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... Send *oubleM a private message | | | *oubleM's profile:DoubleM currently resides in Fort Worth Texas, but has lived in southern California (Hollywood), Hawaii, Europe and North Africa as well as Texas. Attended the University of Texas. Now single (possibly forever) after three marriages, one of 20 years. Mainly tries to help with sexual issues. Views and opinions are very permissive and suggestions are often brief and to the point. |
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Gf told me I'm not the best sex she's had, what should I do?
Q. hey ppl out there ive been in a relationship for a year and some months and i used to ask my gf if i was the best at sex she used to tell me yes and i was the first person to make her to cum alot and when having sex now i ask her again recently who ...
A. 26 July 2008: First of all, you seem to be "hung up" on being the "best." That is a trap, but if you really want to be a very good lover, you should consider learning everything possible about "cunnilingus." Search "cunningus" on this Web site and read my ... (read in full...)
Do women 'cum' like men?
Q. Do women cum? I know that men do alot but i'm confused.I know that women get moist down there I have made out with guys and my underware gets wet is that a female version on cum? I have never had sex so sorry is I sound like a retard. Thanxs for ...
A. 26 July 2008: With all due respect to "Yos" who has provided many quality advisories past, some women actually do ejaculate a small amount of seminal type fluid during orgasm. Note that I said "some" and "small amount." It is not well understood medically ... (read in full...)
How can I get more pleasure from mastermation as I have a useless boyfriend?
Q. Whenever I want sex or pleasure, my bf doesnt want to. and Usually tells me [take care of it yourself] Firstly, if I wanted to take care of it myself, I wouldnt need to be with him. and Secondly, taking care of it myself, is NOTHING like whe...
A. 26 July 2008: In my opinion, your boyfriend is not much of a man if he has no interest or ability to sexually please his woman. The vibrator suggestions are reasonable, but to me sound like a sad solution to remedy lack of loving attention from your partner. One ... (read in full...)
Should I have my facial birthmark removed or could I learn to live with it?
Q. i have a problem with my self image i have a birthmark on my face and it does get me down sometimes when people will stare. i have the choice to get it removed by laser which i would want to do but at the same time i dont want to turn my back on ...
A. 26 July 2008: Everyone, well at least most everyone, has something about their appearance that they feel is lacking. For instance, I'm rather short for a man at about 5 foot, 6 inches. But there is practically nothing that I can do about that. I've never worn ... (read in full...)
Do women 'cum' like men?
Q. Do women cum? I know that men do alot but i'm confused.I know that women get moist down there I have made out with guys and my underware gets wet is that a female version on cum? I have never had sex so sorry is I sound like a retard. Thanxs for ...
A. 25 July 2008: Yes, many women actually release a seminal fluid during orgasm, but the moisture you are talking about is natural lubricant that occurs during stimulation. The lubrication begins rapidly during stimulation as the vagina widens. The vaginal walls ... (read in full...)
I am easily aroused, is this normal?
Q. I get aroused rather quickly I dont know if this is normal or not but whenever i start to make out with a girl i start to get aroused, and even if we are cuddling up and she has her arm under my shirt rubbing my stomach i get aroused. DO g...
A. 25 July 2008: Normal.... (read in full...)
Does a woman's clitoris move during orgasm?
Q. Does a woman's clitoris move at all when she's having a clitoral orgasm? I noticed that today mine moved like it was opening and closing when I was getting off. I have never noticed that before. Is that normal?...
A. 24 July 2008: As somewhat indicated by "LazyGuy," a healthy woman's clitoris frequently (and more or less) plays a game of hide and seek during arousal, although it varies greatly in size and shape from woman to woman. More accurately, when highly aroused, a ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend fellated a guy! How do we have a healthy relationship again?
Q. My boyfriend and I went on a weekend away with another couple that have been friends with us for years. In a drunken spell, my boyfriend and the other guy decided to experiment and gave each other blow jobs (without us girls knowing this). Later the ...
A. 20 July 2008: In my opinion, your boyfriend may not be quite all man, dear. I just think that a true heterosexual is entirely straight about sexual contact and, then there are variations such as bi-sexual. But that's another category. I dislike most "labels" too, ... (read in full...)
I told him I want to have sex with him, so isn't the ball in his court now??
Q. I told this guy at work 5 weeks ago that I want to have sex with him. He seemed very receptive at that time, but nothing's happened yet! I went away on vacation for 3 weeks and just returned to work last week. I've been ignoring and avoiding him, ...
A. 20 July 2008: Of course the next move is his. I might suggest to all that there are more subtle ways to tell a potential partner of any gender that you are interested but, in any case, the next move is theirs once the signal has been sent, even if just a wink.... (read in full...)
Why are women expected to degrade themselves for men's pleasure, but not vice versa?
Q. I do not understand why it is almost expected of women to degrade themselves to please men when men won't do the same for us. Men's minds are so poisoned by the porn industry that they think it is NORMAL for women to take it in the ass and so on. I ...
A. 18 July 2008: Certainly you have every right to be pissed-off about your chosen boyfriends and somewhat disappointed in your ability to choose whom are best in your life. ... (read in full...)
Sex it over in minutes! How can I delay his excitement?
Q. My Bf always gets too excited during foreplay that the sex is over within minutes and tips on how i pospone his excitement so we can 'go' for longer?...
A. 16 July 2008: At your age, you are unlikely to encounter many (if any) males near your maturity level who will provide quality and prolonged sexual activity. One possibility is to go ahead and let your lover climax right away, then if he is willing and able, a ... (read in full...)
Is no strings attached sex with an ex a good or bad idea?
Q. For once, a quick one by me. Is no strings attached sex, with an ex girlfriend (from long long ago) a good or a bad idea? I mean, there is a history that is all behind us now, and she is my ex for a reason, but it's 5 years on, and we're diffe...
A. 16 July 2008: Good question, and my only possible suggestion is just a personal opinion. Such issues as these are entirely individual decisions, but if it was my option, I would likely jump all over the opportunity if it would be exciting and pleasurable. You ... (read in full...)
How do I please a man in bed?
Q. How do I please a man? How and where do they like to be touched? I know this varies man by man but suggestions would be helpful. I have asked my man and all he says is "just try something"....
A. 15 July 2008: In my opinion, "natasia' nailed the answer. But "eyeswideopen" and "cupidguy" added some interesting thoughts here. I particularly enjoyed the query, "Where have you been the past 41-50 years?" by "eyeswideopen." All you have to do with a man is g... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is now willing to have anal sex, now I need some advice, please.
Q. Hello All, Well i am 27 and hve a gf. I want to do anal sex and i am kind of crazy for that. I like to see movie with anal sex, also i discuss the same with my gf. First she was not ready but now she said YES over the phone. Whenever we met she ...
A. 15 July 2008: The following is only my opinion.
Anal sex is unnatural because the asshole is simply not designed for penetrative sexual purposes and, if practiced for long, very detrimental to the recipient's well-being. My personal knowledge of the cons... (read in full...)
I didn't reach to climaxing in my relationships, does my problem have anything to do with the way I masturbate?
Q. When i masturbate, i do it face down, rubbing my clitoris in a pillow, floor or bed and my orgasms are amazing. I've tried to masturbate the regular way, just by sitting or laying down on a bed face up, and rub my clitoris with my fingers or ...
A. 11 July 2008: All the previous advisors below have offered excellent thoughts. I'm impressed, and you should be comforted with the knowledge that you will experience great sex in your life - providing you associate with caring and sexually attentive men. It will ... (read in full...)
I want to please him, but I have NO idea what to do!
Q. im 20 and my boyfriend is 19. its embarrassing but i never thought i'd find someone to be close to and i love him deeply. i never thought about sex because i thought no-one would ever like me and now that i'm with my boyfriend i've realized it ...
A. 11 July 2008: Let your boyfriend take the lead. In my opinion, you are very young to be saying that you "don't like sex" - which can and should be one of the greatest gifts of life - but yours may be a good attitude at this point. You are of legal age, however, ... (read in full...)
How can I overcome my nerves?
Q. im going on a date with my girlfriend this saturday and i really need help! im thinkng of kissing her . jus like a small kiss to show her that i love her but i am practically famous for my nerves and i need advice on what to do! someone plase ...
A. 11 July 2008: I'm a much older and experienced man, but my best advice is simply to give her a hug as soon as you meet for the date - not a kiss yet - just a brief, friendly hug. Everyone loves a hug, and it is not overly forward of you. You MUST do this ... (read in full...)
Do guys like dry humping?
Q. Hi i was jst wondering-- is dry humping pleasurable for guys, b/c ive heard it can sometimes cause chafing? what are 'blue balls?'...
A. 8 July 2008: I suspect that "blue balls" is equivalent to what was often called "stone aches" in earlier times - which for a guy, means that he gets very sexually aroused but does not ejaculate. I don't know the physiology of why it occurs, but having ... (read in full...)
Is there any chance of getting pregnant on your period?
Q. Hello, I have been wondering lately, if there would be any possiblity of geting pregnant on your period. Because last weekend my boyfriend came inside me. But he told me not to worry because i cant get pregnant on my period. He said theres like a o...
A. 3 July 2008: Very unlikely, but an extremely slim possibility. The uterus is simply not in the right cycle for inception during that period of the month for most any woman. ... (read in full...)
He says he's not interested in sex, but he masturbates all the time!
Q. Hi,Im back with my ex boyfriend a 4months now,we used to have great sex before but this time hes not interested in sex,he masturbates at least twice a day.he says the problem isnt me but if not what is?? he drinks most nights but that was never a ...
A. 2 July 2008: As usual I have to agree with "Ask oldersister" but, as a man, would suggest that your boyfriend not only has "psychological issues" but unless resolved soon, is no reliable long term mate material. Could possibly be wrong about it, but you would be ... (read in full...)
Should I feel used? Do you think there is any hope that we'll get back together?
Q. my g/f broke up with me about 2 weeks ago and i'm still depressed. she was my first g/f and i'm 18 and she's 17. i thought everything was going great but i had noticed somethings but ignored them, thinking i was paronoid. after visiting her for a fe...
A. 30 June 2008: The truth. in my opinion, is that lovers absolutely use each other - and somewhat selfishly enjoy each other, but it should always be in a willing give-and-take situation. It's a matter of willingly satisfying each oner.
The factor that makes it a... (read in full...)
I'm a virgin and I want to have sex with my boyfriend. How can I relax?
Q. I am 24 years old and still a virgin. I have recently decided that i am ready to have sex with my long time boyfriend. We have tried once and I freaked out. I couldn't relax and kept moving my legs and hips! I am just so scared that it is going ...
A. 27 June 2008: You are 24-years-old, you say, and if you have indeed decided to become sexually active, you should experience no problem at all. It will not "hurt really bad" as you suggest, providing your boyfriend is reasonably considerate and perhaps somewhat ... (read in full...)
Can you tell me how to squirt?
Q. I've always wanted to act sexy and one of the only things that all the men that i know say is sexy is to squirt when i'm having an orgasm! can you tell me how to squirt please! my boyfriend does not mind me not squirting but i would love to. and ...
A. 24 June 2008: As others here have said, squirting is quite rare and it is surprising that any significant number of your male acquaintances suggest that it is sexy - or claim to know much about it. If more than one out of about 50 or so females in your ... (read in full...)
Who here is against recreational sex? Any antisexuals?
Q. I know several asexuals but only a handful of antisexuals. It's disheartening that I often feel I am alone on this. While asexuality is gaining acceptance, people ridicule those who are against sex. The only sex I am not against is proc...
A. 24 June 2008: To each their own life, and . . .
Live and let live.... (read in full...)
How do I know when she's orgasmed?
Q. Probably a stupid question, but I'm curious, how do you tell when a girl comes? I never know unless they flat out tell me. I figure they could be faking it, but a friend was saying a girl comes when she's wet, but I've gotten girls wet withou...
A. 18 June 2008: Dude, we really never know for certain. Wetness is a good clue that you have succeeded in getting the woman very excited, but that is no guarantee that she released. In addition to the wetness, and along with your passionate and patient attention to ... (read in full...)
Problem maintaining an erection...
Q. I have trouble maintaining an erection but in my case I put it down to the drugs that I have to take to control my epilepsy. Is there anything I can do to help myself?...
A. 11 June 2008: As a 60-year-old contributor here, I can relate to this general problem but not with the epileptic treatment affect. All I can say is that many medications subject those of us who need the good part to some undesirable side effects.
My personal expe... (read in full...)
Are there any good methods I can use to be better aroused?
Q. I am finding it difficult to come when having sex with my 52 year old female partner. Is there any good methods I can use to be better sexually aroused? ...
A. 11 June 2008: Everyone is subject to having unsatisfying sexual relationships either occasionally or perpetually - especially as years go by - but your question does not provide nearly enough information that even hints at what may be the root problem. ... (read in full...)
I never orgasm during sexual intercourse, but when I masturbate I do... why is that so?
Q. I'm a very sexually active 25 year old female. I have been having sex on and off for about 7 years. I have noticed that i NEVER orgasm with sexual intercourse, but when i masturbate manually with my own fingers inside, i can orgasm in less than 10 ...
A. 10 June 2008: Tisha-1 nailed it again. But I emphasize that there are a growing number of men out here beginning to understand and appreciate the exquisite pleasure of satisfying a woman - and how to do it.... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a girl to not like oral sex on her?
Q. My girlfriend doesn't like me giving her oral sex and is really squeamish about it. I feel as if its because she has a problem with me. I've only gone down town once and that was for about a minute. I've never heard of a girl who didn't like oral...
A. 6 June 2008: Some women reportedly don't like it, although I have never met one of them.... (read in full...)
Will I ever find that special girl, who's never had sex with anyone before me??
Q. Why does it seem like the whole world is having sex, when I've lived for 19 years and am still a virgin? My friends that I've known for many years are all in these serious relationships with girls that they liked for so long, and are now constantly ...
A. 6 June 2008: Well "Collaroy" took off on you pretty strong for the "sloppy seconds" comment, and right well perhaps, but I do understand your general frustration when considering a potential mate for life (maybe). And I'll add the thought about choosing the ... (read in full...)
Will I pee if I have an orgasm?
Q. I have never had an orgasm before. When I think I am going to get one I have to go to the bathroom. They say that is what it feels like, but I really have to pee. Is their something wrong with me? Is their something that I can do in order to exper...
A. 4 June 2008: Yes, it is well known that most women feel that urge as you say, but it is usually a false need. It is certainly not unusual. Your question about experiencing an orgasm is a major subject, but first of all relax and enjoy. ... (read in full...)
I feel weird that my boyfriend wants a threesome!
Q. My boyfriend of almost two years really, and I mean really wants to have a threesome with me and another female. He swears that he doesn't have anyone particular in mind but wants us to find a girl willing to do this. I have never done this bef...
A. 4 June 2008: You SHOULD feel very weird about your boyfriend wanting you to participate in such activity, but I'm a much older (and perhaps a bit wiser) man who would have cherished the opportunity back when. But is that really what a loving boyfriend would ask ... (read in full...)
I want to try cunnilingus one day but I feel it's disgusting... how to get over this feeling? How to start?...
Q. i want to try cunilingus one day because the i hear it's satisfying to ladies. but i feel it's disgusting. can anyone tell me how it feels like in your mouth and how it smells? i have this feeling there's a bad oduor in there. how do i start?...
A. 31 May 2008: Indeed, cunnilingus is possibly the most effective way to thoroughly please many if not most women. More can be said about that, and you can read a great deal about it by using this Web site's search fields. But to answer your question, the taste ... (read in full...)
I don't really feel comfortable telling others that we through online dating!
Q. Me and my girlfriend of 2 days met using a dating website, i like her alot and shes great but the fact that i used a dating site makes me feel like i was desperate and i dont really feel comfortable telling others that we met that way. Is that b...
A. 31 May 2008: First of all, why do you feel the least bit obligated to tell anybody about your private life, such as how you met your new girlfriend? Details such as that are of no business nor any particular interest to "others" -really. But secondly, many ... (read in full...)
How do you figure out why your wife of 30 years is always against having sex?
Q. How do you figure out why your wife of 30 years is always against having sex? She always has an excuse too tired, doesn't feel well, has to go to sleep you know the drill. Is it normal for women at 50 to get this way? I am finding it hard to even ...
A. 29 May 2008: Well, I've been there and done that, as we say in Texas. Actually, you have my congratulations for reaching 30 years of marriage (apparently) before the boredom of "familiarity" sets in. It seems difficult to maintain a sexual excitement after many ... (read in full...)
What can I do to keep him coming back for more sex?
Q. I've had sex all sorts of ways but now can't think of anything else to do. I ONLY perfer MEN. What can i do to make him keep comming back for more. I love going DOWN, and back door sex. I let him cum in my mouth or anywhere he wants too. He gets ...
A. 28 May 2008: In my opinion, some degree of an obsession with sex is not unusual in your age bracket - most of us experience such, including myself many years ago - but it is a good idea to expect your man to be more than a sex provider. You may or may not care ... (read in full...)
Do all males experience pre-cum?
Q. Hey, I'm just wondering... Do all males experience pre-cum?...
A. 28 May 2008: No one can speak for "all" guys, but I think it is fairly universal except if there is some kind of abnormality. The physiological purpose of pre-cum is as a lubricant, but it can contain some sperm - and it can potentially cause pregnancy. ... (read in full...)
How can I bring up sex without making her feel like all I'm thinking about is sex?
Q. I have been dating this girl for about 3 months now and we have not gone much further than making out. I really like her and want to become more intimate with her. She seems to be a pretty shy person and i dont wanna make her feel uncomfortable. We ...
A. 28 May 2008: Advisor "Tremor" gives good advice, but a simpler interpretation might be in order. From an older man's point of view, my advice is NOT to talk about sex much at all, unless your girlfriend brings up the topic. You may be surprised that your girl ... (read in full...)
Sexual life after marriage? How does it change?
Q. I'm a 29 year old male, and have been thinking about how relationships change after marriage. Maybe you can share from your experiences? I am particularly concerned with the fact the few couples that I have discussed with have told me their se...
A. 25 May 2008: Ok, I'm 60-years-old, have been married three times - one for over 20 years - and there were also long-term live in girlfriends. So maybe I have some input if you could appreciate an older viewpoint from someone who still thinks like a horny ... (read in full...)
Should we be friends with benefits or just completely call it quits?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and 8 months. We do love eachother but last night we called it quits. We just feel like our personalities clash and we have different hobbies. I thought I would be okay with the situation because he ...
A. 25 May 2008: You two are still very young. These kinds of troubles and relationships happen at your age. Such things are a bit easier to deal with as we get older and become a little more mature (sorry but true). While it has mainly occurred in the distant past ... (read in full...)
Crap first time.
Q. I'm not the most articulate person, so forgive me if this is a bit poor. When i was fifteen i lost my virginity, to this day i regret it and if i could turn back time i would. Basically it was a really bad experience with a girl that i wasnt eve...
A. 23 May 2008: Not a big deal. We all learn as we grow. Move on with your life, do no harm and keep learning.... (read in full...)
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