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... Send *asteofIndia a private message | | | *asteofIndia's profile:TasteofIndia here. I'm 33 years old, with my BA in Theater & Psychology. I suppose you could say that I have studied people and how to get into their heads. I've been here on Dear Cupid for well over a decade. I love Dear Abby, Ann Landers, all those advice giving goddesses... when I found this website how could I resist?? (Couldn't.) I love Dear Cupid, love being a moderator and love giving advice when I can!!
A lot of people ask if I'm from India... just to clear things up, I'm not. I'm not Indian, I just really liked that song by Aerosmith when I first made this account. I've never been to India. I'm not even an Aerosmith fan, really, but I really liked that song at the time.
I've been with my fella for 14 years, married for 10. We have two cool daughters and a pretty cool life that involves lots of adventure, art and laughter.
I adore: positivity, theater, llamas, fromage, sweatpants, earrings, and sitcoms. That just about sums it up... |
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Guys, how would you feel to be asked out??
Q. hi there..a question for all you guys??? how would you feel if a woman asked you out??? im 27 years old, met up with a guy , but not sure if he is interested...should i ask him out first? he seems shy though......
A. 22 February 2007: "If she was a real bow-wow"... oh my god, ponungalungb, you freakin' kill me. This terminology will now be added into my vast lexicon. Oh man...
xxIndia
P.S. I know you don't want a girl's opinion, but I say you go for it and ask him out!! Gi... (read in full...)
My arm feels like it's gonna fall off when I give him a hand-job...
Q. my boyfriend and i are always fooling around. but i can never seem to get him to cum when i am just giving him a handjob. if i am not doing anything he will grab my hand and go faster and he'll tell me to go faster but then my arm just gets tired. ...
A. 22 February 2007: This update made me so happy. Congratulations!!!
You made me smile. Hooray for you!
xxIndia... (read in full...)
He's 16, I'm 18. Is it okay to have a relationship with him even although he's my best friend's brother?
Q. I've liked this guy for a while now and I finally told my best friend about it. She thought it would be a good idea to get my crush and me some time together. So we went out and we came out to each other saying that we liked each other. We kissed, ...
A. 22 February 2007: Why the doubts?? Because he's not perfect to "other people"? Well, first off, that's a good thing... less competition... and second off, he seems perfect to YOU! If you've found heaven in someone's arms, stay in them. You're a lucky, lucky girl to ... (read in full...)
What do men prefer? Bushy, normal or shaven?
Q. I just wanted to know what guys prefer on womens private part, Bushy, normal or shaven? Girls answer 2 if ya like, thanks!...
A. 22 February 2007: Every guy has different tastes. Some love a chick with a nice, thick bush. And some love chicks who are rockin' the bare look. I think you can never, ever go wrong with a good ol' trimmed. Trim it closer in, and I thik it's all good. Then you can ... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and from a church going family. I like this guy who likes to party and smoke sometimes. Should I go for it?
Q. hey! im 14 years old and a freshmen but i think im pretty mature fir my age. not to sound conceited but theres a couple guys who would like a chance with me but i come from a strict, church going family. im falling for this very hot senior but has ...
A. 22 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
To be honest, I'd stay away from this guy. He might be a really nice guy and everything, but at such a young age, it's so easy to be swept up into bed scenes. And also, when you get older... if you're really into going to church a... (read in full...)
We broke up 5 months ago, am I stupid to wait on him?
Q. My boyfriend broke up with me at the end of this summer after 10 months, I didn't want to break up, but he said that he couldn't be in serious relationship at this point in his life (we are both 20), he still loves me and still wants me in his life ...
A. 22 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
Oooh, this guy is having his cake and eating it too. He's living the single life and he's got you to do "girlfriend" like things with him. When you say he "doesn't think of anyone but himself", you're dead on. Right now he's usi... (read in full...)
Do you think my daughter is really in love with this boy?
Q. Hello. My daughter is 17 and she has a boyfriend. I think they have been together for around 2 months now. I am really not sure how teenagers act when they are in love but I think she may be falling in love with this boy. She is always asking if...
A. 20 February 2007: Hi again,
I don't think there is a surefire way of knowing whether or not she's in love. Love isn't necessarily something you wear right on your sleeve. It can be very personal and very deep. If their relationship lasts for a long time, they bot... (read in full...)
My arm feels like it's gonna fall off when I give him a hand-job...
Q. my boyfriend and i are always fooling around. but i can never seem to get him to cum when i am just giving him a handjob. if i am not doing anything he will grab my hand and go faster and he'll tell me to go faster but then my arm just gets tired. ...
A. 20 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
I too, have this problem. I know how you feel. However, when I get super tired, my boyfriend takes over and does it himself for a little bit while my arm gets rest. Or, I don't know if you guys are doing the oral sex thing yet, but... (read in full...)
I'm 15 and my breasts feel a bit tender and bruised, is this normal?
Q. im 15 and I've noticed recently that my breast are feeling a bit tender almost like bruised at the sides near my arms.im not particularly big, a/b cup size. I no im definatly not pregnant or anything is this normal? ...
A. 20 February 2007: Totally, totally normal. My boobs get really tender sometimes when they feel like they're bruised. Just another wonderful side effect of PMS. Also, they might be growing a bit. You're young and still have a bunch of growing left to do. My boobs ... (read in full...)
Would you date a girl who told you she was forced to do oral sex even although she didn't want to?
Q. I have an open question for everyone, Would you date a girl who had told you that she was forced to do oral sex even although she didn`t want to have sex with the guy? How would you know if it was the truth she is telling or if she did it ...
A. 20 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
I don't think there is a way to know if she's telling the truth or if she did it willingly. However, I wouldn't take my chances, because if she is, it's probably a really hard memory for her. If she did do it willingly, does tha... (read in full...)
Do you think my daughter is really in love with this boy?
Q. Hello. My daughter is 17 and she has a boyfriend. I think they have been together for around 2 months now. I am really not sure how teenagers act when they are in love but I think she may be falling in love with this boy. She is always asking if...
A. 20 February 2007: Hey there,
How sweet! Sounds lik eyour daughter has found herself quite a catch. And it might be in the early stages of 'falling in love'. Right now it sounds like she really, really, really likes this guy and maybe after some more time, they mig... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is working abroad at the moment and I kind of resent it. Am I being selfish here?
Q. I'm a 20 year old student and I've been in a relationship for over a year and a half. I've been living with my girlfriend for 9 months. She has recently gone away for 5 months to work. I didn't want her to go. I understand why she wanted to work ...
A. 20 February 2007: Are you being selfish? Not really. I understand why you're feeling a little pissed and underappreciated and frustrated. You've gotta be getting lonely! But, I also urge you to support her while she's doing this. I don't think she's chosen work over ... (read in full...)
My fiance told me he had sex with a prostitute just before he met me. It really bothers me that he did this. Should I forget about it?
Q. My fiance told me he had sex twice with a prostitute just before he met me. This makes me sick to my stomach - but it was before we met. I believe he would not ever cheat on me but it still bothers me that he did this. Should I let it ruin our ...
A. 20 February 2007: "Should I let it ruin our chance for a happy future"
Read that again.
You'll have a happy future with this guy, you know it. And this little fact, you could LET IT ruin your chances together. Now, I do understand that this makes you sick. ... (read in full...)
Today, I threw up... is this a sign of pregnancy? Could I be pregnant?!!???$!
Q. My boyfriend and i were fooling around the other day and i made him cum, a few hours later we had protected sex (used a condom) it did NOT break and everything was fine, he didnt cum inside of me. Its now 4 days later and i just got my period this ...
A. 20 February 2007: If you just got your period this morning, then I'm thinking that you're just really feeling crappy.. sometimes I throw up if my period is that bad. The cramps and ugh!! I suppose because you were playing basketball, you might've just pushed your ... (read in full...)
My wife has just lost a very close family member in death and I don't know what to say to her? Help appreciated here.
Q. hi i need help on how to help my wife who is grieving over the loss of a very close family member. I know i shouldn't but i feel abit uncomfortable being around her at times when shes upset because i don't know what to do or say. I don't know how i ...
A. 19 February 2007: CD is right on. There's not much you really can say to help her right now. What you can do, however, is give her hugs and hold on real tight. When she wants to talk, just let her talk while you hold her and stroke her hair. You don't need to "fix" ... (read in full...)
How can I perform oral on my girlfriend without her being so damn ticklish?
Q. Every time I eat my girlfriend out, it tickles her. I want her to feel pleasure not a ticklish experience. Is there anything I can do to make her feel pleasure?...
A. 19 February 2007: I feel that pain. Oral sex can be totally ticklish. I find it's better if you're just a litte firmer with your actions. The lighter you work things, the more ticklish it gets. If you're firm and pretty solid, it doesn't tickle as bad.
Also,... (read in full...)
Are there any younger girls in the UK of the age of 20-22 who would have a relationship with an old man of 27?
Q. Dear Cupid. I am a 27 male who has never had any sexual relationships or girlfriends, probably due to a medical problem called hypogonadism. I am not getting any younger, and I am very depressed due to my situation. I am an undergraduate ma...
A. 19 February 2007: Whoa, man....
You don't need to be LYING about your age. There's no need to LIE. If you want to start a relationship based on a big, fat lie, your girlfriend will be much more upset than if you tell her the truth. Tons of girls like dating o... (read in full...)
He doesnt get an erection when we kiss, does he not fancy me!?
Q. hi. i have heard so many times that a lot of boys get erections while kissing and hugging there gf's. well im 16 and so is my bf. we have been together for roughly a month and a half and he has never had an erection when we have kissed and hugged! ...
A. 19 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
I think you have found yourself a gentleman. Isn't it nice that you can kiss and hug him and his mind doesn't jump RIGHT to sex and he's not crawling all over you trying to get a piece? I'll bet he just really likes kissin' and hugg... (read in full...)
How can I stop being scared of fat women and certain people in general?
Q. I am scared of certain type of people, like those who are imperfect in their physiqie, especially fat women. I think they have a low self-esteem and it's a safe thing to not let them come close. Same thing about people with dark skin. I find them to ...
A. 19 February 2007: I think that this is a question that not many people on this site will be qualified to answer. I think you really need to visit a therapist, and they can help you sort out your fear and ease you into acceptance. It seems like you've got some deep ... (read in full...)
He said he wished I wasn't his best friend's sister. What difference does it make?
Q. ok, there is this guy who is my brothers best mate i really him and he has a girlfriend and on saturday we ended up kissing and he sed he wished i wasnt his best mates sister and he said he doesnt love his girlfriend.what do i do?...
A. 19 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
First off, back off this guy and wait until he's single. There's no need for you to get tangled up in their drama and do you really want to be the 'other girl'?
He probably said he wished you weren't your brother's sister... (read in full...)
Together 7 years but all we do is fight and I'm ready to end it!
Q. i am 24 years old, and i am in an almost 7 year relationship with my 21 year old boyfriend. We fight everyday about everything. We dont have sex anymore, and we sleep opposite in bed and hen we do sleep in the same bed, we are comfortable with ...
A. 18 February 2007: Hi there,
It sounds to me like this relationship has been pretty dead for awhile. I think you've both checked out, clearly you don't even enjoy each other anymore! I think your boyfriend is not letting go of you (if he's making you feel like you... (read in full...)
Should I tell my bf I lied to him about liking other guys?
Q. I have a couple things to ask... ok well, I LOVE my boyfriend. We've been "going out" (not counting all of our break-ups) 2 years. everynight we talk on the phone and sometimes get into fights about me liking other people. I've lied to him about no...
A. 18 February 2007: Hey there, sweetness,
Do you actually want to DO anything with these other people? If you actually are actively pursuing them, then yes - that should be talked about with your boyfriend. However, if you just think these two guys are sort of cute ... (read in full...)
He's 16, I'm 18. Is it okay to have a relationship with him even although he's my best friend's brother?
Q. I've liked this guy for a while now and I finally told my best friend about it. She thought it would be a good idea to get my crush and me some time together. So we went out and we came out to each other saying that we liked each other. We kissed, ...
A. 18 February 2007: Hey there,
If your friend is alright with, I'd say go for it. If his sister is really one of your good, close friends, I think the good, close friend thing of you to do would be to ask her if she'd be super weirded out by it. Tell her that you... (read in full...)
Is she being emotionally abusive? I'm beginning to think I'm the problem, what do I do here?
Q. I'm 26 and have been dating my gf (20) for 4/5 months now, known her (off and on) for 2 years, first 2 months were great, but things nosedived and have been progressively getting worse the last 3 months. First off she tries to make all my plans an...
A. 17 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
You are NOT the problem, she is incredibly controllling at it seems to me that your emotions and mental health are taking a beating. This girl just isn't it for you. You need to be living your own life, and you need a girl who will... (read in full...)
I panic and freeze whenever my husband wants sex! What can I do?
Q. my husband and i split up last year for four months, i found the sexual part of the relationship difficult. we got back together, i thought it might be ok, i bleed each time we have intercourse and get pains, now my body goes into a panic at the ...
A. 17 February 2007: Hey there, sweetness.
If you're bleeding and experiencing pain every time you have intercourse, there is something going wrong with your body that you need to get checked out immediatly. There could be something seriously wrong, and the sooner y... (read in full...)
What could be some reasons that my boyfriend doesn't want to move in together?
Q. What could be some reasons that my boyfriend doesn't want to move in together? We have been fighting a lot and were trying to work things out and that is the reason he told me he doesn't want to move in together. It could be very true that its ju...
A. 17 February 2007: It sounds to me like he told you EXACTLY the reason why he doesn't want to move in together. Maybe after you fight, he needs space from you to get his head together. If you move in together, you won't have that space anymore.
I don't think he... (read in full...)
I think I 'nearly' had an orgasm but am not sure! Did I or didn't I?
Q. I was masterbating and I have never had one before but I think I NEARLY had an orgasm it felt like it was going to happen then i coudnt be botherd anymore it was too much effort did i nearly have one?... but i went weak at the knees after it . Was I ...
A. 17 February 2007: Maybe you were, maybe you were. It SOUNDS like you were on the brink. I couldn't tell you for sure because your body is your body. But, when you do eventually have one, it'll be very, very obvious. I think you'll know. Sounds like you were close, ... (read in full...)
We haven't kissed and it's been 4 months! How can I speed up the process?
Q. ok so me and my boyfriend have been going out for about 4 months but we still havent kissed yet is there a problem? can u give me hints on how to make it go faster?...
A. 17 February 2007: I agree with Dr. John, he does sound like a gentleman! What a catch, sweetness! I suggest that you go ahead and YOU make the first move. After so long, I wouldn't be surprised if he's scared out of his mind, nervous beyond belief! If he's in your ... (read in full...)
Why does my husband have to work all the time? I mean it's work work work all the time!
Q. i have a question. My husband he works all the time from 6:00p.m. to 6:00a.m. and my mother will have my kids into i find a job and get things going for my self and my kids and even on days he has off he might still have to go in. Now there would ...
A. 17 February 2007: I liked AskEve's advice about randomly dropping by. That's not too snoop like, you're not invading his privacy, you're just dropping by and saying hello. That's innocent.
There is such a thing as a 'workaholic' - I've dated them before. Totally ... (read in full...)
I fancy one of my STUDENTS... how can I stop my judgement getting cloudy?
Q. Hi there, i have a little problem regarding one of my students. i think he fancies me, and the problem is i like him too. And because of this, i think my judgement is getting cloudy. I am more leniant with him than the other students, and when he ...
A. 17 February 2007: Okay,
Do NOT tell him your feelings. If you are a teacher by profession, treat it as one. It's not a singles club, it's a place where CHILDREN and TEENAGERS come to you for guidance. Parents are trusting you with the education and well-bei... (read in full...)
We are both very shy but I know he likes me. Should I take the initiative here?
Q. Hello I have got a problem i really like this boy at my school, in fact i mite even love him but im not sure he feels the same way. this is what he does to make me think he mite feel the same way - he will smile at me for no reason , look at me and ...
A. 16 February 2007: Hooray!!
It sounds like this guy definitely DOES like you and that he is painfully shy and can't approach you. I think you should make the first move! He's probably been dreaming of that for awhile...
I think Kenny gave you good advice. Wri... (read in full...)
My boyfriend can't get an erection unless his penis is in contact with my genitals! Why is this?
Q. my boyfriend can't get an erection unless his penis is in contact with my genitals. Plus he often loses it halfway through sex or can't get it up altogether. No amount of foreplay or oral can get him back on track. He says "it's not you it just has ...
A. 16 February 2007: Hey there,
Kenny was right. He should just go ahead and check in with a doctor and see if there's a pill he can take or maybe if there's something wrong with him. I DON'T think he was lying to you, I don't think it's you. I know how hurtful ... (read in full...)
We're great friends, but his ex and him are very close. What's going on here?
Q. We love each other very much,we are great friends even.He lives 2 houses from his ex-girlfriend. They are very close friends. they are sometimes together at his house at night or in the street at night. he walks here home at night. she's free to ...
A. 16 February 2007: I agree with Kenny, I do think your boyfriend miught be overdoing it, however they do live awfully close together. I sort of understand how if they ended things on fairly good terms, they would still see each other.
If you can, could you maybe st... (read in full...)
My bf's friend tries to hook him up w/ other girls! They say they're joking, but my guy almost cheated on me last year! What can I do?
Q. I have a problem with one of my boyfriend's close friends, let's call him Jake. This guy Jake spoke crap (really bad stuff, like calling me a whore, a slut and stuff) when my bf n I just started going out. He said all this behind my back and was a ...
A. 16 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
If I were you, Jake would irk me as well. But, I don't think there's anything you can do to change him. This just seems to be his way of being a male friend. Talking about chicks and hooking up with them and offering to hook his... (read in full...)
It's hurting me that she is dating another guy...how do I deal with this?
Q. i've been lookin forward to meeting this girl i'm crazy about! she told me herself that she's goin out for a meal with someone. i know for sure it's a boy because she didn't tell me. we are goin cinema, day after. it's so hurtin she's datin another ...
A. 16 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
Keep that date for tomorrow. I think this girl is just trying to find someone that she enjoys spending time with. There's nothing wrong with dating a few people. Your relationship isn't exclusive yet. She's probably just testing ... (read in full...)
I'm losing interest in sex! Is there something wrong with me?
Q. I’m not bothered about wanting sex anymore is something wrong with me? I’m a guy who’s 24 years old and I’m really not bothered about wanting sex anymore. The truth is I’ve never actually had it, I’m still a virgin, I’m abstaining from sex till ma...
A. 16 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
Okay, I've got a few points to make...
A) "It seems the older I get and the less likely I'm going to find my true love..."
You're only 24 years old. this is still prime dating time! Once you turn 70 and you've still never f... (read in full...)
Is my penis normal?
Q. I am 12 and i asked a question a while a go about if it is normal for my penis to point up when i get an eriction but i guess i din'dnt state it clearly when i get an eriction it points up like if im sitting down it points up at the ceiling, is this ...
A. 15 February 2007: The diagram looked better in my little box, but it didn't turn out terribly. Anyhow. Yes. STRAIGHT towards the ceiling when you're sitting down. If it didn't do that, THAT would be weird. ... (read in full...)
Is my penis normal?
Q. I am 12 and i asked a question a while a go about if it is normal for my penis to point up when i get an eriction but i guess i din'dnt state it clearly when i get an eriction it points up like if im sitting down it points up at the ceiling, is this ...
A. 15 February 2007: I answered your last question, and I'm telling you the exact same thing here.
It SHOULD point up. When you're sitting down, it SHOULD point up at the ceiling. And when you stand up, it'll probably stand straight forward.
O
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If it is wrong to view women as sex objects then why is there things like pornography and prostitution?
Q. If it is wrong to view women as sex objects then why is there things like pornography and prostitution? It’s seems kind off contradictory doesn’t it? I mean how are people suppose to learn that viewing women as sex objects is wrong when things like ...
A. 15 February 2007: I loved Martini's take on pornography. I love it. It's true, not all porn is degrading to women. Yes, there's some that is. There's also some that's all about women bossing men around and treating them like objects. Some is just so we (the public) ... (read in full...)
Is it possible for a gay man to feel anything other than friendship with a straight female?
Q. Hi Everyone, I'm a straight female, 47, 3 adult children, single. I have experienced a lot where relationships are concerned but recently I find that I am falling in love with a gay man - we have everything but the sex. Its the most amazing ...
A. 15 February 2007: Probably not.
It's CONCEIVEABLE, the same way it is for you to have sexual feelings for a lesbian woman. It's possible, right? Never completely ruled out. But not really likely.
If you continue to love him in this way, you might end up rui... (read in full...)
Why doesn't my new husband ever want to have sex with me?
Q. My husband and I are young (22-24) and newly married (just over 1yr) and it seems like he doesn't want to have sex. No kids, We cuddle, lay in bed naked every night, go out on date nights, talk all the time, and do the massages often. I've even ...
A. 15 February 2007: Okay, honey. I don't think your husband is having sexual relations with your sister or your family. I'm not assuming he's out cheating on you (all though the possibility of cheating isn't ruled out).
I agree with 'Hannieseds' all the way. And... (read in full...)
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