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... Send *oubleM a private message | | | *oubleM's profile:DoubleM currently resides in Fort Worth Texas, but has lived in southern California (Hollywood), Hawaii, Europe and North Africa as well as Texas. Attended the University of Texas. Now single (possibly forever) after three marriages, one of 20 years. Mainly tries to help with sexual issues. Views and opinions are very permissive and suggestions are often brief and to the point. |
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I always end up giving my friend oral sex!
Q. I really need some help. For the past year there is this guy that I used to work with. When working together we would run off after work and fool around. Now that I don't work there any more we still talk and I'll go see him on his lunch hour and I ...
A. 1 February 2009: Well, from a man's point of view, you are a wet dream come true. Relatively few men in the Western World, and possibly on the planet, would not treasure a young women showing up on lunch hour to supply oral satisfaction with no strings attached. ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend gone wild and unreasonable
Q. My girlfriend (20 years younger) and I had a drag out name calling fight today. This has been building up for several days and exploded today. Her problem is she thinks every time she wants something from the store (usually food) or go on a drive...
A. 1 February 2009: You say that this attitude "has been building up for several days" but do not mention length of the relationship. We might assume, based on apparent cohabitation, that the relationship has considerable history. Unless her demands have been ongoing ... (read in full...)
She's inexperienced. How can I teach her?
Q. ok so my lover and i are very much in love we make out every time we see each other we have not had sex yet but we are joanzing to! i do alot of things to her like foreplay and oral but she is new at this and doesnt know how to do anything and i ...
A. 31 January 2009: One problem with your question is that you do not reveal whether or not you are a virgin, although you indicate sexual prowess if you really know how to apply oral satisfaction. And little other information is offered. Teaching a young woman how to ... (read in full...)
Do guys know if you're a virgin when you have sex for the first time?
Q. When you have sex for the first time, is there a different feeling for guys like do they feel you a virgin or the feeling is the same to when you are not one? Like how people say I'm tight and you loose? Is that really true?...
A. 31 January 2009: Penii? LOL "satindesire" you are so funny darlin'. ! I love it. You are certainly thinking, but penises is indeed the correct plural. Meanwhile, I see that my response to the young lady's question skirted the point. As you suggested, sometimes it is ... (read in full...)
Should I stay with husband? Or go to lover?
Q. I had an affair for about 7 months, both my lover and I told our spouses.Both of our spouses want to try and work on our marriages.My lover said he told his wife he would give the marriage another chance. So we were stopped visiting and only...
A. 31 January 2009: While I do not have any personal experience with this kind of thing, I have first hand knowledge of two similar relationships that sound much the same - married women friends who became involved with married men. In both cases, one that lasted three ... (read in full...)
Have I advertised "I want sex ASAP" because I talked about birth control?
Q. To start off- I'm 19 and a virgin and my boyfriend is 25 and not. We were talking last night about contraception and I told him that I've just started the pill perscription to be on the safe side but want to use a condom as well. He was a bit odd ...
A. 31 January 2009: To my friend "deejuliet," it really DOES make a difference, although highly advisable with new or multiple lovers. Well, maybe if I had had condom experience earlier in life, it might be another story, but as we used to say, it's almost as effective ... (read in full...)
Do guys know if you're a virgin when you have sex for the first time?
Q. When you have sex for the first time, is there a different feeling for guys like do they feel you a virgin or the feeling is the same to when you are not one? Like how people say I'm tight and you loose? Is that really true?...
A. 31 January 2009: This is an ambiguous situation. It was quite a while back for me, but yes, penile penetration with a virgin usually begins slightly difficult, and due to her fairly tight vagina in most cases, can be difficult to consummate from the male ... (read in full...)
Will having sex make me feel any better?
Q. i recently went through a pretty rough breakup with a girl i had been dating for nearly 3 years (she was my first)... and every once in a while it still hits me pretty hard... i have been getting involved with someone in a "friends with be...
A. 30 January 2009: In my experience, which is longer than I usually care to reveal, it usually does help to get over a past romance by beginning another. You will probably find that moving on is the better way if indeed your former affair is truly over. Try to ... (read in full...)
Have I advertised "I want sex ASAP" because I talked about birth control?
Q. To start off- I'm 19 and a virgin and my boyfriend is 25 and not. We were talking last night about contraception and I told him that I've just started the pill perscription to be on the safe side but want to use a condom as well. He was a bit odd ...
A. 30 January 2009: Well I think that you have certainly let your boyfriend know that sex is on the horizon. Whether or not that is the "right thing" is up to you.... (read in full...)
I don't want to give blowjobs but it seems like a problem.
Q. Every time I make out with a guy they always go down on me or should I say oral sex but I feel bad because they lay back expecting me to do the same thing to them which I can never do because it seems disgusting!!! I know it's unfair for them but I ...
A. 29 January 2009: Well, for the guys who still want to be with you, just tell them up front that you will not do any oral for them. It may eliminate oral for you as well, which is only fair, but at least the cards will be on the table in advance.... (read in full...)
My molers get in the way when I give him oral sex!
Q. Okay so I have a problem! My boyfriend loves oral sex but that is a big problem. You see my boyfriend has a very large penis. Not only is it long but it is fat but you see my teeth get in the way because he is so big. Not my front teeth my my back ...
A. 29 January 2009: You may just have to insert partially and use your hand(s) around his shaft to simulate deeper penetration. I think that most guys would agree that that would be sufficient, and much better than having teeth scrape our erections.... (read in full...)
Am I still a virgin and will I bleed if I have sex?
Q. i have fingered my self before. i once by mistake inserted something thing down there it hurt but i had no blood. i've never had real sexual intercourse with the exception of dry sex with my boyfriend. and my boyfriend might have inserted his penis ...
A. 29 January 2009: You may bleed "a little" for an hour or so until the small bit of damage begins to naturally heal. Maybe it will bleed a fair bit at first, but it will subside as the blood clots. Possibly the result will not be much more than menstruation. You will ... (read in full...)
Opinions about tattos?
Q. I'm getting my thrid tattoo next week and I'm curious on other people opinions on them. Personally each of my tattoos have a meaning behind them and a strong connection to some chapted in my life. I get that everyone is different but I've always ...
A. 29 January 2009: As I said, tattoos generally do "not bother me," but really big images all over some women's arms or torso would probably make me think twice about public escort if they were exposed. And may I ask, if a girl inscribes her current hot boyfriend's ... (read in full...)
Guy wants a booty call but I don't want to be one, how do I tell him?
Q. This guy Im friends with and am attracted to has been hot and cold with me, calling me recently only when he wants a booty call. We used to talk about everything from school to friends to family but now, he only talks when he wants 'some'. I do...
A. 29 January 2009: Just continue brushing-him-off, which will likely cause him to increase his pursuit, which is really all that dominates his activities now, based on your explanation. He may or may not eventually back-off, but just realize that you are presently a ... (read in full...)
Irrational fear about the male body?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been going out for a while now and we are very close and open with each other and get on really well. I'm a virgin and he's not, though he has been very understanding about my not being ready to have sex yet and has never ...
A. 29 January 2009: Oops. Accidently posted below prematurely. The conclusion to that posting is as follows:
With a firmer grip now, continue kneeling or sitting before your boyfriend, now stroking with a firmer grip, alternately with either both hands or one. Vary... (read in full...)
Irrational fear about the male body?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been going out for a while now and we are very close and open with each other and get on really well. I'm a virgin and he's not, though he has been very understanding about my not being ready to have sex yet and has never ...
A. 29 January 2009: Next time you might try the following. Have him sit on the couch or in a chair when all has gone nicely - then proceed to give him a sex little show. You said he has seen you naked, so why not strip to bare and then ask him to drop his britches and ... (read in full...)
Opinions about tattos?
Q. I'm getting my thrid tattoo next week and I'm curious on other people opinions on them. Personally each of my tattoos have a meaning behind them and a strong connection to some chapted in my life. I get that everyone is different but I've always ...
A. 29 January 2009: I'm of a different generation entirely and there is not an unnatural mark on body. Most of the women near my age (abt. 60) with whom there has been a relationship have not had a tattoo anywhere, though two had a small one. All those below age 50 had ... (read in full...)
Can sex be used to control someone or a relationship?
Q. I've never done "it", but can "it" be used to control someone or a relationship?...
A. 29 January 2009: I'll agree with "The old Man?" Yes, sex can be used both ways in a controlling manner, but it is also known as "playing games." Both men and women have their needs for sexual satisfaction, which is innate. When either mate withholds sex for some ... (read in full...)
He can't seem to perform and only wants oral sex
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for little over two months now. We have a wonderful relationship overall, but have been facing some issues when it comes to sex. He seems to love (almost prefer) oral sex and we do that the majority of the time. ...
A. 27 January 2009: Oral sex (fellatio, in this case) provides the man stimulation that far exceeds that of copulation in most cases. The activity of the lips, tongue, hands and walls of the mouth, skillfully applied, greatly excites the nerve endings in the glans ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend just joined the Marines, how can I feel better about this new situation?
Q. My boyfriend of 3.5 years just came home today with big news. He enlisted. He's a Marine. We have been talking about this for about 10 days, but he's been thinking about it for a long time. We're both liberal minded folks, me definitely more of a ...
A. 27 January 2009: This is indeed a trying time for you, and he as well, But although I never served (volunteered but not quite qualified in 1968), my best advice is to be very proud. His service will certainly improve opportunities for the rest of your lives. ... (read in full...)
Can a guy wait for a girl if she's not ready?
Q. Hey Cupiters! Question for all... I just started a new relationship with this guy. The passion is soooo there but I like to take things slow in the beginning with any guy not just him. You know get to know each other more and go from there... But ...
A. 27 January 2009: Whatever is comfortable and right for you. If not good enough for him, then he is probably not worth it. Sexual relations between lovers are entirely mutual and consenting, or always should be.... (read in full...)
We are all human right, so there isn't a distance to love, love has no bounds, right?
Q. I need some help. Okay so I have been talking to this brilliant guy he is everything I am looking for in a man. This is all online on a forum not this forum this is the only place I can ask for advice without coming across a weirdo. I have s...
A. 27 January 2009: Well I have been in that situation quite often in the past year or so. Currently with a young woman about 140 miles away in Texas. We plan to meet about halfway soon, but then if things progress, we will spend most of our time far apart. This will ... (read in full...)
GUYS: does nipple size and colour really matter?
Q. Ok guys. This is a pretty weird question but I've heard a lot of stuff recently that has made me question; do guys actually care about the size of a girls nipples? Ive heard some guys make fun of ''burger nips'' and just generally poking fun at th...
A. 26 January 2009: Doesn't matter much to me, but I'm a much older man. Personally, the larger the nipples are the better for sucking and fondling, and I guess that I have been a little disappointed with a couple of recent girlfriends that hardly had much of a nipple. ... (read in full...)
Do all married men want to make love to other women?
Q. My problem is I can't stay away from other women. I have been married 9 years and we have two children. I love to flirt and make love with other women but I feel guilty. I am happy with my wife and we have good sex every week (or so). I don't want ...
A. 26 January 2009: In America, women have freedom, and we rather like it that way. But yes, if married it is best to take care of your spouse faithfully.... (read in full...)
Guys: Is the first thing you notice about a girl REALLY the size of her chest?
Q. So, I'm in high school, and I've come to notice a trend in guys' behavior. (well the ones I'm around at least) They always stare at your chest. There's one guy, when asked if he knew me, said, "Oh yeah, she has really big boobs." Swear to God. My ...
A. 26 January 2009: I'm of a different generation, but even when I was much younger I was not all that focused on breasts. Honestly, a fairly pretty face, long hair, sweet personality and overall figure was much more important then and now. ... (read in full...)
Oral sex question
Q. Hi I really need help on this. I am not very experienced and I just gave oral sex for the first time, he begged me for it. I dont know if I was doing a good job and only did it for about a couple minutes before he came. I asked him how it was and he ...
A. 26 January 2009: Once he has ejaculated and begins to go soft, it is basically all over. In some cases, a man may remain hard, but if the climax was very intense, the head of the penis is extremely sensitive. In such a case, he may resist further stimulation and ... (read in full...)
Should I meet up with this other man even although I know I shouldn't???
Q. I've read a lot of questions here and other sites about being married, and getting obsessed with another man.... I'm in the same boat.... married 16 years.... Current financial and job related stresses for my DH. I've traveled the world with him ...
A. 26 January 2009: You know that you answered your own question correctly, but I'm possibly one of the most permissive here. I know, and know of, several people who occasionally risk their marriages for the same reason. It's in every way wrong and unwise, of course, ... (read in full...)
Do all married men want to make love to other women?
Q. My problem is I can't stay away from other women. I have been married 9 years and we have two children. I love to flirt and make love with other women but I feel guilty. I am happy with my wife and we have good sex every week (or so). I don't want ...
A. 25 January 2009: The brutal truth is that men are essentially polygamous in nature. Yes, we want to spread our seed wildly and it is our ingrained and natural tendency. This kind of urge passed down from times when the proportion of men to women was less, but nature ... (read in full...)
I can't believe I went out with this guy!
Q. I went out on a date with someone I would never find attractive. Now I just feel gross. Is this a cry for help? Temporary insanity? Boredom? What if I the guy I like finds out? What do I tell him?...
A. 25 January 2009: How are we to possibly determine what this posting is about?... (read in full...)
How do I meet women?
Q. I don't know how to meet women. Well, I have been using EHarmony for a few months and it was great at first, but I do not get very many matches anymore and the ones that I do get are mostly inactive or non-subscribers. I would like to go to a club ...
A. 25 January 2009: Internet dating is fine but E-Harmony and many others are a rip-off. As "smeedle" recommended, there are some free ones, such as craigslist, but you may hook-up with some real dirt bags, so be cautious. My recommendation is to hang out where the ... (read in full...)
I just wanna know how to get over someone!
Q. I don't know how to explain this so I'm just gonna say it. I've had some problems in the best with relationships because I seem to always fall insanely 'in love' with the wrong people - and it drives me insane because I can't get over them until ...
A. 25 January 2009: Won't you please try to realize that you are so very young and that, quite naturally, your hormones are raging and it is so easy to be infatuated with most any guy who seems attractive and hot? With time, these insane urges will pass, and you will ... (read in full...)
Calls me babe& hun whats it mean?
Q. if a guy calls you babe and hun does that mean that he likes you ...
A. 25 January 2009: Well, if I were to use those terms, it would certainly mean that I like you. LOL... (read in full...)
I think about sex so much I feel like a guy!
Q. Ever since my boyfriend broke up with me in October, I have been extremelly horny. I masturbate about twice a day and always think about him, he was my first and only. He's a selfish jerk, but sometimes I feel so horny that I actually think about ...
A. 25 January 2009: You will find a lover soon enough, but sex is not like food or the air you breathe. You must breathe and eat to survive, but sexual satisfaction is just not quite as necessary all the time. It can certainly be habitual, even addictive, but I agree ... (read in full...)
What happens to the cum???
Q. I really want to know... okay I'm a 14 year old kid and was just curious about this... when a guy has sex with a girl without a condom, and cums inside her.. where does the cum go, does her vagina obsorb it or somethng? What happens to the cum?? ...
A. 25 January 2009: Yes Dr. Vendetta, and I did have to explain that once. LOL Luckily, he must not have had a sharpened blade at the time, and I married the daughter.... (read in full...)
I'm not comfortable with the woman on top position
Q. I really need your help! I have been dating my boyfriend now for 2 years and i am now trying to avoid sex. Im very shy about it and have started refusing it. Im very embarrased about the fact that i cant get on top of him. When i have tried in the ...
A. 25 January 2009: Well, this position does put the woman in better control, but the man also thrusts upward and, perhaps, just following his rhythm should work. When in the man-on-top missionary position, the woman also responds to his rhythm. It seems pretty much ... (read in full...)
Could this sexual practice be very risky?
Q. Hello dearcupid users, Me and my girlfriend have been sexually active for about 4 years now. Lately we been talking about deepthroat, and, although we would like to try it, i feel like i might put her at risk. I dunno, tearing some tissues, ma...
A. 25 January 2009: Some girls can do it, most simply cannot. If you are about normal size, there is no danger of tearing tissue or anything like that, but allow her absolutely total control. If she can do it comfortably, which is fairly rare, you can release down her ... (read in full...)
Precum equals Pregnancy?
Q. my boyfriend and i had unprotected sex yesterday he told after that he was scared when i asked why he said he did pull out but not when he pre cumed.. can i get pregnate from precum?...
A. 24 January 2009: Yes, but don't panic about it. To a significant degree, it depends on the timing of your cycle. Remember that the highest probability for conception is about midway between your menstrual periods (near ovulation), and least likely during your ... (read in full...)
How can I come to terms with going on dates? I really do hate everything about them.
Q. It's been 7 months since my break up from my 2 year relationship. I finally got my things back from him and I feel pretty resolved about the whole thing. I am ready to move on. But I have no desire to date. I've been turning down dates and I've been ...
A. 24 January 2009: I think that most of us, whether men or women, are uncomfortable about dates. But that is typically how we meet, get to know one another and possibly get a relationship moving along if we wish. It's perfectly okay if you prefer to be alone for ... (read in full...)
What happens to the cum???
Q. I really want to know... okay I'm a 14 year old kid and was just curious about this... when a guy has sex with a girl without a condom, and cums inside her.. where does the cum go, does her vagina obsorb it or somethng? What happens to the cum?? ...
A. 24 January 2009: Please, let's clarify something here. It is true that some ejaculate flows back out, but nature's intended purpose is to impregnate the woman, right? It may not always be the intention of the partners, but it is the biological purpose for sperm. If ... (read in full...)
B/f refusing B J
Q. So, my boyfriend and i have been practicing oral for a while, as me on him. And when i am on my period i still like to treat him even though he cannot treat me. Today i asked him if he wanted to and he said not today... and that he had to use the ...
A. 24 January 2009: Certainly I did not mean to be callous, but I see your point. The suspicion was raised by her statement, "He has never not wanted one..." ... (read in full...)
Low rating on dear cupid?
Q. Why do I have such a low rating on dearcupid? Do I have trolls? haters? Just wondering if anyone can spill me in. I'm new here and I do give brutally honest answers but that's because english wasn't my first language and so sometimes my eng...
A. 24 January 2009: Well I have been contributing here for well over a year, and have tried to provide honest suggestions or answers based on many years of personal experience. In my opinion, the basics about sex, romance and relationships never really change much, and ... (read in full...)
B/f refusing B J
Q. So, my boyfriend and i have been practicing oral for a while, as me on him. And when i am on my period i still like to treat him even though he cannot treat me. Today i asked him if he wanted to and he said not today... and that he had to use the ...
A. 24 January 2009: Okay, you are young for this, but since you are doing it, my question is, "Why is oral satisfaction only for him?" To suggest an answer to the question, however, maybe you are not his only source for his apparent one-sided enjoyment.... (read in full...)
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