A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i met this guy on a dating site.we are talking by mails and on the phone before to meet 5 mnths ago.was a romantic trip.after that we met few more times.he wanted me to be a part of his life and share everythings with me.met me with his friends and parents.then just 3 weeks ago he become hard to respond to any of my text and calls.finally i menage to make him text me back by asking him why he is so quiet.the treat i got was pathetic'i can't be your boyfriend,not right now.i love you.it's hard'whole two weeks my head is frying with questions,why????we never argue even??he was the one initiate moving with me just 3 weeks ago.what went wrong??i am strong person normally but i feel helpless now,broken :(
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (26 January 2013):
 Hi
A dating site cheat, he is probably married.When you go on these dating sites you need to be aware that alot men and women, are not honest and are there for their own ends.
Its best not to have sex, to do a check on them if you can,ask about where they live and if you can come to their home (you don't have to go just watch/listen to his reaction).If they are long distance,tell them you will be in their area at the weekend and ask to meet in a very public place for a coffee.
There are alot of ways you can weed out these users.
It isn't anything you have done,you just had faith in him and took him at face value.Proceed with caution on the sites.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (26 January 2013):
 He wanted you to be a part of his life... another part is much probably filled by another woman, or other women, that eventually found out about your liaison and wasn't cool with it.
...............................
A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (26 January 2013):
 He's married or in a committed relationship already!
There are thousands of men playing this game over the internet everyday...chatting up lonely women and creating a web of lies and deceit for one reason alone...to get attention. They will say ANYTHING to get a buzz but when it comes to taking things into the 'real world' they have to do a dissapearing act...that's what he's doing to you!!
There are also women who do this to lonely unsuspecting men and sometimes they even extort money and gifts from them.
It's shitty behaviour but the pattern is the same...the minute you want to start being an 'actual' couple, they cannot face the lies they told you and they abandon ship!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, Dayzy  +, writes (26 January 2013):
There is an expression. I "smell a rat" with this guy. Ask someone what it means.
Sadly, there are a lot of crooks out there and you have to be very careful.
...............................
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (26 January 2013):
 Yeah, don't let yourself break over this guy. Sounds like he's already married/has a girlfriend and was looking for a little sex on the side, so he pursued you, met you, I'm guessing you two slept together, and then he flaked out?
The big indicator is that he's pulling out the "Love" word at this point, which is out of place here.
Listen, don't get broken up about a creep who said sweet things to get you to go to bed with him. He isn't worth it, and seriously, learn the lessons you must from this (i.e. no internet meetings where sex is brought out right away) and move on. He was a fraud and a flake. The guy you had feelings for never existed.
Internet relationships never have the same timeline as normal ones. Wait at least a year before sex ever plays into it, and do a computer background check on any person you date online. Usually wives, past children, court cases, double lives etc. start appearing and red-flagging you. Example: One of my friends started talking to a guy on the internet, and she was making plans to meet him. I was getting weird vibes every time she talked about him, (i.e. getting way too fast as in "I want to spend my life with you, I never knew what love was until I met you" crap.
Turns out, he was married with 6 kids who was about to be evicted from his house. She was distraught but confronted him, who at first lied and said he lived with his sister and her children. Well, he should never have been on Ancestry.com, because a quick check into public records gave a date of marriage and the parentage of some of his kids. My friend was really upset, but relieved she never got suckered into bed with him.
...............................
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (26 January 2013):
 I think there's more in his background that he's told you. It's a bit fast to tell someone that they love them after only 5 months.
I'd be thankful that you aren't in for longer. He's got some issues. If he's this weird about it, I'd let him go. Do NOT take this personally, it has nothing to do with your value at all, okay?
...............................
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (26 January 2013):
 He is hiding something. I am guessing a wife. He mentioned not right now because he wants you to wait until his wife will be out of town or something. Maybe he wanted to divorce his wife but then later changed his mind. It could be many reasons but you should just let him go. He is not living in reality and is too selfish to admit to the truth.
...............................
|
