A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I have been dating a woman for 16 months and we just got into an argument over a bulletin board that she has in the kitchen. The bulletin board has every one of her friends and families kids pictures on it, but not mine! I feel hurt that the woman that says she wants to marry me doesn't have a picture of my kids in her house, but she has everyone else's there instead. She seems to get along with my kids just fine. On the other hand, I have had pictures of her kids in my house for about a year and also on my kids bulletin boards in their room.Do I have a reason to be upset that she has either ignored or forgotten my kids? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2007): I think if she has been with you for 16 months and has access to your kids pictures, it is not an oversight that she does not have the pictures anywhere in the house.
That said, I would have tried asking her in a non-threatening way why this was so and to listen to what she has to say...if she does not offer an explanation, then ask her if it is because she is not yet married to you, and she does not want to hurt her own kids feelings or confuse the situation at her home by putting up your kids pictures along with her own.....that is my guess, but I could be off base....maybe it is just her way of holding off from thinking of them as part of her family (friends included) until she is married and the two of you have combined your lives together...I don't think she did this with the intention of hurting you or the kids or because she does not like your kids, you would have a lot more concrete evidence of that if that were the case then the abscence of their pictures in her house.
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (23 January 2007):
 CD is right on (as always). I agree with her %100 percent. Listen to CD.
xxIndia
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A
female
reader, cd206  +, writes (23 January 2007):
 I don't think so. It's probably just an oversight on her part and even if she doesn't put pics up it doesn't mean she doesn't like your kids. If it bothers you find a nice pic of your kids and ask her if she'd like it for her board since you've noticed she doesn't have one.
CD
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