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... Send *asteofIndia a private message | | | *asteofIndia's profile:TasteofIndia here. I'm 33 years old, with my BA in Theater & Psychology. I suppose you could say that I have studied people and how to get into their heads. I've been here on Dear Cupid for well over a decade. I love Dear Abby, Ann Landers, all those advice giving goddesses... when I found this website how could I resist?? (Couldn't.) I love Dear Cupid, love being a moderator and love giving advice when I can!!
A lot of people ask if I'm from India... just to clear things up, I'm not. I'm not Indian, I just really liked that song by Aerosmith when I first made this account. I've never been to India. I'm not even an Aerosmith fan, really, but I really liked that song at the time.
I've been with my fella for 14 years, married for 10. We have two cool daughters and a pretty cool life that involves lots of adventure, art and laughter.
I adore: positivity, theater, llamas, fromage, sweatpants, earrings, and sitcoms. That just about sums it up... |
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Why doesn't my new husband ever want to have sex with me?
Q. My husband and I are young (22-24) and newly married (just over 1yr) and it seems like he doesn't want to have sex. No kids, We cuddle, lay in bed naked every night, go out on date nights, talk all the time, and do the massages often. I've even ...
A. 15 February 2007: Okay, honey. I don't think your husband is having sexual relations with your sister or your family. I'm not assuming he's out cheating on you (all though the possibility of cheating isn't ruled out).
I agree with 'Hannieseds' all the way. And... (read in full...)
Does this mean that I have had a miscarriage ?
Q. I am 3-4 months pregnant. My boyfriend and I were having sex and I felt a sharp pain. When I went to the bathroom I was heavily bleeding.... I looked up the signs of having a miscarriage and I'm not getting cramps or vomitting. Did I have a ...
A. 15 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
I recently had a miscarriage and didn't experience severe cramps or anything. However, are you STILL bleeding? If the bleeding persists for more than a short period of time, then you need to call up your doctor. In fact, I'd call... (read in full...)
Been together a year and things about him are really started to bug me about him now!
Q. Okay, so I have been dating this guy for one year. I have known that I loved him for a long time and we have even kind of thought about marriage in the future, but for the past month we are fighting on and off and on and off. At first I thought it ...
A. 15 February 2007: Sometimes people lose interest. Sometimes relationships get old. Looks like this one is past it's prime. You're young and you don't have to commit to anyone - certainly not for the rest of your life! This is the time in your life to be dating, ... (read in full...)
what is the meaning of a single rose, compared to a dozen roses?
Q. what is the meaning of a single rose, compared to a dozen roses?...
A. 14 February 2007: To me, personally....
One rose says, "I'm simply in love with you."
a dozen say, "LOOK HOW MUCH I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU!"
Both are nice. Both are lovely. Both can mean just as much.
That's what I see!
xxIndia... (read in full...)
what should a married couple do for Valentine's day?
Q. What should a married couple do for Valentines Day? We have been married for 10 years and golly the roses and fancy dinner sound so cliché. We both work early tomorrow so we can’t stay up so late. I just am out of ideas. I bought him the ipod ...
A. 14 February 2007: Get some body oil that smells really, really super good (KY sells some good ones), some candles, etc. Give him his iPod with some of his favorite songs and songs that remind you of him. Then give him a massage and maybe even some more *wink wink*, ... (read in full...)
I put a camera in my sister's bedroom and watched her have sex with her boyfriend.
Q. Im obsessed with my sister. Im 16, she's 18. recently i started having dreams about having sex with my sister, so i thought if i could see her naked I could fullfil this fantasy and it would stop. So i secretly put a camera in her bedroom and reco...
A. 14 February 2007: Is this normal?
Whoa, whoa, NO.
First off, you are SO invading her privacy and you have a super (creepy) obsession with her. Even if you WEREN'T her brother, you would still be crossing SO MANY boundaries. You need to seek help. You need t... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if I want to meet with him again, he can be weird.
Q. hi i met a guy i had been talkin to on msn for over year, today he was quite annoying im not sure whether it was cuz he was nervous or wat but he just seemed reali weird and plus he looked alot more good lookin on web cam than in real life we r sort ...
A. 14 February 2007: Hey there,
I think that it's possible that he was just horribly nervous. I'd give the kid another chance. The first date can be tricky and he's probably sitting home right now saying, "oh God, I blew it.". I'd give him another chance.... there wa... (read in full...)
Does anyone know the best time to get pregnant?
Q. Dose anyone know the best time to get pregnant? I heard several things: Right after your period and a week after your period. When does ovulation really supposed to start? Are there any foods that I should eat to assist in conceiving? And is it t...
A. 14 February 2007: You know, this site is a decent place to ask those questions, but going to your doctor can be even better. Your doctor knows you, your body and can answer your questions face-to-face. Not everyone on here is a doctor and might give you false ... (read in full...)
Is there such a thing as a "f*** buddy?"
Q. Is there such a thing as a "f*** buddy?" I know this girl for a long time, since school, we're both 19 now. Everytime though she always seems to break up with her bf's, this is where it gets complicated. She always looks for comfort from me, ...
A. 14 February 2007: Well, for starters, you can stop having sex with her. You have some self-control and if you're engaged to be married, well you REALLY have to use that self-control. You just need to tell your little friend that you are getting married, you (in ... (read in full...)
How can i tell if the sperm has reached the egg yet?
Q. me and my boyfriend had sex last night. all of a sudden he stopped and said he nutted inside of me. i asked him again and he said yeah he did but it was a little. then he said you shouldnt be pregnant. when i laid down i felt it starting to come ...
A. 14 February 2007: It's totally possible that you're pregnant. Once some get's in there, it's in there. How you'll know your pregnant is another story, you'll just need to wait until that time of the month comes around.
If you don't want to be pregnant, there is... (read in full...)
What's the average number of sexual partners for a 17 year old in the UK?
Q. im 17 and only slept with 1 person, all my mates have slept with about 5 by now lol whats the avergae for a 17 year old in the UK?...
A. 14 February 2007: I don't know the average, but there's no number that you OUGHT to be at, and there's no need to count how many you've slept with. I think it's great that you haven't wasted your time sleeping around and that you've only been with one person.
I kno... (read in full...)
We have a 6 monthold child-so am I wrong to ask for another baby?
Q. me and my husband have been together for a while and he has a child from a previous marrage and one from me he is 6 months old and i want another one i want them close together i only want tos o why not get it all and over with but he does not want ...
A. 14 February 2007: Does another baby make that much of a difference? Well, yes. More money, more time, more effort. Another life long commitment to a human being. He's already got two kids, I'm not surprised that he's not jumping up and down for another one.
I do ... (read in full...)
In a fit of anger I slapped him! I regret it so much and I apologised but now he is distant. How can I put things right again?
Q. I am in a complicated situation at present. Two years ago I had a beautiful baby boy. The situation with my little boy's biological father hasn't been good, nor was the ending of our relationship while I was pregnant(he cheated). I started dating ...
A. 14 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
I've slapped two guys. One, because we were both actors, thrived on drama - he would do something bad (i.e. cheating), I would to something in retaliation (I slugged him), and finally it ended (he decked me in the face. In the midd... (read in full...)
I am 12 and I need to know...when should I kiss my gf?
Q. Im am 12 and i have a girlfreind but we have never kissed iv have kissed before but i dont think she has and every time i look at her i want to kiss her but im not sure if she wants to when should i kiss her ...
A. 13 February 2007: When should you kiss her?
When it feels right.
You'll know... yes, you'll know. Don't plan these things out - because that makes them awkward and mechanical. When it's ready to happy, it'll be ready to happen. Whether that's tomorrow or in a... (read in full...)
Is it normal for an erection to point "up"?
Q. Im 12 and I know all about sex, but i dont no if it is normal for my penis to go point up when i get an erection is this normal? ...
A. 13 February 2007: Yes it is. It should be pointing up. If you stand up, it'll probably sit straight forward! That's very, very normal, sweetness. You're perfectly alright.
xxIndia... (read in full...)
Out relationship feels like it's getting old... where from here?
Q. My boyfriend and i have been dating for a year and 2 months. but now i just feel that i don't love him anymore and its just getting old. he gets really upsetwhen i tell him this but i don't know what to do he doesnt drive yet and it just seems our ...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey there,
It seems to me that you've already check out of this relationship. It sounds like it's getting old and boring to you (which you said). You probably don't want to spend the rest of your life with this guy, even if he is nice. So why wast... (read in full...)
I need to know the answer to an age old question--Does size really matter??
Q. Does size matter? Im 17 years old and never had a girlfriend because everytime sombody asks me out im to shy about showing my penis if we ever got around to having sex, this is also the reason why i am too worried to ask anyone out. My penis...
A. 13 February 2007: Ahhh!!! I'm so happy for you! Than you for the update, it put a smile on my face. I'm so happy for you! Enjoy the relationship as it grows and progesses! Have fun, sweetness. What good timing, too! Right before Valentine's Day. Awwww.
Happi... (read in full...)
I'm having erotic dreams about my girlfriends teenage sister!!
Q. For that past few months, I've had a few erotic dreams about my girlfriend's younger sister. My girlfriend is 21 and her sister is 19. We chat alot online and I sometimes go crash at her place out of town when we go skiing together. I just wa...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
Outside of your dreams, do you actually FEEL anything for her sister? Or does she not interest you at all? I have erotic dreams all the time, and some of the weird reoccuring dreams involve Drew Carey and Alex Trebek. AHHH! Especial... (read in full...)
What are my honourable options??
Q. OK, here is my problem. I need help. I was married at 18 to my high school sweetheart. She has had many serious emotional problems. She had an affair on me (with a 53 year old, and they lived in OUR house while I was gone) when we were first ...
A. 13 February 2007: "Feed the dog, offer it toys and attention while wearing gloves...make sure it has a fluffy blanket....then the second the last pup is weened, let it do what rabid dogs do....and once it wanders off....lock that door and buy a really big Cat."
... (read in full...)
My partner wants to give me a ring on Valentine's Day, now I'm not so sure!
Q. Hello. :) Im in a situation where i dont know what i should say or how to approach the situation.I have been in a relationship now for around 18 months everything has been great and the relationship has been fun, Tomorrow is valentines day a...
A. 13 February 2007: Hi there,
I see these rings that you're getting for each other as a symbol of change and a new chapter of your lives together. Why don't you try that on for size? With them, you can make little promises to each other - like that you'll go out and ... (read in full...)
This is a bit unusual I know, tomorrow is V's day. (I'm the female) but I want to stay in and watch the FA cup replay!!! How do I tell my boyfriend?
Q. Hi everyone, I am in a bit of a pickle here! My partner and I have arranged to go out tomorrow night (we try and go out for a meal at least once or twice a week) - now, unless you live in a cave, you will realise that tomorrow is Valenti...
A. 13 February 2007: Oh My God, I want your boyfriend. KFC, popcorn, beer, HDTV and football. Oh wait, that's soccer over there. Whatever. I love your boyfriend. Please, send him to the US at once and give him my name. I live in Portland, OR.
Tell him to bring me... (read in full...)
I'm 3 weeks late with my period, should I take the big "P" test?
Q. hey am 16 years old and am late for my period by about 3 weeks, i started a new pill and it says that i shouldn't be expected to have a normal period until after the first packet, however i started the packet 2 days after i was already late and am ...
A. 13 February 2007: When you start a new pill, it does screw up your cycle. So you might not be pregnant, your body just might be adjusting to the hormones. But, you never know.
My two favorite aunts (Dragonette and CD) gave you good advice. Take the test just to ... (read in full...)
I have had romantic feelings for both genders...How do I know if I'm bisexual?
Q. I need help with something, it's been bugging me for a while. How do I know if I'm bisexual? I've never had a girlfriend and I've never had a boyfriend but I have had romantic feelings for both at one point. How do I know? and what do I do?!?!...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
Everyone else had told you you're normal. You know why? Because you ARE! It's alright to be curious about everybody, and if it ends up you are bisexual - hey! That's awesome! You get twice as many people to choose from! Best of ... (read in full...)
Is my curved penis a result of masturbation?
Q. As any normal teenager will do, i masterbate at least once a day sometimes more. within the last 12 months i have noticed that my penis has begun to curve towards me. should this happen or is it an effect from masterbating? ...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey there,
I'll have to see what others say on this one, but I do know that's it's perfectly normal to have a curve in your penis. Some guys have penis that are sticking out at all angles! Some curve downwards. Penises come in all shapes and size... (read in full...)
He's promised me he'll never see his ex again because he loves me but I'm seeing MY ex behind his back
Q. I have taken back my boyfriend that cheated on me. Big mistake??? My b/f's relationship with his ex, was about 5 weeks long.I was good friends with his ex, until they split and we started a relationship.We have been going out for 2 1/2 yrs.Me a...
A. 13 February 2007: If you want to give "starting fresh" a try, then do it. Your boyfriend does seem pretty sorry for what he's done and I think it's possible that he really won't do it again. And you probably need to cut this 'ex-crush' out of your life. Or, if you do ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is curently married and my gut feeling thinks that they are still seeing each other. Should I be concernd?
Q. hi cupid, my question is: my boyfriend is currently married and my gut feeling thinks that there still seeing each other, should i be concernd? When ever i bring up her name he gets all defensive and yells then he leaves, when he comes home work ...
A. 13 February 2007: I'm confused.
If you clarify this question, I will answer it, I swear.
Is your boyfriend married to someone else? Other than you?
If he's married, why WOULDN'T he see her?
I'm confused.... (read in full...)
This guy I saw makes my heart race! Should I make the first move?
Q. Hi, im a 27 year old female, n i need some help here. I saw this guy in town last year, lets just say he made me stop in my tracks. i was involved in 5 year long distance relationship (a really bad one) but i managed to get out of it. anyway, there ...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey there,
I liked Lisa's advice. I don't think you necessarily need to be so forward. If you want, you could simply say, "hey - haven't I seen you before? You look really familiar." - and that could start a conversation right there.
I think... (read in full...)
Why can't I leave my husband? What is this hold he has over me?
Q. my husband and i have been through so many things and as a result we held on tight even when we probably shouldn't have. Now our marriage is barely hanging on. he is constantly angry, goes out almost every friday and often a night or two during the ...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey there,
Are you afriad to be alone? That maybe you won't find someone else? Or that he might change, or that you might decide think it's a big mistake once you leave him?
Those seem like normal fears, but you need to believe that lea... (read in full...)
What can I do to get to know her better? I've never even spoken to her before!
Q. Chances of getting someone you barely know (only seen a couple of times) into a personal relationship? Hi, I guess I'm just at the point in high school where I guess I started to seriously think about my future life...and ya, I would like to ge...
A. 13 February 2007: I think maybe you should talk to her when her friends aren't around first. If you go up to her while with her group of friends or sit with them and try to intergrate... well, it could be a little weird. One-on-one I think is your best bet. Maybe sit ... (read in full...)
I just gave my bf my first blowjob and it was horrible! Now he wants me to do it again-what should I do?
Q. I just had oral sex for the 1st time it was horrid and my boyfriend wants me to do it again...should i or not..im scerd if i say no he will dump me...but im in love with him and i dont want to lose him over not sucking his dick..what should i ...
A. 13 February 2007: It was horrid for YOU? As in, you didn't like it? I'm not being a jerk, I just wasn't very sure if it was horrid for you or you thought he didn't like it.
If you think by saying "no" he'll dump you, well, he's not a very nice guy. And I don't th... (read in full...)
Do you think he's checked his email yet or has he freaked out that I asked him to the prom?
Q. Ok, in my last question, I asked about a guy from camp. The problem with this situation is that the only contact I have with him now is over the email. I actually invited him to prom a few weeks ago over the email, cleverly(or so I thought) phrasing ...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey there,
Do you have his phone number? I'd just call him up and ask him about it. Just say, "I need to get tickets, so I needed to know sooner than later if you can go. If you can't, no problem, I just need to know so I can ask someone else!"..... (read in full...)
How do I tell my Mom, I am in my first relationship? Any tips?
Q. how do i tell my mom that i am in my first relationship?...
A. 13 February 2007: Make a hot date for you and your mother. Go out to the movies and dinner (it's always nice to spend some nice time with your Mom anyways). Then, over dinner tell her that you're seeing someone and it's getting serious.
Be excited about it! If y... (read in full...)
I need to know the answer to an age old question--Does size really matter??
Q. Does size matter? Im 17 years old and never had a girlfriend because everytime sombody asks me out im to shy about showing my penis if we ever got around to having sex, this is also the reason why i am too worried to ask anyone out. My penis...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
Well, your penis sounds just fine. It's a fine size, totally acceptable and normal. But I think you're reeeaaallly concerned about sex. Sex is just a part of a relationship, it's not the whole thing. If you get a girlfrie... (read in full...)
We love each other but are stuck in a rut. Advice badly needed!
Q. My fiancee and I have been engaged for over a year and dating for four. We recently moved back to her home city. She started feeling differently about me over the past few months. We lived in a shitty home in my home town of 5,000 people. She didnt ...
A. 13 February 2007: I'm very sad for you, sweetness.
It sounds like to me, your fiancé felt trapped in the little town you lived in together, so she clung to you (since she didn't really fit in with anyone else) and settled. She wanted kids so she would have someone ... (read in full...)
Here is my list of the "perfect" boyfriend! What do you think?
Q. Here is my list of the perfect boyfriend. Are there any men like this? 1. Shares all email and IM passwords 2. Has none, or only one, female friend 3. Tell's me when his only female friend calls 4. Tell's me when he goes basically anywher...
A. 13 February 2007: Oops. Typo. When I said:
"EVERYBODY, man OR woman should hand themselves over to someone so completely."
I meant: EVERYBODY(I guess "Anybody" would be more fitting here), man OR woman shouldN'T hand themselves over to someone so completely. ... (read in full...)
Here is my list of the "perfect" boyfriend! What do you think?
Q. Here is my list of the perfect boyfriend. Are there any men like this? 1. Shares all email and IM passwords 2. Has none, or only one, female friend 3. Tell's me when his only female friend calls 4. Tell's me when he goes basically anywher...
A. 13 February 2007: Crazy.
If some guy asked me to be this way for him, I'd sooner die. I don't care if the guy is Johnny Depp. Can't go anywhere without you? FAMILY TIME doesn't interefere with YOUR time? You'd be really lucky to have a guy who cares deeply about hi... (read in full...)
I just lost my virginity...and the sex was awful!! Will it get better?
Q. i just lost my virginity, is it normal for it to do nothing for you? i didnt enjoy it at all! and im not thinking wil i ever enjoy sex!?...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
The first time you ever have sex will probably not be the best sex of your life. You've never done it before with each other, and it can be a little weird. Once you get more comfortable with each other it will get better. CD had g... (read in full...)
Should I leave it and wait for him to contact me?
Q. Hyah I wrote earlier this month asking for advice about sleeping with my ex. I did what I am sure is the right thing and told him that I couldn't as I still had feelings for him. He said that he understood and that if I ever felt down he would come ...
A. 12 February 2007: Are you trying to get over this guy? If you are, you need to stop the text messaging and all contact for awhile. And by "awhile" I mean a couple of months. Once you are completely, COMPLETELY over him, then maybe you can talk again sometimes. But ... (read in full...)
Kissed my friend and now she's 'off' with me!!
Q. My best friend is a girl and ive liked her for sometime now she knows this to. She said that we couldnt get together before because of our friendship - she don't want to lose a friend but,over the weekend we kissed a number of times and one kiss ...
A. 12 February 2007: Well, she probably feels a little weird with you!
I agree with Kenny, you do need to talk to her and ask her what's going on. I'd wait until you have some private time together to do it. I think she's probably feeling sort of awkward around y... (read in full...)
Is my husband gay or bi???
Q. I have been married for 5 years on my second marriage i love him dearly sex was fantasic before i got pregant with my daughter now 2. He never seems to want sex or if we do its a quick wam ban,which frustrates me as im highly sexual,i purchase...
A. 12 February 2007: Well, it's possible. It's possible he might be....
But, also he might just be kinky. Tons of guys like ass play - some won't admit it, because people will assume they're gay. But, lots of guys are into that.
How is he with YOU, aside from ... (read in full...)
Is it normal that fantasies fulfill me and not actually having intercourse?
Q. I have read somewhere that our subconscious mind understands only images. So does it mean if we can visualize about having an intercourse with someone so that almost similar images are created in subconscious, it is almost equal to a real one? I ...
A. 12 February 2007: Well... are you happy with your current situation? If you're happy, then I think you're perfectly fine. If you've got a girlfriend and she's being neglected due to you not needing sex, well - that could cause problems. But, if there's no one in your ... (read in full...)
What can I do to get to know her better? I've never even spoken to her before!
Q. Chances of getting someone you barely know (only seen a couple of times) into a personal relationship? Hi, I guess I'm just at the point in high school where I guess I started to seriously think about my future life...and ya, I would like to ge...
A. 12 February 2007: Hey sweetness,
All right, well - if you don't talk to her, I'll bet she'll think you're a whole lot creepier than if you do! If you don't talk to her, you'll just be that "kid who stares"... but if you talk to her, she'll know that you're a good g... (read in full...)
What can I do to get to know her better? I've never even spoken to her before!
Q. Chances of getting someone you barely know (only seen a couple of times) into a personal relationship? Hi, I guess I'm just at the point in high school where I guess I started to seriously think about my future life...and ya, I would like to ge...
A. 10 February 2007: Well honey, two things.
First off, you don't need to find someone "before it's too late" so young. Goodness, high school is the time to be dating people and figuring out what you want in a future, permanent partner. Tons of people don't find the... (read in full...)
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