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... Send *asteofIndia a private message | | | *asteofIndia's profile:TasteofIndia here. I'm 33 years old, with my BA in Theater & Psychology. I suppose you could say that I have studied people and how to get into their heads. I've been here on Dear Cupid for well over a decade. I love Dear Abby, Ann Landers, all those advice giving goddesses... when I found this website how could I resist?? (Couldn't.) I love Dear Cupid, love being a moderator and love giving advice when I can!!
A lot of people ask if I'm from India... just to clear things up, I'm not. I'm not Indian, I just really liked that song by Aerosmith when I first made this account. I've never been to India. I'm not even an Aerosmith fan, really, but I really liked that song at the time.
I've been with my fella for 14 years, married for 10. We have two cool daughters and a pretty cool life that involves lots of adventure, art and laughter.
I adore: positivity, theater, llamas, fromage, sweatpants, earrings, and sitcoms. That just about sums it up... |
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I want a name that is mine..not a generic name!
Q. I've posted before about how I hate my name, and I've decided I want to change it. It doesn't sound like a big deal, but I've never been able to identify with the legal name I got. I feel like it's not even my name and I was meant to be named ...
A. 12 February 2009: Change it! Change it! Change it! Change it!
(that was supportive chanting, if the tone didn't get across via the world wide web.)... (read in full...)
Do guys prefer blondes over brunettes?
Q. do most guys perfer a pretty blonde to a brunette. any guy i have known always went for the blondes heavy or thin. do guys not like brunette are we not good enough or pretty enough like the blondes...
A. 11 February 2009: Okay, not hating on those blonde bombshells, but I'm a smokin' brunette and I wouldn't trade it for the world. I've never had trouble finding a fella, even have completed for a guy with a blonde - I took home the trophy (but dropped the guy a few ... (read in full...)
Does he not want his sister to know about us?
Q. Ok, so I call my boyfriend out of the blue. He likes me calling him every now and then.. This time he was relaxing in his room and his sis was there. We talked about a minute or two. And I noticed he wasn't talking that much so I let him go and w...
A. 11 February 2009: Hi darling,
I really don't think you have anything to worry about. He probably doesn't want to make his sister nauseous by being all cutesy and cuddly with you on the phone. Maybe they've got a relationship where she would either tease him endl... (read in full...)
I want a name that is mine..not a generic name!
Q. I've posted before about how I hate my name, and I've decided I want to change it. It doesn't sound like a big deal, but I've never been able to identify with the legal name I got. I feel like it's not even my name and I was meant to be named ...
A. 11 February 2009: You know, my best friend changed her name when we decided to randomly move across the country. I loved her old name (Caroline), but she hated it with a passion. She said it never fit her, never felt right. So she changed it (to Alethea, if you were ... (read in full...)
Do other women ever feel a little aroused during their period?
Q. do anyother women experience feeling a little horny during your period? i don't think i could ever have sex during a period, but sometimes i feel a little up for it. must be to do with hormones of something? i guess i'm lucky, as i never have hea...
A. 11 February 2009: I second all of it!!
So annoying!... (read in full...)
Is it still possible to fall pregnant even although we both had alcohol in our system?
Q. Well my ex boyfriend and I Got drunk and slept together having sex on Saturday 2/7/09 and Sunday 2/8/09 unprotected and about 3 times and all, 3 times I believe he ejaculated in me I checked my ovulation calendar and both of those days we're my ...
A. 10 February 2009: Alcohol is just about the OPPOSITE of contraception. How many people have gotten knocked up while using it? Countless! And now you can probably add yourself to the list. Not to mention, you were both prone to any sort of STI/cootie that either one ... (read in full...)
Are we truly in love?
Q. Dear Cupid I went out wit this guy 4 two months and we broke up because of a realistic reasons. After a few months we became really close, but we never went out. This tym we started going on dates and ended up kissing. When it comes to sex he ...
A. 9 February 2009: Is this "true love"? Well, I don't know. A bunch of strangers on the internet couldn't determine that. But, does he love you? Do you love him? Well, it sounds like it to me. If he follows you to be with you, it's very romantic and something that ... (read in full...)
My soon to be husband expects us to live with his family
Q. im confused and need help!! ok im 20 atm and have been dating by boyfriend since oct "08". we have known eachother since june 2008 during the time i met him i went overseas for three months and he would call and text me while i was away.I hAd stro...
A. 9 February 2009: Your intuition is leading you in the right direction. I would be wary of this whole thing. You are being smart in your thinking - protect yourself and your future. If you feel like you're being "rushed" and "tricked", and your ears are starting to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't trust me after I kissed a boy for a play and then kept in touch with him unappropriately!
Q. Hi, about a year ago i was involved in a play that required me to kiss this boy during many rehearsals for about a month. at the time i had a boyfriend of six months and i'm still with the same guy. after the play ended me and the boy kept in touch...
A. 9 February 2009: Don't drop your passion for theater for a guy. As a theater gal myself, I say that you need to reeeaaalllyyy talk to your guy and make big changes or break up with him. He can't ask you to give up something that you love so much. It's unfair. What ... (read in full...)
How can I be more aggressive?
Q. Hi. I have been with a girl for a long time now, and things have always been fine up until recently. Lately she's been saying that she needs more aggression from me, but I am not an aggressive person and I get nervous being aggressive around her ...
A. 9 February 2009: I agree with Kepi, maybe aggressive isn't the word she's looking for. Maybe she's looking for more assertiveness. Do you initiate sex? Do you push her up against a wall and kiss the bejesus out of her just because? Do you pick her up (literally pick ... (read in full...)
Will people think I am just rebounding?
Q. Hey i broke up with my gf for 1 month already she is from the other class in my batch, well now there is this girl in my class that i like and i want to go after her but i am not sure if i should since people might think i am just rebounding what ...
A. 9 February 2009: Eh, you're young, you bounce back quickly... if you feel like you're ready to go for it again, go for it. What other people think doesn't matter, you go by your own timeline.
Go after her!... (read in full...)
He says I'm a deep thinker and wants to see more of my personality
Q. I have a huge crush on this guy i think he might like me too but i don't know. He's rather friendly to most people (smiling, joking, etc.) so it probably isn't anything special that he's nice to me and smiles at me in the hallway...but he told me ...
A. 9 February 2009: He seems to find you really interesting, and he wants to get to know you more. I'd say that this guy is definitely curious about you, crushing on you. Go for it! Ask him if he'd like to get to know you over some coffee...?
Good luck, sweetnes... (read in full...)
Will all boys make me feel like this?
Q. Hi! These a boy who i went out with and then we split coz he wanted sex and i didnt also it turns out he was seeing some other girl just for sex! . Im only 14 and hes 16 so i wasnt ready. But hes asked since then first time i said yes but it didn ...
A. 8 February 2009: What a jerk. Leave your ex, leave him in the past where he belongs. He's just a horny barely legal teenager who is having too much trouble thinking with his brain and not his dick. You are way better than that, besides if you end up having sex with ... (read in full...)
Am I bisexual? Will I grow out of this?
Q. I am a female teenager who is confuseed about my sexuality. I masturbate quite often and unfortunately I cant get turned on by the thought of a man.. Only girl on girl action really gets me aroused... but if im dating a male and things get rowdy.. I ...
A. 8 February 2009: Hi there,
Personally, I think that there is an awful lot of gray area between gay-straight-bi. So, why be so hasty to throw yourself in a box? You're young, and still developing your sexuality... just chill out and be with who you feel attracte... (read in full...)
Took break now g/f is depressed!
Q. Hey, I need some help. My girl friend and I got in a fight last weekend and I told her I needed some space at the end of the fight to think things over. She got really depressed and now she doesn't feel close to me and resents me for not checking on ...
A. 7 February 2009: Men are from Mars, women are from Venus, right?!?!
I can totally feel you. Most men withdraw when they fight, they appreciate space to breath and think. They would just prefer to be alone and chill out. A lot of women (like your girlfrie... (read in full...)
Did I ruin her birthday by saying I wasn't ready for under the pants action?
Q. okay ineed a little help... mee and my girlfriend have been going out for over 3 months now,, and she's great, i love her to death, i cant be without her and she loves me too-she's a really great grl.. so yesterday was her birthday and she...
A. 7 February 2009: I think that you are really, a very cool and very smart guy. You did completely the right thing - why the heck rush when you have all the time in the world? I know that you may regret your choice a little later, but just remember that you have an ... (read in full...)
How do I get his attention when he's always listening to an ipod
Q. How am i supposed to get this guy's attention if he's listening to his ipod all the time? i swear, he even does it when our teacher is giving a lesson and he's only in that one class of mine so it's the only time i see him... what should i do?...
A. 7 February 2009: Write him a note!... (read in full...)
Is it unusual for a man to have more than one orgasm?
Q. Is it unusual for a man to have more than one orgasm? I'm in between relationships and started a FWB situation with a male friend of mine. While we were having sex, he pulled out and ejaculated on my stomach. Then he went back in and kept going. He ...
A. 6 February 2009: It's unusual, yes, but certainly not unheard of. Consider yourself lucky, lucky, lucky!
By the by, if he's pulling out so that he doesn't get you pregnant, it won't work if he's sticking himself right back inside you! You can and will get pregnant... (read in full...)
I think I'm a lesbian, but I still sometimes think guys are cute. Help! I'm confused!
Q. I Think im bisexual or Bi-curious. I dont know what the heck i am. I think girls are very attractive. Sometimes more then guys. I kinda hate guys. But i dont enjoy sex anymore with a male. I dont enjoy sex what so ever because of my crystal meth ...
A. 6 February 2009: There is a lot of gray area between gay-straight-bi. Don't be so hasty to throw yourself into a box! Just call it bi-curious for now, I guess... it sounds to me like if you need to label yourself something, that would be the most accurate.
BUT, ... (read in full...)
How many sleeping partner have you had
Q. Hi im doing a survey about how many sleeping partners (vaginal or anal) you or anyone you know, GF/BF etc, has had? Plz also state how sure you are of yours and your partners number! Plz be honest as there's no need to lie because you can just put...
A. 6 February 2009: I'm female, 22 and I've had 1 sexual partner (100%)
My fella is male, 26 and has had approximately 24 (we're 85% sure about that one. Could be anywhere from 22-25). Both from the grand ol' USA.
I think your theory is a questionable. Bu... (read in full...)
Can an unfulfilled fetish be a deal breaker?
Q. I've fallen in love with the most remarkable woman I've ever come across. We have, it seems, all the right things in common, yet have enough differences to keep things interesting. We communicate well, we laugh often, and we love intently. Our ...
A. 6 February 2009: Hey there,
I agree with SatinDesire, this isn't really a fetish, per se. It's a kinky thing that your girlfriend is into. But not a fetish. I don't think you have a deal breaker situation here... both of you seem to really love each other and she ... (read in full...)
How do people deal with turning 30?
Q. how do people deal with turning 30. don't say its just a number becasue it's not .any techniques at all. because i am turning 30 i never had a boyfreind i didn't even get my first kiss sad i know life is very hard for me and still is.what do i do....
A. 6 February 2009: Here is the coping technique:
You need to make your life more exciting. NO one gets more amped about anything just sitting around in stewing in it. Break up with a guy? Don't just sit at home moping about it, go out with your friends and forget i... (read in full...)
Am I special? Or did I just take the bait?
Q. I'm a little concerned about the guy I'm dating, I mean he told me how lonely he was in his marriage (divorced now)and how they didn't have sex for the last 2-3 years of their marriage so in turn, he cheated on his wife. The problem is, it sounds ...
A. 5 February 2009: It seems like you took the bait, sweetness. Don't make the mistake that his poor ex-wife made and stick around thinking that he will commit to you, love you, be faithful to you. He won't change and he's just reading you the same script he's read to ... (read in full...)
I really want to go to prom, but can't go with my b/f and he doesn't want me to go!
Q. My end of year prom is coming up school and as part of the school rules we are not allowed to bring anyone who is not a student from the school to the prom. Also everyone has been paired up with someone in the class who is basically our prom date. I ...
A. 5 February 2009: Go to your prom!!
The memory of your prom will probably last a lot longer than your current boyfriend. I'm not trying to mean, but seriously... go with your friend and have a blast. It's prom, after all!! Maybe arrange some time for your boyfrien... (read in full...)
Mom says I have to break up with boyfriend
Q. i need help real bad!!!! im 13 and my bf is 17 my mom just recently found out and now she is telling me that i have to break up with him. i know im too young for him but im in love with my boyfriend he is just so perfect and he is not the kind of ...
A. 5 February 2009: Your Mom is trying to do what is best for you. She is just concerned as any Mom would be, that a 17 year old boy is interested in such a younger girl. On paper, it seems a little creepy, sweetness. I really hope he's not wanting to have sex with ... (read in full...)
Do I have reason to be worried, or do guys say things like this all the time?
Q. me and my boyfriend have been together 6 months now. we love each other and i believe as a couple we are very strong. however i came across a comment on a networking site that he'd made 5months ago to a girl he was seeing about 10 months...
A. 5 February 2009: Girlfriend, stop worrying. The way he phrased it was so sterile! Not a "daaaaamn, girl!!" or a "You look so amazingly hot in your pic". Just a "you look pretty". He could've said that to his sister! If he really was after her, he would've at least ... (read in full...)
Why am I not getting a g/f?
Q. Wot s wrong wid me? Um 19, shy type, everyone says i m handsome, i do body building, i am trendy, um not that ugly. Then why not i am getting a gf? Naturally nothing came in me that how to pick a girl or ask her out. Um only single in my frenz ...
A. 5 February 2009: Hey, even the hottest people on the planet go through dry streaks now and then. Just relax, chill out and you'll find a girlfriend. It always ends up that when you're out there really actively trying to find a girlfriend, you never do. As soon as ... (read in full...)
Will this Leo-Virgo woman be compatible with a Capricorn male?
Q. Hello, I'm a 37 year old blue Capricorn tooth brush. She's a 31 year old Leo-Virgo-cusp tooth brush. I am very attracted to her. Do you girlies out there think we are likely to hit it off based on star-sign compatibility alone? Thanking you in ...
A. 5 February 2009: Well I've been a Leo and used tooth brushes for a long time. I have gotten along with everyone who uses a tooth brush, even fresh-breathed Capricorns. Correlation? Yes, I think so.... (read in full...)
All these ups and downs are driving me crazy
Q. I'm been dating my girlfriend for more than 7 years, and yes we have had our ups and donws, and 1 year ago we started living together but it didn't last long, it only last 3 months and then she move out, but we started dating after a while, and ...
A. 5 February 2009: It sounds like she's not very good at breaking up. I think this girl needs you to give her space so she can figure out her life and figure out if you're the right guy for her. 7 years is a long time and if she hasn't been able to live with you for ... (read in full...)
He's got a baby on the way but says he loves me
Q. Hi,my b/f and i just started dating. on our first date he took me out and he got me drunk we had sex that night. I just find out the morning later that day that he got a anather gal pregnant by him. he told me he loves me en cant let go of me in ...
A. 5 February 2009: So, let me catch up. Your first date together, he classes it up by getting you shitfaced and sleeping with you. Then he tells you that he's knocked up another woman (probably with the same classy first date that he took you on).
I will tell you... (read in full...)
I like her but I'm terrified of going on a date with her
Q. I've always identified myself as bisexual. Even though I have fancied women and maybe shared the odd kiss, I have never been seriously involved with another woman, and have always dated men. I'm currently single. I've recently met a girl, who is ...
A. 5 February 2009: It sounds like your heart isn't quite all the way into bisexuality. That, or you're just reeeaaalllyyy nervous about your first date. Heck, I was super nervous about my first date with a boy, I'd get the same jitters with a woman.
I went through ... (read in full...)
Someone is trying to blackmail me
Q. Hi I have some problems with someone blackmailing me online. He has threatened to post some pictures ( compromising ones) online if i do not do what he wants me to. I do not know what to do. I only know him online. I have no idea of his ph...
A. 5 February 2009: Go to the police immediately. Doesn't matter how embarrassing those pictures are, the police have seen worse. I wouldn't try to handle this yourself, I would turn it right over to the authorities and let them handle this online creep. Please be ... (read in full...)
I have ill mother and have been summoned for jury duty!
Q. have just got a letter telling me that I will be included for jury sevice from september this year until september 2010. I rang them to ask what I should do as my mum is blind and needs to have her medicine administered by me. We have home care to ...
A. 5 February 2009: Jury duty. Ahhh, Jury Duty. You can call them up and let them know your circumstances. They are often willing to work with people like you who have schedule conflicts or a really good reason why they can't participate. They can postpone your Jury ... (read in full...)
My g/f & I are now tiptoeing around each other so we don't argue!
Q. My girlfriend and I are having problems. It just seems like all the things we don’t like about each other have just arisen into the spotlight in the last 2 weeks. We don’t argue like cats and dogs but are instead ridden with insecurities and ...
A. 5 February 2009: You guys just really need to learn to talk. It doesn't say how long you've been together, but my fella and I have been together 3 years and we're still working on communication. It has a lot to do with sometimes not getting your way, learning to ... (read in full...)
Extremely frustrated by the lack of sex in my 6 year relationship, help!
Q. Dear Cupid, I am a 24 year old male and my partner is a 21 year old female. Recently ive been extremely frustrated by the lack of sex in my 6 year relationship. I have a very healthy desire for sex, so much so I would have it everyday if ...
A. 5 February 2009: I've been in my relationship (he's 26 and I'm 22) for 3 and a half years. Over those years, the average has shifted around. Sometimes once a week, sometimes 3-4 times a week... in the first year, it was like 3-4 times a DAY.
It can switch around. ... (read in full...)
How do I casually ask for a guys address?
Q. Alright here's the problem, I bought these 2 necklace's and I really want to send the guy I'm madly in love with one of the two, but I'd have to do it by mail. But I don't know his address! I want to ask him but I'm scared it will get weird, how do ...
A. 4 February 2009: "Would it be weird if I sent you something through the mail? (... "no, of course not!")... Awesome, what's your address?"
That sounds casual to me. I wouldn't be too tricky because he might just get weirded out if you mysteriously obtain his addr... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is interferring with his sister's love life
Q. My boyfriend wants his sister to stop going out with his very close friend. He just found out they are going out on dates and stuff...told her to end it. He feels that he's a bum and is only being nice to her to get into her pants. I guess he kno...
A. 4 February 2009: Well, YES it was wrong to read and delete messages. That's like going through someones mail (only proverbially. I'm pretty sure that deleting a text message is not a federal offense). Your brother shouldn't have done that.
It is sweet that you... (read in full...)
Can you get addicted from smoking just once?
Q. well i am 19 years old..and i have never smoked a cigarette all my life..all my friends do..i want to try smoking 2 just once..is there anything wrong in smoking once..or would i get addicted???...
A. 4 February 2009: GIRLFRIEND!!!
My friends? All smokers. Me? Wasn't one until I wanted to socialize with them. I just smoked once, and then again on a different night and within a few months they successfully passed their dirty habit on to me. I still don't sm... (read in full...)
Could my boyfriend be gay because he watches she-male videos?
Q. i`m 22 years old i have a 2 year old daughter and im 6 months pregnant and my boyfriends goes on porn alot but when i recentley check what videos hes been on it says chicks with dicks and shemales does that mean he could be gay?...
A. 4 February 2009: Does it mean he COULD be gay: Well, sure. he could. We'll get back to that.
Does it mean is IS gay: Absolutely not. Tons of guys and girls get down to some she-male porn. It could be a fetish, as 'aman' says, it could be a phase of curiosit... (read in full...)
My b/f keeps going out & partying with her and she's crushing on him!
Q. Would you be uncomfortable if your bf was going out partying with a girl, every weekend, and sometimes even during the week, but not just any girl, a girl who has a major crush on him, a girl who has made moves on him? My bf is doing all of the...
A. 4 February 2009: What a dip!!
Seriously, on this specific web page I see about 56725468 reasons NOT to be with this guy and find someone much, much, much, much better. Respect yourself, this guy clearly doesn't. You deserve a guy who makes you feel a whole lo... (read in full...)
He would never last more than 2 minutes!
Q. Does this seem odd? I was with my ex boyfriend for 2yrs and in all that time when we had sex he never lasted more than 2 minutes! Hes only 30. But before i met him he had slept with nearly 100! We never talked bout our sex life i just accepted it. ...
A. 4 February 2009: Ugh, thank God you ditched THAT loser.
Seriously, without knowing this guy I feel like I already know him. Probably pretty good looking, he's somewhat charming - he thinks that he is amazing. That's how he gets the chicks. Then he gets them int... (read in full...)
My world is falling apart
Q. I'm having a really tough time in my life right now. My dog died and I thought that I was grieving but now I think that i'm depressed. I don't even smile anymore and if I do its for a short while. I also have problems at school with this guy named ...
A. 4 February 2009: I'm sorry that your dog died - I've been through that too and it hurts so badly. Take your time grieving.
I wouldn't pursue this Robert guy. Any guy who calls you dumb and isn't supportive, considerate or sensitive to you when you're going th... (read in full...)
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