What can I do with this rather odd employee?
Q. Hello. I am a manager for a small store that has about 20 employees, most of whom are full-time. They tend to have consistent shifts/days, and most people have been there for 2-3 years so they are a pretty tight-knit group. I have hired some new ...
A. 18 August 2014: Yeah, I do. You have a clique. Unless this new employee is being unprofessional or making mistakes that hurt the company, then she isn't the problem. The non-workplace drama with the invites, cruelty, 6th grade Mean Girl behavior is what is ... (read in full...)
Why do I always choose the wrong people?
Q. Why do i only ever get crushes on and date total jerks and bi*ches. I never learn and always end up getting broken and hurting so bad. I KNOW what the majority of the guys and girls are like, but i still fall for tjem, love them and end up ...
A. 18 August 2014: For you to ask *this* question, at your age, is awesome. Many people 10 years older than you and more aren't this self-aware, and they continue dating jerks, players, and users without wondering why they keep finding them.
There isn't anything... (read in full...)
I want to hate my boyfriend so I can leave him
Q. Dear Cupid Im with my current bf for past 4 years. Its been 6 months since we actually had a good talk, went on a romantic date.... I just come home from work, cook dinner and wait for him, he hangs around with his friends after work, come home ...
A. 18 August 2014: Any guy who is worried about wasting MINUTES talking to his actual girlfriend is cheating on her. Every sign you're talking about points to this. A guy not to talk for weeks about you asking him to help out around the house is not simply an ... (read in full...)
I hooked up with a friend after a break up and now am worried I might be pregnant
Q. I just recently got out of a relationship with a man I was with for a year. He didn't break up with me formally. We had our last date then he ignored me and gave me the silent treatment until I realized (a month later) that this was his cowardly way ...
A. 17 August 2014: You're open to advice and criticisms and that's good, because I'm going to give you a hefty dose of both.
1. Why are you not on birth control? Never ever rely on someone else to take care of birth control in a casual sex setting, and a FWB *is*... (read in full...)
He never called. Did he lose interest?
Q. So I met this guy at a family BBQ. He arrived sort of at the very end so we didn't speak much, we had a slight conversation and before I left to go home he asked for my number. I asked why and he said he wanted to talk after the BBQ, so I gave it to ...
A. 17 August 2014: I'm sorry to hear that he didn't reach back to you. I think the reason may be found in your original post when you said:
"we had a slight conversation and before I left to go home he asked for my number."
From my experience, most guys who re... (read in full...)
He never called. Did he lose interest?
Q. So I met this guy at a family BBQ. He arrived sort of at the very end so we didn't speak much, we had a slight conversation and before I left to go home he asked for my number. I asked why and he said he wanted to talk after the BBQ, so I gave it to ...
A. 13 August 2014: Two days isn't bad actually. Many guys wait a few days so to call so as to not appear desperate or clingy. Usually it's if he hasn't called in a week that he's lost interest (or has gained interest in someone or something else).
When to make fir... (read in full...)
I love the girl, but not the relationship. what should I do?
Q. Hi everyone Firstly, I just want to say. Constructive advice only. I know lots of people on here like to give hard hitting "advice" however really that will not help me. I love my girlfriend very much, and she loves me. It is long distance an...
A. 11 August 2014: I've been on here long enough to know that when a person comes on here with a laundry list of what they do not want to hear from us, it is because they are terrified that what they know in their hearts to be true will be confirmed by the aunts. In ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend called me a stalker and it was justified because of my actions. What should I do to recover from this?
Q. This morning my boyfriend borrowed my phone and saw that i had typed in google the name of a girl that he had recently added on a social media site to see who they were. I denied i had done it and didnt know how it was on there which was an obvious ...
A. 9 August 2014: No, calling you a stalker is not justified, and his over-the-top reaction to your Googling a woman he added on social media is a red flag.
In fact, HE borrowed your phone and looked through it tracking YOUR history on it? That makes him more a s... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has turned into an egotistical jerk! Do I end things?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 months and we used to have the perfect relationship. He used to buy me things, he used to be so nice and considerate, and he would always make me feel special. But recently, it just stopped. He's obsessed ...
A. 8 August 2014: I agree with the others in that you should leave him. Nobody says crap like that and deserves a girlfriend. I also don't think he's going to the gym like he's been saying, at least not all of the time. I think he's "making gains" with something ... (read in full...)
He's separated from his wife and she's pregnant but he says he loves me. Am I crazy for even considering him?
Q. This is going to be crazy long and probably a crazy story. Thanks for bearing with me. My best friend is a male. We've been friends for 3 years. When we met he was married. I was dating and I was never interested in him anyway. Flash forward to a ...
A. 8 August 2014: I hate to be so direct with you, but YES, this is an extremely foolish idea for considering this. This is not good at all, and I think you have romantic blinders on to what kind of person your guy friend truly is. You have been swallowing this ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend's father caught us fooling around and now I'm invited to dinner? I have no idea how to act!
Q. My girlfriend is 16 and we have been dating for 10 months. From day one her dad has hated me, even her mother sys that mainly he just doesn't want to let go of the thought that his "little girl" isn't so little any more. I have always been ...
A. 6 August 2014: I partially agree with CindyCares, except for the part about you having been forgiven. This dinner isn't about forgiving you. It's about their daughter loving you. Now, I think that it's possible that by the end of dinner, they WILL forgive you, ... (read in full...)
The feelings of anger and resentment are starting to creep in after my break-up. I don't want to feel this way, please help me...
Q. I'm going through a breakup with my ex. We split up less than a week ago. At first, I harbored no anger or resentment. In fact, I felt very at peace in my heart about it. I was hurt and sad, but I understood and felt okay and calm. I felt thi...
A. 5 August 2014: You're going through the stages of grief, which in your case is the death of your relationship and your life as a couple. This is normal, and having happened less than a week ago, no wonder this is all happening. Do not contact her in any way, ... (read in full...)
Finally after years of no sex my wife was happy to have sex this week. So why did it feel so unsatisfactory and unfulfilling for me?
Q. My wife did not have sex with me very many years (more than a decade) and in my mind I always felt like sex was that one missing piece that would rejuvenate the relationship. I really missed it, I craved it, and it made me feel lonely that we stopp...
A. 5 August 2014: Why no sex?? From your post, it sounds like she is the one responsible for the lack of sex, and that you were the initiator and the one rebuffed until you just let the whole issue go. Why did she stop?
Something's missing from your post, an... (read in full...)
My niece is kissing me on the mouth, does this mean anything?
Q. the daughter of my wives elder sister, a mature 50year old single woman, never married, when we meet which is not regular, at the moment, but we are moving closer, I notice has started kissing me full on the mouth when we meet.nothing is said but ...
A. 5 August 2014: I know you're not Richard Dawson and this isn't the Family Feud, so we can rule that out. Also, unless kissing on the mouth is a family tradition as it is in some cultures, then this has to be dealt with.
The first person you tell is your wif... (read in full...)
My husband works nights and sleeps on and off during daytime while he looks after our son. I want to put my son in daycare then, advice?
Q. Hello everyone, I have a question about daycare. My husband and I have a son who will be two in September. My husband works overnight and I work through the day. During the day my son stays at home with him while he sleeps off and on. I have been ...
A. 5 August 2014: I wholeheartedly agree with you. Your husband is unfit to watch a toddler if he is sleeping on and off, and he also needs to have sleep like someone who sleeps at night does. If his sleep is broken up by a toddler constantly like it is with a ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and I don't have sex and he finally admitted that my weight was a problem. If he doesn't love me fully for who I am today, then why does he deserve me later when I am thinner?
Q. So I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 8 months. We have been friends for years, and he said that there was something about me that made him want to take it to the next level. I love him, and I am pretty sure he loves me. But here's ...
A. 5 August 2014: First of all, a huge congratulations on your weight loss! If you've lost 70 pounds, you have earned the right to hold your head as high as you want to. All of my best hopes and good thoughts for you on that second 70!
Your post is differen... (read in full...)
Have I been over-thinking the issues surrounding bringing a dog into our new home?
Q. I really need some advice. This is something I'm getting all OCD about! For my entire life, I have always wanted a dog. My partner and I have a brand new home, we're yet to have children and it just seems like a good time to bring that speci...
A. 4 August 2014: I grew up with a lot of dogs. My mom bred them for several years, and we had dogs from the time they were little puppies until they were old and they lived long, good, lives full of love.
I don't think anyone should be shot, but I too get real... (read in full...)
His foot fetish makes me feel like he doesn't fancy me enough to maintain an erection!
Q. Hey aunts and uncles! I've been in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend for about 3 months (I've known him for a year)....we see each other at weekends and sometimes through the week if we both have time off work... Things are goin...
A. 4 August 2014: That's not the foot fetish's fault. I've dated a guy with a foot fetish in the past, and your guy's problem is that he won't reboot his sex drive in order to be adventurous.
The real question is - is he willing to try new things? Is it that he ... (read in full...)
My slob of a housemate has bitched to our friends!
Q. I live with a guy who is a complete slob. Not a couple or anything but we are friends. We live in a rented house and we deal with an accomodation agency. Last monh he was given plenty of notice that the agency was coming to inspect the house as ...
A. 4 August 2014: How do you deal with this guy? Laugh at him. Who do you think looks worse in the story he told your friends, him or you? You saved both of your hides from fines. He's a pig to live with, and now it looks to your mutual friends that he's immature ... (read in full...)
Help I'm so lonely, and keep getting rejected!!
Q. I'm lonely and confused.. I'm a strong and very independent woman, I run my own business and have been in 2 long term relationships, I never sleep around and only slept with 4 people at 23. Normally I'm a happy single and have lots o...
A. 4 August 2014: Your last guy took you for a fool? That sucks, coming across human garbage that used you and dropped you. First of all, recognize that it's your ego and sense of rejection that you can't get past now. You can either let this guy keep taking ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my fiance with my ex but only told him we kissed.
Q. My fiance and I have been together for over 5 years and we are set to be married in a month and a half. I ended up sleeping with my ex and told my fiancé that we kissed. I was going to tell him the whole truth but he went ballistic anyway. He was ...
A. 4 August 2014: You've already ruined your future with your current fiance. To marry him now would be a crime against humanity. You cheated on him. You didn't even have the guts to come clean about it. It's already over, and if you marry your fiance now while ... (read in full...)
I want to move, but he doesn't. Are we headed towards DIVORCE?
Q. Dear Agony Aunts and Uncles, My husband and I are both in our early 30s and have been together for about 6 years now. We met and married in the city we currently live in, but, as of a year ago, I've begun to grow weary of this place and am frequent...
A. 4 August 2014: I understand how you feel, and I really can see your husband's side in all of this as well.
Do you have kids?? I grew up moving across country several times growing up, and I can tell you that it's very difficult for children to deal with the... (read in full...)
Should I let my fiance know I found out she was still an escort during our first month of dating, or should I let it go?
Q. Hi, I'm really having a hard time dealing with a bunch of things that I found out about my fiance. I don't know how to approach her about a lot of things I found out, and I also don't know what I really want out of the future. In order to rece...
A. 4 August 2014: I've gotta be honest with you...I don't feel good about your future prospects for a good relationship with her. I think she is using you to "get clean", so to speak. I also think that you've jumped the gun in many areas, and you've committed some ... (read in full...)
Do guys always stop intercourse after they cum?
Q. Hello agony aunts and uncles! So I just have a pretty straightforward question, do guys always stop intercourse after they cum? Every guy I've been with has. But I've heard before that not everyone does (i don't know if they're lying or not) th...
A. 3 August 2014: Not much more to say because Tisha and the other aunts and uncles covered it all perfectly. However, I'm confused about something because what you have said is intriguing to me...
If you both are monogamous, you're on birth control, and you both... (read in full...)
Should I marry a female therapist/psychologist?
Q. I just thought i would ask this question. Basically I'm a sensitive man....not a weak man...but i had a very unhappy childhood/ dysfunctional family. And alot of bad things have happened in my life...(bad luck, life failures, betrayals by others ...
A. 2 August 2014: Things aren't "behind" you if you still have issues stemming from them. You can either choose to react to them as if you were a helpless child, or you can turn those past hurts and dysfunction into a force for good. If your family abused you so ... (read in full...)
Should I marry a female therapist/psychologist?
Q. I just thought i would ask this question. Basically I'm a sensitive man....not a weak man...but i had a very unhappy childhood/ dysfunctional family. And alot of bad things have happened in my life...(bad luck, life failures, betrayals by others ...
A. 2 August 2014: Dating a therapist is fine, but don't make her YOUR therapist. I read your post and their follow-ups. Being a therapist is extremely draining. Listening to people work out their issues is very draining. A relationship is a give and take, and you ... (read in full...)
Will I have difficulties in pregnancy because the man weighs alot more than me?
Q. My boyfriend weights 124 kilograms and my weight is just 56 kilogram. We're planning to have a baby. Will I have to face any difficulty during pregnancy because of the fact that I'm going to get pregnant by a man who weights a lot more than me?...
A. 2 August 2014: No, you'll be fine in pregnancy and childbirth. All sperm looks the same.
I would be interested in hearing about this guy's eating/exercise habits. Is he 124 kg because he is bulked up with muscle and height, or is he 124 kg because his lifestyl... (read in full...)
Our flatmates only growl at me when he's not there! I suffer from anxiety and depression so this is very difficult for me!
Q. I don't know what to do. This year I moved from one city to another to live with my long distance boyfriend of 2 years. It's about six months on now. The move was really hard for me cos I'm shy and i left behind my close friends and the place I was ...
A. 30 July 2014: I agree with the anon female - bring up your grievance to everyone at the same time. That way there's no one who can cry "misunderstanding". You tell everyone that you are sick of people moving your food and stuff, that you have one shelf and they ... (read in full...)
I'm in a relationship but it's not feeling like one!
Q. When we first went out 3 years ago, everything was perfect. He tried his best to do what ever he can just to make me happy but because I don't mind anything and he kind of stopped doing because he said I don't really mind anything he does and I'm ...
A. 29 July 2014: If he is long distance, breaks his phone and destroys his laptop so that you have no way of talking to him (I don't believe it, but say he did that), that is called a BREAK UP.
He's doing everything he can to break up with you and ditch you. It... (read in full...)
Mother-in-law's name for the baby's middle name?
Q. Background: SO and I have been together almost a decade. We are married and expecting a baby (our first) in 4 months. A few questions: Would you be okay with giving your baby MIL's name as their middle name IF... ...your MIL has in th...
A. 29 July 2014: Why would your MIL be generous to your face financially, yet nasty behind your back? How were you told about her bigoted remarks and her comment about birth control? Was this comment made before you were married?
I speak as someone who was hate... (read in full...)
He left me, I moved on, now he wants me back!
Q. Hi aunts and uncles Here's my problem...my partner broke up with me six weeks ago after three years. I was upset but the spark in our relationship had disappeared long ago and so I was happy to move out. I missed him for a couple of weeks...
A. 27 July 2014: You do realize what's happening, don't you? He kicked you to the curb. Now he knows someone else is seeing you and you're interested in you. This is ego. It's like the kid who drops his toy and doesn't care about it until he sees another kid ... (read in full...)
Found the girl of my dreams. Am I being too clingy?
Q. So I've found the girl of my dreams she makes me a better person and I have never felt this way about anyone before. The problem is I'm afraid I'm being too clingy as of recently we haven't seen each other as much as we did, due to work. we hav...
A. 26 July 2014: Understand where the source of clinginess comes from. It's your insecurity. You found the woman of your dreams, so now you're scared you'll lose her, or she'll lose interest, or another guy will take her, or whatever. Relax.
You've only bee... (read in full...)
I'd like to give him oral but I'm not so sure about his hygiene
Q. I want to give my new boyfriend, of 4 months, oral sex, but I've noticed an off smell down there, and I think it's due to him not washing himself properly under his foreskin area. The other guys I have been with in the past haven't had the ...
A. 26 July 2014: I think you should gently tell him. Tell him that you're not used to guys who haven't been circumcised yet, and that sometimes but not always, you notice a smell down there that may interfere with you giving him a mindblowing BJ. Just ask him ... (read in full...)
I'd like to tell him I've fallen in love but I don't want to pressure him
Q. Should I tell my boyfriend I am falling in love with him? We have been together for only a few months but it hit me recently that I am in love with him. Or should I wait for him to say it first? I don't wana put pressure on him to say it if he ...
A. 26 July 2014: A few months is WAY TOO SOON. You could scare him off, AND you should wait for him to say it first. For a girl, saying "I love you" or "I'm falling in love with you" is an expression of emotion. For a guy, it signals a commitment that brings on a ... (read in full...)
He had a girlfriend but I let him take my virginity ....
Q. I met this guy almost a year ago, we became friends and started talking a bit. I started liking him but found out that he has a girlfriend so in my head I kind of labeled him as well just a friend even though I liked him. One day I dont even rem...
A. 26 July 2014: The only opinion I have is that he's cheating on his girlfriend. It's simple - you need to get away from him and not let him use you anymore. Any words a cheater says are worthless, so the whole Vegas thing is crap, and do NOT give him nude ... (read in full...)
My friends and family say he will cheat on me because he is in a band!
Q. I've been dating this guy Jake for a few months he is 25 and a singer in a band. He also works with a local contracting company. Most of my family and friends say that are relationship wont work because of his "free" behaviour and that he goes out...
A. 26 July 2014: I disagree with your friends and family that he'll automatically cheat on you because he's a musician. That's like saying he'll automatically be dishonest because he's a used car salesman, a scammer if he's a mechanic, or a money-grubbing ambulance ... (read in full...)
Am I over-reacting to what I discovered about my Bf's Hooters visit?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 months. Recently, he went to Hooters with his friends and at first, I was pretty annoyedd but then I got over it until I found videos in his history of Hooters girls. Am I overreacting because I feel lik...
A. 25 July 2014: Nah, Hooters isn't all that bad. The girls are eye candy, but he's not "choosing" them because of any deficiency you have. If anything, his being at Hooters could work up an appetite he brings home to you because you're his number 1 girl.
Have ... (read in full...)
I miss my ex but I don't know why..I don't want him back!
Q. My ex was controlling, manipulative, unwilling to work, immature and treated me like his personal bank. Towards the end of our 3 year relationship he also started to get physically abusive and extremely verbally abusive. We have been split for 2...
A. 25 July 2014: if you took out an order of protection against him, DO NOT CALL HIM!!!! Do not do that. He can file charges against you for slander, or sue you for entrapment for trying to entice him to talk to you when there is an order against him. You can ... (read in full...)
How do I get my 73 year old husband to wash every day?
Q. How can I get my husband of 73 to wash everyday? He gets upset when I pull away from him as even a kiss makes me feel sick...he never brushes his teeth, I change pillow cases every day as they are smelly and greasy! We have single beds now...I ...
A. 25 July 2014: Did he used to wash every day? Does he have health issues?? Have you been direct with him as in "You smell like you are wearing urine cologne" or have you been dropping subtle hints?
When my father got sick with Leukemia, he went from being im... (read in full...)
I've made it clear: monogamy is my preference. Am I over-reacting to his suggestion re a threesome?
Q. Help my partner has told me he would participate in a threesome with me and another man if I ever wanted that . I told him that I would never ask for that and the fantasy is one thing but in real life a threesome is not something I'm interested in ...
A. 24 July 2014: What a jerk. He caught himself in his own lie and tried emotional manipulation on you to try and soften you up for the idea of a threesome with another woman.
You said this:
"He replied that he would never ask me anyway as he doesn't want tha... (read in full...)
I caught him talking sexually with other men but he denies it!
Q. I need help! I have caught my boyfriend (for the second time) talking to men sexually. We are happy (or so I thought). we've been living together for over a year. He denies everything, i even sent the "mystery man" an email, he says they never ...
A. 24 July 2014: Listen to me very carefully... if he was talking sexually to other women and you verified that by talking with the other woman, would you even DREAM of saying to him "I wouldn't think differently of you"?! Of course not! You'd be devastated, ... (read in full...)
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