be for a few days.
If he still doesn't call, then chalk it up to not quite a match. Shake it off, and move on. Sometimes it happe... (read in full...)
Why did my ex say all that he did?
Q. I bumped into my ex in a pub yesterday. He told me that he had seen me in another pub earlier that day, as he was walking past the pub at the time, but when he went in that pub later on, i had left. I was surprised that he noticed that i had left. ...
A. 10 December 2012: Sorry if you still like him, but WHAT AN IDIOT!
You forgot to give him change back? This is his "reunion" conversation to you? You "look stocky"? This is his way of sweet talking you? He mentions being interested in a married woman? What was... (read in full...)
My daughter's bizarre behavior has the whole family concerned. What should we do? Stage an intervention? Get her counselling?
Q. My 19-year-old daughter has recently started acting bizarrely and, to be honest, I don't know why. I highly doubt it's drugs, as we live in a fairly middleclass area and everyone knows everyone else. She's started binding her breasts down (I found...
A. 10 December 2012: Right now, this is neither cause for intervention or counselling. Intervention is for drug use or illegal activities. Counselling is for depression, anxiety, mental issues, or cutting/suicide.
Communication is the first step. What is your rel... (read in full...)
I can't seem to figure out exactly what I'm holding onto with my 'virginity.
Q. I am so confused as to how to view my virginity. I am 20 years old, female, live in London, UK. I would say I am pretty. Long black hair, light brown eyes, taller than average - 5'8, medium sized body. I have met guys in the past, but usuall...
A. 10 December 2012: "I have been very close to having sex, to be honest, I was seeing a guy and he just about put the tip in, but it hurt like mad and I had to tell him to stop, but then after that had happened, something was stopping me from doing it again."
Hold ... (read in full...)
How can I get my girlfriend to be more accepting of my cannabis use? She's gone from being a nice loving woman to a total nag!
Q. I am 28 and have been with my girlfriend for 4 years. I recently made new friends and they have introduced me to smoking cannabis again. This is something I have not done since I was about 18. My girlfriend hates it though and has gone from a nice ...
A. 10 December 2012: Let's get this straight -- you want her to accept you as a budding (hah!) illegal drug user and on-the-road-to-becoming-an-addict?
I wish she were here, because I'd tell her to stop nagging you and break up with you. The REASON she's nagging ... (read in full...)
What's an emotional affair? Am I having one?
Q. Hi! I'm a single guy. And I was told that I'm having an affair with a married woman. It's not what you think were NOT sleeping together. We dated when we were younger, we lost contact after high school and have reunited about a year ago. A female ...
A. 10 December 2012: Let me give you the "emotional affair" questionairre quiz:
1. Do you still have feelings for her?
2. Has she been confiding in you any of the troubles in her marriage?
3. Would you feel uncomfortable if her husband saw any of the things sh... (read in full...)
I just want to make sure I'm not being overly sweet or too clingy
Q. Hey guys I'm now dating a girl I've always had feelings for and i do believe i love her. We are both very happy and we connect so very well its uncanny. I want to make sure she will keep growing stronger feelings for me but am a little scared th...
A. 10 December 2012: You're doing great! You're feeling that whole "out of control" thing that love does to people with a slight side order of insecurity!
You're totally fine! Enjoy the relationship! Don't be anxious when time passes, and keep doing nice things f... (read in full...)
What is your position on living together before marriage?
Q. Hello dear Aunts :) and uncles :) What is your position on living together before marriage? Before engagement? What do you think the pros and cons are to each scenario? Some say that while living together, the man gains everything, while the ...
A. 10 December 2012: There are pros and cons either way. I wouldn't say the man gains everything because the convenience factor benefits both the man and the woman (since this is in the context of heterosexual relationships, I'll continue this context for the sake of ... (read in full...)
Scared I'll miss him if we break-up. But I feel neglected and second best. Any advice on how to manage this situation?
Q. I think I should leave my boyfriend of 3 years but I'm scared to because I know I'm going to miss him so much. Can anyone give me some advice on whether this is normal or if it means I shouldn't do it? Here is some background on the reasons I have ...
A. 9 December 2012: Your relationship is already over, but you haven't wanted to see it until now:
1. Only going to his house -- he complains about money, yet goes and parties with his friends? He's 25, not 18. Do not make excuses about his age. If he was into you... (read in full...)
I'm worried for my sister who's involved with a known cheater.Can cheaters ever change?
Q. Can cheaters really change? I ask because my sister has started going out with a guy I know from uni who has cheated on all of his past girlfriends and I am a bit worried. He was always quite open about his cheating with his friends (they were all ...
A. 9 December 2012: You're absolutely right. This guy will cheat on your sister and devastate her. He won't outgrow his behavior because he's a serial cheater. It's one thing to have done it once at age 18, but over and over again, setting up alibis and bragging ... (read in full...)
In the beginning he would not listen to my 'no'. But now I think he's cheating and telling lies. What should I do?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend since High School, we broke up and became friends during my last two years of High School so we started dating other people. When i started my first year in college he was not going to school so he would come to my ...
A. 9 December 2012: He *is* a cheater. Why was he kissing on you while he was with his girlfriend? You know he's a cheater!
He's a liar. He ignored your calls until he got busted when you hid his number.
He doesn't love you. He pressured you to kiss him and ... (read in full...)
What can you suggest? I'm faithful always, but I feel like she holding my sex life hostage.
Q. I'm 29 and my girlfriend is 27. We've been together for 5 years, lived together for 4. Our relationship is and has been going well in most respects. We rarely argue and suit each other nicely. Unfortunately we have fairly different sex drives...
A. 9 December 2012: I hate to say it, but it won't get any better. You are both sexually incompatible. It's not stress, or a special occasion, or a temporary fix. It's one thing if you were wanting it twice-per-day and she's only wanting it three times per week. ... (read in full...)
My B/f snores at night and I cant sleep!
Q. Does anyone have any advice for my situation? I have been with my boyfriend only a few months. I am 23 he is 27.His an amazing guy and we get along like a house on fire. My problem is, he snores at night and i cant sleep! His a bit overweight a...
A. 9 December 2012: Two life-saving words: Ear Plugs. I need them twice per year when my husband's allergies flare up and make both of us miserable for a couple of weeks when his blocked-up sinuses cause him to snore like a chainsaw when he usually doesn't.
Other... (read in full...)
How can I ask my girlfriend to have anal sex with me?
Q. Hi, i need some advice from the ladies. I have a wonderful girlfriend and we love each other very much. I love her to bits and she is super hot. I would like to have anal sex with her, i noticed that when i touch her, or lick her there, it arous...
A. 9 December 2012: I agree with Ciar and count yourself very lucky if she's game to try.
If she says yes, don't just go from zero to penetration! You know that lubricant is absolutely critically essential. Do not take anything you see or have ever seen on porn as ... (read in full...)
Female Boss Sending Flirty Winkies Boils Over Into Sexual Harassment?
Q. Female board member flirty texts my husband numerous times per day w/ lots of ;)winky smiles, etc. She constantly leans in and whispers in his ear in public and even takes my seat when I get up. I think she follows school events and knows where to ...
A. 5 December 2012: Oh man. First of all, I'm sorry your husband has to go through this. Second of all, I'm sorry YOU have to go through this. You're a good wife to confront him head on when you did, because your husband is in a very uncomfortable bind when it comes ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my wife a few weeks before we got married and now I am constantly worried she will find out.
Q. I cheated on my wife a few weeks before we got married and now I am constantly worried she will find out. Im not proud of myself and would change it if I could but I cant. I didn't have sex with this other women, she gave me a handjob on my stag ...
A. 5 December 2012: I would definitely say that now is the time to tell her, BEFORE the house and before kids. You do not want this hanging over your marriage. This also raises issues with you in regards to your own self-control. What if this happened again, and you ... (read in full...)
I want to know who my boyfriend's ex FWB is, and he wont tell me.
Q. My boyfriend of almost two years came out and told me recently he had a few things he needed to tell me one of them which was he went on two separate occasions with a woman he basically had as a "sex buddy" prior to our relationship. He says they ...
A. 5 December 2012: Heh. I love being an aunt sometimes, especially when a glaring answer comes out without it meaning to.
You, OP, just got one of your answers. You said that he said
"this woman certainly doesnt really care that he is in a relationship,cau... (read in full...)
I thought we were in a committed relationship, but he's been dating someone else while dating me.
Q. I have been dating a man for 9 months now. All along I have considered this a serious, mognogamous relationship. I recently found out that until about a month ago he had been dating another woman as well. I was crushed, but he said until now he ...
A. 5 December 2012: Oh yes. This one is very simple. Here are the questions:
1. Is your relationship sexual?
2. Did he tell you that he was dating other people while he was dating you?
3. Did he tell HER that he was dating you while he was seeing her?... (read in full...)
I want to know who my boyfriend's ex FWB is, and he wont tell me.
Q. My boyfriend of almost two years came out and told me recently he had a few things he needed to tell me one of them which was he went on two separate occasions with a woman he basically had as a "sex buddy" prior to our relationship. He says they ...
A. 5 December 2012: I know that opinions will differ here, but in my opinion, the issue here isn't simply who it is, but whether or not she is still in his life.
You have a right to know if this woman is too close for comfort, and the issue of "confusion" is a BS iss... (read in full...)
How can I deal with his insecurity?
Q. I have recently started seeing this guy for a couple of weeks now and when we are together things are amazing! We have moved really quickly- but have agreed anythinst sexual is too far for this stage. The only thing is, he is INCREDIBLY insecure. He ...
A. 5 December 2012: I think you need to give him reality here. He's acting this way because he is looking for attention. It's almost like a vampire sucking blood out of a person.
Am I guessing right when I say that he is sucking the attention from you, and you'... (read in full...)
Was I wrong to end my long term relationship over my boyfriend's porn habits?
Q. I have always had a problem with my boyfriend’s porn use and we would get into fights about it where he would promise one day he would give it up when he was satisfied with our sex life. I would then promise to let it go and stop snooping on him. ...
A. 4 December 2012: You didn't make a mistake. He was a porn addict, which is different than the occasional discreet porn user.
His porn was interfering with your relationship, in that he couldn't stay hard because of his porn use, and that he was doing it almos... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend bisexual if he's had multiple homosexual relations in the past but claims he doesn't like men?
Q. I'm a woman. My 33 year old boyfriend of 6 months recently admitted to me that when he was a preteen, him and 2 if his best friends would masturbate together, rub on each other and give each other oral. This happened for over a year. He also just ...
A. 4 December 2012: Actually, Jannie's on the right track, but I'd go a step farther here and say that this is sounds creepy.
The only time you ever hear about a guy talking about this sort of thing with his current love interest and going into this much detail i... (read in full...)
Boyfriend and I had a small argument and I haven't heard from him at all
Q. Yesterday afternoon we were on the phone and had a small argument. I wasnt aware of my tone and how I said it but he asked me where I was going (i was driving home from school) and I said "Where else would I go? I'm going home" and he got defensive ...
A. 4 December 2012: I know this can't be easy. What really drove this home for me was that he was emotionally punishing you by playing a game which YOU bought him, and the legendary edition on top of that (you dropped a cool $100 at least on him), yet he treats you ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend and I had a small argument and I haven't heard from him at all
Q. Yesterday afternoon we were on the phone and had a small argument. I wasnt aware of my tone and how I said it but he asked me where I was going (i was driving home from school) and I said "Where else would I go? I'm going home" and he got defensive ...
A. 3 December 2012: The reason why we date at all is to get to know someone well. Sure, we get those love chemicals and feelings mixed in there, but we spend the time we do dating and being in a relationship to get to know the person well and vice versa.
In this who... (read in full...)
How can I express my dissatisfaction with my boyfriend more effectively?
Q. how do i tell my boyfriend of 3 yrs im not happy, he hardly touches me anymore, i want to try for a baby but he dont, it dont seem like we r in a relationship its like we just exsist, we live together we argue 50% of the time, aand half the time it ...
A. 2 December 2012: Break up with him.
By the way, you can't ever pressure someone into having a baby with you. Sounds like you want to use a baby to keep him in your life, and that's really not a good thing to do.
Pressuring someone to have a baby with you wh... (read in full...)
Boyfriend and I had a small argument and I haven't heard from him at all
Q. Yesterday afternoon we were on the phone and had a small argument. I wasnt aware of my tone and how I said it but he asked me where I was going (i was driving home from school) and I said "Where else would I go? I'm going home" and he got defensive ...
A. 2 December 2012: Nope. Leave it.
It's interesting that you've always been the one to call first and say sorry? His ego wants that all the time now. He wants to you grovel and smooth his feathers, or he wouldn't have said "Well you better be".
Also, if you ... (read in full...)
What gives girls the right to be angry with men who did not respond to their advances and rejected them in the past?
Q. A little over a month ago I moved back to my hometown after many years of absence. Since returning I have had a few "blast from the past" encounters (in the shape of eye contact and non-verbal communication only, mostly over the frozen chicken isle ...
A. 2 December 2012: What gives girls the right?? Well, I think they're no longer interested in you. You were a jerk in the past, and they got over it, and got over you.
Interesting that in the past, you blew off women right and left because you were immature... (read in full...)
I'm in a relationship, but my high sex drive has caused me to have feelings for someone I shouldn't. What should I do?
Q. Hi everyone, Just a little background on my problem. I am in a LDR of two and a half years. I see my boyfriend several times a year, and we are completely and totally in love. I have a remarkably high sex drive, but our sexual relationship bar...
A. 1 December 2012: How would you feel if your LDR boyfriend cheated on you with another girl (made out, didn't have sex), and then kept her around as his supposed "best friend"? Would you be 100% happy that she's still in his life and he has urges to have sex with ... (read in full...)
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