A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: my g/f broke up with me about 2 weeks ago and i'm still depressed. she was my first g/f and i'm 18 and she's 17. i thought everything was going great but i had noticed somethings but ignored them, thinking i was paronoid. after visiting her for a few hours i went home and she calls me and breaks up with me. what really gets me is that she says she cares for me so much and wanted to take it slow. we dated for 3 months and only messed around. in her last relationship she had sex a lot, and it bothers me. she says she feels afraid to be in a relationship and stressed out. the afraid part is a result of her past i think, but i can't figure out why she would feel stressed. i know i treated her better then any of her ex's. should i feel used? do you think there is any hope that we'll get back together?
View related questions:
broke up, depressed, get back together, her ex, her past Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (30 June 2008):
The truth. in my opinion, is that lovers absolutely use each other - and somewhat selfishly enjoy each other, but it should always be in a willing give-and-take situation. It's a matter of willingly satisfying each oner.
The factor that makes it all worthwhile is when two lovers "use each other" in a very loving, caring and considerate way.
A
female
reader, dangerouslove. +, writes (30 June 2008):
Do you feel as if you were used? Maybe you were, maybe you weren't. I think that maybe she thought alot about everything that has happened in the past, was she hurt from previous boyfriends, did they treat her badly? If so, she may think you could do the same. If you treat her better then any of her other previous boyfriends then she could also be intimated and think she's not good enough for you. I think at times we all think it's better to push the one we love away, cause we think its easier that way. I think theres a good chance you guys will get back together, but theres a good chance that you won't. Just give her some space, and after a while, try to talk to her about it. Tell her that you still love her, and that you would never hurt her. But, I really cannot fit the pieces of the puzzle together. I am not inside her head, so I really don't know what shes thinking or how shes feeling. But i think a good talk is all you really need. If that does not work, then move on. You are still young, and there are lots of people out there! Don't be depressed, just think postive! I hope everything works out for you.
Keep me updated.
...............................
|