A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:After I graduated high school, I left all of my friends and family and moved 1000 miles away for school. While here, I met a great man and we've discussed getting married when we graduate next year. Everything between us is perfect, except that I don't want to live here after I graduate. He has lived here his whole life and doesn't want to leave his family-while I want to be closer to my family now as well.We have talked about moving in between...but that would still be really far from both of our families and we fear that both of us would eventually become miserable. I do not know what to do, if I stay, I would only see my family once a year and live in a place that I do not like, but if I leave, I lose a man that I love very much. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (10 November 2008):
 Hello, my dear...
My heart breaks for you. I am in the same situation and it SUCKS. Seriously, girlfriend, I completely feel you. I'm on the West Coast of the States right now, wishing I was on the East with my family and friends. I've been here on the West Coast for three years and haven't made any lasting friendships... I am so sad, missing my family, wishing I was with them...
But I, like you, really love my boyfriend and have plans for marriage. It's hard trying to choose between two such important things - family & love.
I had to think about what was really, ultimately important. For me, that's having a family. I told my man that I'll stay out here until we start having babies and then I've got to be close to my family. No compromise. He accepted this, and we're staying where he wants to stay until we start making babies, then we can go to where I want to be.
So, what I'm saying is that you need to really figure out what is ultimately important in your life and if you and your fella can find an arrangement that suits you both in the long run. Location can be so difficult, but as long as you both are prioritizing each others happiness, you should be able to find a happy plan.
I hope that you find a satisfying ending to your story, my dear!!
xx India
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (10 November 2008):
Well how important to him is being near his family?
Would he even consider moving to your end of the world for a few years and give it a try?
This has to be your choice. But I think if you have gone to Uni and are desperate to move home then you will not be happy away from home long term.
Some people leave home and then never want to go back. Some people leave and realise home is the only place they'll be happy.
Good Luck!! xx
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