My visiting a strip club upset my girlfriend ... how do I fix this?
Q. I need help fixing things with my girlfriend. Over the last few months she has gone off sex quite a bit and we only really have it once a week just now. She's been to the doctor who said she is physically fine so it might be stress or something. ...
A. 9 December 2014: You *do* realize that what you did was, in fact, cheating on her, right?? All of the ones here who are suggesting that he stop apologizing aren't seeing this from every angle.
You said that you paid for another woman to turn you on, right? ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend didn't back me up when someone attacked me verbally. Is he not right for me?
Q. My boyfriend and I flatted with another couple and a guy this year. We moved out of the flat a couple of weeks ago but I still have to finish collecting my stuff and do a clean. I have planned to do this in two weeks time. Our lease runs out in mid ...
A. 9 December 2014: If you're still paying rent, you can have your stuff there for as long as you damn well feel like it! She would be in the right only if you were DONE paying rent. This other woman is in the wrong for demanding you take your things out of a ... (read in full...)
Almost 17 and not kissed yet. Am I a freak?
Q. Hey guys... I just want to know something... Does it make me a freak to be almost 17 and not had my first kiss yet? The fact doesn't really effect me, but my friends like to make a big deal out of it so it makes me feel like I'm a freak. ...
A. 6 December 2014: I can tell exactly what the issue here with you is.
Given by what you just typed about yourself on here (stupid, ugly, insecure, not a single chance you'd ever get male attention), you're throwing off a bad vibe.
Your friends already say you'... (read in full...)
Mum says he is annoying me because he's trying to get my attention, is she right?
Q. there is this guy in my class who constantly teases me and tries to annoy me by touchimg my hair coz he know it annoys me. we sit near eachother in class coz the teacher put us near eachother. him and his friends make fun of me coz im english and ...
A. 5 December 2014: In this case, she's absolutely right. He wants your attention and he wants it BADLY. He and his friends are immature, and this is the sort of behavior immature guys do.
You do not have to put up with it, because he's crossed the line into bul... (read in full...)
How to hide teen hard-ons?
Q. Quick note: I have searched the site A TON already, and can't find anything useful on this, and desperately need help. Hello DC, I'm in a bit of a pickle... I'm 15, and "well endowed" so to speak, at 7 inches. In my gym class, we have to wea...
A. 5 December 2014: I agree with the masturbating before school thing. Also the baggy clothes and the briefs. Boxers are more "tent" revealing. Like the lead character Juno in her eponymous-named movie, "All I see are pork swords".
Also, don't think about PEOPLE... (read in full...)
Why do guys like what they can't have?
Q. Why do guys like pictures of models and half naked women on the internet that they have no chance in being with? Almost every guy I know does this. Some say that they just view them as eye candy and have no respect for them, yet it seems hypocri...
A. 5 December 2014: It's funny, models they'd want to date. Porn stars and prostitutes are a double standard thing. Guys use those women's images for eye candy, and they want sex with them, provided that they're disease free. But date?
I've seen posts on here abo... (read in full...)
Boyfriend refuses to talk about possible bachelor party
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 5 or 6 years,only living together for about 3 or 3 1/2.In 2011, I gave birth to our one and only daughter. His brother got engaged a while back,maybe last year?! My boyfriend wanted/wants to give him ...
A. 5 December 2014: Uhh, does his brother live in California?? I answered your other question before seeing this one.
If your boyfriend is best man, many BP's have a stripper element to them. Stupid I know, but they do. Normally, I'd say lighten up, but in light... (read in full...)
Boyfriend will be gone for 2 months, should I worry about him cheating?
Q. My boyfriend has family that lives in California,and he`s planning to go to Cali for about 2 months to stay with his fam,to attempt to get a record deal (he does Hip Hop), while I stay here in NC with our daughter until he comes back. Should I worry ...
A. 5 December 2014: Uhh, I'd be more concerned about him not coming back than him cheating. He's going to his family, alone, for months, without any sort of lead on a deal? Why hasn't he sent demos to these record companies? Or has he? Does he have any sort of ... (read in full...)
Can males and females really just be friends?
Q. This seems silly, but I honestly wonder this. There was a few posts on a social media site that claimed while females will look at a male as just being a friend, the same is not true for the male. The male, supposedly, almost always has some level ...
A. 4 December 2014: I think that there can be platonic friends between genders, and when I say platonic, I don't merely mean that one or both or either have romantic feelings, because if that is in play, then it's not platonic.
My husband has a few platonic female f... (read in full...)
Will my boyfriend's feelings for me become stronger now that he's finally had an orgasm?
Q. Okay sooo, I made my man cum for the first time ever in life from fellatio . We hav been together now for 6 years and not once could I. He's told me that was his first time cumming this way . Will this change his feelings more now in a g...
A. 3 December 2014: I agree with the anon male reader. If he's been with you for 6 years, it's already love. I think it'll be unforgettable to him, and he'll be appreciative of you who gave him that feeling.
He'll most likely want it a lot more, that is for sure... (read in full...)
In anger he said I'm unattractive
Q. Hi, I have been married for 4 yrs,my husband treats me well except for few small fights.last night we had a fight,he told me in anger,I dont look attractive,he is making love out of sympathy.next moment he realized what he told and not accepting ...
A. 3 December 2014: I'm curious - what was the fight about??
So he said that he's making love to you out of "sympathy" and that you're unattractive. Then, your post wasn't clear, but you said then next moment he realized what he said to you? Was he not aware of... (read in full...)
I am so unhappy and am losing who I am in this marriage
Q. I have been married 28 years and am 51 years old and lhave helped get my husband thru 2 bouts of leukemia. It seems that his needs always have come first and since his illness it has gotten worse. You would think he was. 2 year old that couldn't ...
A. 2 December 2014: It's tough to give you advice. I just lost my father to leukemia, and I would give my whole life to get him back even sick as he was, and my mom feels the same.
You are burned out. You need time to yourself, like a week away. If he's working ... (read in full...)
His staring, and his porn habit, make me feel worthless
Q. Dear cupids I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost a year and things are great apart from a few minor issues. He watches a lot of porn. I realize that he needs a release when we're not together but I made a joke last ...
A. 2 December 2014: There are two things going on here. We'll start with the obvious one, and that's the constant ogling of women while you're with him. Sorry, but that is creepy and disgusting. I wouldn't feel worthless. I would feel gross like I wanted to take a ... (read in full...)
Can I stop her retro-jealousy? How and what can I do?
Q. For starts I'm lesbian. I lost my virginity to my girlfriend 4 years ago. Before we broke up in 2012 I made her aware of her being my first n I'd do anything to save the relationship. The relationship ended in Dec 2012 despite my efforts. So I...
A. 2 December 2014: The way to go is to stop feeding it. As you can tell, this retroactive jealousy is insatiable. It's a bottomless pit, and every bit of information you give her about your other past relationships is like throwing gasoline on a fire. It's never ... (read in full...)
I've become that "once a week" girl and don't know what to do? I've tried cutting ties before. Do I express what I feel?
Q. I've known this man for a year. In the first 5 months he would contact daily, see me as often as he could, do huge romantic gestures. He even told me once I gave him "too much space". 6 months pass and we had a falling out that left him embarra...
A. 1 December 2014: I agree - what was the falling out? Why was he embarrassed by it, and why did you take the coward's way out of deleting him without a face-to-face breakup??... (read in full...)
I sexted another girl ....
Q. I have been with my girlfriend 5 months now and i have really strong feelings for her but a while back i did something i'm not proud of...i sexted another girl.This is my first relationship so I don't know how things work or what could possibly ruin ...
A. 1 December 2014: You "don't know how things work" in terms of sexting other girls when you have a girlfriend?? You knew what you were doing and you knew it was wrong. Having a girlfriend means you're FAITHFUL to her. Would you want her sexting another guy behind ... (read in full...)
Should I Care About My Lack of Title With Special Guy?
Q. I am a single mom who is on disability due to my advanced rheumatoid arthritis. After some bad experiences dating several years ago, I decided to focus on my kids since dating was a hassle. Despite my R.A., I am quite attractive, and am able to ...
A. 1 December 2014: Yes, 5 months is a little different. I stand by what I said about the "I love you" because to WOMEN, it's an emotional expression. To a guy, it's a commitment declaration.
I was reacting to these statements the OP made:
"About a mont... (read in full...)
I want sex as a Christmas present and I want her to fulfill my sexual fantasies! How do I say this to my wife?
Q. My wife keeps asking me what I want for Christmas, but I'm a bit nervous about asking for what I really want - sex. I want to have sex more often - I think she does too. The issue is last Christmas - after copious research - I bought her lingerie ...
A. 1 December 2014: She says that she WANTS more sex with you?? That's a good sign. So what stops her or you? And that's good that you go down on her too. So it makes me wonder about medical reasons.
Does she take medication for depression or anxiety or pain?? ... (read in full...)
Should I Care About My Lack of Title With Special Guy?
Q. I am a single mom who is on disability due to my advanced rheumatoid arthritis. After some bad experiences dating several years ago, I decided to focus on my kids since dating was a hassle. Despite my R.A., I am quite attractive, and am able to ...
A. 1 December 2014: You've been dating for two months. That's way too soon to be exchanging "I love you's", and it is a bit too soon to be pressuring for titles in a relationship. You had sex on the second date, which is your choice.
You've got to back off the whol... (read in full...)
I'm too scared to ask her her boundaries. Should I be so hesitant to ask?
Q. Okay, so my girlfriend and I have been dating for a while, and me and her both really love each other. She's chosen abstinence, and we've made out a couple times, and she's given me a handjob, and I've fondled her breasts, and that's as far as we've ...
A. 30 November 2014: Actually, talking about it with the lights and clothes on is the best course of action, and it sure beats pushing the limits when the lights are off.
She sounds like she's up for "outercourse" with the handjobs and the fondling. If you're i... (read in full...)
I want sex as a Christmas present and I want her to fulfill my sexual fantasies! How do I say this to my wife?
Q. My wife keeps asking me what I want for Christmas, but I'm a bit nervous about asking for what I really want - sex. I want to have sex more often - I think she does too. The issue is last Christmas - after copious research - I bought her lingerie ...
A. 30 November 2014: Before I get into the meat of my advice, I have to give a HUGE "AMEN" to Honeypie's opinion on the type of gift you gave. You didn't give HER a gift. You were trying to give yourself one. She probably saw the emotional string you attached to it ... (read in full...)
I told him I was a virgin, but left out lots of details
Q. Thanks in advance for your advice. 4 months ago I met an incredible man and we have been dating since. He is 23 and I'm 22. We have a great relationship and I can feel that he truly loves me. Both of us know we share something special and I don't ...
A. 28 November 2014: Hmm, well, I have a bit of differing opinion here about this situation based on the wording of most laws in the country that define at what point a sex act is considered "committed".
You tried to have sex twice with your previous boyfrien... (read in full...)
I know that my boyfriend didn't do anything wrong but just running into his ex ruined our night and his behavior didn't make things any better
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for over 4 years. 2 girls before me, he dated a girl for around 3 or 4 years. They've been broken up for over 5 years now. They had an awful relationship where they fought, physically and verbally. She pretty ...
A. 28 November 2014: He couldn't have acted any more noble than he did last night. The fact that he chose to walk outside and get some air was the BEST thing he could have done, yet you were thinking he went home and masturbated to her?!? Sorry, but I think you won ... (read in full...)
Do guys really give up on women that easily?
Q. Have I missed the boat now? I was chatted up on line by a guy who was gorgeous in his youth - judging by his photos, but older now. He wanted to meet for a 1 night stand but I turned him down as I wasn't sure. He is now chasing my friend instead a...
A. 28 November 2014: Heh, my question is - why would you care about this guy??
He wasn't interested in YOU in the first place. He only wanted a quick piece of ass. A fast and easy lay. A penis holder he could hit and quit.
If you aren't interested in a ... (read in full...)
My husband's explanation is not convincing. Is he cheating?
Q. Last night I was going through my husband's phone which he constantly updates and deletes stuff from. I happened to click on the "notes" and the only note I found was from a week ago. It said: "It was good seeing you today, I never knew how dazzling ...
A. 27 November 2014: Alright...yes, your suspicions have merit. Now is the time where you become not only a very good actress, but you need to make him underestimate you. I know you're emotional, and I would have advised you not to have confronted him yet on this, but ... (read in full...)
He's become distant and seems bored with the relationship
Q. Hi everyone.. So me and my boyfriend has been in long term relationship and he's serious about our relationship and take me into his life. He's so caring and loving man that I know. He used to treat me so good and accept me for who I am. He ...
A. 25 November 2014: Your answer is found in your second paragraph.
You can't treat someone badly and expect it not to have short and long-term consequences. You were controlling, now he's resisting that control. You tried to manipulate his behavior, and now he's... (read in full...)
Is it inappropriate to ask a guy to take an STD and HIV test before we date?
Q. Dear Cupid, I haven't dated in a long time but I decided if I should date again would I be wrong to bring up front about taking STD and HIV test.My health is in great condition and I want the same for the new guy.Thanks ...
A. 25 November 2014: I agree with the others. The right time is when you both have dated to the point where sex is starting to become a possibility.
Then, whether you're in good health or not, you propose that BOTH of you get tested. It wouldn't be right that you... (read in full...)
I told him I wanted him out of my life but he won't move out
Q. I'm back, some of you probably read my firt question and i must say i got some great advice, so here we go again. Just a reminder of what i had going on, I had been questioning about if i had fallen out of love with my guy, after countless trips to ...
A. 25 November 2014: Sorry I'm late to this party!
This is the part where you stop talking to him yourself and secure yourself a lawyer. You don't say anything to him except in the courts, because he's threatened custody of your child, and because you need help fil... (read in full...)
I feel like I would be killing a cute lovable puppy saying "no" to him!
Q. I have been single for 4 years now but have got to a point where yes I miss companionship but I am not desperate. I recently met a guy online, we talked for about 2 weeks and met up. Ive now seen him couple of times and he is lovely, he is 3 years ...
A. 25 November 2014: You guys met after 2 weeks, had 4 dates, and you had sex with him even when you didn't want to get physical??
Get the puppy idea out of your head, because he'd knife the poor dog in the pursuit of pressuring sex from you.
You're hurtin... (read in full...)
Am I too tight?!
Q. Hello, I'm a complete virgin, never been fingered or touched at all.. Whenever I've got Into situations (being alone with a guy etc) I've always completely freaked out and sometimes started crying.. I don't want to let the guy down. I'm scared of ...
A. 25 November 2014: You're my son's age! I really don't mean to sound condescending to you by saying this, but you're a KID! Yes, I know, you're 14 and just into puberty and probably all lanky arms, legs, and hormones ripping your brain and body a new one.
You'r... (read in full...)
I don't want him to feel he can disrespect me
Q. Me and the guy I'm seeing were having a phone conversation. I'd be feeling a little down because he's not very affectionate and generally i feel like he takes me for granted. While I was speaking on this I could hear him watching a girl's snapchat ...
A. 24 November 2014: You know, when stuff like this pops up in the earlier stages of a relationship, it usually doesn't get better. Best to cut losses, call off the whole thing before you get too invested into it, and hold out hope for someone a lot more emotionally ... (read in full...)
Confused, but better than most!
Q. I have been married for 8 year and have known my wife for 10. I have a near photographic memory and remember many things that people tell me. 10 years ago I contracted an STD from my wife. She found out she had it from a medical checkup. No big ...
A. 24 November 2014: You have a lot of "confidence", but your sex ed knowledge is worse than a sixth grader. Do you honestly think that the only way to transmit an STI is to have intercourse??
You do realize that it is a lot more likely that you passed HER the STI ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend cheated -- what do I do?
Q. First, thank you so much for reading this, I really will appreciate any advice! This happened a couple of weeks ago. My boyfriend (of about 10 months) told me the morning after it happened. He and his friend, his friend's girlfriend, and ...
A. 24 November 2014: Alright. First of all, yes, he was unfaithful. But he didn't have sex with her nor did anything that resulted in his ejaculation. So, if you were to compare the level of his unfaithfulness to say, an injury, given that his having sex with someone ... (read in full...)
My wife won't have sex with me anymore and won't tell me why not
Q. I think the title says it all. We have been married for 7 years, together for 10 years, and the sex went from twice a night (which is normal in a honeymoon phase) to never over the course of 2 years. Over the last 5 years we have not had se...
A. 23 November 2014: YIKES! Married 7 years, only had sex for 2 out of 7? That is no good. I totally understand, and I would be climbing the walls if I had to go without sex like that.
I have some questions for you which could both shed light on the situatio... (read in full...)
I feel like we are no longer a family- just outsiders watching him and his family enjoy their time together.
Q. My daughters father supervises visits between his son and ex wife. He invites her over to our place- and doesn't ask me first how I feel. Their interaction has gone as far as since the visits, he has spent most- minus two, of his days off with his ...
A. 22 November 2014: That's a bit strange that he is supervising visits with his ex-wife and son. Isn't the point of his time with his mom to be exclusive time, and if it has to be supervised, it should be with someone appointed by the courts??
That, and he's inv... (read in full...)
My best friend freaked out over the 'maid of honor' title
Q. My Best friend just completely freaked out on me because she isn't going to be my Maid of Honor. Best friend and I have been best friends for over 20 years. We have both been there for each other in good times and bad. I was the maid of honor at...
A. 22 November 2014: Yeah, I agree with Chigirl AND the other anon. Why not have two?? I take the "best friend" philosophy. I have a current "best friend". I have one from my high school years and still stay in touch with her (heh, she was my maid of honor!). Both ... (read in full...)
I found out my wife worked as a prostitute
Q. I got married 6 months ago. After marriage i found out my wife i Was a prostitute im just shell shocked. I dont know how to cope with it? Im just gone mental. I told her how treeible im feeling roght now and i told her to end this marriage...
A. 22 November 2014: "Prostitutes are people too. But so are men. Millions of us have never hired a prostitute."
Not to be a devil's advocate here, and I don't have a problem with porn unless it's a spun out of control addiction like alcohol can be, but if you "mil... (read in full...)
I found out my wife worked as a prostitute
Q. I got married 6 months ago. After marriage i found out my wife i Was a prostitute im just shell shocked. I dont know how to cope with it? Im just gone mental. I told her how treeible im feeling roght now and i told her to end this marriage...
A. 22 November 2014: To the OP, how do you know she was one? And was she an escort (i.e. high paying)?
To the male anon, I totally get where you're coming from, and I'd agree with you if she LIED to him about her past or misrepresented who she was.
However, if s... (read in full...)
Stupid for wanting him back
Q. I am stupid for wanting my husband back after 23 years of marriage? He left 7 months ago and said it was over, moved to another state, had a fling, that didn't work out. What ever happened really messed with him He thought about trying to work it ...
A. 22 November 2014: You want what is comfortable. His every single action dictates that he in fact DOES want to be out of your life. Even the sexting crap shows that he's just using you like a comfortable pair of shoes because he knows you'll put up with it. He ... (read in full...)
My best friend freaked out over the 'maid of honor' title
Q. My Best friend just completely freaked out on me because she isn't going to be my Maid of Honor. Best friend and I have been best friends for over 20 years. We have both been there for each other in good times and bad. I was the maid of honor at...
A. 22 November 2014: It's not that I disagree with Honeypie on this, but it's more that I see this from an entirely different perspective.
I get that you miss your sister, and I'm sorry for your loss. But what on earth are you thinking?! Yes, it's understa... (read in full...)
He pulls the disappearing act but gets upset when I do it.
Q. My boyfriend of 2 years has made it clear he doesn't like it when I don't answer his calls or text back right away. However, he has previously gone out drinking all night and failed to tell me and I'm left wondering when he goes MIA for hours. L...
A. 20 November 2014: Doesn't sound like you two live together if he's sleeping when you're calling him.
Maybe I may have a more old-school view on things, but to me, a "disappearing act" is days, not hours. I don't get mad if the guy I'm with takes a night off or t... (read in full...)
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