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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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Need help on how to handle my Bf's mixed feelings. What should I do?
Q. This is basically about my ex-boyfriend. Recently I had came in contact with my ex-boyfriend The reason we broke up before is because he moved back to his hometown, and I didn't think a long distance relationship would have been fair. We were ...
A. 22 September 2014: Yep I missed that part about you and your boyfriend breaking up. I think he basically told you what's in his head. You are friends just catching up after a long time but because you had a romantic history a lot of emotions caught up. There is always ... (read in full...)
Need help on how to handle my Bf's mixed feelings. What should I do?
Q. This is basically about my ex-boyfriend. Recently I had came in contact with my ex-boyfriend The reason we broke up before is because he moved back to his hometown, and I didn't think a long distance relationship would have been fair. We were ...
A. 21 September 2014: Telling an ex you have a boyfriend should be enough to stop this silliness. For some people though, they like to challenge and find out if they could steer you away from the present boyfriend, especially if the break up didn't happen long ago. A ... (read in full...)
I love him but not his tattoo! How can I convince him to erase it?
Q. l been with my boyfriend for 5 years and our relationship was great. We are both 25. He loves me so much and serious about our relationship. He would do anything to make me happy. But now he has changed. Its because of me too. Its my fault. I've ...
A. 20 September 2014: You broke up for a reason. He had to change his living situation and now you want to remove his tattoo or even make him quit smoking. Maybe you got back with him only thinking about the good times you've had. Your break up did not cause him to get a ... (read in full...)
He called me names and now we are dating but I can't forget what he said!
Q. ok here is the deal fellow cupid readers i have been in a LDR with my bf for a month now and it wont be another month until i can see him again, i think about him non stop and it is around the time of my GCSE'S but my distraction isnt the issue ...
A. 20 September 2014: It seemed like you gave in because you didn't like the ambiguity so you decided to date him. He was immature and was unable to handle his emotions. People have the right to flirt, friend zoned or not. You are worried because if he called you names ... (read in full...)
After everything I did for him, LDR guy breaks off with me through a text!
Q. I met this man over this past summer in June that I thought was amazing. He was here for a 3 month internship and was going to leave to go back and finish his last year of school in a town 6 hours away (45 min plane ride). I met him through my ...
A. 20 September 2014: You had a summer fling and you totally spoiled him. Your energy was so focused on pleasing him and showering him with love. It was intense because you wanted to make each moment last. You didn't really know him so this break up came as a shock. As ... (read in full...)
Did I really love him? We are now divorcing. Why don't I feel worse? I'm not crying over this breakup.
Q. 6 months ago I thought I married my best friend and love of my life. We were together for 3 years, lived together for the last 2. It was practically love at first sight! We waited to have sex for the first time. Even our first kiss took time, li...
A. 19 September 2014: I actually think this is a healthy response. Abuse of any kind has the ability to kill all the love you had, wake you up from a nightmare and jolt you to make a decision quick. Some women with low self esteem would stay hoping to change the man and ... (read in full...)
Will it help bring us closer and stop us fighting if I become more accepting about his pot use? I don't want to lose him
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year. He smokes pot everyday, all day. I hate it, but I'll do it every once in a while. I was sober from it for 2 years, up until June, then I smoked with him, towards mid/end of July, I smok...
A. 19 September 2014: I don't think anyone in the right mind would suggest you accept his pot addiction. You will be happy if you are rid of him. What do you have to lose? A man who is not in touch with reality and can't take care of you. Being understanding is maybe if ... (read in full...)
16 years of marriage and I've lost the spark for my wife. How can I get it back?
Q. We have been married for 16 years, four kids, financially stable...I have never cheated. I don't think she has ever cheated. This has been building for some time now: when I look at her, there is just no sexual spark. It's gotten to the point where ...
A. 19 September 2014: I think you are freaking out over something that eventually happens to us from time to time, which is normal. I don't think your wife gained 30 pounds over night, it's rather gradual. Even women with an average built the spark still can be lost but ... (read in full...)
Am I Really Overrreacting or Is He in The Wrong When It Comes to Not Talking to Me?
Q. Hello. I'd like to give a little background before any opinons are made so please bare with me. My boyfriend and I will have been together 3 years this coming October and we are both 22 years old going on 23. I have asked something like this in the ...
A. 18 September 2014: I would like a guy to tell me he misses me too. I would feel the same way you do but would try not to compare with what other people do, especially exes. At the end, would you like to break up over not getting enough texts in between if he's really ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't he see my potential? Is he sexist? Complacent about life?
Q. I feel like my boyfriend doesnt understand one aspect of my life and I need help explaining this to him. I am going to graduate late next year with a degree in engineering. I have worked very hard with my school and it is because I want to provide ...
A. 18 September 2014: He will only appreciate it as he sees first hand the money you are making. At the beginning there is skepticism and also he prefers the quality of life over income. In big cities there's pollution and a higher crime rate. There are long lines ... (read in full...)
My husband wants sex every day and I'm afraid it will destroy our marriage!
Q. I feel that sex is going to destroy my marriage. We've been married 3 years, together 6. In the beginning we would have sex every day, sometimes twice or more a day, quite healthy, occasionally somewhat adventurous sex. 6 years on, a big mortgage, ...
A. 18 September 2014: Perhaps he's going on extreme on the sex because he has stress and he needs to vent with his body. I would demonstrate the effect it has on the family if you go on a twice a day routine, each an hour long. First you would be too tired to take care ... (read in full...)
I really thought my ex would be there for me as a friend
Q. We were in an off and on relationship. He would always dump me because I'm bipolar and he couldn't handle it. I am seeing a therapist because of this. He knows, but thinks I am the right girl at the wrong time. He broke up with me over nothing and ...
A. 18 September 2014: He wants a break up but is still confused. That's what a break up feels like. He knows he wants to end it for good but missing the good times and wondering if he's making a good decision. Like the heart and the head battling each other. Being your ... (read in full...)
I wanted her to be there for me too, but she seemed too focused on her own life and other people
Q. hi i'm a 19 year old girl, i had never dated until i got to varsity. i met this girl, we became really good friends and then we started dating. it was perfect at first because we were both very much into it. her life started to go a whole lot bett...
A. 18 September 2014: She is not supportive as a girlfriend and I would see that as a betrayal. People stay in relationships through good times and bad times. She is only interested in good times. She does not include you in social lives because you and your miserable ... (read in full...)
I'm scared to get hurt again but I think I'm starting to feel something for my friend. What should I do?
Q. I just came from a very bad case of unrequited love. I've been trying to get over the guy for almost two years.That guy was also the first guy I ever liked and loved so it's been two difficult years of emotional pain and ugly crying. But just five ...
A. 18 September 2014: It's taking you two years because you are hanging on to him and think that because you like him you can't let him go. You have become a slave for your feelings. He can sense that he likes you. Maybe he enjoys the attention you give him and you give ... (read in full...)
Are these signs he's no longer interested in me?
Q. Now, I wouldn't normally consider myself the clingy type but now I'm not so sure. Basically me and my boyfriend just got together for about a month and before we got together, we were almost inseparable to the point were everyone else noticed too. ...
A. 17 September 2014: I don't think you can call someone boyfriend if you are too shy to kiss each other, or to talk about where this is headed. It could be puppy love and you did things in the summer. I don't know what the arrangement for the summer was, but it must ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend has overly attached bromance...what do I do?
Q. Hello everyone hope someone out there can give me some help on this issue i have. I recently started dating a guy who is wonderful andi really do like him. We only see each other about once a week because i work and he lives about half an hour away ...
A. 17 September 2014: Either they have a mutual attraction or the friend is playing a joke here. Your boyfriend does not mind being called husband and has an obligation to him. That says a lot. I would let them have each other and I won't tolerate it as I don't want to ... (read in full...)
Which internet guy do I pick? If any?
Q. Which guy do i choose? Both are from the internet. Guy 1) Met twice, one occasion being going to a restaurant. He paid fully for the bill, i did offer and he joked saying i could pay for desert in this other restaurant. He opens doors for me, (r...
A. 17 September 2014: I would not choose either. The first one has an unstable life. He made decisions rashfully and can't follow through. He travels a lot too so you never know where he will end up. The second guy sounds like he is damaged, both emotionally and ... (read in full...)
What advice can you offer? The love of my life is depressed about his career
Q. My boyfriend and I have been long distance (10 hours distance) dating for almost two years, but have been friends for about 8 years. He recently (last December) sunk into a deep, deep depression, so much he just wanted to stay at home and sulk. It ...
A. 17 September 2014: I don't think getting a business MBA is a good idea. A college degree is not a guarantee for a job. Maybe he is sheltered and has good family support but not good connections. His dreams are shattered and finds it hard to cope. He may think an MBA ... (read in full...)
We are in an affectionless marriage! Advice?
Q. Hi I am new to the board and am in an affectionless marriage. We have been married 14 years, 3 kids. We met, moved in together and got married within a year. We used to not be able to get enough of each other, now it feels like we are nothing more ...
A. 17 September 2014: I think what he needs is space and the chance to feel anger towards something for a while. That's what he wants so give that to him. Just make sure you distance yourself from him so you don't become an object, an outlet for his anger.
In marr... (read in full...)
Why are they rubbing their relationship in my face?
Q. I have been divorced for 3 yrs. I didn't have a great marriage as my ex husband had an affair with his older child's mother. I took him back knowing what was going on and stayed in that crap for 8 yrs. One day I filed for divorced and never ...
A. 17 September 2014: My gut is telling me whenever your ex husband got with the child's mother, he's doing that to cuff her so no other men could have her. Now he's back with her to get you jealous, to make you less happy when you should be happy about the upcoming ... (read in full...)
We are just friends now but got intimate the other night, help me understand him!
Q. I've been dating my flat mate he is 28 I'm 44 we got on realy well sex was so intense we are now just friends but I have strong feelings for him he says he thinks the world of me what does he mean by this? We got intimate the other night I don't ...
A. 17 September 2014: He knows that some women feel used unless they are in a relationship so by telling you he thinks the world of you means he still respects you as a person. You are a good woman and you deserved to be loved, just not by him. So even if he doesn't see ... (read in full...)
I go out with people because I'm supposed to but I never get butterflies
Q. My problem is that I never have feelings for anyone, but i have in the past, and I want to know if anyone feels the same? I was a really emotional child and had very strong crushes on guys, the weird thing is I could never really imagine going out ...
A. 17 September 2014: You are either a one on one girl, or a circular dater. If having to make decisions and rejecting people bring so much anxiety in you, then maybe you are better as a one on one girl. I can't tell you what to do with this guy. You can come across as ... (read in full...)
I committed the ultimate sin of friendship and I slept with one of my bestest, oldest friends.
Q. The other night I committed the ultimate sin of friendship and I slept with one of my bestest, oldest friends. I was the one who suggested it on a night out that ended up just us two - proposing we try a FWB type relationship. He was surprisi...
A. 16 September 2014: You may think it is a "sin," or having sex damages your friendship. If the fwb situation did go bad in the future, one good outcome that comes out of this is that when you achieve what you want in career and as a person, you are free to find a ... (read in full...)
Is it alright to like get back with your ex?
Q. Is it alright to like get back with your ex? Some people say it's not a good idea but I feel like there isn't any harm in giving a second chance. However, I asked my teacher whose quite an expert about it and he said that people tend to fall bac...
A. 16 September 2014: People make mistakes or freak out when feelings get too overwhelming. You have to make sure breaking up does not become a habit because the more you do it, the wider the distance you create in the future. It's better to talk about it and resolve or ... (read in full...)
Is it a good idea to tell my now-ex that I was in love with him when we were dating?
Q. I'm looking for people's opinions about telling an ex that I was in love with him while we were dating. We broke up just under 2 years ago. We are not in regular contact. He told me that he was in love with me 2 months into the relationship and...
A. 16 September 2014: If you tell him now, he would be wondering what got you thinking about him and motives you have. You are still in some kind of contact so he's going to think you want something from him because it doesn't take 2 years for closure. Saying you are in ... (read in full...)
Is the older guy I've been seeing really even into me? (a little explicit)
Q. Hi everyone! So I have been seeing a new guy for about two months that I met online. He is pretty awesome, has a great personality, and is very handsome. He is about 15 years my senior (I am of legal age, 21), never married and has no kids. He ...
A. 16 September 2014: There are a few possibilities. Some men take forever to cum. He's afraid of getting you pregnant. He's made women pregnant before and regretted it because it wasn't the right relationship. He doesn't know yet where this relationship is going. ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but do not see myself marrying him
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 3 years. We are both 25 now. I love him a lot but I do not see him as the person I want to marry to. There are quite some reasons for that. He has cheated on me once with his ex, and had a problem with say...
A. 15 September 2014: I believe if you cry and make cute face for him to visit more often or to make this relationship more serious, he can't bother to.... (read in full...)
How can I get over my fear of erections/seeing women naked?
Q. I go to a very liberal college. At this college, the pool for the dorms is actually clothing optional. I went down to the pool last night and a few friends were celebrating a birthday. For a while, it was pretty fun... At a certain point, everybody ...
A. 15 September 2014: Your fear is being made fun of, it's the unknown and of the future. If I see an erect penis I would try not to look and be pleasant about it. There is a reason why it's all women and there is a double standard. It's all liberation and celebration of ... (read in full...)
Am I just being jealous? Should I move on?
Q. I've been in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend for 2 years now. We live 2000 miles apart! We met online. Well we talk everyday and have already told each we love and care about one another and talk about he wants me to move out there ...
A. 15 September 2014: We don't know him other than the things he said here. There is a lot of office banter, games and politics now he's just getting used to. I find it hard that a man would talk online for 2 years, reveal his work life, all just for a little sex. He may ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but do not see myself marrying him
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 3 years. We are both 25 now. I love him a lot but I do not see him as the person I want to marry to. There are quite some reasons for that. He has cheated on me once with his ex, and had a problem with say...
A. 15 September 2014: Uhm, if I were her I won't have 5 years to see if things improve. You have to be willing to let go and make room for a more suitable partner. His actions or lack of show that he's not keen on marrying either. It can be true that marriage is on ... (read in full...)
I get bored of people really easily! How can I have a functioning relationship if I can’t be with someone for more than a few hours?
Q. Recently I’ve realized that I tire of people very fast. I’m not much of a talkative person really, but I get incredibly lonely a lot, so I try really hard to force myself to join in with other people. Maybe a month or two back I realized that, a...
A. 15 September 2014: If you are not a talker, then you need an activity partner. Be very upfront at the beginning that you are a quiet person and you have been that way for a long time. You also need a person who is comfortable with silence. You have to find out what ... (read in full...)
I feel she was leading me on and then she pulled the carpet out from under my feet!
Q. A long time female friend, (know her 50 years) and I both divorced. We date as friends. During one of our dates she talked about sex. She told me she hasn't had sex in 7 years. It kind of sounded like an invitation, so I asked her if she'd have sex ...
A. 15 September 2014: I think I know what her weird criteria is. I remember your previous post. If she hasn't had sex for 7 years. She's the one who's feeling ugly right now. So the response she is hoping to get from you is "no, you are still beautiful, I don't ... (read in full...)
I hear less and less from my LDR
Q. I really don't know whether to stay with my boyfriend. We're in a fairly long distance relationship, about four hours away, so it's not easy seeing each other. At first it was fine because we'd text and skype all the time, but recently things have ...
A. 15 September 2014: You should tell him you understand it's hard to carry on a relationship over skype and phone, but if he's being scarce to you then you no longer feel like you are in a relationship. If he wants to cut it off then he can say so, and then you would ... (read in full...)
Should I stay and try to work things out?
Q. I am engaged, but my fiancée is asking me to do things I don't want to do. I still love him and I want to be with him, but he keeps asking me to do things I cannot do. He likes for me to go to bars and dance with strange men while dressing very ...
A. 15 September 2014: You know this man better than I do, so I hope his identity is more than just having a weird fetish. If I have to guess, he had a traumatic experience of an ex cheating on him in a club. He was forming images in his head and the only way to stop ... (read in full...)
What do you uncles and aunts mean when you say "children come first" if a childless person is dating or married to another person who has a child or children?
Q. Hi. I'd like to know, what do the aunts and uncles and others mean when they say: "children come first" if a childless person is dating or married to another personwho has a child or children? Does that mean the person with children does not have ...
A. 14 September 2014: It means if his child is sick on your sister's birthday then the dad has to attend to the child and delay going to the party. Children are family for life but girlfriends could come and go. I think that statement would sound less patronizing when ... (read in full...)
Should height be a factor in not picking someone?
Q. Should height be a factor in not picking someone? There's a guy I went out with recently, cute, sweet, funny, and we got along fine it's just that he's so short. I mean I'm short too but he's like 2 inches taller than me and I'm 5'1 I love ...
A. 14 September 2014: I am shallow but if the opportunity falls and we get along great, then it's not a factor anymore. It would help if he has confidence and you are attracted to each other. I won't think too much about it. If you have no other dates I would say give ... (read in full...)
If you've never had a girlfriend, does it get more hopeless the older you get?
Q. If a guy is past a certain age and never had a girlfriend, still a virgin, should he just accept and deal with the fact he will never get a girlfriend? Because the older a guy gets and is inexperienced, the more of a turn-off it becomes to women, ...
A. 14 September 2014: I believe you bitterness has the purpose of protecting you. You form formulas in the world and so you can predict the outcome better. If you are posting here that means you are still open to opinions. Someone who is obsessed with sex and the number ... (read in full...)
My married female teacher is about 28 and she finds many opportunities to touch me. I like it. Is this OK? Does it make me a lesbian?
Q. I am a student, 19 years old, good in studies. I am in a relationship with my boyfriend. I have a teacher in my college,she is married and has a year old son. she may be of 28 or 29 years of age. she is a good teacher. she is very friendly...
A. 14 September 2014: I don't think it's okay because you have a boyfriend and she is a teacher and should keep her feelings inside. We always romanticize those who saved our lives, and soothed us in emotional distress. Raw emotions are hard to resist. When you cried you ... (read in full...)
If you've never had a girlfriend, does it get more hopeless the older you get?
Q. If a guy is past a certain age and never had a girlfriend, still a virgin, should he just accept and deal with the fact he will never get a girlfriend? Because the older a guy gets and is inexperienced, the more of a turn-off it becomes to women, ...
A. 14 September 2014: You don't have to forgive women who played around. I should also say it's not something to forgive because many people think that's what your youth is for, explore and to have fun. A stable life does not mean a life devoid of romance and passion. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seems to be lying about porn for no reason.
Q. Thank you in advance for reading this and answering to whomever answers. I've been with my boyfriend quite a long time now and I found out not too long ago he had been watching porn, I just looked at him and said what's this? And he looked guilty a...
A. 13 September 2014: As you grow older with men, you won't be surprised anymore when they say one thing and mean another. Give him a break because if you take it literally everything a guy says and demand an explanation when there is discrepancy, you will just annoy ... (read in full...)
My ex says if I date before my kids are grown he'll keep my property
Q. My last Question was in March about the living situation with my ex. Well the relationship could not be repaired and we went our seperate ways shortly after. We are still in contact having a child together, and we are in a legal battle over some ...
A. 13 September 2014: You are not going to wait 14 years to date again. I assume you are divorced and the houses are in both of your names. Legally your ex has the right to say who can or can't be in that house, but he can't control what you do in your personal life. You ... (read in full...)
If you've never had a girlfriend, does it get more hopeless the older you get?
Q. If a guy is past a certain age and never had a girlfriend, still a virgin, should he just accept and deal with the fact he will never get a girlfriend? Because the older a guy gets and is inexperienced, the more of a turn-off it becomes to women, ...
A. 13 September 2014: You can't accept a thing that is yet to happen in the future. You are not God so you can't predict that you are never going to get a girlfriend. You are making a hypothesis based on the assumption that no women want an inexperienced man. The women ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seems to be lying about porn for no reason.
Q. Thank you in advance for reading this and answering to whomever answers. I've been with my boyfriend quite a long time now and I found out not too long ago he had been watching porn, I just looked at him and said what's this? And he looked guilty a...
A. 13 September 2014: He's lying because being caught watching porn is an embarrassing thing. We have been taught to hide our private parts and sexual thoughts from others since childhood. When he's single this has become his habit but while in a relationship he feels ... (read in full...)
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