I cheated on my workaholic wife -- now what?
Q. I have been married for 10 years and have two kids under the age of 10. My wife recently was made an executive at her fortune 200 firm and has not been home much since. She leaves for work around 7 AM and most evenings she gets home after 10 PM. ...
A. 4 October 2012: "Putting kids in harm's way".
Sorry I wasn't clear enough.
As parents, no matter what, we protect our kids from some of the worst stress we as adults sometimes endure. What if the husband took the kids into the wife's office and caught the w... (read in full...)
We recently gave our virginity to each other but my boyfriend wants to wait before having sex again
Q. Hello everyone, My boyfriend and I (we are both 24) recently lost our virginity to each other. We talked about it together vaguely for about 2 months before, and seriously for about a month before we had sex. We have been seeing each other for a...
A. 4 October 2012: I think you're okay. Guys are very sensitive to their performance, and also, losing his virginity was a momentous thing for him too.
Just give him lots of love and affirmation. Tell him how incredible being close to him feels, and that you thin... (read in full...)
I cheated on my workaholic wife -- now what?
Q. I have been married for 10 years and have two kids under the age of 10. My wife recently was made an executive at her fortune 200 firm and has not been home much since. She leaves for work around 7 AM and most evenings she gets home after 10 PM. ...
A. 4 October 2012: There's something else that bothered me about your post:
You have two kids under the age of 10...one of them being a 3-year old. Upon suspecting that your wife was cheating, you woke your kids up to bring them to your wife's place of business... (read in full...)
How realistic is it for me to want to date only uncircumcised men?
Q. I know this may make me shallow, childish, immature, but it's how I feel: Three years ago I was engaged to a man from Europe. He was uncircumcised; it was not my first experience with an intact man. I loved it so much, and he was so gentle wi...
A. 4 October 2012: Hmm...if you're open to date non-Jewish men, I think it's not unreasonable. If you're dating Jewish men only, you know that finding one who is uncircumcised is rare, since the choice to circumcise is made for a guy by his parents as a baby.
In my... (read in full...)
I cheated on my workaholic wife -- now what?
Q. I have been married for 10 years and have two kids under the age of 10. My wife recently was made an executive at her fortune 200 firm and has not been home much since. She leaves for work around 7 AM and most evenings she gets home after 10 PM. ...
A. 4 October 2012: That sounds noble, EXCEPT that you've ALREADY cheated on her!!! You can't take a moral high ground since you've destroyed your relationship now!
Not only that, but you criticize her for working the long hours (and passing your marital loyalty ... (read in full...)
I always have to prompt b/f to wear a condom. Is this normal?
Q. Hi, Hope you can help. I have recently started a new relationship with a guy. Now I am not very sexually experienced but know we have to be careful, so am on the pill. Everytime we slept together I have had to prompt my boyfriend to wear a condom...
A. 3 October 2012: You need to break up with him. The pill doesn't protect against herpes, HIV, and a host of other really bad and permanent STD's. The withdrawal method doesn't protect one bit against disease either.
It's *not* a mistake in the heat of the mome... (read in full...)
I always have to prompt b/f to wear a condom. Is this normal?
Q. Hi, Hope you can help. I have recently started a new relationship with a guy. Now I am not very sexually experienced but know we have to be careful, so am on the pill. Everytime we slept together I have had to prompt my boyfriend to wear a condom...
A. 3 October 2012: Listen, this guy is *really* bad news.
This guy does not respect you, because no guy should have to be "prompted" to wear a condom every time, and more disturbingly, you had the conversation with him already about always wanting a condom during e... (read in full...)
My husband contributes and so does my Mom. Is my boyfriend contributing enough to live most of the time in my home?
Q. I've been separated from my husband for over 2 years. I have a boyfriend and we have been dating for 2 years. I live in a house with my three sons and my Mother. My ex husband presently pays $3500 per month for the mortgage and taxes He also gi...
A. 3 October 2012: I did some math:
Your ex is giving you $6200/month.
Your mom is giving you $100/month. Does she live with you?
Your boyfriend is giving you an average of $600/month.
You're getting $6900-$7000/month. How much are YOU paying to support y... (read in full...)
I stripped down to my boxers on a webcam. Now I'm afraid I'm on a porn site!
Q. Hello, Please help me, I can't get this out of my mind. I guess I did something very stupid. About a year ago I went to a chatbox and chatted with a girl. We continued on msn-messenger and then she asked me if I wanted to use the webcam. I agreed...
A. 3 October 2012: You're okay. You were in boxers. Porn sites usually involve genitalia and sex acts. Another thing that's in your favor is that it was a year ago, and she's likely deleted it by now. If you haven't heard anything by now, a year on the internet is ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with this? My Bf is constantly implying how much better things would be when we go all the way
Q. hello everybody. i'm in a great relationship for about eight months now - thing is, i'm a virgin, and my boyfriend, who is older and more experienced is not exactly sensitive about it. i mean, he doesn't do anything i'm uncomfortable with, but he's...
A. 3 October 2012: Oh man, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but if you've been trying to have sex and it's been painful, does that mean that he penetrates you? Because his putting his penis into you, even slightly, is enough to make you no longer a virgin ... (read in full...)
How can I get my girlfriend to show anger like a normal person?
Q. My girlfriend never gets mad. She just never gets impatient or annoyed or frazzled or frustrated. It's come to the point when I just want to instigate fights to get a reaction out of her. I push her, and push and push, but she nevers gets angry. W...
A. 3 October 2012: You're contradicting yourself.
You said she has an "outward lack of emotions", and then you say "i can see it in her eyes that she does, but she never actually acts pissed. it's like she adopts this really peaceful look and that's all i get. ". ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my workaholic wife -- now what?
Q. I have been married for 10 years and have two kids under the age of 10. My wife recently was made an executive at her fortune 200 firm and has not been home much since. She leaves for work around 7 AM and most evenings she gets home after 10 PM. ...
A. 3 October 2012: You're asking whether or not you should honor your vows or stay with her and whatnot? Sorry, but you had that choice before you cheated, and you have now gone past the point of no return in terms of your choices.
I do not have any sympathy... (read in full...)
Need to tell him I've got feelings for some-one else, but how? What should I say? I feel terrible.
Q. How the hell do you tell a guy you've been on a few dates with that you have feelings for someone else? I've been out with this guy a few times and I do like him so much, but the problem is that this guy who I met much before the one i'm seeing now, ...
A. 2 October 2012: You say that the guy you're with you've only been on a few dates? Why do you have to tell him you have feelings for someone else? Why not just say that you feel that your feelings for him are more friendship than relationship, and tell him that ... (read in full...)
They say I am being selfish. I love my brother but giving everything up to care for him for the rest of his life seems too much.
Q. Little bit about myself first. I am 46 years old and the youngest of 4 siblings also i am gay. The only one in my family and my family history. Unlike my brothers i was quick to get out of school and left at 16. Unlike my brothers i have never ...
A. 2 October 2012: You are part of a family of 5. This doesn't have to be all on you, and you need to earn a living.
Your brothers carry as much obligation as you do when it comes to your parents and your brother. You living there and you not being married ... (read in full...)
Attracted to my fiancee's older brother.
Q. My fiancee and I have been together for almost three years now, and we have a 1 1/2 year old daughter together. I'm about to be 20, and he just turned 19 in August. We're going to get married here in the next month or so. Now, my problem is, I've...
A. 2 October 2012: If he wasn't thinking of moving in with you, I'd say the best course of action is to "starve" the attraction, meaning to have as little contact with the brother as possible.
However, the brother possibly moving in with you changes things. If the ... (read in full...)
Now that myself and the guy I like are single, what can I do to make him want me?
Q. Hi guys. I'm a twenty year old girl and I really like this guy who is in his 30's (so much so that I think I love him). I've always liked older men; it's just who I am. Anyway, I have known this guy for three years now and when we first met we h...
A. 2 October 2012: It sounds like he already wants you. Just level with him what your feelings for him are, and make sure you have zero contact with your ex. It won't matter if your ex is upset if he is out of your life. If you're keeping your ex in your life, you ... (read in full...)
How can I get my girlfriend to show anger like a normal person?
Q. My girlfriend never gets mad. She just never gets impatient or annoyed or frazzled or frustrated. It's come to the point when I just want to instigate fights to get a reaction out of her. I push her, and push and push, but she nevers gets angry. W...
A. 2 October 2012: What??? You have a girlfriend who cares about you and has control of her emotions, and all you want to do is push her, argue her, and most scary of all, get her to break??
The problem is with you, not her.
It's not normal that people fight in ... (read in full...)
His ex has nothing to lose and won't go away
Q. What do I do about a completely insane psychopathic ex girlfriend of my boyfriend? She is the type they make movies about. She is worse. He warned me when we first started dating of everything she would do and he was right. It seems like no ...
A. 2 October 2012: Yeah, there's not much you can do about this. Your boyfriend is the one who must act, and to be honest, if she's this crazy, you should get out of the relationship, because if what she's done is too much for you to put down on here, then you should ... (read in full...)
Should I send the evidence of his cheating to his wife? I wasted a year of my life with him and want revenge....
Q. I met a guy on a dating site who told me he was seperated, he told me he loved me after 2 weeks, he then told me he was still with the wife and begged me not to finsh it with him, he left her the week after, we had been seeing each other for over a ...
A. 1 October 2012: Actually, you're still wasting your life on this guy. You may think you're not, but you still very much are.
I agree with the aunts who said that you should have run from a guy who said he was separated (not divorced), and especially that he ... (read in full...)
I found a lot of disturbing things on his pc and I'm worried about my children
Q. Hello i really need help with this its killing me. Ive just moved my boyfriend in and he bought his pc wellni looked at it and found loads of lolicon on it. It was horrible and my head is so messed up, we have been friend years then i started dating ...
A. 1 October 2012: He *is* a nasty man. He is beyond nasty, because the screams of toddlers didn't even enter his mind when he derived sexual pleasure from pictures of their abuse.
Serial killers, rapists, child molesters, pretty much all of them hate themselv... (read in full...)
I found a lot of disturbing things on his pc and I'm worried about my children
Q. Hello i really need help with this its killing me. Ive just moved my boyfriend in and he bought his pc wellni looked at it and found loads of lolicon on it. It was horrible and my head is so messed up, we have been friend years then i started dating ...
A. 1 October 2012: It may only be illustrations and not actual photos depicting children doing unspeakable acts, but it most certainly IS a neon flashing sign that he is sexually turned on by little girls like your daughters. Every day he's in your house, he is ... (read in full...)
I like my best friend's brother, but should I tell him?
Q. Okay so my best friends brother is amazingly cute and I sadly like him alot and he works down the street from my job and with out fail he comes and visits me at least to 4 times a week with out fail . He doesn't even work.on saturdays and he'll ...
A. 30 September 2012: Did you talk to your best friend about this? She is the person you should talk to first. It's just what you do!... (read in full...)
He isn't ready for a relationship, but I really like him!
Q. I need help or advice .There's this guy in my English class that i really like .he already knows that i like him and he told me that he just wasn't ready for a relationship just yet due to past ones ,and that he just wanted to be friends. we are ...
A. 30 September 2012: I would disconnect yourself from him emotionally. Guys say what they mean most of the time, but in this case, him saying "I'm not ready for a relationship" really means "I don't want a relationship with YOU". I know this because there are ... (read in full...)
I really fancy her, and she said she'd want to lose her 'V' to me, but now what?
Q. hi, added this girl on FB a while ago and after a lot of chatting and stuff i managed to get her number (she is 16, i am 19) so we have been texting and flirting hinting to each other that we should meet up and stuff, i went away for the weekend to ...
A. 30 September 2012: You don't fancy her. You fancy your own penis.
You have no relationship with this woman, are bored with any texting except sexual texting, and she was drunk and talking about you taking her virginity. Now, all you're caring about is taking t... (read in full...)
I found a lot of disturbing things on his pc and I'm worried about my children
Q. Hello i really need help with this its killing me. Ive just moved my boyfriend in and he bought his pc wellni looked at it and found loads of lolicon on it. It was horrible and my head is so messed up, we have been friend years then i started dating ...
A. 30 September 2012: GET HIM OUT OF YOUR HOUSE!!!
Like do it NOW! He is a serious and imminent danger to your daughters. Get the police to help you! Child pornography is illegal, and that alone will get him arrested.
Oh my god. I wouldn't even wait one se... (read in full...)
Why is he lying to me if he isn't doing anything wrong?
Q. I am in a new relationship, have been with the guy for about ten months now. It has recently turned into a long distance thing which is fine as I have done it before. I trust him.. or at least I did. He is gud friends with a girl, which is fine, ex...
A. 30 September 2012: I agree with Honeypie. This other girl is an ego thing for him. While it's not a crime to have female platonic friends, there are boundaries that exist that are unique, the biggest one being that YOU come first, and that he would never have any ... (read in full...)
Afraid that losing my virginity will hurt ...
Q. Ok so I'm terrified of losing my viginity. I'm in a relationship he's asked me to marry him but i know it won't last anyway i like this guy in school and i think he likes me back and i want to lose it to him. But im terrified of penetration. How bad ...
A. 29 September 2012: STOP!!!!!!!!!!
Listen to me!
Do *not* lose your virginity. If I was a good liar, I'd tell you that losing your virginity feels like someone stabbing you in the hoohah with a rusty paring knife and twisting for 10 minutes straight while y... (read in full...)
I need a way of telling my boyfriend that I want exclusivity and a serious relationship without him feeling like he has to give up his freedom
Q. I have been seeing this guy for about 5 weeks and one week ago we had a talk about where our relationship was going. He said he "cant commit" until college finishes up in one or so months because everything is so busy etc. and asked me what I would ...
A. 28 September 2012: "I dont need opinions on whether you think he is lying to me or not to keep me around."
"I need a way of telling him that I want exclusivity and a serious relationship without him feeling like he has to give up his life (freedom etc.)"
OP, whe... (read in full...)
My threesomes have come back to haunt me
Q. I am really in a bind and I don't know what to do. A little over a year ago I met my now fiancé. When we met we clicked instantly and became an item right away. He is charming, intelligent, attractive, educated and an all around great guy. About...
A. 27 September 2012: YIKES! The anonymous male guy some posts back really hit it on the head here! The whole sordid "threesome" past is only 50% of the issue. Yes, it's serious because you portrayed your sexual history as different from what it really is.
The H... (read in full...)
Why does he get an iPad? It's not fair!
Q. Today I came home from school and found my little brother with a brand-new iPad. I am so freakin jealous of him! My parents said its only "because he needs a certain app for social skills." (he has aspergers so he needs help) I still don't ...
A. 26 September 2012: Ahh, sibling rivalry at its best. Isn't it crazy how family can press your buttons in a way that NOBODY else ever can?
In this case, your brother's being a dork. You *know* your parents don't love him more than you. Just tell him to choke on... (read in full...)
Is he being honest or is this his way of trying to end things?
Q. Over a month ago I met this guy in a bar. He seemed like a nice guy but I was not particularly physically attracted to him and I was only recently out of a six year relationship at the time and only looking for superficial relationship (so hot guys ...
A. 26 September 2012: He would have been honest with you if he hadn't had sex with you. His "I haven't gotten over my ex" speech should have been BEFORE he got in the sack to be credible.
I think you were a conquest for his ego, and his sleeping with you was "objecti... (read in full...)
Why does he get an iPad? It's not fair!
Q. Today I came home from school and found my little brother with a brand-new iPad. I am so freakin jealous of him! My parents said its only "because he needs a certain app for social skills." (he has aspergers so he needs help) I still don't ...
A. 26 September 2012: I actually don't think this is a troll post. My son was just talking about how his school uses ipads during daily work, and how much he really wants one. I don't want to call the OP a brat or spoiled. When we were young, many of us had tunnel ... (read in full...)
Should I run or is he just insecure from being divorced twice?
Q. I'm frustrated and have told my boyfriend this on many an occasion. He is smart but I sometimes feel he is trying to outsmart me and tries to make me feel it's just in my head that I think he has too many issues and is clingy. He insists I answer...
A. 25 September 2012: This is not insecurity from being divorced twice. I'm guessing the women who divorced him ran screaming from the marriage, as these behaviors seem very long ingrained.
You need to run, and in fact you should have done so before you both mov... (read in full...)
Boyfriend needs to understand that sex isn't just about what he wants
Q. hey guys, i am 19 years old and my boyfriend is 16. We've been seeing each other for just over a year and about 6 months ago we had sex for the first time and it was his first time. even though it was his first time, he lasted longer than most and...
A. 25 September 2012: Tell him to lay off the porn, because you're not a sex toy! You have a say in what happens and how often. You're not a sex slave, so don't act like one! Fear is a terrible aphrodisiac.
Also, tell him that if he wants anal, he's going to first al... (read in full...)
Why does he get an iPad? It's not fair!
Q. Today I came home from school and found my little brother with a brand-new iPad. I am so freakin jealous of him! My parents said its only "because he needs a certain app for social skills." (he has aspergers so he needs help) I still don't ...
A. 25 September 2012: You went to surf camp in Florida and he didn't, plus you have an ipod touch. Sounds comparable, but you're so fixated on your brother's ipad.
You have the power to earn your own ipad, and your brother could think that it's unfair that he's goi... (read in full...)
Guys, would you have reacted in the same way as my boyfriend to the fact that I am a virgin at 20?
Q. So this guy i'm seeing we were getting really close and things were intense, I wanted to go the whole way but I stopped him and said I can't i'm still a virgin, but told him I want to, just not yet. I'm ready, i'm just not sure yet if I want to...
A. 23 September 2012: Okay, there are TWO things you should learn from this, and the first one was pretty much covered by the other aunts, and the second one was missed except by Honeypie:
1. He's not good material. Being a jerk and pretty much saying that you shou... (read in full...)
What should I do about this resentment that he won't try to lose the weight he has gained?
Q. In March, I started dating a guy I've known for 4-5 years. In may, I decided that I wanted to lose weight and since then, I've lost about 25 pounds, but here's the problem. My boyfriend was about 20 pounds overweight when we made it official, but ...
A. 23 September 2012: Yeah, that's a tough one. 50-60 hours a week is really rough, and adding more for a workout may feel daunting.
His diet is the key here, as well as "in-work" changes, like stairs instead of the elevator, working out on a lunch break, eating h... (read in full...)
I've been caught stealing and my employers know about it, they have given me 2 options, so what do I do now?
Q. I have been working for my company as a new business rep for 4 and a half years and always been good. I normally get my lunch from a supermarket down the road from my office but about a month ago, i had some fraud done on my bank and while it got...
A. 23 September 2012: "The store and his employer are separate entities. Neither of them can leverage the other. In fact, since he has not been convicted, the store besmirching his reputation with his employer is actionable in a civil suit."
This is true to a point, b... (read in full...)
Why wont my 59 year old boyfriend make love to me?
Q. why wont my boyfriend make love to me? im 56 and he is 59, we have been together now for a year. i care about him deeply and hope that we can spend the rest of our lives together. we get along great other then this one thing. he wants other sexu...
A. 22 September 2012: Yep, it could be EDD, even if he maintains an erection during oral sex or masturbation. EDD would be psychological for him and be tied to performance anxiety or some other emotional holdout related to some past baggage.
This is a tough one to a... (read in full...)
My boyfriend of 2 months creeps me out!
Q. My boyfriend and I have only been going out for about two months. Lately, though, it seems as if every little thing he does annoys me or creeps me out. He's constantly making fun of me and he brings the gift I gave him (a stuffed monkey) weeks ago ...
A. 22 September 2012: You are not responsible for what he might do to himself. That is emotional blackmail if he has hinted that to you.
You need to do what is best for you, and if he does harm to himself, that is on him, not you. The longer you wait, the more dif... (read in full...)
I've been caught stealing and my employers know about it, they have given me 2 options, so what do I do now?
Q. I have been working for my company as a new business rep for 4 and a half years and always been good. I normally get my lunch from a supermarket down the road from my office but about a month ago, i had some fraud done on my bank and while it got...
A. 22 September 2012: The thing you should not focus on is your immediate punishment for your crime, as the anon focused on. Yes, you may get probation, or community service, or a fine.
The issue is your criminal record. A petty larceny conviction is a really r... (read in full...)
I've been caught stealing and my employers know about it, they have given me 2 options, so what do I do now?
Q. I have been working for my company as a new business rep for 4 and a half years and always been good. I normally get my lunch from a supermarket down the road from my office but about a month ago, i had some fraud done on my bank and while it got...
A. 21 September 2012: Yeah, their offer of resignation is a gesture of mercy, because your life will be pretty much hosed by a theft conviction on your permanent record. They have proof on their camera.
Have you offered other options? This supermarket obviousl... (read in full...)
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