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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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I have a great g/f but I'm bored. Do I keep her or let her go?
Q. Here's the Story. I'v been With this girl for almost 2 years, And she treats me better then gold and It's hard to find a girl that good. but must have gotten bored and my gf isn't big but she has curves I like thin in shape girls. Her sister i...
A. 8 October 2012: I know she treats you like gold, but this is not something you value, you value excitement, thrill of the chase and young thin bodies. I don't think you can have the cake and eat it too. She might agree to an open relationship right now but this is ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says he wants a break so he can date other girls
Q. Hello, I am in a rather interesting situation. My boyfriend well currently ex boyfriend lives with me. And hes confusing and hurting me emotionally. But lets go back to the beginning 4 1/2 years. We met while I was on a field trip when I was stil...
A. 7 October 2012: He is dating women as it suits his needs and he doesn't care about hurting them. If you tell your parents more about what he did I am sure they would want him out immediately. He knows he is not welcomed at your place, he can't get any sex, that's ... (read in full...)
Have I ruined this relationship?
Q. My disclaimer now: you will think I'm immature, you will see discord, drama, mistrust, and more...so please, meet my question where it's at for who we are...thank you I'm 27 he's 28. We met a year ago and he swept me off my feet swearing we will...
A. 7 October 2012: He is up to no good. You can only make excuses for him for so long. His actions are showing you that he's sharing his privacy with you, so stop bugging him because you won't find hard evidence of cheating (despite plenty of suggestions), so just be ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to want my boyfriend to buy me things?
Q. Is it wrong to want my boyfriend to buy me things? I don't mean expensive jewelery or anything, but we've been going out four months and he's never brought me flowers, or chocolates or anything. He's only ever once or twice paid for dinner. I feel ...
A. 7 October 2012: I don't think you are petty at all. At 4 months you should feel comfortable to tell him what you like. So what he thinks buying flowers and chocolate is outdated and cheesy, and that spending money is materialistic? The most important thing is you ... (read in full...)
Have I ruined this relationship?
Q. My disclaimer now: you will think I'm immature, you will see discord, drama, mistrust, and more...so please, meet my question where it's at for who we are...thank you I'm 27 he's 28. We met a year ago and he swept me off my feet swearing we will...
A. 7 October 2012: He is the immature one. If you are made to feel you are the bad person here he has worked wonders on you. Smily and flirty texts are not acceptable and you were not making something out of nothing. Giving you passwords so you can snoop does not ... (read in full...)
She's separated and available..do I act on it?
Q. A good friend of mine separated from her husband two months ago. They have been married two years, and together for about three years before that. There was nobody else involved in the breakup, it just didn't work out. It was essentially my friend's ...
A. 7 October 2012: There is no way a separated woman for two months is available for another relationship. She is not even at that stage to determine whether you are two are suitable. She needs time to get used to life without her husband. Before that she needs time ... (read in full...)
Platonic friendship with Ex, is it even possible?
Q. Hi everyone. So i was wondering if anyone has been in or knows of someone who has been in my situation for some advice. My ex and i have 2 wonderful sons, we drifted apart after 9 years together, we were childhood sweethearts and were together fr...
A. 7 October 2012: It's very hard because you know him for so many years and even if he didn't admit his feelings for you, you would have felt them anyway. You must have strong reasons for breaking up and it is easy to get carried away with sweet words and remembering ... (read in full...)
Is there a way to find if she is interested?
Q. I been seeing this girl at college nearly everyday. We usually always do something afterwards, although simple things.. as friends. She invited me to go cinema with another 2 friends. I declined as i was busy but offered to go next week. Suprising...
A. 7 October 2012: The only way to find out if she is interested is to make a move. You also have to be more outspoken about what you like about her, but in a casual way. Sometimes interest has to be developped and inspired. Relying on signs is passive. If she turns ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be with cheating b/f let alone have sex with him!
Q. My bf has stepped out on me, more than once, and engaged in sexual activity with these women. I’ve attempted to leave the relationship, but he refuses to let me go, telling me that I am the one he really loves and wants to be with and wants a ...
A. 7 October 2012: Leaving a relationship is never easy but in your situation it's easier than most. Think of married women, married with children, or live in partners. They have more things making them stuck in these relationships while you don't. Also think you can ... (read in full...)
Am I just in Rebound territory? I like the geeky gym instructor who flirts with me, and he is a good kisser
Q. Ok for the last few months I've been going to the gym. My fitness instructor and I get along really well and I got to know him more and more with every session. I know for a fact that he doesn't chat that much with any of the other girls like the...
A. 7 October 2012: You are just trying to get him on a deeper level and see if you are a good fit later. You are not using him to forget your ex. He too will be careful and will go with his pace accordingly. Time will tell if you can develop a trust. Just have fun and ... (read in full...)
I'm not handling this break well at all
Q. We were dating nine months. Things seemed great. We did have our issues, specifically I put off meeting her best friend, which was partially subconscious, partially related to my stresses about grad-work (I'm a writer), but bottom line I should have ...
A. 7 October 2012: I don't think the issue was about you not meeting her friend, or you breaching her space. Although you both have anxiety issues you are always the one reaching out for her, and she is pulling back. She is not in the right frame of mind to have a ... (read in full...)
I want to ask her out. Should I? What would be the best way to do this?
Q. Hi I've been talking to this girl online and we get on really well. I met her for the first time lat night with 3 of her guy friends. the guys seem nice and the girl i've spoke to is really nice too we got on instantly and she is very pretty too....
A. 6 October 2012: You either date a girl or remain a friend. Once you mention "friend" you are leaning towards friendship. Intent is very important. If you express interest in something more but tell her you will settle for friendship it's going to confuse her. A ... (read in full...)
I'm tired of attracting emotionally unstable people. What am I doing wrong?
Q. I am a 25 year old female with a recurring problem in relation to every single one of my romantic relationships. I'm a very emotionally stable, grounded, level-headed individual and I only seem to attract the exact opposite to this in all my ...
A. 6 October 2012: I would not overanalyze. It's a simple fact that there are many sad people out there. It's not that you can't attract someone like you. You just have to keep looking. Opposites attract at first but more importantly is you can find someone you can ... (read in full...)
Why would my boyfriend rather spend time with his friends than with me?
Q. Ok so me and my boyfriend have been together for one year now,I have known him for 4 years and things have been great until this point. We are both full time college students and we both have part time jobs so when the semester starts we probably ...
A. 6 October 2012: I guess the answer you want to know is, how important are you in his life. He stopped acting like a boyfriend, so you should ask him what changed and why he doesn't want to spend time with you anymore. You have to come here, instead of getting this ... (read in full...)
I have feelings for my male best friend! Do I let him know?
Q. My best friend and I have known each other for years. i'm a woman, he's a guy. And we've known each other since we were ten years old. Our families are so close that people think we're all related. When I was in high school I developed a crus...
A. 6 October 2012: Things will get awkward after you tell him. If you don't there is always tension. The friendship will not be satisfying when you always wonder what the potential could be. If he decides to date others do you feel happy for him as a friend, or do you ... (read in full...)
I can't help but feel resentful for the way that my boyfriend treated me in the past
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 and a half years. During the first years of our relationship, I wasn't treated the best way. He would go out with his friend to bars every Friday, we were rarely together. Once I found on his phone a picture of ...
A. 6 October 2012: There is nothing wrong feeling the way you do. There is a built in mechanism in you to protect you from getting hurt again. He is a good boyfriend now but what happens when you have a fall out again can you trust that he won't go out, drink and pour ... (read in full...)
I'm not his Gf but I thought we were friends. Then he let me down. Should I bother to contact him again?
Q. I met this guy about a mouth ago. We got close and when he'd see me, he'd carry my bags. Pick me up and hug me in front of all of our friends. He'd always give me good advice. He's everything I wanted in someone. He's smart, humble, outgoing...
A. 6 October 2012: He lied because smoking weed and playing card game aren't the most interesting habits. In fact it will turn me off instantly. He is not sure if you would accept his habit. At the dating stage only you know yourselves, what you like or don't like ... (read in full...)
I'm not his Gf but I thought we were friends. Then he let me down. Should I bother to contact him again?
Q. I met this guy about a mouth ago. We got close and when he'd see me, he'd carry my bags. Pick me up and hug me in front of all of our friends. He'd always give me good advice. He's everything I wanted in someone. He's smart, humble, outgoing...
A. 6 October 2012: After you deleted him, there is no going back. He feels like you lost respect for him and respect is a big thing for a guy to get motivated about starting something with a girl. It's a case of a guy who doesn't know what he wants. I suspect that he ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants a threesome and I don't think
Q. My boyfriend wants a threesome!! Mature answers pls? My boyfriend is 27 I'm 23 we've been together over 3 years. He keeps bringing up threesomes for years ( as he has never had one)and today over the phone (I'm overseas for 7 wks) he was talking a...
A. 5 October 2012: Very few men can actually go all the way except for selfish, narcissitic men who don't care at all for their partners. I also question the girls who are willing to be the third person intruding an existing committed relationship. Three complete ... (read in full...)
Her Mom has agreed to keep it secret. But do I tell my new Gf that I had sex with her Mom in the past?
Q. I have been dating a woman for a few months now and all is going really great. Recently she introduced me to her mother and immediately we recognized each other. A few years earlier we were in a bar and started talking to each other. She is was o...
A. 1 October 2012: There is something wrong with her mom. You should tell your girlfriend the truth. After you are broken up with her then you don't have to think about her anymore. What her family does will no longer be your business. Her mom is the one who messed ... (read in full...)
My first serious relationship. But many anxieties:( Did you go through anything like this? What helped? What didn't help?
Q. I'm currently in my first serious relationship, and have been finding it very hard to settle into things. I love my boyfriend very much but it has taken me a while to trust him, how to balance my relationship around my life appropriately, how to a...
A. 29 September 2012: What helped:
Time, life achievements, an understanding boyfriend, thinking about what makes me happy, accepting life whatever outcome, not expecting or demanding too much, look for reasons to love yourself, good sleep, diet and exercise, natu... (read in full...)
I have concerns about returning to my FWB. What should I do though? He wants to resume, but his past actions concern me
Q. Hi I realise there is a lot of questions asked about this thank you for any answers in advance I just need some opinions on this situation I have been in a FWB for 18 months now he asked me if it could just be me and him sleeping together and not ...
A. 29 September 2012: He doesn't act like a good friend, by accusing you like that. When the friendship part, communication is out, he is just a booty call and he has no rights asking for exclusivity. If he wants you all to himself he should properly ask you out to be ... (read in full...)
How do I get this balance right between wanting to be myself and neither be a doormat or too much like his ex? I want to be appropriately assertive.
Q. Hello Everyone, I've asked for help before about a relatively new relationship and it was so helpful - but I have another question please... my confidence is still a bit low in regard to relationships because I had a very difficult one for a ver...
A. 29 September 2012: There are men who treat women like a doormat because they let them, but not all men would do that, only jerks. You can't blame yourself for his being abusive. Feminine quality is much needed in a relationship, but the only kind of assertiveness ... (read in full...)
Her Mom has agreed to keep it secret. But do I tell my new Gf that I had sex with her Mom in the past?
Q. I have been dating a woman for a few months now and all is going really great. Recently she introduced me to her mother and immediately we recognized each other. A few years earlier we were in a bar and started talking to each other. She is was o...
A. 29 September 2012: If you slept with my mother, I don't want to know. If I found out later I won't be mad at you. I also won't be mad with my mom. But that's just me. If you told me I would be always wondering if you two still have the attraction, what do you do when ... (read in full...)
Is he playing games or is there hope?
Q. Ok me and my ex been off and on for about 2yrs. I just want to know is he sincere about us. Like he tells me that he knows that I'm the right one for him and no matter who he is dating or talking to whenever he think or plan out his future I'm t...
A. 28 September 2012: It would be clearer as to what future you mean. Living together, getting married, or just, being closer together and feeling connected while having a sense of security. I suspect that he promised something he couldn't live up to. Didn't he? If he ... (read in full...)
My very serious boyfriend has a 4 year old daughter he never told me about...
Q. Ive been dating my current boyfriend for 10 months now. Although ive had a couple of boyfriends in the past, this is the first time that I know ive fallen in love (im 23, boyfriend is 26). A couple of months into our relationship, my...
A. 28 September 2012: I can not love a man like that. He is irresponsible. He is not telling you because he is not taking care of the girl. That alone is worse than accidentally having a baby with another woman. Any person who is not financially ready should not be ... (read in full...)
I have very very strong feelings for a guy at work, but he's my manager.
Q. I have very very strong feelings for a guy at work. But he's my manager. For the past 3 years I have been crazy about him. I have tried my best to hide it. After all, it's not fair for someone to feel that kind of pressure. After the first year of ...
A. 27 September 2012: There is a difference between flirting and asking out. The only difference is that you are either asked out, or not asked out. Anything in between is just mind games.
I don't favor office dating but you would have gone out with your manager alre... (read in full...)
I want to be less overbearing, less insecure, and more easy going with my girlfriend
Q. Kudos to those who actually read the whole thing. Any advice would be great, be as harsh as needed. I really would like to make an effort to change, and stop being an overbearing, insecure boyfriend... I feel like I may be overbearing and ...
A. 24 September 2012: No one can truly enjoy a relationship when they anticipate an ending. You are already preparing for the break up by being possessive. When you know that she will stick by you no matter what you won't act this way. Has there been a talk about long ... (read in full...)
Can a relationship work when both families are so different?
Q. Can a relationship work when you're families are so different? Me and my boyfriend are in love and have been seeing each other for a while now, but his family don't accept me since I'm not the same religion as him, and if my family knew he wasnt ...
A. 24 September 2012: It can only work if you think a relationship is between you two, and you are okay to celebrate occasions with him and your family members separately.
You can also try ignoring the differences and stop being defensive of the relationship. I rece... (read in full...)
She climaxed several times yet she says there is no chemistry between us
Q. I recently started going out with a woman who's quite a bit younger than me (I'm 52, she's 38). The first time we made love was in a hotel room (difficult for us to have time together at either of our houses because of our children). She orgasmed ...
A. 24 September 2012: Some women don't need chemistry to climax, and some men can't come even when there is chemistry. Every one responds to sex differently. Still, an insensitive thing for her to say. When I hear something like that I would assume I don't see that ... (read in full...)
Should I go and see him or write him off?
Q. I met a guy one night that I really liked and we arranged to meet up again. The date went well until he said that he wasn't looking for a relationship and he came on a little strong so I rejected him as I didn't feel ready to take such a step. I ...
A. 24 September 2012: He is just interested in sex. Not all casual guys want one night stands only, they want the comfort and the regular or irregular contact and on his terms though. He does not care how you feel at all. He wants you to fill the gap and when you ask for ... (read in full...)
My boyfriends disrespectful past is stopping me from moving on with our future?
Q. My boyfriend has been terrible in the past, staring at other women in public, buying disgusting mens magazines and putting them in plain sight where i could see them and thinking nothing of it, flirting with other girls behind my back and thinking ...
A. 23 September 2012: You should give it time and look for consistencies between what he says and what he does. Your relationship background should reveal when you officially dated and became exclusive. When a man emotionally commit to a woman he will only think of his ... (read in full...)
What should I do about this resentment that he won't try to lose the weight he has gained?
Q. In March, I started dating a guy I've known for 4-5 years. In may, I decided that I wanted to lose weight and since then, I've lost about 25 pounds, but here's the problem. My boyfriend was about 20 pounds overweight when we made it official, but ...
A. 23 September 2012: His intention to lose weight should be independent from your weight loss success. He can only do it for himself. Being busy is not excuse. For some people, just eating less, eating right, excercising can do wonders. For others, they need medical ... (read in full...)
What would you think of an otherwise decent woman having a one night stand in the distant past?
Q. If you were dating a woman of good standing, moral fibre and integrity.... what would you think of her if you found out she made one big mistake several years ago in the form of a one night stand found from the internet? Would who she is today be ...
A. 11 September 2012: I think that one night stands are harmless if your lover is more or less anonymous. It is never a wise idea to have fun with someone you know, someone who feels proud to tell the world who he scored. There is a difference between not knowing what ... (read in full...)
I think being a 'nice girl' also made me a boring girl
Q. I am a 'good girl'. I don't cheat, I don't lie, I'm faithful and all that good stuff, so I sort of feel like I don't make much of an impact on my bfs. Ive had two long term relationships, and both times, I left them becuase I felt like I was not ...
A. 10 September 2012: If you are not creating beautiful emotions in your boyfriends, that's because they are still not over their exes and are with you as a rebound. I am sure at the beginning of their relationships, everything was beautiful until the moment she cheated. ... (read in full...)
Should I confront my wife about her old pictures which I found?
Q. I was going through some photos with my wife, and came across a couple of her I didn't recognize. I know what year they were taken, and it's the year we broke up for a couple months. During that time she had a fling with an older man. I've been ...
A. 9 September 2012: It takes a lot for a couple to break up within a marriage. A separation, yes, but it is assumed that as a married couple, you can talk things over together. It depends on whether you discussed the terms and boundaries for how long you will break up, ... (read in full...)
When I initiate sex my boyfriend rejects me
Q. me? I’ve been rejected a lot.? Me and my boyfriend are dating for like 2 years now.. and for a year and a half sex was great, but now its different… He always refuses to have sex with me when I initiate it. It gets me really frustrated. His reason ...
A. 9 September 2012: I am not sure what's the frequency now but, as much as your body thinks you need sex x times a week, you don't. You might have used regular sex as a measure of love, like before. Assuming that everything else is doing fine in your relationship, your ... (read in full...)
Why did my friend go back with her boyfriend after he cheated on her?
Q. Hey Guys, It's ,e again. It's not about me this time, it's about one of my close friends,she was recently dating a guy, that cheated on her... He told her straight over the phone and for a few days was a total mess, crying over just his name. But ...
A. 9 September 2012: She is going back for the reassurance that she is still desired by her boyfriend. I don't believe in once a cheater always a cheater. After this incidence the trust is gone but what she wants right now is not a long term thing with him, but a ... (read in full...)
Is my wifes best friend playing games?
Q. Over the last few months my wifes bestfriend has been going through a divorce. My wife and i have known this women for around ten years now and over those years have given her the support she needs during her rocky marriage, through texting, phone ...
A. 9 September 2012: Maybe she is jealous and thinking how come she got a rotten ex husband while her friend got a good one, how unfair. She could secretly admire you, but what had she done exactly to make you feel she wants to wreck your marriage in order to be with ... (read in full...)
I don't want a relationship so why is my FWB acting this way?
Q. Hey everyone, I have been friends with benefits with this guy for like 2 and half years now!!well here's the thing we met at a bar,hooked up and I thought I would be a one night stand BUT no we ended up doing it over and over again! Its been 2 yea...
A. 9 September 2012: He fell for you. The heart can't be restrained and there is no way to predict when or whether you will fall in love. He is hoping that one day you will want a relationship. Don't be hard on him for breaking the rules. Ask him if a relationship is ... (read in full...)
He can't have sex, says its his problem. Is he that broken?
Q. He and I are dear old friends. He's been married twice and widowed within a few years both times. I was married to his best friend; then my husband died. About a year and a half after my husband died we started dating. All was well, then after...
A. 9 September 2012: It's called erectile dysfunction. If you are happy with a platonic relationship then you are meant to be, but that only means his love for you would exclude passion. Whether the problem is psychological or physical, it is still erectile dysfunction. ... (read in full...)
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