A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I made a bet to see who can go without sex the longest. It is stupid but I just lost my virginity to him and he thinks I'm addicted and always want it. His conditions if he wins is he's using restraints more than once, gettings bjs whenever and how long he wants and he gets to buy skimpy clothes and when he buys me things I can't complain. Mine were nothing for a month and he has to stop making his regulars being quickies just because he hasn't had sex in 2 months before I gave it to him for my first time ever having sex. I don't wanna lose, people buying me things bugs me I feel bad and wanna pay them back and I don't feel right about it, and I'm shy I can't wear skimpy clothes! HELP! Fast plz :(
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lost my virginity, shy Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2010): just don't have sex with him, it'll be easier for you i'm sure hahaha
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2010): When he is all absorbed by something on ESPN and has had pleanty of beer, walk in butt naked, get comfortable on the couch, and begin masturbating in front of him. Lots of writhing, back arching, moaning, and finger licking is advised. Don't forget to employ all your toys. Make sure he has an onobstrucdted view. Keep doing this every night until capitulates. Oh, and when he does, make him wear a chastity belt for a month. Or, you could do what sounds best, and find a boyfriend who actually respects you and won't subject your sexual fulfillment to his little boy whims. Get a real man who puts your happiness above his adolescent fantasy. Not this pu**y.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (24 April 2010):
 I agree with all chigirl said.
I also think the bet is silly because either of you can masturbate in private :-). How do you know for sure he isn't masturbating?
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (23 April 2010):
 Silly bet. If you have a problem in the bedroom it will not be solved by this as you will still have a problem with him buying you things and you will still have a problem with him saying you are a sex addict.
If there is mutual rspect and admiration in the relationship you should call off the bet and talk things through. If he is saying you want to call it off because you are chickening out he is acting like a big baby and honestly you might be better off without him.
You dont want sex to be a quickie and you and him need to compromise. You should get sex the way you want it as much as he gets it the way he wants it.
As for the skimpy clothes though, it wouldn't harm you to try out new things and take a dare. And if he wants to buy you things let him, there's no reason for you to feel bad about it unless he uses it to emotionally blackmail you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2010): What do you need help with? Not having sex. Just don't do it. Easy. Show some self control.
It sounds like this is a weighted bet! He has a great deal if he wins. To me, it sounds like he wants you to be his sex toy. You need to ask yourself if this is what you want for yourself.
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A
female
reader, Just Diana  +, writes (23 April 2010):
 Hey, its me again, my answer to your question was bothering me. So here goes again, ...communication is so very important in a relationship. You really do need to be able to speak to your partner openly and honestly around these issues. You have mentioned not enjoying wearing skimpy clothes, howver I am also wondering if you you enjoy giving oral sex and him using restraints? It sounds to me like you are wanting the gentleness and tenderness of love making?
I think being playful in and during sex can be wonderful, however to my mind, this comes in mature relationships. realtionships were there is trust and a real mesh of knowing the other, that creates the safe space.
I would really urge you to try and talk to himabout how you are feeling. This is so important. You can do it!
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A
male
reader, themonkey39  +, writes (23 April 2010):
 Masturbate?
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