A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My fiance told me he had sex twice with a prostitute just before he met me. This makes me sick to my stomach - but it was before we met. I believe he would not ever cheat on me but it still bothers me that he did this. Should I let it ruin our chance for a happy future or just try and forget about it?
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2007): Yeah.i was with a guy who was with a prostitute and guess what.He done it to his first wife and second wife and former gf.It's a sexual addiction.DON"T TRUST HIM! My man told me that he had did the same thing.They try to get you to believe in them.Don't trust him.Keep a eye on his computer history,Check cell phones,caller ID's.Vacation they tend to sneak a away a few hours.Been there done that.He can't be trusted.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much for responding with all your advice. It has really helped me put this in perspective. What you've said has backed up what I've been thinking - I guess I just needed someone else's support. Thank you so much!!
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A
male
reader, goodbutnotgifted  +, writes (20 February 2007):
 I agree with AskEve, in these times a guy can be with a woman twice as bad as a prostitute and, he did the mature thing not deceiving anyone. if it bothers you that much though the choice is easy. Goodluck
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A
female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (20 February 2007):
 I'm sure he didn't need to go to a prostitute, he could have had some one night stands and used some poor woman for his own selfish reasons but he didn't! He did the mature thing, and had a no strings "session" twice with a prostitute. He loves you enough and feels comfortable enough with you to tell you about and it WAS in the past after all.
I'm sure if he could turn the clock back knowing it makes you feel uncomfortable (if he does know) then he would but it's done, over with! He had the experience and moved on with his life. That's not such a big deal. Like I said, some men use "needy" women for exactly the same thing but he thought better than that. I would definitely forget about it, he loves you to bits and would probably never even think of doing it again. Don't let something that happened in the past before he even met you eat away at you. Bury it, put it behind you. He's with you now, he was totally honest and up front about it and at the end of the day that's all that matters.
Eve
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (20 February 2007):
 It depends. I'm sure your past isn't totally blemishless either although perhaps there's nothing as inherently offputting as sleeping with a prostitute in it. If you love him then letting go of this shouldn't be an issue. Maybe you're questioning your feelings or aren't sure you're ready to be engaged yet. Give yourself some time to sort your head out. The answer will come clear.
CD
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (20 February 2007):
 "Should I let it ruin our chance for a happy future"
Read that again.
You'll have a happy future with this guy, you know it. And this little fact, you could LET IT ruin your chances together. Now, I do understand that this makes you sick. I would be a little skeeved out too... that's a big bomb to drop. But, if you love him and you know you two are happy together, I don't think it needs to ruin your relationship.
Since you've been together, has he gotten checked for STD's and all that? If not, make sure he does that. If he already has and he's clean, you need to cleanse YOURSELF. You'll feel better about this in time. He can't change the past for you (all though now I'm sure he'd like to. I'm sure he really regrets his decision)... you're going to need to do some soul searching. Remember how much you love him, why you love him and how you're going to love him for a long time.
I think you can get over this. Try to forgive him and try to love him despite this sour moment in his past.
xxIndia
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