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... Send *oubleM a private message | | | *oubleM's profile:DoubleM currently resides in Fort Worth Texas, but has lived in southern California (Hollywood), Hawaii, Europe and North Africa as well as Texas. Attended the University of Texas. Now single (possibly forever) after three marriages, one of 20 years. Mainly tries to help with sexual issues. Views and opinions are very permissive and suggestions are often brief and to the point. |
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What did he mean? Is he just looking for more work, or does he want to see me personally?
Q. Hi, I am in need of some advice from a male perspective! I wont bore everyone with a long story so basically I met this guy the other day after he came round to my house to carry out some work. From the moment I opened the door I thought "wow"! We ...
A. 21 December 2009: To "rhythmandblues2" I just think that it may be a subtle hint. Generally it would not be wise to mix business with an obvious come on. That can get a person fired, but by leaving a phone number and a hint, it gives the woman an opportunity to later ... (read in full...)
Sex with 2 guys, messed up on b/c and now wondering if I could be pregnant?
Q. I'm so confused. I guess maybe I should be asking a dr this, but I just wanna kno if I'm bugging or what? I been on the pill for about six mnths now. I had unprotected sex with guy a on dec 6th nd again on dec 13th. He pulled out both times. The ...
A. 21 December 2009: If you are pregnant and the child is conceived, it may be obvious who the father is based on features and appearance. Of course, the father is responsible and you will likely need a paternity test to prove fatherhood and thereby receive assistance ... (read in full...)
What did he mean? Is he just looking for more work, or does he want to see me personally?
Q. Hi, I am in need of some advice from a male perspective! I wont bore everyone with a long story so basically I met this guy the other day after he came round to my house to carry out some work. From the moment I opened the door I thought "wow"! We ...
A. 21 December 2009: It's man talk for 'I would like to get-it-on with you, call me if you also want to."... (read in full...)
How can guys think its ok to look at porn when they know it bothers their partner?
Q. Just out of curiosity, how can guys think it's alright to lie about porn and continue to look at it when it really bothers their partner? I've never had problems with this (and am not currently), and honestly I don't have problems with porn in ...
A. 21 December 2009: Indeed, pornography can be addictive due the proliferation and ease of availability today. In your age range, 20-something, pornography has been widespread since you were in puberty, but for those of us much older (I'm 60-something) it was quite ... (read in full...)
The majority of questions on here are so trivial
Q. I've been frequenting the site for quite a while now, and although I believe people can gain insightful advice and in its concept its great I've noticed of late how trivial the majority of questions are. This isn't a post to have ago at certain ...
A. 21 December 2009: Certainly some questions are trivial, as are some of the answers or opinions, but I wish that we had had such a resource when I was a teen and young man. ... (read in full...)
How does sex feel?
Q. How does sex feel for a guy, when i decide to have it with my girlfriend, it will be my first time. Like what does it feel like in the inside and in your mind...
A. 20 December 2009: You have supposedly masturbated. Multiply that by at least a factor of ten. As far as what it feels like inserting into a woman, it's warm, slippery, wet and very comforting.... (read in full...)
Sex with 2 guys, messed up on b/c and now wondering if I could be pregnant?
Q. I'm so confused. I guess maybe I should be asking a dr this, but I just wanna kno if I'm bugging or what? I been on the pill for about six mnths now. I had unprotected sex with guy a on dec 6th nd again on dec 13th. He pulled out both times. The ...
A. 20 December 2009: Better to wait a week to ten days following last intercourse to test.... (read in full...)
Sex with 2 guys, messed up on b/c and now wondering if I could be pregnant?
Q. I'm so confused. I guess maybe I should be asking a dr this, but I just wanna kno if I'm bugging or what? I been on the pill for about six mnths now. I had unprotected sex with guy a on dec 6th nd again on dec 13th. He pulled out both times. The ...
A. 20 December 2009: Well, you need to develop some discipline regarding the pills, girl. Nothing wrong with the sex if that's what you want to do, but if you want to avoid unintended pregnancy, then adhere to schedule. Remember that anytime you allow an erect penis ... (read in full...)
Did holding my PC muscle prevent me from cumming?
Q. my gf gave me a hanjjobs and blowjobs and we had sex for like 1 hour and 15 mins but i didnt cum because i kept holding my pc muscle and i didnt cum cuz she had to leave and i was going for so long and it was so nice and stuff but why didnt i cum? ...
A. 20 December 2009: It is true that you can use constriction of the pubococcygeal (PC) muscles to control climax and release, but in my experience, the desire to "let go" eventually reaches a point of no more resistance. Throughout my adult life, I've used the ... (read in full...)
I have oral herpes so can I transmit herpes through oral sex?
Q. Growing up, I got a cold sore once a year or so, and never thought anything of it. My dad got them, mom, grandma, grandpa, brother, etc--I never thought anything of it. Call me stupid, sheltered, or whatever, but it wasn't until this past May wh...
A. 20 December 2009: It is true that oral cold sores are associated with a mild form of the herpes virus (Herpes simplex), but as you say, many of us (about 80 percent) have occasional bouts with a cold sore which is usually quickly healed with a Nystatin cream. Use it ... (read in full...)
Should we lose our virginity to each other?
Q. ok i have a question... my friend introduced me to a girl I fell in love with almost immediately and she wants to to take it to the next leveland have sex.... We have known each other for three years now and I want to. but my parents don't un...
A. 20 December 2009: Much like "RAINORFIRE" my best advice is for you to avoid sexual intercourse under any circumstances until you are of legal age in your state, but you can still have some fun with mutual masturbation, lots of foreplay and possibly some oral ... (read in full...)
Unrequited teacher crush has spiralled me into depression!
Q. I have been in love with my teacher for the past 2 years. Please don't sigh and raise your eyebrows and think "Oh not another pupil-teacher crush, she'll get over it it" and then move on because I desperately need some advice. It did only start o...
A. 19 December 2009: Why don't you simply acquire a boyfriend? That will give you someone else to occupy your attention.... (read in full...)
Sex before marriage, is it so wrong?
Q. I'm a 20-year-old virgin and I'm starting to think that I might just possibly be ready for sex...I'm not sure, but I'm also very nervous. I'm not Christian, but I grew-up in a mainly Christian household and when it comes to premarital sex-"the fear ...
A. 19 December 2009: This is a decision that each person must make on their own. Personally, I live my life in a Christian way in terms of the Golden Rule and the Ten Commandments, and certainly hope for a life after, though sometimes have my doubts. But I've never ... (read in full...)
Nice restaurants, drugs and wild sex..not a great way to start!
Q. I had been seeing this guy I met in a bar for a couple of months. Our relationship had been about excess, nice restaurants, drugs and wild sex (we slept together on the first night.) At first he pursued me but then it seemed like he slightly made ...
A. 19 December 2009: He's what we call a "player" on this side of the pond. Playtime has ended.... (read in full...)
He can't maintain an erection and we've never been able to have sex!
Q. hi there , i have been seeing a new guy for a couple of months now and he is great but he cant seem to maintain an erection for any length of time , this is upsetting as we have never been able to have intercourse because of this . please help !...
A. 19 December 2009: What is his explanation? It could be medical, or possibly psychological, or due to certain medications or drugs. Stress and worry can affect it. Moderate to heavy alcohol use can also cause the problem.... (read in full...)
My love for him grew steadily, but sometimes I miss the feeling of wild mad passion
Q. I love my boyfriend but I feel that I am not in love with him. My boyfriend and I have known each other since we were teenagers although we did lose touch for a few years, I am now 28 and he is 27. I was absolutely head over heels in love with my ...
A. 19 December 2009: It is truly sad that so many men do not know much about pleasing a woman sexually. It is really not very hard to do if they wish to learn. There are some good writings on this Web site, and one of the best books on the topic I've known is "She Comes ... (read in full...)
My husband wants to watch me with another man
Q. I have been married to my husband for 13 years and during this time he has hinted off and on that it would be a turn on for him to see me have sex with another man. I remember at first feeling repulsed by even the thought of being with someone else ...
A. 19 December 2009: All previous responders have clearly advised against this, and I would normally concur. However, as stated on my column page, my views are very permissive. You said that your husband has stated throughout your marriage an interest to "see" you have ... (read in full...)
My relationship is losing it's Spark!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been living together for the last 6 months now and up until 3 weeks ago everything has been great. But lately i have not been getting turned on as much and during sex i often fantasize about something other than him. I am not ...
A. 19 December 2009: It does not sound as if you are truly ready to settle with one man. Just as many, if not most young men about your age are mainly interested in "playing the field," many young women are much the same. Such may be the case with you, but you are ... (read in full...)
My question is: why is it so hard for us to talk about making it official?!
Q. Okay so let me tell you a little bit about my situation..so thrs this guys that ive known for a while but we've decided to be FWB...so far its been great no strings attatched rite?!...well im starting to catch feelings for him..and i know he is too ...
A. 18 December 2009: My suggestion would be for you to stay on birth control until you and he have been married at least a year, selected a nursery room in your new house, painted the walls either blue or pink and put up a white picket fence. ... (read in full...)
Is my compulsion to make women orgasm an addiction?
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm a 28 year old man and I think I'm addicted to making women orgasm. When I'm with a woman I'm intimate with, I just crave making her cum. It really turns me on, but I actually feel almost compelled to do it. I love, LOVE going...
A. 18 December 2009: Well, you may not really need any instruction at all, but you might learn something additional from reading the following:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/what-advice-do-you-have-about-giving-and.html... (read in full...)
Is my compulsion to make women orgasm an addiction?
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm a 28 year old man and I think I'm addicted to making women orgasm. When I'm with a woman I'm intimate with, I just crave making her cum. It really turns me on, but I actually feel almost compelled to do it. I love, LOVE going...
A. 18 December 2009: Well certainly, up to a point, you are what I would call way above normal. It's sounds as if you have been reading my articles about pleasing women, but I do not intend to come-off boasting. My suggestions are archived here. It is simply that - what ... (read in full...)
Before we married he wanted sex many times a day, after marriage not at all!
Q. I wanted to ask, my husband since we got married stop wanting sex with me from the wedding night and even the honeymoon, in four years of marriage we had little sex, I was always crying for it, yes crying, I am not fat, I am young and I am Latin, he ...
A. 17 December 2009: Well, you say that you left and are divorcing. Put it all behind you and find a better mate rather than dwell on a mistake. We would not know "why" he was a weirdo, but he may have had affairs going on. ... (read in full...)
I have strong feelings for my best friend...but now hes dating someone else...
Q. what would be the best thing to do if i have strong feelings for my best friend but hes started dating someone else and its killing me to stay friends with him help what should i do ??...
A. 17 December 2009: Stay friends, but as far as romance is concerned, start looking around elsewhere.... (read in full...)
I'm really shy and need some advice on how to make the next move!
Q. Hey wondered if you could give me afew tips. Ive liked this guy for ages he a great friend to me, always thought he liked me. However things got difficult, other people got in the way and hes not the most confident person in the world. Which is ...
A. 17 December 2009: Let him take the lead, young lady. That is "his" job at this point, not yours. Of course, I've always enjoyed a woman coming on strong, and they usually had me for awhile - some for months or years. But some guys will quickly lose interest if you ... (read in full...)
How can I feel like a martyr because my married lover makes me feel misled and used
Q. Dear Cupid, I am very confused and I need your advices. I am with an online relationship for 3 yrs, and I met a senior married man of 65 and I am 34 separated woman. I know it is wrong to involve myself to a married man but I just couldnt r...
A. 17 December 2009: Well I know little about cybersex, but my opinion is that is certainly not as serious as actually meeting and having a physical relationship. To me, cybersex is rather silly, but fairly innocuous as long as it doesn't lead to an actual physical ... (read in full...)
I wasn't penetrated so I'm still a virgin, aren't I?
Q. ok so here's thing... last night my boyfriend and i were in the back seat of his car and we were just mucking around exploring each other's bodies, when he started to push against me which was fine because i wanted him to but i didn't want him to e...
A. 17 December 2009: You are still a virgin until your vagina has been penetrated by a man's erect penis. However, sex has a broader definition which includes other activities as well as intercourse, regardless of former U.S. President Bill Clinton's definition.... (read in full...)
Dad caught me masturbating
Q. Im 14 years old and i dont know wat to do because my dad caught me masterbaiting. My dad isnt the best understanding person. what should i do? Also i want to ask a girl out but i have acne i dont want to get turned down and im not that good at talki...
A. 17 December 2009: Contrary to at least one responder's advice, my suggestion to you is to say nothing about it to your dad unless he brings it up. If he does say something, just say something like, "Well dad, I thought it was quite normal." Because it IS normal, and ... (read in full...)
Stimulating my boyfriend...
Q. Hi can anyone help me. I have met a new guy and we have had intercourse on a couple of occasions but he has hinted that he would like a hand job. One problem. He doesnt seem to have any skin to pull up and down over his penis. he has a plump shiney ...
A. 16 December 2009: Well, since legal age in Great Britain is apparently 16, then I'll respond.
All you need to do with a circumcised male is to take a grip a little lower down the shaft. There will be plenty of skin to give a sliding motion with any normal circ... (read in full...)
I've been dumped, but am unsure if I should leave the door open for him
Q. I just got dumped by my boyfriend of 9 months. He said he didn't feel the same way about me that he did when he first got together with me, and he thinks the relationship is pretty much doomed. He told me he wants to think about things and call me ...
A. 16 December 2009: You probably don't need to move on for "good," because it is usually a poor idea to burn down bridges. But at your age, it's also a good idea to realize that some or most of your younger affairs will likely be temporary. Consider a merry-go-round. ... (read in full...)
I can't maintain my "oomph"
Q. Ok, serious problem, I have finally met the girl of my dreams and we really have a future together, But there is a problem i am having with her that i have NEVER had with another girl. When we are going to have sex, i get very hard and really turned ...
A. 16 December 2009: Performance anxiety. You are so fired up to do a great job at sex that you simply jinx yourself. That's my suggestion as a possibility. Could be wrong. ... (read in full...)
I love my husband but I TOTALLY love my best friend!
Q. I've been married for 11yrs.I love my husband,but I'm totally in love with my best friend. we've been together since 2nd grade.We r just made for each other. We see each other offten and talk everyday.I just don't know how 2 be without him.Do anyone ...
A. 16 December 2009: Can you just remain best friends without complications, such as wanting intimacy? If not, your marriage may prove increasingly difficult. What do YOU plan to do? ... (read in full...)
17 and a 40 year old having sex?
Q. Hello. I was just wondering if it's ok for a seventeen year old girl to have sex with a forty year old man? I've known him for a few months and we've been talking a lot. I really like him and want him. I know that it is a significant age difference, ...
A. 16 December 2009: Some of my friends and fellow advisors will differ with me here, because I cannot condemn activity which I have done myself without being a total hypocrite. Case in point: At about age 50, a relationship developed with a woman half my age, which she ... (read in full...)
I gave some gifts to my professor, but apart from sying thankyou I havent heard further from him
Q. I gave a gift to my ex- professor, actually there were 3 gifts, a box of brownies, a box of caramel sticks and a gift wrapped, which contained a Parker pen and a note written ''remembering you this season... thanks for being nice'' my name, and my ...
A. 16 December 2009: He possibly has enough sense to realize that you could represent a very dangerous situation, but you did not mention his age, your own true age and the situation there in the Philippines regarding rules and law. ... (read in full...)
How many times a day should you masturbate?
Q. i know it sounds weird but i really want to know. how many times should a person masturbate. because i do it 5-6 times a day which i think it is unhealthy. i tried stopping but i just cant. so tell me how times so i can be convinced and limit ...
A. 16 December 2009: Well that post from the anonymous female cracked me up. Would be somewhat true if she had known me about 45 years ago, best as I can remember. lol In truth, I think the last time I ever exceeded one time a day was when I was about 14. Okay, maybe ... (read in full...)
How many times a day should you masturbate?
Q. i know it sounds weird but i really want to know. how many times should a person masturbate. because i do it 5-6 times a day which i think it is unhealthy. i tried stopping but i just cant. so tell me how times so i can be convinced and limit ...
A. 15 December 2009: Well, I don't recall ever doing it 5-6 times a day in my life (62 years), but a couple times daily on occasion, yes. But who is to say what is normal? ... (read in full...)
Am I weird for liking "looser" girls?
Q. I really prefer a women who is loose over one that is tight. I just think it feels better. Also I really enjoy girls playing with big toy. Am I really weird or is there other people that feel this way as well....
A. 15 December 2009: I can't remember . . .... (read in full...)
What can I do to get out of this marriage????
Q. I've been with my husband 15 years and married for 11.. I have no feelings for him at all anymore and as i think honestly i dont think i ever really Loved him as a wife should love her husband... i married him when i was 31... out of 11 years i ...
A. 15 December 2009: Considering your spiritual inclination, my strong advice is this:
God does not want you to be unhappy, and remember that "God helps those who help themselves." Go see your pastor, priest, rabbi or whatever, and I think that you will hear much the ... (read in full...)
Does this sound like the beginning of Erectile Dysfunction to you?
Q. Hi all Ive been with my partner for 18 months now, we see each other weekends mainly due to distance. But are looking for a place of our own. Obviously our sex life revolves around the weekends. This weekend seemed fine, we made love friday ...
A. 15 December 2009: Naw, I really doubt it had anything to do with pending erectile dysfunction problems, and I agree with "Beingblack" that you should chase the idea out of your head immediately. You were probably just a bit stressed or apprehensive. Start worrying ... (read in full...)
How do I initiate giving my boyfriend a blowjob?
Q. Okay so here's the thing. I'm most likely going to give my boyfriend a blowjob sometime soon, and I was just wondering how I could get to that moment to where I am. You know what I mean like do I just say hey I'm going to give you a blowjob! Or like ...
A. 15 December 2009: Hmm, thinking back, I suppose that I've experienced just about every approach imaginable. Some just starting rubbing me, then took it out and went for it, hardly saying a word. Some said something like, "May It suck it" or "Do you want me to suck ... (read in full...)
Does pre-cum contain sperm?
Q. Does Pre cum have sperm in it? I wiped it off myself still yet to cum and the decided to finger my girl friend there was time in between and i tried to wipe as much off onto another surface... i was just not thinking...
A. 14 December 2009: Yes, it can contain some sperm, but it is mainly lubricant. Probably not much to worry about, but be more careful.... (read in full...)
Why am I attracted to older men?
Q. Hi. I am seventeen and a senior in high school. I have a little bit of a problem. I'm only attracted to older men. My friends try to set me up with people in my grade, but I always say no. They ask me why not and I have to lie to them, because I'm ...
A. 14 December 2009: First responder "Flynn 24" has it just about right. Many young women are more attracted to a more masculine male, fully grown and more experienced. It's in the woman's psyche, genetics and hormones. Perfectly normal. In fact, more normal. No need to ... (read in full...)
He wants to get more intimate with me and I feel I'm ready. How can I be less nervous about it?
Q. okay so my boyfriend has been trying to finger me for the past month but I never let him because I wasn't ready. I'm ready now and I want him to, but I'm a little nervous about it! Ya know like whether or not I should shave down there, and that ...
A. 14 December 2009: You should allow this intimacy to progress at a slow pace, in my opinion. Based on your posting, we would assume that he has never even fondled you down there. If that is the case, my recommendation would be for you to allow only kissing along with ... (read in full...)
My first time giving my boyfriend a handjob. How do I know if I did it right?
Q. I just gave my boyfriend a hand job for the first time last nigh. It was also the first time I have ever given one. I was just wondering how I could tell if he enjoyed it or not?...
A. 13 December 2009: If he finished, he enjoyed it.... (read in full...)
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