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... Send *asteofIndia a private message | | | *asteofIndia's profile:TasteofIndia here. I'm 33 years old, with my BA in Theater & Psychology. I suppose you could say that I have studied people and how to get into their heads. I've been here on Dear Cupid for well over a decade. I love Dear Abby, Ann Landers, all those advice giving goddesses... when I found this website how could I resist?? (Couldn't.) I love Dear Cupid, love being a moderator and love giving advice when I can!!
A lot of people ask if I'm from India... just to clear things up, I'm not. I'm not Indian, I just really liked that song by Aerosmith when I first made this account. I've never been to India. I'm not even an Aerosmith fan, really, but I really liked that song at the time.
I've been with my fella for 14 years, married for 10. We have two cool daughters and a pretty cool life that involves lots of adventure, art and laughter.
I adore: positivity, theater, llamas, fromage, sweatpants, earrings, and sitcoms. That just about sums it up... |
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My gf loves giving me BJ's but I don't want her to do that. How do I tell her?
Q. hi there I'm a guy n my gf loves to have oral sex.......she just looks for the right time and tells me to pull my pants down......i tell her that i don't like it but still she wants to lick my penis....i feel ticklish and i fear if she bites it....
A. 3 February 2007: Hey there,
I don't even want to know how old you are. I really don't. But, I'm going to pretend like you're 'of age', all though I think maybe with age you'll grow to like oral sex.
You really need to TALK to your girlfriend. If you're comfor... (read in full...)
Anal sex hurt like hell for me--is it supposed to hurt the first time?
Q. Is anal supposed to hurt the first time? First few times? I tried it with my bf and it was the most painful thing I'd ever experienced!!! Is this normal? We used a condom that was heavily lubed, but it still killed! Is this normal?...
A. 2 February 2007: Heck YES it's supposed to hurt the first time. Losing your virginity can hurt, well... so can butt sex. Eventually your body will adjust. It will always be a little uncomfortable at first, but it will get better. Make sure you're nice and relaxed ... (read in full...)
When your bf or gf stops doing 'the little things' does that mean that they don't care anymore?
Q. I've seen a lot of posts on here about people saying after xx years (usually 1-3), their bf/fiance/husband just doesn't seem to do the 'little things' anymore (like call alot, text, want to cuddle not just for sex, bring flowers, pay compliments, ...
A. 1 February 2007: Hi there,
Ahhh, the "little things". I think it's a comfort thing, yes. We're assuming we're talking man-to-woman 'little things'... well, I think guys put a LOT of effort in those first couple of years. They're still courting you! They want to ... (read in full...)
My husband of 25 years slept w/ a prostitute and got an STD! He doesn't want to leave me and our daughter, but I can't face staying w/ him!
Q. i have been married for 25 years, have a 5 year old daughter. my husband has come home with a sexual disease. he admitted he has been with a prostitute. i told him to leave and he said he was sorry and that he loved us both and did't want to go. i...
A. 1 February 2007: Everyone has given you pretty stable advice, and I'm just going to reiterate it all.
If you stay with your husband, you're going to be miserable. He disgusts you and you hate him. Your daughter doesn't want to see that. In fact, if she does see... (read in full...)
My husband says he can't see himself as a father!
Q. Hi, what do you do when your husband has stated that he can't see himself as a father. Before we were married - we even spoke about baby names whenever we decided to have children. I would love to have children someday, not ready at the moment, ...
A. 1 February 2007: Hey darlin',
I think it's very important that you talk to your husband about this as soon as you can. Now, if he seems really dubious about children, I wouldn't say, "well, sorry. Either we have them, or I'm leaving.", because feelings can chan... (read in full...)
I found out she had an affair with a married man...and I can't get past it! What can I do?
Q. My wife has led a very checked past. She had sex from a very early age with many men, several times with total strangers, and has even experienced (once) sex with 2 men at the same time. When we dated, she told me all of this and I thought I could ...
A. 1 February 2007: You seem like a good man and she seems like a good woman. I know it's hard to hear this sort of thing, and I know you realize that the past is the past.
I think it's important to ecognize that your wife was young and didn't know what it was like... (read in full...)
I'm 25, male and I've fallen for a 15 year old female online! Do I go for it?
Q. Hey there i'm not regular to this site but hope someone might like to give me advice. . . . . . I'm a 25 year old man, i do not have a job as I quit a few months back and I'm a writer. . . I drink most nights a week and live with my parents....
A. 30 January 2007: If you were 30 and she was 20, then I'd say alright. However, this is a 15 year old girl. At this point in a woman's life, she's curious about men, vulnerable and I might venture to say - naïve. She's only a sophomore in high school, if tat. Do you ... (read in full...)
This 42 year old guy needs a place to stay-his wife kicked him out-he's hot-should I let him stay with me?
Q. Ok this might sound kinda weird but stick with me. I'm almost 18 (one more month!) and I'm a freshman in college. My room mate is like never here. Basically she's living with her boyfriend but the college thinks she lives in the dorm. ANYWAY im...
A. 30 January 2007: Sounds sketchy to me. You meet this guy in MCDONALD'S and suddenly it's okay for him to stay in your house? You have no idea what this guy has done in the past. Maybe his wife didn't kick him out, maybe he is a serial killer and he tells all women ... (read in full...)
Is a piece of very expensive clothing, a much too personal to give someone else's husband?
Q. I am married to a very handsome and successful man. A neighbor, newly single, gave us gifts at Christmas that were larger than I expected. They gifts for me were items for the house (the price stickers were highlighted so I suspect that they were ...
A. 30 January 2007: Hey sweetness,
I'd let this go. Like CD said, do you know how hard it is to find a nice gift for a man? Pretty hard. I think she found a nice thing to give to him. And she gave you some gifts too... don't worry about what the price tag says. Ma... (read in full...)
I'm scared for my friend who has casual sex with any age guy who asks her. She's only 15!!
Q. hi i have a problem its my friend she is well seeing this guy who is 28 years old and engaged and well she knows this and she is only 15 yrs old and shes having sex with him and many others ever since she turned 15 she has being having sex with who ...
A. 29 January 2007: Hey darlin',
I think that you should take your friend to the nearest Planned Parenthood (if you have one near you), or a free health clinic to talk to some professionals about safe sex. Get her on the pill and with a full pocket of condoms.... (read in full...)
My rich parents think it's rude that my unemployed bf doesn't offer to take them out to eat.
Q. My parents were telling me they think my boyfriend should offer to pay for dining out sometimes. They expect him to treat my entire family out. I don't know how to tell him without him thinking how petty my parents are. He is very polite and thanks ...
A. 29 January 2007: CD always has good advice, and I'm just going to be seconding a few of her suggestions. I think that having him invite them over to his place for dinner is a FABULOUS idea. It's personal, it's considerate, it's classy.
I also think if your par... (read in full...)
He couldn't orgasm! Was it because he was drunk or was I not good enough?
Q. why couldn't my boyfriend come?? on saturday me and my boyfriend went out together, he got drunk, we then went to havre sex in his car, however after an hour he still hadn't come, so he 'had to finish him self off'...was it because he was d...
A. 29 January 2007: Girl, I am 95% sure it was the alcohol. That can do that to guys. Too many drinks and their 'little friend' gets just as drunk and incompetent as they are. Don't you worry. On your next SOBER sexcapade, I'm sure it'll work just fine.
xxInd... (read in full...)
During sex he got too rough and wouldn't stop! I love him but this has me hurt and confused..what should I do?
Q. well last night i went to the pub, with my boyfriend and our 2 mates. we were all having a good laugh and drinking. and me and paul* were pretty horny, so when we got home we had sex. bout an hour after we did it again. and for some reason it kinda ...
A. 29 January 2007: There is NO excuse for what that douche bag did. I don't care if he was drunk. I don't care if he was horny! Screw him. If it's hurting you, and guy should have the decency to stop and take care of you, not treat you like an object for their weird ... (read in full...)
He's more interested in his computer and his ipod...than me! What can I do?
Q. I've been married for 10 years, have 2 kids and for the last 3 years have had sex with my husband maybe 3 times. I wear size 4 clothes, run at least 3 times a day try very hard not to look frumpy and even where sexy nightgowns. Everything I do ...
A. 29 January 2007: I see a lot of problems in this marriage right now. You're being neglected, both emotionally and sexually. He is preoccupied and distancing himself. You've tried marriage counseling for the both of you and it's not working?
Well, I think it's tim... (read in full...)
Should I let my fiancee invite all his ex gf's to our wedding?
Q. Ok, so I am getting married in a few months and I obviously don't want to invite any of my ex-boyfriends because I think it would make my fiance feel uncomfortable. He on the other hand wants to invite almost all his ex-girlfriends. He claims they ...
A. 29 January 2007: I understand why you're upset. However, girl - he's marrying YOU! Not anyone else, just YOU! If I got married, I would definitely shoot a number of ex-boyfriend's an invitation. They're good friends now! I would want to be invited to their ... (read in full...)
I'm so in love with my boyfriend. The only thing I want is a baby with him...Why?
Q. I love babies...Oh my Gosh, do I LOVE babies! I want one so bad, but I know I'm way too young to have one. I don't have a job, but my boyfriend does. It's not a very well-paying job, though. For this reason, I know having a baby wouldn't be the ...
A. 28 January 2007: P.S.
I just read over my long, long answer. Oh my LORD. So many typos. I just had to apologize. I hope my answer is coherant enough for you to understand. Sorry!! :o)
xxIndia... (read in full...)
I'm so in love with my boyfriend. The only thing I want is a baby with him...Why?
Q. I love babies...Oh my Gosh, do I LOVE babies! I want one so bad, but I know I'm way too young to have one. I don't have a job, but my boyfriend does. It's not a very well-paying job, though. For this reason, I know having a baby wouldn't be the ...
A. 28 January 2007: Hey sweetness,
I am SO on the same page as you. I feel you, I really do. Right now, you are reading the thoughts of a girl who knows how you feel.
"Every time I'm a day or two late for my period I have mixed feelings about 'I'm pregnant? Y... (read in full...)
Do girls masturbate as much as us guys do?
Q. i am 15 year old boy and at school all the boys talk about them w**king all the time, but it seems that girls dont and never have done, is this true....
A. 28 January 2007: Absolutely, girls masturbate! I will say this though, I think that girls start masturbating (on average, of course) alot later than boys do. Why? Well, boys have it easy. It's not very complicated to masturbate if you're a guy. However, for a girl, ... (read in full...)
My lesbian fantasy has me greatly disturbed! How do I deal with it?
Q. I'm a 57 year old divorced woman, mother of three children. Something happened 2 days ago that took me by complete surprise and I am still numb over it. My ex husband is younger than I am (50) and left me 3 years ago. I am still depressed, and were ...
A. 28 January 2007: "Dear Penthouse..."
just kidding. I think that "Anonymous" gave you some pretty solid advice. It kind of seems like you are comforted by her presence in your pretty hectic life. Three kids? Recent divorce? That must be alot for you to handle. ... (read in full...)
I have a boyfriend but I'm thinking of meeting up with this guy online who promises to give me 'wild sex.' Is this a good idea, or not?
Q. Dear Cupid- Here is the problem: I've been dating my boyfriend for over a year, and I love him very much, but our sex life is a little boring. We usually have sex in the bedroom in the same position. I'm very sexual and I like to try new things in ...
A. 28 January 2007: Hey sweetess,
I wouldn't ever suggest that you don't love your boyfriend. It sounds like you geniunely do, but you're just lacking that excitement in the bedroom. I'll bet if he was really spicing things up in there you wouldn't be thinking... (read in full...)
She has a bf, but she likes me. What should I do?
Q. I long to be in a relationship with one of my female friends. (im male) There is a problem, she is in a relationship with a friend, have been for while. I'v been told she likes me, but she is off traveling soon for a year. what should i do?...
A. 28 January 2007: Leave. It. Be.
She's leaving soon ANYWAY. What all can you really do right now? Build a relationship? Well, that relationship is going to be off on a rough, rough start. Your friend will be angry with you AND her, there will be drama and will it ... (read in full...)
Why do I get so wet down there, when I am just around my bf?
Q. Hi guys I have a bit of a personal problem which I hope you can help me with. I've been with my boyfriend now for about four months and I absolutely love him to bits. However for the last month or so I seem to have a bit of a problem. Every ...
A. 28 January 2007: How wet are you getting? If it's just a few drops coming out of you - which is enough to spread around and feel wetter than it really is for guys, well - that seems normal to me. You like your boyfriend. He turns you on. Even if your brain isn't ... (read in full...)
When is the right time to arrange a second date with someone you like?
Q. i went on date with this girl i met once before. all went well. i really wanna see her again soon but when is the right time to phone or arrange date? also when is it right to tell her i love her? how do i know if she does? any signs to pick up?...
A. 28 January 2007: Hi there,
In my personal opinion, I think ANYtime is the right time to ask fo a second date. Well, okay... if you call her up at 4am Monday morning, breathing heavy and such... well, that's not the right time. But screw the "three day rule". I... (read in full...)
During sex, when a guy goes too deep it really hurts. Is this normal?
Q. Does anyone know what if this is normal or not? When i have sex its fine but if they push too hard or especially too deep inside me it really really hurts! i have recently had a full STI/STD screening and everything come back negative....so i dont ...
A. 23 January 2007: Oh my, yes that CAN hurt!!
You're very normal. I also get pain if my boyfriend goes in too deep. When it hits that certain spot, it gets a sudden OW!!
Is your boyfriend relatively big? Doggy style is probably the worst position for really large... (read in full...)
She has no pictures of my kids up in the house! Do I have reason to be upset by this?
Q. Hi, I have been dating a woman for 16 months and we just got into an argument over a bulletin board that she has in the kitchen. The bulletin board has every one of her friends and families kids pictures on it, but not mine! I feel hurt that the...
A. 23 January 2007: CD is right on (as always). I agree with her %100 percent. Listen to CD.
xxIndia... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants us to have sex and I need tips on how to make it good.
Q. hi, i know i'm a bit young but my boyfriend wants me to go back to his house on Friday so we can have sex. I love him but how will I know when i'm ready to.Also some tips on how to make it a good experience would be appriciated. Thank you...
A. 23 January 2007: Making it a good experience... well, wait until you're good and ready. Why plan these things out? My first time wasn't planned, it just happened and THAT is why it was so special. Take your dear, sweet time. You can only give it away once. Why do it ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend likes to wear my knickers and play with dildos and vaseline! What should I do?
Q. i am in a relationship and i recently discovered my boyfriend wearing my knickers with my dildo in one hand and the vaseline in the other. I thought he would deny it but he asked me to join in by wearing his boxers and helping him. What shall i do? ...
A. 23 January 2007: Well, hey - he asked you to join. That's nice of him.
Clearly, he's got a little fetish and he wants to include you in his fantasies. No, I don't think he's gay. I think he's a little kinky. If you're not into it, you need to tell him that you... (read in full...)
Have we been going out long enough to say I love you?
Q. hi I was wondering if anyone else has ever felt the way that i do at the moment I have a fab bf who I have been with for 7 months I see him quite a lot but when i leave him i ache for him again I saw him last night and ill see him tonight bu...
A. 22 January 2007: Oh, I think you're in the clear. I think you've been going out long enough. My boyfriend and I said it after three or four months! Now, a year n' a half later, we're still saying it to each other. Even if he doesn't say it back when you say it the ... (read in full...)
During sex I enjoy being urinated on. Am I strange?
Q. Hi, I'm a girl in my twenties and I get very aroused when a guy urinates on me. I've seen it in porn and find it quite arousing. My boyfriend and I have tried it once and I enjoyed it very much. Am I strange? Can anyone else relate to this? Is ...
A. 22 January 2007: If you dig it, you dig it. If your boyfriend digs it too, it's all good.
Whatever get's your motor running, sweetness.
xxIndia... (read in full...)
I feel she's too young to have as a gf - how do I handle this?
Q. 16 year old in love with me? I'm 26! Hi, I need help on one particular and delicate issue. I'm 26 years old. A girl of 16 seems to have fallen in love with me - These feelings are cannot be reciprocated since I am 26. An age gap...
A. 22 January 2007: You sound like a really nice guy. Clearly, this girl has good taste. I think that you're right about a lot of things... I think your life experiences at this point are just a little too uneven. You lead an active sex life, for one. She's ... (read in full...)
I like watching lesbian porn, does this mean I am bi sexual?
Q. i have a boyfriend but i like to watch lesbians kissing and naked girls and i find some of my friends and even girls i walk by very attractive...does this mean i am bisexual? please help me im a confused 14 year old girl! x...
A. 22 January 2007: Hey sweetness,
Yep. Could mean you're bisexual. Or it could just mean that watching naked women turns you on a little bit. I know lots of girls who don't have an interest in hooking up with girls, but get turned on watching girls get sexual. ... (read in full...)
Can you explain some sexual stuff to me..please?
Q. Hi, i feel really stupid and embarrassed asking these but could someone explain what a blow job, hand job, 69er...and anything else like that is? lol thankyou...
A. 22 January 2007: You know, I had to ask the same question right around your age.
India's Sex Dictionary
MANUAL SEX:
Masturbation: Giving manual stimulation to sexual organs for pleasure. (Touching your hoo-hah, maybe even giving yourself an orgasm. Guys touc... (read in full...)
Is it normal to touch yourself when having an orgasm?
Q. IS IT NORMAL TO TOUCH YOURSELF WHEN HAVING AN ORGASM?...
A. 21 January 2007: Very, very normal. If it helps you get there, if that's what it takes... go for it!! You're totally normal, tons of girls like being touched, especially when having an orgasm.
Enjoy!
xxIndia... (read in full...)
He stares at me and laughs at my jokes. How can I tell what he's thinking?
Q. How can you tell if someone fancy's u , theres a boy at school , he laughs at my jokes that arent funny, and try's hard to talk to me , sometimes he stares at me . how can i tell what he's thinking ? ? ...
A. 20 January 2007: Well, sweetness, you can't be a mind reader. (but don't we all wish we COULD be??)
I think this kid likes you... and you better snag him soon! Not everyone will laugh at your jokes even if they're not funny! He sounds like a sweetie. If he's try... (read in full...)
He's dating the girl he cheated on me with. I just ignore them and act happy--is this best thing to do?
Q. Well, lately I've been thinking about things. I recently split with my bf and things ended bitter. He cheated on me and what not and he's done things to me that I've always been quiet about and I never told him that it bothered me. I felt I was ...
A. 20 January 2007: Your friend is a fountain of wisdom. Listen to her and let him simmer in his own crap. ... (read in full...)
I don't trust my fiance, but we're getting married in February! Please help.
Q. I just cannot trust 'George'. I have been in a relationship with him for the past 2 years. We broke up once last July when he got engaged to another woman. We only split for a couple of months... and he called off his engagement with that girl ...
A. 20 January 2007: "Scared" and "confused" are not two things you build a marriage on. I think that maybe his feelings for you are valid, but I do think you need much more time to build trust again in your relationship before you make a lifelong commitment to each ... (read in full...)
He has hit, kicked, and punched me before, but i just let it slide because it's just so hard to get away from him! Any thoughts?
Q. Should i still be with my boy-friend because i think that he is just using me for the money and my sex just like what he did before..Sometimes he tells me that he loves, but how am i sure that he just wants to be with me for more money. He has hit, ...
A. 20 January 2007: I'm going to be honest. Are you asking this question just to get confirmation that dumping your deadbeat boyfriend is a good idea? Because you just listed like, 20 great reasons to dump him. Well, here it is. Yes. Dump him. No, you should not be ... (read in full...)
My bf cussed out the guy I have a crush on! What should I do?
Q. I have a problem with my boy-friend being to overprotective. He just cussed out the guy i have a crush on, in front of me!!..and he knows that i don't like that, but what can i do because now he's asking me to set the up to fight..and the only thing ...
A. 20 January 2007: Okay, your boyfriend is a little crazy. But honey, I think you're a little crazy for telling your BOYFRIEND about ANOTHER GUY that you have a CRUSH on. My God, if my boyfriend told me about some girl he had a thing for, I'd be pissed too. I'm not ... (read in full...)
Why can't I experience orgasms like the girls in porn? Any thoughts?
Q. I keep watching porn and seeing these girls come loads! I mean like waterfalls of come! Is this real or fake? Why can't I do it? Thanks...
A. 20 January 2007: You know, sweet thang, some girls are squirters. When you see waterfalls of liquid, well - that's probably just a setup. That's not natural. But yes, a handful girls do have lots of liquid come out.
I don't. None of my friends do. It's a random t... (read in full...)
I told her I didn't want to go out and she hung up on me! This gets to me..should I confront her?
Q. One of my friends asked me to go out the other day, and i said i didnt want to. And she put the phone down on me. I have seen her do this to a few of her other mates and then she starts talking behind their backs. Should i confront her. I think sh...
A. 20 January 2007: Your friend sounds sort of immature. What a bratty moment that was!! You could confront her about it, yes. I think "Max Steel" was right on when he said that if you do confront her, talk to a few of your friends and see if they feel the same way.
... (read in full...)
I planned to meet an online guy friend. Then he cancelled b/c I'm married! What happened?
Q. Having trouble getting over someone I never met!HELP? Yes, I am married! I met someone online 6 months ago. We talked about everything under the sun. WE became great friends. We looked forward to chatting w/each other daily. Even though I was marr...
A. 18 January 2007: Well, I think he did the right thing. He saw what was coming. He probably already felt an attraction to you and cut it off before anything even started. He did the right thing.
I know it sucks because you thought you'd be getting a friend o... (read in full...)
He's dating the girl he cheated on me with. I just ignore them and act happy--is this best thing to do?
Q. Well, lately I've been thinking about things. I recently split with my bf and things ended bitter. He cheated on me and what not and he's done things to me that I've always been quiet about and I never told him that it bothered me. I felt I was ...
A. 15 January 2007: You'll find that feeling again, I promise. It's a special feeling, and it feels wonderful, but it will come back with someone else and next time it might even feel stronger. You're doing really well so far, sweet thang. Just keep trcukin' and it ... (read in full...)
He's dating the girl he cheated on me with. I just ignore them and act happy--is this best thing to do?
Q. Well, lately I've been thinking about things. I recently split with my bf and things ended bitter. He cheated on me and what not and he's done things to me that I've always been quiet about and I never told him that it bothered me. I felt I was ...
A. 14 January 2007: Good girl. You are doing EXACTLY the right thing. There's no need for drama or anything like that... you be the bigger person and act happy. Ignore them. That is just fine. Good choice, doll!
xxIndia
P.S. What a jerk your boyfriend was to... (read in full...)
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