A
female
age
,
*eartbroken63
writes:I am stupid for wanting my husband back after 23 years of marriage? He left 7 months ago and said it was over, moved to another state, had a fling, that didn't work out. What ever happened really messed with him He thought about trying to work it out and then decide no, but likes to sex text me. I am heart broken I don't want a divorce. I love him. I want him back so bad, but don't even know what to do. I don't think he wants a divorce either.
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (22 November 2014):
 You want what is comfortable. His every single action dictates that he in fact DOES want to be out of your life. Even the sexting crap shows that he's just using you like a comfortable pair of shoes because he knows you'll put up with it. He truly has you under his thumb and is playing with your feelings.
Honestly, he leaves you, leaves the STATE, has a fling (which if he left the state to go have this fling, then he was long-term cheating on you and checked out of the marriage LONG before he told you he did), now he has buyer's remorse because OMG, she actually demanded more than just secret fling-sex on the sly.
Whatever happened to him didn't mess HIM....it's messing YOU. You have to change the way you think from pining for what was to thinking he's disgusting and you can do a lot better. Don't think your age will class you out of genuine happiness with a good guy. I lost my father just over a year ago, and my mom, who is about to be 66 years old, already has a guy who is sweet on her. A neighbor, in fact! Of course, even though he's a good guy and they get along together, my mom is still feeling "too soon". But my point is - you do NOT have to even think of being alone.
He has never once really felt the remorse of hurting you. The crushing regret that his selfishness lost him that which was the most precious to him. All he thought of was his penis and his mid-life crisis. You're still feeding into that too. Time to cut him off and let him stew in the state he's living in, and it's time for you to start enjoying the free single life! What's good for him is good for you, and there is no such thing as "too old".
Something tells me that, given his still sexting you, if he got a whiff of you going out there and thinking about another guy who is better than him with you surrendering to his embrace and locking lips with him, he'll feel a pain much worse than he ever put you through. And you'll be able to actually sleep at night!
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