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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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My boyfriend is too sensitive, and I'm tired of being so cautious around him !
Q. This is a very weird question...and I've been trying to write this properly since ages but I just can't seem to find the right words. So please bear with me! My boyfriend lives abroad and works in shifts. He can only call me when he's on a break,...
A. 28 June 2012: The problem is that this is long distance. If he were with you sitting at the sofa, you can still kiss him and make out during commercials. I strongly believe that people who rely so much on the phone to feel connected should not be in long distance ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to only want sex?
Q. Is it ok to only want sex? I mean I see that women are often irritated because the new guy they just met only seems to be interested in sex. What's wrong with that? ...
A. 28 June 2012: General questions get general answers. I have respect for men who decide they want to be single because of their career, but I have no respect for men who secretly yearns for that girlfriend experience but can't afford it. My fondest memories are ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend treats her grown children with "kid gloves" but stomps all over me!
Q. I have been in a great relationship with a lovely and wonderful woman for 2 years. We love each other very much, have just bought a house together and are engaged and plan to be married next year. Here is our problem. She has three adult ...
A. 28 June 2012: As a single mom of a 6 year old, I would be wary of how men would critique my parenting style, but I would welcome men to take part as a parent and to offer opinions or suggestions as long as they are reasonable. The fear of being a bad mom (one of ... (read in full...)
We've been dating 6 years and have never had sex
Q. i am a 24 years old virgin going out with a guy for over six years now,though we do kiss nd do some other thing,but not to have sex,but sometimes i feel pity for him just because of his patience with me.what should i do,cos i dont want to have sex ...
A. 28 June 2012: At the end of 6 years you should already know if you want to be with this person for the rest of your life. I think it's kind of odd that he never asks for it and that the make out sessions never went anywhere near sex. I would question his ... (read in full...)
If I am resigned to a lousy love life but otherwise a good relationship is that worth hanging onto?
Q. Dear Aunts, I am more in love with my current girlfriend of 5 years than I have been with any other woman, but she is a sexual dead fish. She does not enjoy sex with me and she won't work with me to improve it. Quite frankly, I think she i...
A. 28 June 2012: If you want this to work out, you need to surrender and completely say goodbye to your sex life. Place your favorite memory and then bury it in the grave. Unless you want a child with her.
Women who are dead fish are a minority. The odds that the ... (read in full...)
I'm 22, my girlfriend's 30 and I feel that she's embarassed about our age gap
Q. I've recently started dating this new girl. She's amazing, smart, funny, we get along really well with each other, we have a lot of the same interests and we just have a lot of fun in general. There's also a lot of genuine physical attraction there ...
A. 28 June 2012: I don't mind cartoons and video games. Ask her what adult activities mean? You are surely having a lot of fun together. When you are alone she doesn't get to dictate what you do. I think she is trying to elaborate what's really bothering her. She is ... (read in full...)
We never have any time to ourselves and I am desperate for her!
Q. Hey what's goin on. I need a bit of advice. I'm in a relationship with a little more of a couple years and a half. We both are 18 "high school sweethearts" you may think. But I was wondering if it's normal for an 18 year old to have urges and ...
A. 27 June 2012: If you don't own your places it can be hard to have sex. Even if you gained your parents' permission to let your girlfriend stay overnight it would be awkward doing it, worrying it would wake people up. She doesn't seem ready for sex but will do it ... (read in full...)
Do you know what he is feeling?
Q. dear cupid, soo, there's this guy that i've been on-again-off-again with for a little over a year now. i love him soo much; more than i've ever loved anybody before. he's the first guy that i ever seriously thought that i would end up marrying,...
A. 27 June 2012: He has feelings for you but somehow he has this negative association with relationships. He does not respect or trust women in general or believes that women would take advantage of him in a relationship. What he is doing now is cuffing you. He ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to only want sex?
Q. Is it ok to only want sex? I mean I see that women are often irritated because the new guy they just met only seems to be interested in sex. What's wrong with that? ...
A. 27 June 2012: I do look down on men who only want sex, because they have nothing else to offer but his penis. If men are not ready for relationships they should stay celibate until they have their lives together. It's not I am afraid of getting hurt, but cheap ... (read in full...)
After five years we just don't talk about 'us' anymore
Q. Hello. This may become a bit longer post, I am sorry for this. Help is needed because I'm 26, and I must start to figure out what I'm gonna do with my personal life If I am to do anything at all. Excuse my bad english. Five years ago I had a cl...
A. 27 June 2012: Her not getting out of the house means no relationship for you. She is waiting for you to break up with her. She is dependent on her husband and that's why she did not divorce him. If she leaves him she can't be sure that it will work out with you. ... (read in full...)
How can I approach him without seeming like I'm nagging? Think my Bf is seeing another girl
Q. Iv been dating a guy for 3 months and half everything was going on when my dad found out about us and prevented us from seeing each other, because he claims im too young So now we've been secretly dating. We were schooling together but now we are f...
A. 24 June 2012: He can deny it, so you tell him you were expecting an exclusive relationship with him. If he wants to look around still then he can move on because you have feelings for him and don't want to get hurt.... (read in full...)
Older female falls for young men and gets hurt every time! Do I stop, or alter how I feel about the inevitable end?
Q. i know im in trouble. i even know how i got here. i just dont know how to stop. im a girl who is an artist and i enjoy the company of artistic feeling when it comes to love; sensuality, beauty, emotional feeling and connection, spunk and spirit...
A. 24 June 2012: Younger men lack the maturity and the depth that an older man has. They have not lived enough to appreciate the kind of art and movies you are talking about. I also refuse to believe that every practical man living in the suburbs are into sports, ... (read in full...)
I've never met my LDR boyfriend but he wants to feel like he's got a bigger part of my life
Q. Hi,I met my boyfriend online he lives in another country we're ina LDR and we're very in love, we talk to each other for hours everyday via skype etc... and we're planing to meet next october. We totally trust each other and do our best to make...
A. 23 June 2012: If he agrees to be in an LDR, he's willing to take the risk of not seeing each other a lot and not knowing what the other person could be hiding. Still, you are not a product that he can test, return and get a refund if he is not satisfied with it. ... (read in full...)
I have a higher sex drive than he does. Its driving me crazy
Q. Ughhh! I know a lot of women struggle with this, but it is really frustrating me as of late. I wouldn't say I have an "abnormally high" sex drive, but it just seems that I always want sex more than him. I wouldn't say I had any bad/trau...
A. 23 June 2012: The lack of sex I can deal with, but not the rejection, the feeling of not loved. If he's good and attentive in other ways then keen him. A healthy woman would always want more. As you grow older you would realize biologically, monogamy does nothing ... (read in full...)
Older female falls for young men and gets hurt every time! Do I stop, or alter how I feel about the inevitable end?
Q. i know im in trouble. i even know how i got here. i just dont know how to stop. im a girl who is an artist and i enjoy the company of artistic feeling when it comes to love; sensuality, beauty, emotional feeling and connection, spunk and spirit...
A. 22 June 2012: You are not alone. I understand the classic struggle between passion vs practicality. I enjoyed reading your story. You express yourself well and your writing reflects your artistic flair. I don't want to treat this as entertainment and I really do ... (read in full...)
Willing to leave my husband for my new man, but I'm worried he still has feelings for his ex! Should I pursue a future with him?
Q. I am 29 year old married woman with a son and I’m currently in a relationship with another man. I work in this company and I met this amazing guy a couple of years ago and we became friends and at that time we don’t have anything in between us yet ...
A. 22 June 2012: First thing first, if you are already preparing future with another man you should divorce your husband first, no excuses. I am not sure if you can hide this affair from your husband. Do you think your son is going to keep quiet about the man you ... (read in full...)
Worried that we are not intellectually compatible?
Q. I am in a new relationship with a man who makes me laugh like nobody else, is affectionate, hard working and very patient. We are living together and planning to go away travelling together. I'm very physically attracted to him, I trust him, fee...
A. 22 June 2012: I am like your boyfriend and my boyfriend is like you. It is normal to feel anxiety before the wedding but you only the if he is the one after years of marriage. It seems you are the one worrying here, not him. He does not look at this as an issue ... (read in full...)
Where did I go wrong in the past? What should I do about it all now? And what if this girl starts dating this guy?
Q. Hello Please pardon this being an extremely long story, but i want all of the information to bc clearly understood so i can get a good answer. Thank you for your time I am an average teenager, but a little young for my grade. I am Asian, 5'11"...
A. 22 June 2012: With girls you should ask them out right from the start and not wait until you are close friends. A few weeks is too long. When you wait the girls sense that you are not gutsy enough; your interest is not strong enough and you will be friendzoned ... (read in full...)
It seems like he handles disagreements by breaking up?
Q. Hi I have been seeing a guy for nearly four months now. A month ago - we had a minor and I mean minor disagreement and he dumped me on the steps outside the restaurant where we had just made plans to meet seem of my friends the following weekend ...
A. 22 June 2012: When a person does this, it means he does not want to be in a relationship. They are not disagreements but little excuses or looking for an exit. He does not want to do this anymore because he realizes that whenever he says he is breaking up because ... (read in full...)
I just feel that someone of my age should have loads more experience and it's making me lose what little confidence I was gaining. Is this weird?
Q. I am 43 and people tell me that I am still really pretty, even beautiful, and look much younger. My problem is that I never had much confidence at all in my looks or in myself - I had an incredibly strict upbringing where 'selflessness' was ...
A. 22 June 2012: There are always should bes when you don't feel assertive yourself. Your upbringing made you put others above yourself.
People will express a variety of opinions but at the end your opinion counts the most.
A mother should be domestic and be conte... (read in full...)
Do you think he really only wants to be my friend, or could he want me to go out with him again, or do you think he might just be after sex?
Q. Do you think my ex still likes me ?. I heard from one of his friends that he told them that he regretted that we broke up last year, and that he thinks a lot of me. He called me out of the blue last weekend, as he had seen me out in a pub with my ...
A. 22 June 2012: You know sex is so available nowadays. He doesn't have to work that hard, and wait too long to get it. Of course sex feels good but what he is after is more than just sex. What did you tell him when he asked if you are in love with your boyfriend? ... (read in full...)
Lost virginity to two Malaysian hookers. Should I feel bad?
Q. I am in the navy and am 21 years old. When i was in Malaysia a couple years back, me and my friends were partying at a club in downtown Kuala Lumpur. We were all drinking and getting pretty drunk. Then late into the night, the club started to ...
A. 21 June 2012: The only purpose of feeling bad is that you don't do it again. It is only bad because you care about how women would think, and not that what you did was corrupt or hurtful. Some women are okay with this, but most not. When you are asking us how you ... (read in full...)
How do I play the game? And how do I make this online relationship work?
Q. Okay, well me and boyfriend have been online dating for almost six months now. I truly love him and he loves me, or so he says. We know each others faults- for example, my pessimism- and we look past that. We are good. But then some days he giv...
A. 21 June 2012: How far are you apart and is there an end to this online thing when you actually meet in person? If it is online how can you do things together?
There is nothing wrong with being available every night. If he is quiet, then stop calling him. Let ... (read in full...)
What can I do to stop this?
Q. Alright well my question may sound very stupid however please bare with me so ive been in a relationship for one year and two months and im happy, couldnt ask for more , it is a long distance relationship so its a little hard. Now me and my ex dated...
A. 20 June 2012: A simple thing to do is to block your ex. This very gesture shows you are over him and you don't care what he thinks about you anymore. If your mind drifts off to the wonderful times you had with your ex, think of all the bad things he did to you, ... (read in full...)
He's told me he's open to a relationship down the road, but there is the problem that he's married. Input is needed!
Q. I met this guy through a sort of "friend of a friend" thing and initially didn't give him much of a second thought, as he was married with kids and almost 10 years older than I am (I'm 20, he's 29). We talked on and off for a few months, but it was ...
A. 20 June 2012: So you went from abusive men to married men? A step up but still there are better options. You don't have the wild sparks for him so it shouldn't be that difficult leaving him alone. Unless he has shown you divorce papers and custody arrangements, ... (read in full...)
The love of my life used to be an escort... can I forgive her?
Q. I met the girl of my dreams... or so I thought. A little background... She is a senior in college and I'm a few years older than she is with a solid career. She is beautiful, intelligent, exciting, fun... she was the perfect woman. I never ...
A. 20 June 2012: It's not illegal. That's why people can file taxes under the profession "escort." It is paid service for companionship for any amount of time. No one is going to check whether they had sex, unless there is a dispute. Reading all the posts I still ... (read in full...)
I am not a talker but my LDR boyfriend keeps me on the phone
Q. I met my boyfriend online and it has been 7 months. He lives an hour away in a house in the rural with an 87 year old dad. He commutes 1 hour each way to work in the city. I live in the city. He visits me once a week but sometimes once in two weeks ...
A. 18 June 2012: That's true but here girls also get so crazy in love with their online boyfriends. It's a stereotype that men are distancers and need space. I am not afraid that my boyfriend will fall out of love once we are together daily. I also discover that I ... (read in full...)
I am not a talker but my LDR boyfriend keeps me on the phone
Q. I met my boyfriend online and it has been 7 months. He lives an hour away in a house in the rural with an 87 year old dad. He commutes 1 hour each way to work in the city. I live in the city. He visits me once a week but sometimes once in two weeks ...
A. 17 June 2012: He said I need to say I love you when I get off the phone otherwise he feels offended. He feels distance makes the heart grow fonder while I am "out of signt,out of mind" kind of person. If my feelings of intensity don't match his, then he thinks I ... (read in full...)
I told my bf I loved him, but he didn't feel the same. Now he's backtracking. Am I wasting my time?
Q. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I have been with my boyfriend for 6 months and we see one another every fornight. We get on very well I've met his family been invited on their holidays next January, he treats me, taken me on holiday an...
A. 16 June 2012: I assume he's the same age with you, so 6 months is the longest he's ever had? 6 months is not too early to love. Meeting parents, going on vacation is what couples do but they are not reliable indicators that you are indeed offical couples. He ... (read in full...)
I'm worried my jealousy has made me controlling. How should I deal with this in the future?
Q. Hello, first time posting. Umm.. I do not know where to begin, but I'll try. About a month and a half ago, I met a girl, I knew she was interested in me, but was not sure if she was committed to a relationship. I went on multiple dates with her,...
A. 16 June 2012: Did you express your jealousy to your girlfriend to the extent of feeling violent? If she truly understood you she would have left the place with you and not talk to that guy. It's good that intellectually you know that controlling behavior is no ... (read in full...)
My partner and I are trying for a baby, but he hasn't stopped using steroids. How can I confront him?
Q. Please help.my partner and i have been trying for a baby and recently been told he has a low sperm count due to the amount of steroids he use to take. He promised me that he is staying off them do we can have ivf. I know i shouldn't have but i've ...
A. 16 June 2012: If he is using steriod it either means he is not trying to have a baby or he is addicted and the withdrawal symptoms are bad. It will take months before his sperm count goes up to normal again. Is he using steroids as medcine or he is trying to grow ... (read in full...)
I feel so uncomfortable about this girl he is close to. Is breaking up with him the best option for me?
Q. Did I do the right think in breaking up? I'm sorry this is a long message, but just would like some clarity.... I have been from the very start, on-edge, wondering what he thinks/feels, hes not a very open person. but i chose to date him ...
A. 16 June 2012: I think he is just disgusting. You can trust that he's not going to put his penis in his vagina but he will do everything else as suggestive and tempting. When you are with him you don't even get quality time because he's so busy flirting with other ... (read in full...)
How many men out there are NOT into pornography and find it degrading?
Q. Hello Dear Cupid, I've been in a relationship nearly 4 years - 3 of which my bf used online porn most days, even perusing it while I was asleep naked a metre away from him, even though I was always happy and curious to explore our sex life. We fough...
A. 16 June 2012: You don't need a man who thinks porn is degrading in order to respect your feelings. A men can enjoy porn and stop it for you because he loves you and finds no need for it because he is with you. To hope for the small percentage of moral men is to ... (read in full...)
How many men out there are NOT into pornography and find it degrading?
Q. Hello Dear Cupid, I've been in a relationship nearly 4 years - 3 of which my bf used online porn most days, even perusing it while I was asleep naked a metre away from him, even though I was always happy and curious to explore our sex life. We fough...
A. 16 June 2012: Some porn are degrading, some are not. The problem is not porn, it's your boyfriend spending all night watching it and not considering your feelings. Moderation is key. I would dump a man who watches sports game all night over a man who watches porn ... (read in full...)
How important is relationship experience?
Q. This is a question that has been circling my head for sometime and I was wondering if you ladies can help me out with it. How important is it to you that a guy that you might date has prior relationship experience? I ask this because I'm a guy who ...
A. 15 June 2012: You just have to ignore the answer, whatever that will be. If the answer is yes, it's important then are you going to forget relationships altogether? Some women want men with experience, some women want men who had never played the field. Because I ... (read in full...)
Its hard for me to get in the mood when I don't see my husband that often
Q. My husband is a workaholic. I don't mind, because I am a competitive equestrian and I have my own life. In the rare times when we see each other all he wants to do is have sex, but I have a hard time getting arroused, because I haven't been around ...
A. 15 June 2012: Fascinating career. There are people who feels distance make your heart grow fonder while others feel suffocated in a relationship when they see each other too much. I myself am like you, I need to be with the person a lot to feel a connection. ... (read in full...)
Fallen in love with a fwb, now what?
Q. Hi everyone I know this is a common question but I really need help I have fallen completely in love with my fwb who said he didn't want a relationship which I thought I would be fine with he has just moved and I am absolutaly gutted have any of you ...
A. 15 June 2012: I have never told an FWB I feel in love. If there is any chance that he won't reciprocate I am not going to waste those precious words. When he hears these words it would not make him fall in love with you too. Just tell him you can't go on seeing ... (read in full...)
My BF says he doesn't need to wear a condom because he smokes.... is this true?
Q. My boyfriend smokes so should he wear a condom when we start to have sex because I've heard it's more difficult for a girl to get pregnant from a boy who smokes cigarettes?...
A. 15 June 2012: No, the ingredients in cigarettes are not spermicidal. There is a nicotine condom available though so he can pick whether to spend on cigarettes or condoms. They eliminate the need to smoke after sex. If he doesn't wear a condom then no sex for him. ... (read in full...)
I am not a talker but my LDR boyfriend keeps me on the phone
Q. I met my boyfriend online and it has been 7 months. He lives an hour away in a house in the rural with an 87 year old dad. He commutes 1 hour each way to work in the city. I live in the city. He visits me once a week but sometimes once in two weeks ...
A. 15 June 2012: I spend weekends with him. He had been in a serious relationship. He does want to be in a relationship now. I don't mind being single. I just don't like using phone calls as a substitute as a real relationship. I don't feel he is using excuses not ... (read in full...)
If she likes me so much why the hell didn't she go for me when she had the chance?
Q. Hello dearcupid community I need your help. I started hanging out with these girls After a while of hanging out I started getting feelings for this one girl, and she knew I like her, the catch is she has a boyfriend, so I couldn't get with her ...
A. 14 June 2012: Don't feel like a bad guy. She could be emotional because she is having problems in her relationship already and she didn't know whether to stay or leave. You are not the bad guy. It's just that when a man leaves one woman for another, it triggers ... (read in full...)
Is she playing games with this blowing hot and cold?
Q. My partner of nearly a year seems to blow hot and cold...its really difficult to cope with and I don't know what to do. We have been absolutely great for a few weeks, really close, very affectionate and making plans for the future - we're getting ...
A. 14 June 2012: Cook for her tonight then. Some women take a longer time to process feelings. She couldn't pinpoint what's bothering her but it's good everything is clear now. She is not stopping you from drinking beer or having friends. She just wants to feel ... (read in full...)
Is she playing games with this blowing hot and cold?
Q. My partner of nearly a year seems to blow hot and cold...its really difficult to cope with and I don't know what to do. We have been absolutely great for a few weeks, really close, very affectionate and making plans for the future - we're getting ...
A. 14 June 2012: You've known her for a year. You probably drank before then made love to her. Did she mind back then? She could have told you to brush your teeth or she could say she's tired then make up some other time. If this is the first time she is cold during ... (read in full...)
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