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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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My boyfriend and I can't talk and its causing problems in our relationship
Q. Greetings to all of you, I am finding it difficult to adapt to my boyfriend's way of being. He's a very susceptible person and feels offended very easily. Moreover, I'm the type of person who likes to speak to clear out our differences but ...
A. 25 November 2012: I don't like talking myself. Your boyfriend looks at these talks as threats to his well being, he braces himself and thinks that you are about to point out his short comings. He's thinking: what's the problem, get to the point here? He doesn't ... (read in full...)
Should I propose for a second time? Thoughts please!!
Q. What a god damn cliche I'm about to spew, but it's the truth and I need guidance. Girl moves next door in 5th grade, boy befriends girl. They become best friends by the summer before 6th grade and continue this sexually frustrating relationship ...
A. 25 November 2012: Have you ever talked about long term plans? Maybe you can start with smaller questions such as do you see yourself living with him, having babies in the future, do you believe in long engagements?
Now she is finished with her Phd. Is she esta... (read in full...)
Could somebody fill me in to why he's wanting to hang out, then bailing last second?
Q. I had posted a question about this same guy before (not quite a question like this), but only recieved one answer. I asked to see if people could tell me if it sounds like this guy has a crush on me. I've been so confused with this guy, honestly...
A. 24 November 2012: It wasn't a fail, but it's not a great success either. When something always come up it means you are not a priority in his life and your dates are on his terms.
Friends don't go on dates and flirt. When a person is ready for a relationship it mean... (read in full...)
She won't break up with me but isn't talking to me. What should I do?
Q. I've hurt my girlfriend really, really badly and she has given me the silent treatment ever since (2 months now). The first 3 weeks she was extremely angry and now she is depressed and avoiding me. I know she doesn't want to end this but she doesn't ...
A. 23 November 2012: When a relationship becomes unhealthy you would only do her and yourself an injustice by insisting that it must go on. You didn't say what exactly you did. When you said really really bad I am thinking of something like abuse, cheating or stealing. ... (read in full...)
How can I help my hoarding mother? She blames me!
Q. Hi guys, I could really use some help. To cut an extremely long story short, its come to my attention that my mother, who cares for my grandfather is no longer "able" to care for either him or herself. Its been this way for a years, but has gotten ...
A. 23 November 2012: I've watched a few episodes of Hoarders. There is a difference between people obsessively collecting things, finding it painful to let go of things; and people who are just too lazy to clean because they lost their drive to life. Hoarding can be a ... (read in full...)
Petty bickering. Is there a better way to resolve things? Why do we argue? How I can make this relationship work?
Q. So me and boyfriend are currently discussing why we seem to bicker and have petty arguements for over no reason. And now he seems to think it's not working. The last thing I want is to lose him. I just don't know what to do. He's said to me a day...
A. 23 November 2012: When people argue they don't feel valued and understood. Instead of focusing on your differences, try to bridge the gap by asking the other to help you understand, and for him to consider why you feel a certain way. Both people can be right, like ... (read in full...)
Our relationship is in crisis. Can you please help me with advice, before I make a mistake?
Q. So I met this girl freshmen year of college and she's perfect. Everything I want, beautiful smart, and kind of goofy like myself. I spoiled this girl, not like buying her things, but I rubbed her back, told her she was pretty everyday, basicall...
A. 23 November 2012: Basically she broke up with you to try a guy out but to get back with you in case it doesn't work out with that guy. Before you broke up she had already be emotionally cheating, by texting the other guy. Anyone knows the risk when you get drunk with ... (read in full...)
I want to know how to increase my libido
Q. hello every body i want to know how to increase my libido my sex drive high so that i can fulfill my pleasure with my girlfriend. i have heared that if i tie a black and red thread around the waist i will overcome evil eyes as well as my sex arou...
A. 20 November 2012: What are evil eyes?
I know that safer ways to increase libido is include for zinc and selenium in your diet. Seafood, avocado, nuts strawberries are good for that.
To fulfill her needs, you just need to be an attentive lover. I don't think yo... (read in full...)
He says he sees no future for us! So what the hell is wrong with me that I can't leave him?
Q. Dear Cupid I'm with a guy for 2 years, I love him, he says he does love me but also says there is no future for us since he does not want to be married to someone older than him for 5 years. 1) often talks about his marriage and talks abou how b...
A. 19 November 2012: He has already shot your self esteem down, so what good does it do when you are being hard on yourself? There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. He is taking advantage of your generous nature. When he begs for you it triggered your motherly ... (read in full...)
Do I stick with a guy who lies because he feels inadequate?
Q. Hello Dear Cupids so I have a problem I need help with. Do I stick with a guy I have known for only a month, who sometimes feels the need to lie to try and impress people because he feels inadequate about himself. OR do I...
A. 19 November 2012: I won't stick with a guy who lies. The most common things to lie in dating are age, weight, money, and education. A person who lies do not take relationships seriously. They can't handle people seeing the real them so they would settle for a ... (read in full...)
Why did he break up with me? No one can figure it out!
Q. Background:keep in mind during this that my boyfriend is 22, a county cop, and raised really well off( his mom is seriously loaded). PRIOR to me he dated a girl for 3 yrs, they were having problems so he ended up getting engaged still had ...
A. 19 November 2012: It's not about past baggage, fear of committment, you not the right pereson, his brother's wife cheating, or him not having enough to pay for the trip. There are reasons why he is not telling you the truth and he is indeed hiding something. I don't ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend had anal with me without asking first. Should I be freaked out?
Q. Hi everyone, My boyfriend and I have been together for a year now and love each other very much. We're very serious and have been making plans live together this summer. We have a great sex life-- we've very open with each other and I trust hi...
A. 18 November 2012: You have a right to be concerned because normally a guy would not be interested in anal sex and be so confident about doing it. You've come to a very delicate part of your sexuality. Anal sex is more than just tight sensations. It also has to do ... (read in full...)
I always end up loving people who I shouldn't be in love with
Q. I feel like I always end up loving people who I shouldn't be in love with... Well, recently got a nose job and it meant the world to me. I know that I am one of many patients....I mean come on he's way older than me and has a wife and a child anyw...
A. 18 November 2012: Professionals and friendships don't mix well. In the holidays you can send them cards and a present. As for the music teacher telling you he got out of a relationship, that's revealing too much and he is crossing the line. You are at an age where ... (read in full...)
He told me I may not be the one he wants but I'm the one he needs!
Q. The title says it all. My boyfriend and I have been dating for about six months and we've been recently having fights about the direction of our relationship. He always tells me how beautiful I am and how much he loves me and is in love with ...
A. 18 November 2012: I would feel he is being honest but he doesn't know how to speak tactfully. There are different kinds of beauty. There is natural beauty and stunning beauty. Stunning beauty appeals to the male ego, make people envy. It does not mean natural beauty ... (read in full...)
Does my ex want to make another go of it?
Q. Hi i need some advice. I have been split up with my ex since the summer, we have been sleeping with each other on/off since then. We both seen other people but on both sides its fizzled out. I'm confused, he's making more of an effort now texti...
A. 18 November 2012: Any dad should be giving children money and helping out. He said he's glad you are getting on better. That could mean that he is happy that you can be civil with each other and not argue in front of the children. And of course he gets to have sex ... (read in full...)
After dating he said he wanted to be friends but he ignores me. Why?
Q. I am so confused by this mans actions and hoping someone can shed some light on it. I was in a relationship with a man for 9 months, we mutually decided we could not be together long term but he was adamant he wanted to stay friends. I couldn't...
A. 18 November 2012: Some men would go to great lengths to seek two things: One, avoiding committment. Two: getting your attention. Sometimes the two stop in the way of each other. However, he is not even trying much. In extreme cases there are men who would buy plane ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with a man but my family is planning an arranged marriage for me with another man
Q. Hi.I m a bit shy gal nd love a guy onli9.I m unmarried nd never been in relationship wid any guy.Just he is d first guy of my life nd my love for him is deep.But d problem is dat we r from different country,same religion.He is indian nd me paki.I ...
A. 18 November 2012: You should get to know who that arranged guy is, and see if you could actually live with that man. If that man is gay, abusive, then of course you should refuse marriage. I don't understand in your culture, if you are eventually going to marry a guy ... (read in full...)
He went from wanting to date me to not wanting me at all in just a few days??
Q. I am just so confused at the moment. I met this guy a few weeks ago while at an event I was working at and he was attending. We got talking and at the end he gave me his phone number as in his words if I was interested I could contact him and he ...
A. 18 November 2012: Maybe he had an experience with a woman who told him she would settle with no kids but later on changed her mind so he needs a woman who is very firm with the decision no kids, with that definite answer without days of thinking. Or maybe he found a ... (read in full...)
Will the doctor be able to tell that I was sexually active a month ago?
Q. Okay so, I know this may not be the right place for this. But, I really need and answer. Alright so my parents are taking me Tuesday to get a Pap and get me on birth control. My only worry is that my parents said they're gonna have my doctor check ...
A. 18 November 2012: A few days maybe but not a month ago. Your parents cannot get private information through doctors because there is a patient doctor priviledge. Your parents put you on birth control, in case you defy their wishes and have sex anyway. A birth control ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's constant need to always be right about everything is really putting me down.
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years. We are in our late twenties. We have our good and bad times, but other that than the relationship is good, and I love him very much. We have quite a few issues to work on together, one of which is that we are ...
A. 18 November 2012: There is no right answers for James Bond's likings. Your boyfriend is very square, and looks at things black and white. That's fine but in a relationship he has to consider other's feelings and avoid being harsh. He also has to let loose and not ... (read in full...)
My friend told others that he "had me in the palm of his hand". I called him out on it and now he says he only likes me as a friend!
Q. I have met a guy at college and we hit it off straight away. It's the first time I've found a guy with the same interests and we even seem to have the same way of thinking and insecurities. It's strange. He does things like carry my bags and he g...
A. 18 November 2012: So, getting a girl is a game for him in front of his friends. He "likes" you enough to get you to like him back. You respond to him by ignoring him because you should not accept that you are just some show off trophy, prove to his friends wrong that ... (read in full...)
How do you date and keep a man?
Q. I am in my early twenties and I have had two serious relationships before. As I am trying to look for someone and just when I think I have found him, he seems to be a ladies' man, leaving me little to no hope. When your love is not reciprocated, ...
A. 18 November 2012: You don't want to keep a ladies' man. Let the man want to keep you. Remember the movie how to lose a guy in ten days? The guy still wins. It shows that when you are with the right guy, you don't have to do much to keep him. It doesn't mean you ... (read in full...)
Has anyone else been in a trouble relationship with a bipolar person?
Q. Hey everyone, Call me stupid but I was in a relationship with a man who was bipolar and I dint realise it until late.. But one night he wwas furious cause I got home late(we stay together)and he was like where have you been,can't u answer your phon...
A. 18 November 2012: I had similar experience and I coped by getting the abusive guy in jail. I was shaking too but I remembered some kind of force was helping me, if you don't believe in angels. He is just abusive, bipolar or not, and not all bipolars are abusive. I ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend proposed! During sex... Thoughts?
Q. my boyfriend proposed to me during sex. he called it making love and he asked me to marry him while his **** was inside me. i said yes but thought the whole time if he was joking and how could he ever think that this was a cool idea of proposin...
A. 11 November 2012: I wouldn't look at it as a proposal. An official proposal needs a ring. From time to time men test women to see how ready we are. They don't want to suffer the humiliation of a woman saying no so they would gauge a woman's reaction by mentioning ... (read in full...)
Should I sleep with him... or should I not?
Q. Hello everybody. I would like you're opinion... I have been sort of dating a guy, for the past 3 months, let's call him A. We did have sex but we were just friends that were in love. About a week ago we had a huge argument about me being so moody...
A. 11 November 2012: After 3 months he calls you a friend, you should cut your losses and move on. Whether one will consider you a slut it is dependent on the guy. You can enjoy sex but if the rest of the day you feel crappy and empty it's not worth it. There are many ... (read in full...)
His family won't agree for us to get married. How can they be convinced? Please help!
Q. hi i need a help very urgently. I am in love wit a boy of own my religion from past eleven years we both love each other a lot even both of our families also agreed for our relationship but things suddenly changed after his sister marriage my boy ...
A. 11 November 2012: I am not in touch with Indian culture but I feel like if you try to marry your boyfriend there will be complications in the family and you won't be happy anyway. You have all the right to say to your parents that you won't accept any guy assigned to ... (read in full...)
Broken up with her while deployed. She says I gave her too little too late. But why is she keeping my stuff, and should I have no contact with her or text her on her upcoming birthday?
Q. Apologize for the length of this...Currently I am on deployment and won't be home for about 6 months. I met my ex girlfriend about 2 years and a few months ago. When I first started dating her I wanted to take things slow. I had been in another ...
A. 11 November 2012: You did the right thing breaking up. You had concerns about her drinking rages, not being affectionate enough, adding to the instability in your lives because of the moving. I don't think there needed to be a long drawn out talk about your feelings. ... (read in full...)
How do I stay strong and not contact my ex?
Q. How do i stay strong? i split up with my ex about 2 weeks ago now. ive been doing so well being strong and not contacting her and trying to get out and do stuff. today though ive been feeling really lonely. i really want to see her, look her up...
A. 10 November 2012: Keep on reminding yourself you are a good person and deserve love. Do not be her friend. Do not believe in break ups and make ups. Have a firm resolution that the relationship is over. Be patient with yourself. Allow yourself to feel sad and do not ... (read in full...)
How do I cope seeing him with someone else when we still live together?
Q. Hi, first of all, no I should not have let myself get into this position, I know. But here I am. I'm in my second year of university, living with a group of friends from halls, one of which I dated for a couple of months during first year. I fell ...
A. 10 November 2012: You don't have to get serious right away. Just meet new people and feel desirable amongst the many fish in the sea. ... (read in full...)
I don't want to wait around for him for 6 months, it would kill me so what do you suggest?
Q. I've been seeing this man for 3 months now. He's 22 and I'm 17. There's nothing wrong with that where I live, except for the job he holds. This has required us to keep it a secret until I'm 18, which I have been fine with. Yesterday he pretty much ...
A. 10 November 2012: It won't kill you, even if at the end things change. You just have to make a firm decision to stick with him, and trust that he will do the same. Or end things before he officially does this, because he has already tried to. What do you mean by no ... (read in full...)
How do I cope seeing him with someone else when we still live together?
Q. Hi, first of all, no I should not have let myself get into this position, I know. But here I am. I'm in my second year of university, living with a group of friends from halls, one of which I dated for a couple of months during first year. I fell ...
A. 10 November 2012: You can start dating someone else. You've broken up almost a year now. The reason why it's hard for you to move on because you still had sex with him. If anything is going to distract you from him, it will be another guy. ... (read in full...)
What on earth is he playing at???
Q. Hi, I have never been very good about reading signals from men... recently at work a guy has started to make it obvious he is interested. It has been a little strange, as not the usual chatting trying to get to know me better, more he seems to ...
A. 10 November 2012: He is in love with himself. He gets satisfaction that you spend time thinking about him but when it comes to anything real, you are imagining it and he will deny it. Don't give him the narcissistic supply by commenting on his actions. Just simply ... (read in full...)
Retroactive jealousy issues/taking a "break" and getting back together
Q. I'm seeking advice on how to deal with my girlfriend's past, and if there are any couples out there who successfully took a "break," reconnected, and went on to enjoy a healthy and loving relationship. My girlfriend and I were together for 3.5...
A. 10 November 2012: There is more complication when retroactive jealousy is combined with previous issues that led to the break up. When people are in a committed relationship one partner has no choice but to deal with the jealousy but you are thinking of other options ... (read in full...)
Kismet! Could this be it?
Q. Fate, coincidence, luck.... Please read, something happened to me and I would like your thoughts... So I was having a really tough couple of weeks with work, family and things going wrong with my house and the last straw was when I was getti...
A. 10 November 2012: As I read it it sounds like the romance section in a woman's magazine, only you write it in a way that's not rosy and optimistic. You are not a home wrecker because both of you are single now. In a romance novel it always seems to end well. In ... (read in full...)
I'm thinking I should just give up and let this be the end!
Q. My boyfriend hadent text me back since tuesday. i rang to see why and he said at the time i wasnt helping the situation (his dog had just died but i was i wrote him a lovely text ). I rang him and ask him what was going on and he said that i never ...
A. 10 November 2012: I think you should break up with him. You need reassurance not because insecurity is your personality. You need reassurance because you are not getting what you want out of this relationship. You want to know where you stand. He is too young to be ... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about this?
Q. My boyfriends brother just passed away at age 49. My boyfriend has been spending a lot of time with the wife. sometimes as late as 1-2 in morning. Should I be worried?...
A. 9 November 2012: If he just passed away like the funeral is yet to take place, there will be a lot of time spent in planning and the legal stuff. If they have more time they will share their feelings and favourite memories of the brother. They both share a bond with ... (read in full...)
My first experiences with sex were horrible, and now I'm having intimacy issues.
Q. My first relationship seems to have scarred me in a lot of ways. At first I thought I was just weird but now that I am in another relationship I am scared by how much it is effecting mine and my boyfriend's life. Our sex life is so boring. With ...
A. 9 November 2012: Your ex sounds like he is angry with women and taking out on them. He needs a release and is angry about his dependency on women for that. People like that are misogynists and can't ever love women. That doesn't mean you have to adopt the attitude ... (read in full...)
Beneficial friendships
Q. I prefer having sexual friendships with long time female friends over having a relationship with a woman say from a dating site or met through friends. I had a long time friend who's married to a drunk beg me for sex. I have to say it was some of ...
A. 3 November 2012: FWBs mean guaranteed sex, no rejection no hassle no messy arguments, but also no warmth and closeness you need when you feel down and lonely. This is just in general, people want to be in relationships, but that's not to say that choosing to be ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend ABANDONED ME far from home today!
Q. THIS IS A LONG ONE BUT PLEASE READ ALL OF IT AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK: First of all, we have been together for 3 years. We're both 22 years old. We just moved in together a few months ago. We're both going to the same college full time. ...
A. 30 October 2012: This has got to be the one of the worst stories here. Please don't let it drag on to become physical abuse. I would not talk and negotiate. I think his character shows that it's already beyond talking. I would quikly like find a new roommate to ... (read in full...)
Could use a bit of advice... this girl sucks but I can't quit her
Q. So I basically just need to tell someone this story and get some potential advice on what I should do. This is kind of a follow up to an existing post I have here: http://www.dearcupid.o...
A. 29 October 2012: Give yourself a time limit and next time she falls off the face of the earth again you don't pick her up. You could be waiting your whole life before she can commit to you. She doesn't even deny that she is an asshole. When you do decide to move on ... (read in full...)
He is confusing me with his actions, what does this mean?
Q. Me and my ex split nearly 2 years ago. He had to move to another state hence the split. After the split i found out i was pregnant and had our baby. 4 months after this he got engaged to someone else. He was always in our babys life...
A. 29 October 2012: Saying he still loves you does not mean anything if he can't back it up with action. He probably said that just to get you to say you love him too, and that's why he didn't follow up with what you two should be doing. He probably broke off with his ... (read in full...)
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